December 27, 2007 2:12 PM

He was thoroughly and completely bored.

If this was what being human was all about, Angel thought, he was at the point of rethinking it. Angel leaned further into the chair and swung his feet onto the ottoman. He smiled at Spike’s frown. Revenge could be sweet. He knew that Spike and Max had spent the holiday trying to make him uncomfortable or embarrass him. Like getting him drunk and singing Mandy before talking him into playing football. So, taking over Spike’s favorite chair for the day was a deliberate act of irritating his Childe and getting back some of his own. Now, if he wasn’t ready to rip his own flesh off to relieve the boredom, he’d be fine.

Max had returned to Atlanta the day after Christmas which had been a relief. The other man was slowly being accepted but he still had to prove himself to Angel as being trustworthy. So, today he was in the company of Xander who had taken the week off to be with his family. This was one human he didn’t think he could ever be really comfortable with. Too much water under the bridge and although he was best friends with Spike and Buffy the past wasn’t something he was ready to let go of yet. But he figured Xander felt the same about him so they tolerated each other for the sake of everyone else.

Cordelia and Anya had taken Buffy out to lunch and to the salon for some much needed pampering. His Cordy could handle Buffy and didn’t seem to care when the Slayer started speaking in something resembling tongues. After all the things that his wife had been through a little insanity was a piece of cake. Anya was the same way. Centuries of dealing with human oddities and she’d point blank tell someone off if they tried to treat Buffy differently. It was getting Buffy out the door that had been dramatic. She didn’t want to leave Spike and since they had gotten her in the car was calling every chance she got to make sure he was still there. Angel had to admit Spike was handling it extremely well. He’d calmly talk to her, tell her he missed her and couldn’t wait for her to come home and then repeat it the next time she called.

That left the three of them sitting around the living room watching some movie with that Swedish guy while his two companions tried to out belch each other. Aidan and Elijah were playing in the dining room and Angel could hear their childish plans as they marked out who was going to play what role. Tuning out the other two he listened to the small boys. He loved the kids in the family even though being around them reminded him how much he had missed with Connor. But then that was maybe why he did love them so much.

“No, Queen Darla is mean. You can’t play her nice,” Elijah insisted.

Angel glanced at Xander and Spike but apparently they hadn’t heard. Without saying a word he made his way to the dining room trying to catch some more of the conversation.

“Prince William is a fool but he’s good, if you want to play someone nice,” Elijah explained.

“They all mean. They hurt de oders,” Aiden complained.

“Only cuz they gotta eat. You eat cows don’t ya?”

Angel shivered as he listened to the boys map out a game based on his and Spike’s life. His first thought was who had told them about those days and for what reason. He slipped into the room and sat beside them. Between them were action figures and two Barbie dolls that Elijah had gotten for Christmas. Buffy had insisted that she was giving her son equal opportunities and even in war there were woman now. And, of course, the word Slayer had been slipped in her defense somewhere. It was only now as he looked at them that he realized that one doll was blonde and one brunette. For Darla and Drusilla?

“What are you playing?” Angel asked.

“King Angel’s Court,” Elijah answered.

“I don’t like playing it. They mean,” Aidan said.

Elijah laughed, “You mean. King Angel is Great-grandpa.” His small hand patted Angel’s knee.

“He’s King Angel?” Aidan asked, his eyes growing bigger in fear. “You killed all dos people?”

The boy didn’t wait for an answer. He ran from the room as fast as he could. Angel watched him until he threw himself into his father’s arms.

“What’s going on?” Spike asked, sitting on the floor and scooping up Elijah who had joined Aidan in crying.

“I’m in trouble. Mummy told me not to play with anyone else. Please, don’t tell her.”

“Shh, calm down and tell me what’s going on,” Spike said, holding tighter as his son burrowed against him.

“Its okay, Eli,” Angel said. “You’re not going to be in trouble.”

Frightened gray eyes looked out at Angel from his father’s protective embrace. He smiled and ran his fingers through Eli’s hair trying to calm him down. Until the child felt safe he wasn’t going to get any answers. He glanced up at Spike who was looking as confused as he was.

“Did Mummy tell you that I was your great-grandpa?”

“Because Daddy’s mummy was made by you,” Eli explained with a nod.

“Mummy teach you to play this game?”

“We play all the time but she said it’s our secret. I wasn’t supposed to tell but I wanted to play and she wasn’t here.”

“I know,” Spike said. “You’re not in trouble for telling Daddy. Are there any more secrets that you and Mummy share? Things maybe I need to know.”

“Then they won’t be secrets.”

“Yeah, but you know that Mummy doesn’t feel well and maybe if I know these secrets then I can help her more.”

Anything Elijah might have been persuaded into telling them was lost as the door opened and the women returned. The boy wrapped his arms tighter around his father when Buffy appeared at the door.

“What’s going on?” Buffy asked.

December 27, 2007 2:35 PM

Spike glanced at his Sire and without a word a mutual decision was made to drop the subject. It could be brought up again later when things were calmer. Elijah despite his fears had other ideas.

“I’m sorry, Mummy,” the boy cried. “I didn’t mean to tell.”

“Tell what?”

“The game. They know ‘bout the game.”

Buffy looked panicked for a moment but like a mask sliding over her features, her emotions were quickly hidden. She coolly stepped into the room and knelt by her son.

“Its okay, Eli, it’s just a silly game that’s all.”

Spike didn’t believe her. She was trying to get them to forget about it and it amazed him that she was able to be so conniving over it.

“Cordy,” Spike said, “Why don’t you and Anya take the boys outside to play for a little while?”

It took a little coaxing before Elijah would leave. He sidled past his mother with a look of trepidation in his eyes but once he was past her, he ran to his Uncle Xander. No one said anything until they heard the back door close. Xander returned and stood on the other side of Buffy. She was glancing at the three men who surrounded her with contempt.

“What is this gang up on Buffy day? Well, play by yourself; I’m going to take a nap.”

Spike reached for her hand. All he wanted to do was to talk to her but she started walking backwards.

“It’s okay, Pet, we’re not going to gang up on you. I just want to find out about this game you’re playing with Elijah, that’s all.”

“It’s just a game,” she defended, with a wave of her hand. “Fantasy situations, kings and queens, stuff like that.”

“Eli said it was called King Angel’s Court,” Angel said, “and the names are from my family.”

“So, they’re just names,” Buffy said, still inching backwards toward the stairs. “Leave me alone. What are you going to do beat some damn story out of me that will satisfy your morbid curiosity?”

“Buf, look,” Xander said, “I know maybe to you it’s just a game but it scared Aidan when he found out that the King Angel in the game was Deadboy over there. And I admit he’s going to find out about vampires and stuff sooner than most kids but I wasn’t quite ready for him to know that yet.”

“No, of course not,” Buffy hissed. “You should just wait until someone eats him up like the tender little snack he’d be.”

By this time she had reached the bottom of the stairs and with one last look of scorn, Buffy turned and marched upstairs. Xander looked like he was going to be sick as he stared in disbelief as his friend disappeared.

“Xander, I’m…” Spike started.

“No, don’t apologize for her, I understand, she’s ill and we did, whether we want to admit it or not, we did gang up on her.” Xander said. “It’s just that up till now I’ve managed to avoid that tongue of hers and I was kinda hoping I would.”

“I need to go and see to her.”

“Spike, man, don’t worry about it. Go and do what you need to do,” Xander replied. “I’m going to take my family and head on home. Give you all some room, okay?”

There wasn’t anything else to say so Spike just nodded. Their friendship was deep enough that sometimes words weren’t necessary and without saying anything else he went to find Buffy. She was sitting on the bed when he entered their room and gave him a cursory glance before looking away. Spike sighed, sitting beside her and rubbing his forehead as he tried to figure out how to talk to her without making things worse.

“Have you come to tell me how disappointed in me you are?” Buffy asked. “If you have I’m not really interested in hearing it.”

“Actually I came to make sure you were all right.”

“Really? You lead this interrogation against me. Embarrass me in front of our friends. See how bad my wife is. Send your children away. She’ll corrupt them.”

The shimmer of tears in her eyes told Spike how hurt she really was. He ran his fingers over the lock of hair that hung in her face before tucking it behind her ear. There was such a fine line for him to walk, protecting her and watching out for everyone else

“I’m sorry if you felt that I was trying to embarrass you. I wasn’t.” Spike covered her hand with his. “I was just trying to find out about this game that you play with Elijah. It caught us by surprise and,” he laughed, “Aidan was frightened when he found out that Angel was King Angel.”

“Like I said before,” Buffy said, snatching her hand away, “It’s just a silly game. Elijah hasn’t had a problem with it.”

“Buffy,” Spike said, cupping her face and tried to gentle his words. “I don’t think it’s a good idea for Eli to be playing games like that. It’s a little much for a five-year-old to understand even one that has his history and his abilities.”

“Fine, I’m wrong. If I’m so bad for our child, why don’t you go ahead and lock me away?”

Buffy pulled away from him and rolled over onto her side.

“Baby, I’ve told you before, I’m not going to put you away; no matter what happens.”

Spike massaged her hip hoping that she would stop being defensive and talk to him but she pushed his hand away.

“Leave me alone.”

There wasn’t anything else he could do. Spike left her alone.

December 27, 2007 7:56 PM

Between them was a bottle of whiskey, two glasses and over a century of being family. And as much as they had hated each other, they loved each other just as much. Spike was just now coming to realize that but pride was funny when it came to such things. It could hurt you as much as help and he was at the point where his pride was going to have to take a backseat to the rest of his life. Those brown eyes studied him, those very eyes he had cursed when they were cruel or had cried out for when they were warm in passion. Friends, he had never called them that. There wasn’t really any word that covered their relationship except family. Because family was always there, in good times and bad times, whether you were down on your luck or on top of the world, and mostly when you were somewhere in between. And even when they were half a world apart, Angel was always with him.

“The day is going to come when you are going to have to make some decisions,” his sire said, his tone hesitant.

“I know,” Spike said and raised his glass, downing its contents, “but today isn’t the day.”

They both turned their heads at the soft cry emitted through the baby monitor on the desk. The other piece was sitting on the nightstand next to Buffy upstairs. Knowing he couldn’t be with her, the monitor was the next closest thing. His wife was never to be left alone. Only when the soft cry turned to a sigh and the sounds of rustling covers signaled Buffy changing positions did Spike relax. Brown eyes met with blue and looked away; still uncomfortable with the changes in their relationship.

“It hurts, Angel, I’m so scared that I am going to lose her forever,” Spike confessed. “She is the one that has held all of this together.” His hand gestured toward the house, encompassing his life and their family in that small hopeless movement. “I don’t know if I can.”

“You never have thought you were as strong as you are.” Angel said. “You’ll do what needs to be done like you always have. Hell, I made Dru and I couldn’t handle her like you could.”

It was Angel’s turn to take a drink as Spike watched. It was true. His sire didn’t have the patience to deal with Drusilla in her moods. Angelus had only wanted to play with her and receive her adoration but didn’t want to handle the madness that his Childe lived in. And if Spike was honest, Buffy’s problems also started with Angel. Her first disappointments and hurts received at his hand that had left her fragile and unable to cope with the biggest hurts that were laid at her feet. And again, Spike was left with the emotional damage caused by Angel.

“How is she?”

Guilt filtered over the brunette’s face at the question. For over a year now, by mutual decision and cowardice, Drusilla remained the prisoner of them both. Held in a chateau in France and guarded by well paid demons to keep her from the killing fields and to protect her from her ever increasing madness.

“She’s fine. She refuses to come to the phone and talk to me.” Angel looked up. “You should try.”

“No, we should let her go. Free her from this.”

“Spike, she doesn’t know what is going on. Merle says she lives in a world of her own creation now. There haven’t been any more rational moments.”

Neither one of them had gone to see her. It had been Wesley that had responded to the urgent plea from Drusilla for help. She had sent a message to Spike again and they had sent Wesley and Gunn to find her. They were the ones to set up her confinement because her only remaining family couldn’t deal with it. The two had blinded themselves to their responsibilities and locked her away when they should have ended it there.

“Send them back and have them take care of her.” Spike said.

“Isn’t that a bit cruel? For strangers to…”

“Are you suggesting that we go and do it? Or have her shipped here? I could open my own asylum. The House of Refuge for Angel’s Cast Offs.”

“King Angel’s Court, come and see the merry mad maidens.”

Brutal truth made into jokes by two men lost in their own confusion and pain. Neither laughed and instead both wanted to cry.

“Angel, it needs to be done.”

“And if you can make one decision and follow it through then when the time comes again, it might be easier?”

“Don’t think I could ever let Buffy go. No matter how bad she gets. She doesn’t deserve this, Angel. She deserves death like a true warrior—or to live a long and healthy life with plenty of stories to tell her grandkids. Anything but this.”

“Like she had before or what she hoped to have.” Angel poured them both another shot. “To the women we have loved,” Angel toasted.

“To the women we have shared,” Spike completed.

The whiskey was downed and a smile was passed between them.

“I’ll start to make arrangements,” Angel said.

Spike nodded. Drusilla would finally be freed from her madness and he would carry one less load of guilt and burden of responsibility. He didn’t even realize he was sobbing until Angel pulled him into his arms. And for what seemed the first time he felt the father’s love from his Sire.

December 29, 2007 5:42 PM

The house was quiet. Buffy was reading while curled on the couch in Spike’s study while he played on the computer. The woman that controlled his world had been a little more closed off since the day the game had been discovered. It hadn’t been brought up again by either of them. However, Elijah had been consoled by both of them and Buffy had reassured him that he wasn’t in trouble. Spike cast a glance at his wife as she shifted positions and once assured that she was all right, he turned his attention back to his monitor. His mind kept wandering as he tried to put together the puzzle in his mind. The vampire references were getting to be eerie and with the game added onto it, there was something screaming at him but he couldn’t quite hear it. Angel was as clueless as he was.

So, lost in his thoughts, Spike jumped when the phone shrilly broke the silence.

“Hello,” he answered.

“Hey, it’s me,” Max said. “Listen, I don’t have much time.”

“Okay.”

Spike gave a quick, reassuring smile to Buffy when she looked over to see who was on the phone. She smiled back and not really interested anymore, she returned to her magazine.

“Nikki came back from her vacation this morning. Someone broke into her apartment while she was gone.”

“What does this have to do with me?”

“It has to do with you. A lot to do with you from the way it looks. Nothing was stolen but whoever it was vandalized the place. Her lingerie was shredded and left on the bed. One of her pictures had the eyes gouged out. And,” Max hesitated. “Someone wrote on the wall in the bedroom, ‘He’s Mine’ in blood. Human blood.”

“Was it the stalker?” Spike asked. His voice was casual almost as if he was disinterested but everything inside of him was fearful of what he would hear next. Buffy looked at him intently. There was no mistaking the tension on her face or the stiffness of her body and Spike turned away from her and lowered his voice. “Was there a body? Or do they know where…the blood came from?”

“No, no body has been linked to it yet but they’re running the blood against the DNA from all the murders in the past few weeks to find a link. Listen, I’m not allowed to work the case because of my association with you.”

“What does that have to do with anything? You know the situation with the stalker more than anyone.”

“That’s the thing. Not only is she a suspect but so is Buffy.”

“Buffy? That’s ridiculous. There is no way she could be involved. You told them that it was impossible, didn’t you? She’s never alone much less able to fly to Jacksonville to do this.”

“They have the copies of everything about the stalker case including Buffy’s condition but it’s not going to clear her. Actually because of her deteriorating mental condition they think it’s more likely that she was behind it. They think she may have hired someone to do it for her.”

“That’s ludicrous,” Spike exclaimed.

“Is it?”

All it would take was one phone call. One moment of freedom and Buffy could do it. Spike studied his wife for a moment. She returned his gaze waiting for him to explain the call and his gut tightened. He didn’t think she had done it but there was the opportunity and the motive. And the opportunity came with witnesses that he couldn’t refute. The clerk that sold her the milk along with the surveillance camera and well, the motive was too simple to ignore. And that’s all it would take for them to arrest his wife. Arrest her and put her away where he couldn’t protect her anymore.

“They are going to a judge tonight to get the warrant to pull your bank accounts. I have to go.”

The phone clicked in his ear. Max was gone. He had dropped this bombshell and disappeared. It took a moment for Spike to realize what had happened. Max was going against orders to fill him in. He was risking his career to give them time to make sure that Buffy was safe. He hung up the phone and clicked on his bank’s website.

“What’s going on, Spike?”

“Give me just a second, Love, to check on something.”

Buffy returned to her magazine while he went over their bank records. And after a quick search, he found the final damning evidence. Two checks with large amounts made out to cash from the household account. What the hell was he going to do? The answer was simple. He would do whatever he had to do to keep her with him. But first he had to find out what truth he could and then take it from there. He sat on the table in front of her, taking her hands in his and letting his thumbs caress her flesh.

“Buffy, you wrote two checks from the household account. One was for $2,500 and the other for $3,000. Do you remember what they were for?”

Her brows furrowed together. “The one for $2,500 was for your Christmas present. I don’t know about the other one.”

“Sweetheart, you wrote the check. Don’t you remember?”

“It had to be for Christmas. Why is this important?”

Because your life depends on it, he thought with a sigh. “I need you to try to remember what it was for. It’s a pretty large amount and I haven’t seen anything new around here that would cost that much.”

Spike hated pushing her but he couldn’t take care of her if he didn’t know what he had to hide. And when her face crumpled in defeat, he wanted to hurt something, anything to take that look away. Buffy wrapped her arms around him, clutching at him in desperation as she hid her face against his neck. It was heartbreaking as he moved onto the couch, bringing her with him so that she was on his lap.

“I don’t remember, Spike. If you say I wrote the check I believe you but I don’t remember what I did with it.” Buffy played with a button on his shirt and her voice dropped to a bare whisper. “I lied.”

“What did you lie about?”

“I lied about the game. I know I play with Elijah and I remember bits and pieces of the game but I don’t remember teaching him about the four of you. I keep losing larger and larger pieces of my days and it seems like I’m living in a fog or I just don’t remember.”

“It’s okay,” Spike reassured her. “We’re not going to worry about things that we can’t do anything about and only take care of what we can.”

It wouldn’t do any good to question her about what had happened. All he could do was make sure she had strong alibis. With as much patience as he could, Spike spent the next few minutes calming her down before sending her to find the kids. As soon as the door closed behind her, he called Angel. His Sire picked the phone up on the second ring.

“Angel, hey, something has come up and I am going to need copies of those receipts,” Spike said without preamble.

“Uh, okay, sure.”

Spike relayed the details of his conversation with Max. “Yeah, so, I’m going to need copies of those so when they ask any questions, I can show them what Buffy used the money for.”

“No problem. I can fax them to you.”

“That would be great,” Spike answered and then in rusty Fyarl just in case someone was listening, “I need one for $2,500 and one for $3,000 and they need to be verifiable.”

Angel promised to have them to him by the next day and relief flooded Spike’s system. It was going to be all right. He wasn’t alone and Buffy was going to be safe. It was later that night when he was holding his wife tight that he felt it. The adrenaline rush of taking care of things was gone when it overwhelmed him. It rushed through his system like lightening, tearing at his gut and twisting his bowels, and breathing was something he had to remind himself to do as the guilt for what he had done slammed into him. This was his fault. He had been weak and because of it Buffy and his family were now vulnerable. Angry and ashamed, he buried his face in her hair and tried to deal with the feelings flooding through him.

to be continued…
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