We emailed each other at least once a day. Chatted online whenever we could. She would go into the Backstreet Boys official chatroom on their site. I would usually be hanging in a different room talking with other fans. She'd instant message me and we'd be chatting while she was fielding questions. I always admired her in that regard, because I knew I could never do that. I got frustrated if I had more than two people chatting with me.
By May, we had seen each other only one other time and we both were getting restless. We wanted to see the other. So she flew me out to Florida for a week. She was a laying down new tracks for her next album that looked like it might come out late that fall. Also in the studio, mainly because their album was coming out in August, were the Backstreet Boys. Krystal really wanted me to meet them. She apparently couldn't stop talking about me. I flew out to Orlando on a Thursday and was staying at a hotel there in town that fortunately I wasn't paying for. There would have been no way I would have been able to afford it.
Krystal came and got me late that afternoon and after all the hugs and kisses in my room, we walked out together, our shoulders touching, trying not to draw attention to ourselves, even though we were both grinning ear to ear with happiness. We got to the recording studio and I was almost overjoyed that the Backstreet Boys were the only ones there. Krystal had obviously told them the truth about us because they were very pleased to meet me. "She won't shut up about you," AJ said to me when he pulled me into a hug upon meeting me.
I pulled away from him and asked him, "How are you doing?"
He obviously knew what I was talking about, replying, "Sober ten months now. And I've never been happier." I nodded at him.
Brian hugged me and said, "So you're a fan, huh?"
I nodded and told him, "And I'm trying not to cry."
"Please don't," he replied, as I started sniffing. He rolled his eyes at me as tears descended my cheeks.
"You just don't get it Brian," I commented. "I have been waiting for this day for a long time now. You were an angel sent to me right when I needed you."
When I said that, he suddenly softened, somewhat understanding what was going on. He pulled me back into his arms and hugged me a second time, this time just holding me while I cried a bit on his shoulder.
After I got my hugs all around, we all sat down for lunch together. "So you guys know the truth, huh?" I asked in between bites of my double quarter pounder with cheese from McDonalds.
"Yeah," Howie replied.
"When did you know?" Nick asked me.
I thought for a moment. When did I know? When did I know I was bi-sexual? When did I know I was in love with Krystal? It all blurred together. I finally answered, "When her album came out. It all hit me like a freight train. I knew then that I was not only in love with a woman, but that woman happened to be Krystal."
Krystal smiled and grabbed my hand under the table. "She confessed to me that she thought we'd never be together so she'd given up hope," she told them. I smiled at her.
"It wasn't so much that I had given up all hope in ever finding someone," I remarked, realizing the blank stares I was getting. "It was more of the same feeling I had about you guys. You know, I'd probably never be with her so better to just put her out of my mind and move on." With that they all nodded their understanding.
"But you got hit, huh?" AJ inquired.
"Yeah, hit big time," I confessed. I looked at each of them in turn before asking one big question that was weighing on my mind. "So, what are you guys' opinion on this?"
"What does our opinion matter?" Kevin asked back.
I looked at the ground beneath my feet for a long time before answering, "It just does."
"It doesn't bother us," Nick said quickly, almost a little too quickly for my liking.
"Yeah right Nick," I snorted. "Someone has got to have a problem with this."
"Why?" Howie asked. "I mean, I may not condone your actions but if you're happy, then sobeit."
I rolled my eyes at the Latino. "You sound like my mother."
"Does your mother know?" Kevin asked.
"Not yet," I admitted. "But neither she nor my father are going to have a problem with it."
"Have you two done the nasty yet?" AJ asked.
Krystal slugged him in the shoulder and said his name in a shocked tone, adding later, "Even if we had, we wouldn't tell you!"
Brian, who hadn't said a word throughout lunch, softly remarked, "I don't like it." Both Krystal and I stared at him. "It's...It's not that..." He sighed. I could tell he was searching for the right words. "Like Howie said, I don't condone your actions. I think it's wrong. I mean, the Lord made woman as man's companion, his life companion." I had a feeling that Brian was going to be quoting the Bible here real quick like. He didn't need to. I knew the scriptures he was going to reference. I had acquainted myself with them shortly after I had fallen for Krystal. "Do you remember what the Lord did to Sodom and Gomorrah?"
I rolled my eyes. "Yeah fire and brimstone. Brian, don't quote the Lord's Book to me. I know all the verses. I know that this isn't what the Lord intended for me, but then again He also gave us free will. I don't think He really knows who we will fall in love with."
"Well, I'm not comfortable with it. I mean, I like you and I consider Krystal a friend," Brian continued, "but I cannot agree with what you two are doing."
"You don't have to agree with it," Krystal informed. "All I'm asking you to do is support me in this decision. Be there if I need someone to talk to about relationship stuff. Especially if we ever go public with this."
Brian closed his eyes and thought about what he was going to say next. "I think I can do that."
Krystal pushed her chair back suddenly and walked over behind Brian. Grabbing him by the back of the collar of his shirt, she lifted him out of his chair. This shocked me. "You think you can do that?" she said almost angrily, turning him around.
Brian looked terrified and this little exchange was beginning to scare me. "Okay okay, I can do it," he pleaded.
"Who's the Supergirl here?" Krystal asked, getting up as far into Brian's face as she could.
Brian reached over and patted Krystal on the head, replying, "You are Krystal."
I didn't realize it was a gag with them. I must have sat there staring for too long, because AJ leaned over and whispered in my ear, "Don't worry. They're always like this."
