chrysalis1789: Woosh, we've got a room!

chrysalis1789: You can be as descriptive as you like.
chrysalis1789: ...whatever it is you feel that you need to describe...

Umbral Platypus: I'm going quick ass Dracula in tux w/o jacket and half cloak
chrysalis1789: Go Will!
chrysalis1789: Half-assed and classic.

chrysalis1789: Anyway. We get no Caroline and no Robert tonight, and death comes quickly for your sick, distracted ST.
ChronicLunacy: Play anyway?

chrysalis1789: Lindsay's suggested that I start out "One day in hell..."
ChronicLunacy: It is a good beginning.
chrysalis1789: But that doesn't make any sense at all, so we're going to have to find some other way to start.
Umbral Platypus: how about once upon a time
ChronicLunacy: The Bahamas are islands.

chrysalis1789: It's summer, but ridiculously chilly for summer.
chrysalis1789: Since the summer students at the local college like any occasion to hold a party, they're currently having a "Too Damn Cold for Summer" party at an off-campus residence hall, complete with scarves and a band.

chrysalis1789: Some bagpipe music starts up, which is a sign to get the hell out of the room if you know what's good for you.
Umbral Platypus: ::gets the hell out, knowing what's good for him::

chrysalis1789: Next time I come up with a brilliant idea like housing students, I want you to hit me with a brick.

Umbral Platypus: ::Dmetri knocks politely, if slightly frantically at the door then pushes it open and steps in quickly:: Sorry to barge in ::nods to Balthasar and Gala:: Camera started with the pipes.

ChronicLunacy: ::At Dmetri's entrance, he looked up to...[]And .[]

chrysalis1789: We can say, for the sake of argument, that Dmetri got pulled out of the room by some slightly rabid freshman s and we were powerless to stop him.

Session One

chrysalis1789: People are falling-down-drunk, and there's a lot of misplaced winter clothing.

Draconius: ::looks around:: Hmm bagpipes

chrysalis1789: Frankie (other nocker): Too much goddamn punch in the ing vodka bowl.
dramadiva102: "Seriously. Don't you guys have any more vodka?"
chrysalis1789: Frankie and James give the an appraising look. James offers up his flask.

chrysalis1789: People have started shouting, some of them in delight and some of them in anger. Some drunken guys near the punch bowl are getting particularly rowdy in a rather negative way. On the other hand, there are some ladies tossing panties.
dramadiva102: ::Drinks some vodka, and shouts with delight::
Draconius: ::looks at the crowd confused:: "What's wrong with those s that don't like the pipes!”
dramadiva102: "I love bagpipes. And vodka."

Umbral Platypus: ::enjoys his joint quietly in the corner::

chrysalis1789: A drunken college sophomore throws a brown Rainbows brand flip-flop at the vodka bowl.
Draconius: "THE VODKA BOWL!!!!!!"
Draconius: ::dives to catch it to keep it from spilling!::

Draconius: "Who ed with the VODKA BOWL!!!"
chrysalis1789: Frankie and Rainbow Shoe are still under the table, beating each other senseless.

chrysalis1789: The majority of the crowd is calmed, except Frankie. Frankie's enraged and trying to kill Rainbow Shoe under the table.

Draconius: "Hmm I no longer hunger for human flesh"

chrysalis1789: Perception + alertness, difficulty four to find the bathroom. This place is crazy wild.
*OnlineHost*: Draconius rolled 4 10-sided dice: 4 1 3 3
Draconius: I in a bush
chrysalis1789: You're inside, but okay. I'm sure there are potted plants.

dramadiva102: ::Makes way to stage, not getting any trouble, since she's with the band::

Umbral Platypus: ;:plays soothingness... smokes joint::
chrysalis1789: Even with the soothingness, there are people congregating in the hallway outside of Gala's office. Because somebody is obviously getting their ass beaten.
Umbral Platypus: ::considers using the joint to sooth instead of the guitar::

dramadiva102: "You are an above-average bagpiper player"

chrysalis1789: Camera: There's always a drunken mob of brawling. See? There's one over there and I'm not even playing.
Umbral Platypus: It did start with the bagpipes though.

chrysalis1789: C: Bah. Getting fired should never obstruct your beer.
dramadiva102: "The bartender is the one who fired me. So at the very least I need a new source of beer"
chrysalis1789: C: A crying shame, to be sure. There's beer to be had, . Don't worry.
chrysalis1789: Sandal Boy is doing his best to oblige the shouts of "Fight!"
Umbral Platypus: there's still beer over there ::takes another puff on the joint:: Should we rescue it before the fight manages to knock it over?

chrysalis1789: C: Let no harm come to the alcohol.
dramadiva102: "Sure, let's save the beer"

Umbral Platypus: ::leads the glorious crusade to protect the beer... or wanders over to the table and grabs two bottles in each hand::

chrysalis1789: C: Gala's parties always end like this. The guests fight. The musicians drink all the booze.
Umbral Platypus: Amen
dramadiva102: "Can I get more gigs here? This is good with me"

Draconius: "What the is going on over here?! And you with the sandal pull your pants up I don't need your privates all over me... is anyone else smelling fish?"

Umbral Platypus: ::considers how to drink one of his beers and not loose his joint::
Umbral Platypus: ::sighs and puts three of them back on the table::
chrysalis1789: Camera hands Daniel a straw.
Umbral Platypus: You can't straw a beer... it's amoral

chrysalis1789: One of your nockers is passed out under a table.

dramadiva102: "So do we flag him down and offer a beer, or wait for him to collapse and walk over with beer?"
chrysalis1789: C: It's either that or pitch it at his head.
Umbral Platypus: Collapse... then pitch?
dramadiva102: "That could damage the beer. Not kosher. At all"
chrysalis1789: C: Or pitch and aim for the head, then watch him collapse.
dramadiva102: "I can't believe you two want to waste beer. Pitch an empty bottle."
chrysalis1789: Camera pitches an empty bottle at the boggan.
Umbral Platypus: ::drains his bottle:: You have a point ::joins the club and throws::
dramadiva102: "Why not?"
dramadiva102: ::follows suit::
* chrysalis1789: Camera throws another empty bottle, followed by an empty Pringles can.
chrysalis1789: Rosi, you weren't expecting those bottles. No dodge.
chrysalis1789: One bottle gets you in the back of the leg.
chrysalis1789: And a Pringles can knocks you on the shoulder.

Draconius: "you're all ers you know that. I'd never throw a bottle to get someone's attention."
dramadiva102: "You have no way of knowing what you might do under extraordinary circumstances... "

dramadiva102: "Offering booze is always nice."

dramadiva102: "I'm between steady jobs."
chrysalis1789: C: And enjoying the fine company of this lovely lady and this fine marijuana-smoking young man.
Umbral Platypus: I’m looking for free food ::pats pocket bulging with wrapped sandwiches::

Draconius: "Why did i drink all those beers.. mom always said i was a cheap date"
dramadiva102: "You drank them because you were angry. But you are, apparently, a cheap date."
chrysalis1789: C: Nothing wrong with a cheap date.

chrysalis1789: Cameron takes a package of crackers out of his pocket and hands it to the cheap date.

Draconius: "we'll you found a cheap date! ::hiccups and then turns and vomits:: help ::meekly::"

chrysalis1789: Camera successfully dodges vomit.

dramadiva102: (Benton chuckles a lot)
ChronicLunacy: []He does.[]
ChronicLunacy: []It's his thing.[]
chrysalis1789: (My thing has never made me chuckle)

Session Two

Draconius: give out the xp!!!... and ponies
chrysalis1789: Will is the only person who hasn't gotten his xp.
Draconius: oh well then i say we give him a pony
Draconius: no xp just a pony

dramadiva102: bitchy isn't long-term contagious

dramadiva102: "I've only been here a week or so. And I don't generally pay attention to local politics"
chrysalis1789: C: What's Virginia like?
dramadiva102: "Seelie....grrrr. Unseelie.....grrr."

dramadiva102: ((fair enough))
Draconius: ((magic missile?))
chrysalis1789: (wistfully) "Unions."

chrysalis1789: There's a coffee pot. And it has some brownish, cold liquid in it that might be coffee.
chrysalis1789: If you'd gotten more than four successes, not only would have there been coffee, it would have danced and poured itself...

Draconius: hmm
Draconius: i heat it up
chrysalis1789: It bubbles sickly.
Draconius: hmm
Draconius: i pour it out

chrysalis1789: The coffee-sludge begins to eat away at the rubber plug in the sink...
dramadiva102: "Pipe-man, does coffee usually do that? Even when very old?"
chrysalis1789: Camera shrugs.
chrysalis1789: "I don't know anything about nobles' coffee.”

chrysalis1789: Camera is watching the old coffee chew up the sink with rapt fascination.

Draconius: ::crosses upstage right to the phone then dials James or Frankie's number::
Draconius: ::cheats out towards the audience::
chrysalis1789: You get a flat tone.
Draconius: hmm
chrysalis1789: The audience throws cauliflower.

ChronicLunacy: []Zeb tells me that Will is unconscious.[]
chrysalis1789: Woah. Like, asleep, or like unconscious?
dramadiva102: (paralytic seizure unconscious, or tired unconscious?)

chrysalis1789: The coffee sludge monster has eaten a hole in the sink stopper and is working on the pipes.

dramadiva102: ::gets a mug of coffee::
dramadiva102: ::pauses::
dramadiva102: "Do you think this is safe, or is all the coffee around here scary?"
chrysalis1789: Camera looks at the acid sludge.
chrysalis1789: "We need a cup bearer. Benton, have some coffee."

chrysalis1789: There's a hiss and a clink as part of the piping in the sink falls out.
chrysalis1789: Water is now seeping across the kitchen floor...
ChronicLunacy: He tests the coffee experimentally, sniffing at it then swirling it around in the mug. After the clank, he looks up quizzically. "Why are the pipes rotting out?"
dramadiva102: "How's the coffee?"
ChronicLunacy: Benton puts the mug on the table.
chrysalis1789: Camera shrugs.
chrysalis1789: "More coffee?"
dramadiva102: ::sees Benton is not dead, and gets a mug for herself::
chrysalis1789: Camera gets himself a mug as well.

chrysalis1789: The coffee sludge starts to lick at the linoleum.
dramadiva102: ::hops back on the counter for safety::
Draconius: ::walks back in:: "When did sludge get a tongue?"
chrysalis1789: Camera eyes the sludge.
chrysalis1789: "When this kind evolved."

chrysalis1789: Camera looks at Rosi like he's just promised to have his babies.

dramadiva102: "Nobody else here seems to like you, and I'm trusting their judgment. Until I get to know you for myself."
dramadiva102: "My name's Philyra, what's yours?"
chrysalis1789: "You're a pleasantly blunt little thing, aren't you, -child?"
dramadiva102: ::sigh:: "That's what I hear right before I get fired. Just with angry tones, and cursing."

chrysalis1789: Camera looks at the coffee maker with concern.
ChronicLunacy: No one seems to like me, yet I give them roof over their heads and a dry place to stay and plot whatever they're plotting. I'm just wicked, aren't I? Balthasar raised an eyebrow at Philyra. "I am Sir Balthasar. House
Draconius: Dickwad!
ChronicLunacy: Gwydion." he raises his chin slightly as he introduces himself.
chrysalis1789: The coffee is making agitated noises.
Draconius: ...wait
Draconius: "coughnoblescumcough"
dramadiva102: "Umm. Sir Balthasar, House Gwydion, what is up with the coffee around here?"
dramadiva102: "Did someone curse you? With deadly coffee?"
chrysalis1789: The coffee belches.
ChronicLunacy: "Actually, I didn't have any coffee in the house until now. I assumed someone brought it in from their car."
dramadiva102: "Someone should unplug it. But I think that could result in injury, so I don't want it to be me."
Draconius: "I don't know bout the rest of you but if we're gonna go talk to the union boyz i'd like to do it now. Before the coffee eats me"
ChronicLunacy: Benton unplugs the coffee machine and puts it in a cabinet.

ChronicLunacy: "Will someone at least tell me where you're going and what you're planning on doing and why? I'm still lost."
chrysalis1789: "We're going to the union house. To create a distraction. To distract. Found yet?"
ChronicLunacy: "Now comes the 'why'."
chrysalis1789: "...to distract, that was between 'to create a distraction' and 'Found yet?'"

Draconius: Stroud what's in your wallet?
chrysalis1789: He just picked your pocket.
ChronicLunacy: []Twenty bucks and a coupon for Subway.[]
Draconius: I'm officially the best thief in the world

chrysalis1789: He smiles at you. being a sluagh, it's kind of grotesque, but in a charming way.

ChronicLunacy: "I'm sorry for the rude wake-up, but I'd like to speak with Gala please. I was scheduled to meet her tonight and I was detained. This is Benton Kane calling." he says politely.
chrysalis1789: The Disgruntled Male grunts over the line at Benton.
chrysalis1789: "She's asleep. Like a sane person."

dramadiva102: "Well, I was telling the truth. He shouldn't expect to get things except physical pleasure from parties. And he offered his house. Without asking payment"
chrysalis1789: "And we're leaving his house as soon as possible without blowing it up."
Draconius: "which is more than i can say for most"

Draconius: ::dances a jig:: I didn't think i would get away with it!!! pick pocketing makes me giggle

Draconius: "I coulda swore i mentioned the union hostel.."
chrysalis1789: Camera shrugs. "You were rather incoherent."
Draconius: "Oh... that explains that. I'm a cheap date"

chrysalis1789: Camera croons and swerves the truck in time with the music.

chrysalis1789: Camera's truck does a doughnut on the lawn of the union house.

chrysalis1789: The clock swears "THREE CHRIST-HUMPING TWENTY- ING-ONE!"

ChronicLunacy: Pulling what looks like a small dog whistle from a belt pouch, the knight makes his way off to the side of the building, moving farther away from the Dreaming village he now found himself in. On the outskirts, he sat on
ChronicLunacy: a stump large enough for his considerable mass and put the whistle to his lips. The device made no sound detectable to most ears. (The sluagh working the field behind him let out a yelp.)
chrysalis1789: The sluagh in the field throws rocks.
chrysalis1789: She stomps off to places unknown.

ChronicLunacy: The phoenix descended swiftly and gracefully alighted on the Troll's outstretched arm, not burning anything despite the actively beautiful flames shifting in spectrum from deep blue to light yellow that seemed to make up the bird.
chrysalis1789: ((As opposed to passively beautiful flames))
Draconius: ... you realize how big a phoenix is right?
dramadiva102: it's a midget phoenix
dramadiva102: suspend your disbelief

chrysalis1789: Jerry: Crossed the country in a hot air balloon kind of ruffled. They touched down a bit away from Caer Lobos and need some repairs.
chrysalis1789: Roger gives Jerry a bizarre look for going two sentences without using profanity. "What the 's wrong with you, Jerry?"
chrysalis1789: Jerry: ...sorry. Yeah, through the ing bloody-ass mother ing bitch-shit damn Dreaming.
Draconius: "Shit Jer you feeling the allright?"
chrysalis1789: Jerry: I think I've got the goddamn flu or some like that.

chrysalis1789: Jerry pushes back from the table. "I think I'll take a goddamn nap. I'm not feeling too well. Erm... I mean, I feel ing ass-spewing sick."

chrysalis1789: The clock shrills... "THREE BITCH-WHIPPING COLD TIT THIRTY!"

chrysalis1789: He leads you guys out the back door and towards the souped-up company... wheeled thing.
Draconius: "Ahhh i love this ing thing"
chrysalis1789: It's part wagon, part spider, part all-terrain vehicle, and could only exist in the Dreaming.
dramadiva102: "Wow. That's not normal"

chrysalis1789: Roger starts up the wheeled thing, and as it rolls along you guys can distinctly hear the theme from "Deliverance" playing. Roger grumbles and swears.

dramadiva102: "I think you're only implying you would help in exchange for ual favors, and I am not willing to comply to that bargain"
ChronicLunacy: Sorne: :Looks offended:: What? I would never have...suggested that...::mumbles "out loud"::

chrysalis1789: Camera glares at the male satyr again. "You want to talk so the rest of them can hear you?"
chrysalis1789: Other sluagh raises her eyebrows. "I heard him. Loud and clear, like crunchy things."

chrysalis1789: "I just don't think they're expecting a large silver balloon to sweep through their freehold. Can you stage a... a military coup or something?"
dramadiva102: "A military coup? We just got done saving the world!!"

ChronicLunacy: (Sorne: Help! She's attacking me like I'm the English language!)

dramadiva102: "Everybody calm down. We're not staging a military coup. We're not going on another crazy mission. We could destroy some personal property, though."

chrysalis1789: *signs to the sidhe and the troll in a moment of weird clarity* This probably has something to do with the racial slurs I had earlier.
dramadiva102: "You were paying attention?"
chrysalis1789: *shrugs and signs to the sidhe* It happens sometimes. Pancakes?
dramadiva102: ::to her friend:: "yes, pancakes are good"

chrysalis1789: *nods towards the satyr sleeping* Does she need a pillow? Or some poison?
Draconius: "yeah"
dramadiva102: "We don't poison sleeping people"

chrysalis1789: Seven xp for fixing a balloon, good attitude, and palatable coffee.

Session Three

dramadiva102: i just locked myself out of my room
dramadiva102: but that's ok

dramadiva102: anybody know how to fix a doorframe?
chrysalis1789: Umm. What's wrong with the doorframe?
dramadiva102: I broke it down
dramadiva102: now i need a hammer
chrysalis1789: For the purposes of getting into your room?
dramadiva102: for the purposes of putting my door frame back on

Umbral Platypus: ::goes over to investigate famed coffee::
chrysalis1789: The coffee burps at you.
dramadiva102: ((don't do it man!! it's certain death!!!))
Umbral Platypus: ::takes spoon and dips it in cup::
chrysalis1789: The coffee starts to lick the spoon.
Draconius: ((there goes the spoon))
chrysalis1789: You swear you can hear it muttering to itself.
chrysalis1789: The spoon is developing pockmarks.
Umbral Platypus: ((is there a thermos?))
Draconius: you want to contain the beast?!

chrysalis1789: Okay, the ST magic dime says there's a thermos.
Umbral Platypus: ((I'm gonna have a new friend))
Umbral Platypus: ::gets rubber dishwashing gloves and puts on 2 pair and gets large knife to defend himself with just incase::
chrysalis1789: The bowl of the spoon has now mostly dissolved.
dramadiva102: ((couldn't that stuff eat through a thermos?))
chrysalis1789: The coffee burbles.
Umbral Platypus: Alright magic coffee
Umbral Platypus: if you’re good and don't try to eat me or the thermos I'll take you with me and we'll see the world together
Umbral Platypus: and I might unleash you on anything that attacks me
Umbral Platypus: sound like fun to you??
chrysalis1789: The coffee makes enthusiastic noises.
Draconius: ((coffee Diplomacy))
chrysalis1789: And slithers into the thermos.
Umbral Platypus: (( yeah))

chrysalis1789: "Hey? Hey, you er, where the bloody hell are you?"
chrysalis1789: There's a tall guy with crazy hair in the front hallway.
Umbral Platypus: Can I help you crazy haired cussing guy?

chrysalis1789: The tall guy eyes the knife. "What the 's been going on here? You ing kill somebody?"
dramadiva102: ((no, good sir, I am a coffee tamer!))

Umbral Platypus: I was worried the coffee was going to eat me. But I made friends with it. I think I'll call it sludgy ::turns to thermos:: you like that name??

chrysalis1789: A toaster with moth wings drifts by.
chrysalis1789: Daniel, the hand you're wearing the ring on is now quite green.
Umbral Platypus: ::accepts the toaster without comment::
chrysalis1789: Lloyd sighs. "The stoned kind are the best ing kind. Come on. I'm supposed to drive your sorry ass out to Rosi and his mates."
Umbral Platypus: ::looks at hand:: I think my was laced with some .
chrysalis1789: Lloyd narrows his eyes. "Magic's heavy, quit your bitching."
Umbral Platypus: ::quits his bitching::

Umbral Platypus: Um... you're fairies....
Umbral Platypus: and goat people...
chrysalis1789: Camera grins. "And sluagh."
ChronicLunacy: Satyr: Goat pe...yeah, I guess.
Umbral Platypus: and...:looks at the sluagh::... creepy

chrysalis1789: The butterfly seems briefly confused.
dramadiva102: "Don't confuse the butterfly!!"
ChronicLunacy: Sorne: ::Whispers:: Don't use big words. The butterfly's prone to getting confused and evolving.
chrysalis1789: Cailean looks pointedly at Daniel. "If you pop Tom, I'll pop you."
Umbral Platypus: I'm sorry... but I bet I'm more confused
dramadiva102: "But you don't pop when you're confused. The butterfly does. And he starts religions when he gets back."

chrysalis1789: The butterfly flits. It's okay. Confused is a-ok! I'm Tom. That's God.
chrysalis1789: The butterfly indicates Cailean.
Umbral Platypus: ::looks at Cailean::....
ChronicLunacy: Sorne: Just accept, boy. Just accept.
dramadiva102: "That's Cailean. She's not God."
Umbral Platypus: ...actually that explains a lot

*OnlineHost*: Draconius rolled 8 10-sided dice: 4 5 4 1 1 1 3 4
Draconius: the balloon explodes
chrysalis1789: Guys, duck and cover.

chrysalis1789: You're thrown clear by the explosion. You land about twenty feet away in the field.
Umbral Platypus: I think that was a sign
chrysalis1789: Tom immediately returns to Cailean and makes concerned flutterings around her head.
Umbral Platypus: maybe sludgy shouldn't come out and play
chrysalis1789: Both sluagh are bleeding from the ears.

dramadiva102: "Where did you get sludgy from"
Umbral Platypus: ::returns thermos to pocket::
Umbral Platypus: He was in a coffee pot in the kitchen
dramadiva102: "Holy God!! Did you know he ate through the sink??"
chrysalis1789: Sludgy burbles in Daniel's pocket.
Umbral Platypus: doesn't surprise me, he ate a spoon too.
chrysalis1789: Contented sludgy noises.
Umbral Platypus: But we made friends didn't we sludgy?

dramadiva102: "He's playing jig music on the harmonica. Someone should tell him he's a ghille du, don't you think?"
chrysalis1789: Cailean shrugs. "Why wouldn't he know? I know that I'm a daisy."
dramadiva102: "I think he's forgotten"
chrysalis1789: Cailean begins to look strangely floral.

Umbral Platypus: We could send two or three people to run around them while screaming... that would be distracting.

Umbral Platypus: am I like a faerie secret agent who lost my memory but they think I know vital secrets to overthrow their evil?
dramadiva102: "I doubt it. I think you're just a ghille du."

Umbral Platypus: WOOOO WTF!!! the dog just talked to me!
dramadiva102: "Well, he's your dog."

chrysalis1789: Cailean nods. "Distracting. That's where I'm a Viking."

dramadiva102: "You can talk to animals AND coffee?"

Draconius: ::signs:: "You guys go ahead and fly I’ll follow along on the ground. It's been too long since I've been with Epona"
chrysalis1789: ((It's been many long nights since I've lain with a horse!))
dramadiva102: ((how I miss that sweet pony lovin'))
chrysalis1789: ((That smell of oats and glue in the morning))

ChronicLunacy: Sorne: Can I be a balloon pirate?
chrysalis1789: Cailean glares at Sorne. "Shut up."
ChronicLunacy: Sorne: ::Takes out his scimitar and holds it between his teeth:: Yarr
dramadiva102: "Cailean's right. Shut-up. That joke got old in Maine"
ChronicLunacy: Sorne: Aw...
ChronicLunacy: Sorne: ::Puts scimitar away::

chrysalis1789: Follow the sluagh, kids.
dramadiva102: ::follows the sluagh::
Umbral Platypus: ::follows::
Umbral Platypus: conga line?
Draconius: ::follows the uhh... sluagh?::
dramadiva102: ::lyre starts playing conga music::

dramadiva102: "He's a troll silly. Don't you remember anything? You met him last night."
Umbral Platypus: oh... good to know
Umbral Platypus: He wasn't blue then
dramadiva102: "You weren't enchanted then"
Umbral Platypus: and you didn't have goat legs
chrysalis1789: Camera nods, "And I had teeth. It was nice."

dramadiva102: ::giggles:: "I wonder what the nocker flaw on dentures would be."
chrysalis1789: "Compulsive blow jobs."
Umbral Platypus: Those sound unpleasant

Draconius: "You BLUE ENNOBILIZED GIMME MY PHEONIX!!!! YOU SUCKING CUMGUZZLING NOBLE LOVING SWINE GIMME THE BALL OR I'LL CUT YOUR SAC OFF!!!"

Draconius: "I'm UNIONIZED. You can't touch me"

Umbral Platypus: ((bardic gift difficulty will-2 not to be made clam))
chrysalis1789: Clam!

ChronicLunacy: Valefor saved my life.
Draconius: "Can't say i would"
chrysalis1789: "Bad judgment on the bird's part?"

Umbral Platypus: I could have you cover your ears put the arguers to sleep and we could smoke up till they woke up.

A charming example of Stroud playing the ST…
ChronicLunacy: ::Slaps the harmonica out of Daniel's hand::
*OnlineHost*: Umbral Platypus rolled 1 10-sided die: 10
chrysalis1789: Like hell you slap the harmonica, bitch.
chrysalis1789: He got a ten. Camera, Rosi, and Balthasar are out.
ChronicLunacy: []Bull, I've got time to stop him.[]
dramadiva102: ((he got a ing 10, you're asleep before you get to him))
chrysalis1789: ST calls no contest. Camera, Rosi, Balthasar. You're down.

dramadiva102: ::follows Camera::
chrysalis1789: It's another game of follow the sluagh!
chrysalis1789: Around a rock! Between two stray trees! Over a creek!

Umbral Platypus: I sense a lot of hostility (take that empathy one)

dramadiva102: "Where are we going exactly?"
chrysalis1789: "North." ((no hag jokes, please.))

Camera and Philyra play an increasingly bizarre game of word association…
chrysalis1789: "Scale."
dramadiva102: "Piano"
chrysalis1789: "Elephant"
dramadiva102: "Cinderella"
chrysalis1789: "Beauty"
dramadiva102: "Couch"
chrysalis1789: "Warden"
dramadiva102: "telephone"

ChronicLunacy: []The phoenix is where?[]
chrysalis1789: "bullet"
Draconius: ::pockets the ball::
dramadiva102: "tooth"
chrysalis1789: Lying in a chicken heap at the side of the road.
Draconius: "dentist"
chrysalis1789: "None."
ChronicLunacy: Stop the car.
dramadiva102: "Novocain"
Draconius: "dentist"
chrysalis1789: "For the soul."
ChronicLunacy: Please, stop the car.
dramadiva102: "Chicken soup"
Draconius: "Broth"
ChronicLunacy: WILL SOMEONE PLEASE STOP THE CAR NOW?!?!?!?!
dramadiva102: "bowl"

Another round of “ the ST”…

ChronicLunacy: ::Opens a window, leaning out so he can blow the dog whistle without the sluagh going into a coma::
ChronicLunacy: ::Down the road a little ways, there is a bright flash like a fiery explosion, then the phoenix rises into the air and begins following the RV::
chrysalis1789: The phoenix isn't going to come flying, dumbest.
ChronicLunacy: []Why not?[]
chrysalis1789: You don't get to say when it sparks back up.
ChronicLunacy: []Why not?[]
chrysalis1789: Because it is, in fact, an NPC.

An exercise in profanity…
ChronicLunacy: []I take offense to being called profane words.[]
ChronicLunacy: []You used the word "bitch" to describe me before.[]
dramadiva102: ((you're joking. How do you hang out with us. Example…)
Draconius: oh lord get over it
dramadiva102: ((Robert, you're a ))
ChronicLunacy: []Please, don't do it anymore.[]
Draconius: Caroline you're a bitch
dramadiva102: ((and a ing ))
Draconius: you you
ChronicLunacy: []Thank you[]
chrysalis1789: You're both mother ers.
Draconius: ing who slept with my brother...
chrysalis1789: Anyway. I shouldn't have called you dumbass, even though prior to now I have in my life freely referred to all of my friends in profane terms. Okay. So you're still just a ...
chrysalis1789: ...and the phoenix is still a chicken.
dramadiva102: ((you can still call me a goddamn ing bitch when you want to 'Nanda))
chrysalis1789: ((Thanks, Caroline. You're my favorite goddamn ing bitch ever.))
Draconius: it never bothered me
Draconius: you

chrysalis1789: He still flames and I'm going to make the call that while extinguished, he can't fly in my World of Darkness.

Word association and emo…
dramadiva102: "clock tower"
chrysalis1789: "London"
dramadiva102: "bridge"
chrysalis1789: "is"
dramadiva102: "falling'
chrysalis1789: "down"
dramadiva102: "falling"
chrysalis1789: "down"
dramadiva102: "falling"
chrysalis1789: "down"
ChronicLunacy: ::Rubs the bridge of his nose and looks out the window.:: I hate my life.

Umbral Platypus: you could call him Joe
dramadiva102: "A nickname?"
chrysalis1789: "Ballsy."
dramadiva102: "Ballsy Joe?"

ChronicLunacy: []Phoenix?[]
Draconius: ((is doomed))
Umbral Platypus: ((squawk?))
ChronicLunacy: []Should be dry.[]
Draconius: Roadkill?
ChronicLunacy: []It's been a half hour.[]
Draconius: it got hit by a chimerical semi
ChronicLunacy: []Robert, go back IC.[]
Draconius: off Stroud
chrysalis1789: When it was doused, I deemed it "crippled." It'll take longer than half an hour.
chrysalis1789: If you bug me about the phoenix, I WILL hit it with a chimerical semi.
Umbral Platypus: ((lol I got this great picture of a chicken and a semi in my head))

ChronicLunacy: My name is Balthasar.
ChronicLunacy: Just call me that.
chrysalis1789: Camera, "Sir Ballsy Joe."
Umbral Platypus: or BJ for short ::yells into the van::
dramadiva102: "SBJ?"
ChronicLunacy: No
ChronicLunacy: Just Balthasar
Draconius: Small blow job?
chrysalis1789: Sloppy blow job

Philyra obliges with Sir Balthasar House Gwydion’s request that she not refer to him by his titles…
dramadiva102: "Sarcasm is just another form of lying Jimmy"
dramadiva102: "Blossom, why were you knighted?"
dramadiva102: "I drank some of Sludgy back at Si- Osbourne's house."
Draconius: "So milady.. when would you like my musicians to start their ::cough:: performance ::seductive eyebrow maneuver with wicked grin:: Since that's when you want them to arrive."
Umbral Platypus: ((what's a seductive eyebrow maneuver))
Umbral Platypus: ((sounds like the code name for a high school football team's supersecret play))

Draconius: ::smiles broadly:: "I'll go get the band. Maybe we can have a nice discussion later?"
dramadiva102: ((dodge seduction! dodge seduction!))

Umbral Platypus: Word up, my hobbit

dramadiva102: "What do they sell here?"
chrysalis1789: The eshu woman pipes up. "Prophylactics, oils, ropes, literature, candy."
dramadiva102: ::hopeful:: "Candy?"

Draconius: wander wander wander wander... hmm sluagh ass

Umbral Platypus: See I have this friend, Sludgy, I'm trying to figure out what he is.
Umbral Platypus: He claims to be coffee, but I don't believe him

chrysalis1789: Allendy writes on her slate "He's adorable. Injured and a little offended, though. He's missing a leg."
dramadiva102: ((ack! I drank it!))

OOC discussion of the Sabrina marathon going on while we gamed…
Umbral Platypus: ((why does her hair color keep changing and when did Sabrina go to college?))
dramadiva102: ((i think magic, and probably after high school))

Daniel makes his escape after consulting a with her mouth stitched who communicates via a chalk board…
chrysalis1789: Allendy smiles at you Daniel. The stitches on her mouth tug.
Umbral Platypus: Nice... chatting... with you. ::turns and walks to the bar::

ChronicLunacy: ::Scratches his nose and looks around.::
chrysalis1789: Troll, you hear out of the darkness, "You sure gots a purty mouth."

ChronicLunacy: ::Pulls a lighter out of his pocket and flicks it on::
chrysalis1789: Balthasar, in the dim light the lighter offers, you can see that you're about to become somebody's prison bitch.
ChronicLunacy: []Description?[]
ChronicLunacy: []Of the offender, not what he wants to do to me.[]

chrysalis1789: Camera blinks, "Why are we whispering? Well... I'm a sluagh. Why are you whispering?"

After Rosi announces that our band name is Flash Pot Filler, and it seems that Camera never realized his name was also a noun…
Draconius: "Look guys i needed a name to publicize. I took flash cause his name is camera, pot for dannyboy, and filler is kinda like Philyra. I needed a name."
chrysalis1789: "...flash? Camera? What?" Camera looks quite confused.
Draconius: "Camera flash... you know the flash on the camera..."
chrysalis1789: Camera still looks confused.

Words you never want to hear your ST say…
chrysalis1789: Have you ever seen "Deliverance," Stroud?

dramadiva102: "That is one of the worst band names I ever heard."
Umbral Platypus: how about Radioactive Coffee?
dramadiva102: "That's good. Tell her our name is Radioactive Coffee"
Umbral Platypus: Sludgy could be our mascot

chrysalis1789: Okay. Being prison bitched looks like a couple of bulky ogres wearing flannel shirts.

dramadiva102: "I drank some of Sludgy back at Si- Osbourne's house."
dramadiva102: "I'm not going to die am I?"
Umbral Platypus: I don't think so, but it did hurt his feelings
dramadiva102: "I didn't know it..he... was Sludgy. I thought he was yummy coffee."

We now interrupt your quote reading for a very long round of “ the ST” chrysalis1789: One of the ogres knocks you over the head with a club, Stroud.
ChronicLunacy: []Actually, I was asking about combat rounds since when he says "Right" he attacks the first ogre.[]
chrysalis1789: Well, that ogre just got two damage in on your head...
ChronicLunacy: ::Before the ogre can bring the club to bear, Balthasar kicks him in the balls.::
chrysalis1789: The ogre has balls of steel. He brings the club down on your head.
chrysalis1789: And you can't see what's going on unless you're going to continue keeping your lighter on.
ChronicLunacy: []3 damage for the ogre[]
chrysalis1789: Ogre doesn't care. There are more.
*OnlineHost*: chrysalis1789 rolled 9 10-sided dice: 8 5 3 5 5 7 1 9 9
chrysalis1789: Balthasar, two of the ogres now have you over a table. You can pass out now if you'd like.
ChronicLunacy: []Okay, simple male reaction on this one.[]
ChronicLunacy: []Kick in the balls=massive pain[]
Umbral Platypus: ((kill yourself?))
Draconius: not if he's a eunuch
ChronicLunacy: []I'm telling you what my character does when the first ogre meets him at the door.[]
ChronicLunacy: ::After the first ogre doubles over in pain, Balthasar takes his club and uses it to smash down the door.::
chrysalis1789: *stares*
dramadiva102: ((you're not the ST, balls of steel were said))
ChronicLunacy: []That's . My character is not getting d by Virgil, the redneck ogre.[]
chrysalis1789: They were going to play Parcheesi with you.

dramadiva102: ((your characters always get d by creepy things. Like harpies))

ChronicLunacy: []Reassure me that my character is not going to get d, and I'll calm down.[]
Draconius: your character is getting d
chrysalis1789: No. I'm not reassuring you anything. I'm giving Balthasar a huge rock from the sky to the head.

ST Nadia is a dark and a vengeful god… chrysalis1789: Okay. The hand of God has reached down from the sky, cast a giant ing boulder, and squished Balthasar to a little spot on the road.
chrysalis1789: If he ever comes back and stops being a douche, he can roll to soak damage.

chrysalis1789: The bartender grabs Rosi by the arm and drags him into the back room.
Draconius: ((mad sluagh loving))
chrysalis1789: Rosi, you've never properly appreciated the Sluagh birthrights before now.

dramadiva102: "Wow. If she thinks with the roadie counts as payment, there's going to be a problem"

chrysalis1789: Wow. You manage to resist the urge to grab somebody and them.
dramadiva102: ha!!
chrysalis1789: But you'll have to roll again repeatedly through the evening.
dramadiva102: damn

chrysalis1789: Through the magic of... well, magic... you kids are all playing the same Barry White song, only slightly off from one another.

chrysalis1789: TERRIBLE under-piano .

dramadiva102: ::getting nervous:: "Camera, why didn't you tell us you had friends here?"
dramadiva102: "Friends with pitchforks?"

Draconius: so what do i see?
chrysalis1789: Rosi, Camera is obviously leaving in a hurry. Philyra may be following him out. There's a woman who bears a close resemblance to Sue crying on a bench, and a who also looks like Sue comforting the teary one.
chrysalis1789: There are some locals with pitchforks, standing and looking menacing.
dramadiva102: ::Philyra is right on Camera's heels, eager to leave to place of menacing pitchforks::

Draconius: I'm feeling incredibly confident and i attempt to get the crowd's attention
chrysalis1789: Most of them are hissing " the bagpipes!"
Draconius: ...nm then
Draconius: I attempt to catch up to the band

chrysalis1789: Some people have reconciliatory , Camera dispenses reconciliatory information.

chrysalis1789: Minus one each for trying to usurp god, trying to usurp god again, having a bad attitude, and never having seen "Deliverance."

Session Four

Draconius: the RV is real world right?
chrysalis1789: No. The RV is chimerical, actually.
Draconius: that actually explains a lot
chrysalis1789: Like how we managed to fit the troll in there.

chrysalis1789: Camera hits the breaks sharply.
Draconius: ::faceplants on the floor of the RV::

Draconius: "Then we'll sic the sludgy on it. And i know i didn't do anything to mess with you.. actually... were you what i made in the coffee pot?"
chrysalis1789: Sludgy burbles. Daniel, to you it sounds like "Yeah. Coffee pot."
Umbral Platypus: Yes
Draconius: ::looks amazed:: "That means i'm a daddy... whoa that's way too deep for me.. So uhh sludgy wanna try and tackle those cold iron seams?"

Umbral Platypus: So we go in, unseam her and leave?
chrysalis1789: "That seems to be the short of it."
Draconius: "Seems like a plan... oh and i'm buying a 3 headed dog”
chrysalis1789: Camera gets out of the van. "A what?"

chrysalis1789: You guys see a rather large rock sitting in the middle of the road between a bar called The Rusty Zipper and Berkley's Curios. It's rather unassuming.
Draconius: "Well that's new"
Umbral Platypus: ::pokes rock::
chrysalis1789: The rock does not react.
Draconius: "Careful i heard tell of a rock that ate a redcap"

Draconius: "I'm here to help... We're here to help."
Draconius: "We've come to take the iron off your mouth."
Umbral Platypus: ::smiles and nods::
chrysalis1789: Allendy's eyes widen. She shuts the door.
Draconius: "Sludgy agreed to try and eat the iron if you'll allow him t-"
Draconius: ::turns to group:: "Well that went rather well"
Umbral Platypus: Yep...
Umbral Platypus: ::knocks on door::

Umbral Platypus: Meet Sludgy.
chrysalis1789: Sludgy burbles politely and undulates in a way that means he's either taking a bow or washing his ears.

Draconius: ((dude you can totally mack on the Sluagh))
Umbral Platypus: ((I've totally decided Daniel has a crush on Allendy))
Draconius: ((I've got a thing for Sue))
chrysalis1789: ((Aww!!))
Draconius: (not just )
chrysalis1789: ((I love sluagh!!))

Draconius: "He's catlike... that's new."
Umbral Platypus: No he's always like that if you aren't drinking his leg or pouring his family down pipes.

Ghille Du crushes are so cute… chrysalis1789: Allendy runs her fingers over her mouth. There's a series of little holes along her lips where the stitches used to be.
chrysalis1789: She smiles at Daniel.
chrysalis1789: It's sort of charming, in an overjoyed sluagh way.
Umbral Platypus: ::smiles back shyly::

Draconius: ::goes to look at the puppy see if there's a for sale sign and if so how much::

Draconius: ::hums how much is that puppy in the window::

Draconius: ::walks over to danny boy:: "Hey uhh daniel.. Can i... can i ask you a favor?"
Umbral Platypus: Shoot..
Draconius: "Can i borrow 300 gold?"
Umbral Platypus: I busk... for food... and weed....

chrysalis1789: Thaily shakes her head. "When the Lord finds out about this, we're all going to pay for it. That said, would you like any... reimbursement for the use of your... pet thing?"
chrysalis1789: Sludgy makes irritated burblings.
Draconius: ((The dog for rosi the dog for rosi!!!))
Umbral Platypus: No, I was happy to help.
Draconius: ((i leave to go make money to buy it and damn you will))
Draconius: ((quit being a in romantic and get me the dog!!!))
Draconius: ((::thwacks will upside the head with a pillow:: ))

Umbral Platypus: ::knocks on it:: Everyone ok back there?
chrysalis1789: Daniel, somebody throws something at the door. If a sluagh could shout, you're damn sure there would be shouting.
Umbral Platypus: ::steps back a couple of feet and bullrushes the door::
chrysalis1789: How much do you weigh, Daniel?
Umbral Platypus: 200, str of 4
chrysalis1789: The door shakes pretty heavily.
chrysalis1789: Something else is thrown at the door from the other side.
Umbral Platypus: :smashes into it again::
Draconius: believe will's gonna hit that door till it comes down
chrysalis1789: ...yeah, looks that way, doesn't it?

chrysalis1789: Strength plus... *thinks about knocking a door down* brawl?
Umbral Platypus: ok
Draconius: or if you have the door crushing ability
chrysalis1789: Strength plus brawl, difficulty seven.
*OnlineHost*: Umbral Platypus rolled 6 10-sided dice: 3 9 2 9 9 8
chrysalis1789: Wow.
chrysalis1789: Okay... so much for the door..

chrysalis1789: She throws a coffee mug in your direction, Daniel.
Draconius: ((dodge seduction!! wait...))

chrysalis1789: Rosi, your one hundred horseshoes got you twenty gold, a bag of peppermints, and a spare screwdriver in payment.
Draconius: hmm
Draconius: it's a start

Draconius: it's a 6 foot wing tip to wing tip when fully extended
Draconius: but they get bigger when ::cough cough:: you know
Umbral Platypus: (hot sluagh lovin'??)

chrysalis1789: Daniel, Camera is standing in the main part of the shop, a few feet away from the doorframe. He has Allendy's slate in one hand. He writes "DISTRACT THE BITCH" across it.

The titles of five books that Rosi stole at random from Berkley’s Curios…
chrysalis1789: Squeak and Squawk and Talk With the Animals... Primal for Novices
chrysalis1789: The Care and Keeping of Arachne
chrysalis1789: Why Puppies Eat People and Other Little-Known Animal Facts
Draconius: lol Puppies
Draconius: Phoenix care 102
chrysalis1789: Firebugs: Animals That Sizzle, Spark, and Flame
Draconius: awesome
chrysalis1789: 101 Recipes for Moldy Bread
Draconius: hmm sluagh cooking i'll totally be able to win over Sue

chrysalis1789: Diet and a description of common phoenix-related ailments... fiery wing mites, etc.
Draconius: Fiery wing mites.... i read that lil blurb
Draconius: then i start checking my wings
chrysalis1789: Your wings are mite-free.
Draconius: ok

chrysalis1789: Moldy Bread croutons, moldy French Toast, moldy fried bread...
Draconius: and flip through it while feeding the phoenix talking to the bird and in all intents and purposes trying to befriend it and let it know what happened
chrysalis1789: Moldy breadsticks
Draconius: hmm French toast
Draconius: i stop and read that.. next time i stay with sue i'm making her breakfast in bed
chrysalis1789: You're so sweet.

chrysalis1789: Camera gratefully accepts the driving offer and naps on the floor.
Draconius: I point out he can sleep with Philyra. she's already asleep and i heard they uhh had an intimate meeting earlier
chrysalis1789: Camera flips Rosi the bird.
Draconius: "What mate it's what i heard.."
chrysalis1789: "She molested me under a piano."
Draconius: "Ahh... that makes more sense. she is a satyr"

Draconius: i saved the day by using daniel and my son sludgy
chrysalis1789: He's not technically your son. You just happened to brew him while he was freeze-dried.
Draconius: ..so? i created him in a moment of passion
Draconius: it's like Frankenstein but nicer and not bent on killing me

chrysalis1789: So it's a three-legged coffee colored puddle kitten.
chrysalis1789: Named Sludgy.
chrysalis1789: Living in a thermos in a homeless guy's pocket.

Draconius: My eshuness can only be matched by an eshu
chrysalis1789: Good lord you people love subplot.

chrysalis1789: I dutifully reward subplot-whoring with xp.

chrysalis1789: My NPCs do have something called "motivation."
chrysalis1789: Even if all of them have the middle name "Plot Device" to go along with it.
chrysalis1789: Except Allendy. Allendy's middle name was "Shopkeeper."

Session Five

I swear this was a Red Stripe commercial once…
chrysalis1789: Philyra's in the top bunk.
Draconius:
chrysalis1789: Daniel and Allendy are in the bottom bunk.
Draconius:

dramadiva102: "Who's the new ?"
chrysalis1789: Camera shrugs. "Your replacement?"
dramadiva102: "She sings?"
Draconius: "She sings?"
chrysalis1789: "...actually, she's a sluagh. Probably not."
dramadiva102: "Then how would she replace me?"
chrysalis1789: "Never mind. Not your replacement. Rest easy."

Draconius: "Oh right Daniel I got a question for you."
chrysalis1789: Daniel's still asleep.
chrysalis1789: Dead asleep.
dramadiva102: "I think he's the one who's resting easy"

Draconius: "No i mean like fix it up. Sure it works fine but i mean like give us more room. Maybe a paint job"
chrysalis1789: "If you so much as paint new lines on this van, I will forcibly remove your testicles."
dramadiva102: "That means no"

dramadiva102: Camera had just threatened Rosi's testicles when God last disappeared
dramadiva102: time can resume now

The ST learns a lesson in choice of words… (no, it wasn’t dead)
chrysalis1789: Daniel, there's a body next to you.
chrysalis1789: It smells kind of like leaves.
Umbral Platypus: A dead body?

Stromy the Typo Demon makes me happy…
Umbral Platypus: ::scoots away from Allendy lushing a little::
chrysalis1789: Lushing? Hot.

dramadiva102: "Where are we going?"
dramadiva102: "I'm just asking because the best laid plans of mice and men tend to go all y, and this plan doesn't seem very well laid. Not boding well."

chrysalis1789: The puppy purrs.
chrysalis1789: .
chrysalis1789: Puppies don't purr.

chrysalis1789: There's an unconscious clurichan under the RV.
dramadiva102: "Ohmigod! Ohmigod! Ohmigod!"

Umbral Platypus: Calm down
dramadiva102: "Calm down???!!! I just killed Lucky!!!"

dramadiva102: ::sits on ground and hugs her knees::
dramadiva102: "Oh . Oh . Oh damn. Ohmigod."
Umbral Platypus: ::pats her shoulder:: if it makes you feel better his pot of gold is now free game

chrysalis1789: "You hit an Irishman. In my van."
dramadiva102: ::bursts into tears::

Umbral Platypus: If you help one they have to give you their pot of gold right?
Draconius: "Did you see his pot o gold somewhere?"
Draconius: "And i'm still sure he can sue us for hitting him with the RV"
Umbral Platypus: He's a leprachaun, he's got to have one somewhere, that or cereal.

Umbral Platypus: How you feeling?
ChronicLunacy: "Like I got hit with a truck, mate."
Umbral Platypus: RV
chrysalis1789: "This, sir, is a recreational vehicle. Not a truck."
Umbral Platypus: Not truck.
Umbral Platypus: ::nods sagely::

ChronicLunacy: "I've got some cereal in my bag..."
ChronicLunacy: "Not to play to stereotype or anything..."

ChronicLunacy: "And why is everything spinning?"
dramadiva102: "That's my fault. I hit you with a giant speeding RV. I'm sorry. I'm sorry"

I have a thing for dispensing of people via rocks from god…
Umbral Platypus has left the room.
chrysalis1789: ...Daniel gets hit in the head with a mysterious rock.

dramadiva102: "OHMIGOD!!! Someone else is dead!!!"
Draconius: ::goes out after the yelp for assistance::
ChronicLunacy: "Huh?" ::Tries to look, but falls off the bed.:: "Ow."

Draconius: in my equipment i now have "Rock of ST"

chrysalis1789: Camera blinks. "Did you knock Daniel out?"
dramadiva102: "No. Unless I'm just cursed, and thereby did so indirectly."

The act of senseless violence that earned Robert an extra xp…
Draconius: ::knocks her in the back of the head sap style to knock her out::
Draconius: ::with the ST rock::
chrysalis1789: Philyra... you've just been knocked out by Rosi...
dramadiva102: ::falls::
chrysalis1789: I'm gonna call this the blunt trauma session...

chrysalis1789: Camera's mumbling to himself about crazy woman drivers.

dramadiva102: "Why did you do that?"
Draconius: "Who was that directed at?" ::still reading::
dramadiva102: "You. Rosi. Wielder of rocks."

chrysalis1789: "Well... she did hit Lucky the Cereal Mascot."
chrysalis1789: "I'd be traumatized."
dramadiva102: ::eyes well up with tears, but doesn't actually start crying::
dramadiva102: "It's very upsetting to run down a figure in childhood memories"
chrysalis1789: Allendy rummages through her various pockets. She hands Philyra a plastic toy dinosaur, presumably to make her feel better.

ChronicLunacy: "At least I'm a happy stereotype."

ChronicLunacy: "Who's the wonderful who found my fiddle?"
dramadiva102: That's The New
ChronicLunacy: "The New ?"
dramadiva102: uh-huh
ChronicLunacy: "No name?"
dramadiva102: She probably has one

ChronicLunacy: "I guess this is a good time to mention I don't like tight spaces?"
dramadiva102: "So we should, what, install a deck?"
dramadiva102: "Actually, a deck would be kind of cool"

dramadiva102: "Isn't there still a giant poleax on top of the RV?"

chrysalis1789: "We've got a poleaxe up there. Watch the blade."

ChronicLunacy: "I think I'll just hang out on top. There's a...poleaxe up there.”

Draconius: it's an ST rock
Draconius: it might know something

chrysalis1789: God so did not tell you to knock out the satyr .

Session Six

chrysalis1789: ... . This bagel is one of the ones that isn't pre-split.
dramadiva102: damn...
Draconius: lol happens
dramadiva102: I hate working to chew my bagels
chrysalis1789: I found a natural fissure... this might work...

chrysalis1789: Robert has a fixation on Metagaming... the mythical art that enables a player to have effect upon or override the ST.
dramadiva102: that sounds like a bad idea
chrysalis1789: No kidding.
dramadiva102: STs have tendancys to strike back with heart attacks

chrysalis1789: Camera's humming Christmas songs, and he slams on the breaks.
chrysalis1789: Because he knows how not to run people over.
dramadiva102: ((ya well, he's probably watching to road. Loser))

dramadiva102: "What is with people around here and being in the road?"

chrysalis1789: "Because I want to be where they're not. Oh, the Smiling Doe is punishing us! Oh beloved quadruped, what have we done to offend thee!?!"

chrysalis1789: "Deer god?"
chrysalis1789: "You're not taking anybody's deity!"
dramadiva102: "If it's an actual God, good luck to you. You will almost certainly fail"

dramadiva102: "There are going to be serious issues if you kidnap a God"

Draconius: "And to that butterfly back at the balloon that Sluagh was a god"
dramadiva102: "That was a butterfly. They don't even have brains"
Draconius: "That was a boggan they don't have brains.."

chrysalis1789: Camera starts driving again AND I HAVE CREAM CHEESE ALL OVER MY KEYBOARD!
ChronicLunacy: ::Watches as the van drives off without him.::
ChronicLunacy: "Um..."
ChronicLunacy: ::Waves at it::

chrysalis1789: There's a dirt driveway up to a big cluster of farmhouses, a barn a little ways off, an orchard, and what looks like a mini-golf course.
chrysalis1789: There's a billboard off to one side. "DOES THE DOE SMILE ON YOU?"

chrysalis1789: "Look in need. We're in boggan territory."
Draconius: "::mutters:: ing frailty always ing us over..."

Draconius: ::watches the proceedings and waits for the foor to get open::
chrysalis1789: We don't open foors where I come from.
Draconius: off you make typos too
chrysalis1789: *middle finger of God*

dramadiva102: ::whispers to Camera, practically inaudiably, since he's a sluagh and all:: "You didn't mention a somewhat pushy cult"
chrysalis1789: *whispers to Philyra, practically inaudibly, since he's a sluagh and all* "I didn't know about the somewhat pushy cult!"

chrysalis1789: Camera shrugs. "Sandwiches and a bath couldn't hurt."
dramadiva102: ::whispering:: "unless they're laced with mass-suiciding cult-poison"
chrysalis1789: "I hear cult poison isn't too bad."
ChronicLunacy: "I've had worse."

dramadiva102: "We've been locked in by the cult!!"
ChronicLunacy: "Something tells me I should have seen this coming."

chrysalis1789: Woah, dark pagan magicks in the cult bathroom.

Draconius: so the cat is sitting inside the circle in the middle of the pentagram
chrysalis1789: The cat also thinks you're criminally insane.

dramadiva102: "Camera, do you have any ideas of what we should do now?"
chrysalis1789: "Wait for the end times."
dramadiva102: "A less resigned attitude would be nice now."

dramadiva102: "Camera, could you please try to help?"
chrysalis1789: "Help with what?"
dramadiva102: "Well, we are locked in by a scary cult. You could help think of ideas for escaping alive."

Sluagh are not the best people to be locked in a room with…
dramadiva102: "So, Camera, read any good books lately?"
chrysalis1789: "Hmm. Spiders, Friends or Enemies? wasn't bad."

Draconius: ::gets up furious at his failure and punches the mirror above the sink::
Draconius: "GODDAMMIT!!"
chrysalis1789: The mirror yelps.
chrysalis1789: !flesruoy nmad doG
Draconius: ...the fact that you typed that backwards that fast impresses me
chrysalis1789: I'm a talented God.

chrysalis1789: The mirrors here are a bit on the wyrd side.

chrysalis1789: Ouch. Plus one xp to you at the end of the session for catching the ST in a moment of blind ignorance.
chrysalis1789: Don't make a habit of it, though.

chrysalis1789: Camera shrugs. "It would be kind of anathema for a boggan to poison people in need."
dramadiva102: "Maybe they think they can best help us by curing us of this cursed life."

dramadiva102: "Hey! Camera! You want to play 'Cause the End of the World'?"
chrysalis1789: Camera raises his eyebrows. "Is this an escape plan?"
dramadiva102: "No. It's a word game."

Philyra and Camera end the world…
dramadiva102: "Ok.....a woman goes to the grocery store to buy some cheese."
chrysalis1789: "And her shopping cart has a loose wheel."
dramadiva102: "She is really annoyed by the wheel and not paying attention to where she's going."
chrysalis1789: "She runs into a display of... of apple juice."
dramadiva102: "The falling apple juice hits a passing bagboy on the head."
chrysalis1789: "The bagboy drops several cartons of eggs."
dramadiva102: "the manager slips in some of the broken eggs"

Draconius: ::gets out the Rock of the ST::
chrysalis1789: It shines with a holy light.
Draconius: "Saints preserve let's see if i can swing this"
chrysalis1789: *holy glow, holy glow*

Draconius: "Salamandra keep an eye out for cultists please dear"

Philyra and Camera continue to end the world…
dramadiva102: "Camera! It's your turn"
chrysalis1789: "Uh... sorry, brain freeze. The manager... hits the fire alarm."
dramadiva102: "Ok....the sprinkler system activates"
chrysalis1789: "One of those inflatable sponge dinosaurs gets soaked."
dramadiva102: "A passing child notices it and picks it up."
chrysalis1789: "It... uh, it transmits the Ebola virus."
dramadiva102: "Oh come on. That's too big an event."

chrysalis1789: It's electric, boogie woogie woogie.

Philyra and Camera end the world, Part 3
chrysalis1789: "Okay, okay. No Ebola. Umm... the common cold?" dramadiva102: "fine. The child's mother sues the supermarket chain for damages to her kid's health"
chrysalis1789: "The supermarket chain is forced to shut down."
dramadiva102: "Umm... there's a national uproar about pointless lawsuits"

Political banality onslaught in ending the world…
chrysalis1789: "Anyway. Uh... erupts."
dramadiva102: "From a lawsuit uproar?"
chrysalis1789: "Sure. Maybe the libertarians came to power."
chrysalis1789: Philyra, you and Camera both feel a banal twinge.
dramadiva102: "Ah. That's bad."
chrysalis1789: "Ow. My heart. Maybe... maybe we should stop talking about governments."
dramadiva102: "This game has never caused that before. Anyway, China, Great Britain, and France band together to intervene for the US."

Draconius: how close am i with the door?
Draconius: since i've been going strong for a deal of time
chrysalis1789: No change, Rosi.
Draconius: none of the screws have moved!?
chrysalis1789: Nope.
Draconius: and you opted not to mention this?!
chrysalis1789: You didn't ask.

Never let banality stand in the way of ending the world…
chrysalis1789: "Hmm. Okay, China and France argue about how best to intervene."
dramadiva102: "Great Britain tries to reason with the anarchists peacefully."
chrysalis1789: "...the anarchists consume Great Britain?"
dramadiva102: "I guess so. France, fearing for itself, destroys the chunnel."

chrysalis1789: Camera hauls Lucky out of the tub.
chrysalis1789: He's one hell of a prune-like leprechaun.

Arch-nemeses go head to head in Europe… to DESTROY the WORLD!
chrysalis1789: "Hmm. Uh... Germany... protests the chunnel destruction for environmental reasons."
dramadiva102: "France becomes defensive and sends messages along the lines of "screw you Germany, we're France, we don't care."
chrysalis1789: "Germany invades France. Again."
dramadiva102: "This time France is finally ready, and they fire nukes at Germany"

Draconius: ((japan nukes hiroshima))
chrysalis1789: Japan nukes Hiroshima??
Draconius: ..well yeah wouldn't you?

dramadiva102: ::tosses the robe to Camera::
chrysalis1789: Camera drapes it over Lucky, looking disgusted. "Is it true that size isn't everything?"
dramadiva102: "Sure it is."

A satyr, a sluagh, and the End of Days…
chrysalis1789: "Okay. Germany turns into a smoldering crater. Turkey is kind of offended by that and nukes France."
dramadiva102: "The anarchists unleash the U.S.'s store of nukes on targets they pull out of a hat"
chrysalis1789: "Western Civilization goes down the tubes..."
dramadiva102: "China, utterly disgusted, decides to contribute to the madness."

Draconius: so they took all my odds and ends?
chrysalis1789: Actually, those boggan s managed to castrate you in 1/3 the usual time...
Draconius: mother ers
Draconius: "They took everything.... ::growing angry:: I'm gonna kill them!"
chrysalis1789: Your voice is high and squeaky.
Draconius: ..you're kidding
chrysalis1789: Nope.
Draconius: they honestly castrated my character?
chrysalis1789: You'll live.

Draconius: ::rosi checks himself to see if the package is still there::
chrysalis1789: Pixilation appears and the word CENSORED, accompanied by a deer hoofprint picture.

The very end of the world…
dramadiva102: "Ok, so like I said, China nukes..... someone. Um. Russia."
chrysalis1789: "Russia barely feels China's nuke. It's like getting pinched to them. Ooo! Siberia."
chrysalis1789: "But Russia blows up the planet anyway."
chrysalis1789: "Don't with the tundra."
dramadiva102: "And that's how a woman going to buy cheese ended the world."
chrysalis1789: "Amen."

chrysalis1789: "We can stick you with Lucky and his amazing prune."

dramadiva102: "C'mon man, it'll be ok."
Draconius: ::sits up and looks furious and devastated at the same time at Philly:: "How are things gonna be ok!? How can they possibly be ok!?"
dramadiva102: "Camera and I just created a hypothetical situation in which a woman buying cheese ended the world. Things will be ok."

Draconius: I MEAN LOOK WHAT THEY DID TO ME!!!" ::opens white robe to reveal pixillation::
dramadiva102: "You stop that! The door's open. Let's go."
dramadiva102: "And......"
Draconius: "THAT'S NOT NORMAL!!!"
dramadiva102: "I....that probably passes"
chrysalis1789: Dancing, multicolored pixels.

Draconius: ::holds sally close full out tears bawling:: "i'm so sorry i'm so sorry"
chrysalis1789: Salamandra purrs.
Draconius: ::nuzzles the cat crying like a madman and rocking back and forth::
chrysalis1789: Camera looks at Philyra. "This is very creepy."

dramadiva102: ::mutters to Camera:: "Thank God. He was out there. I thought he was going to go all Of Mice and Men on this poor cat"

dramadiva102: "They put Daniel and Allendy in storage??"
dramadiva102: "That's sort of insulting"

chrysalis1789: Okay, kids.
chrysalis1789: We aren't doing any rescuing tonight.
dramadiva102: Awww....but Mom....!

Session Seven

There are, tragically, no quotes for session seven due to an error on the ST’s computer. That’s sad, because Daniel had a very humorous argument with a boggan woman about whether or not deer can smile, and Rosi torched a cultist compound.

Session Eight

Again, limited quotes, because this session was played live instead of on-line and nobody was serving as scribe.

“Am I the only one who sees the benefits in befriending death?”

“That man has no flesh.”
“You sluagh are so narrow-minded.”

“I’m looking for a still.”

“Do I smell weed?”

“Whatever he’s selling, I’m not interested.”

“We are getting out of here NOW!”

“Death, not to be rude, but this makes me uncomfortable.”

“Making sure the boggans don’t hurt the dogs or your cider?”
“…or, you know, the I have a crush on.”

“Weed wanted.” (Daniel’s want ad)

“Allendy darts into the wheel well with Sludgy.”
“I can picture her, wrapped around the axel…”

Talking about the sluagh in the wheel well…
“Tomorrow morning, let’s not forget she’s there.”

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