Lights in Summer

Summer had not been lighthearted in years, but lately, things had been getting too bad for the situation to be ignored anymore. If he couldn't find something to give him some comfort soon, he was going to go insane with the loneliness. Friendship hadn't been enough; family hadn't. Every minute of every day ached with the awareness that something was missing, the spot where it should have been brimming with an emptiness that wouldn't go away no matter what anyone did. Little things-like sunlight on the grass, flowers blooming in the garden, the apples coming into season, things that should be shared-could send him into deep moods, in which he could neither think of nor feel anything but the emptiness. He knew that it was childish; he knew that it hurt his family and his best friend when he rejected them, but he couldn't help himself. Familial love wasn't what he needed.

But he hadn't expected this when he said that to Jessamine.

"I... I can't," he said again, despairing of ever getting the blush out of his face. "You're not... you're just not."

"But I don't want to be," Jessamine said patiently, wearing his 'it's really a good idea, you'll see once you get past the sheer oddity of it' face. "I just want to help you, and nothing else seems to be working. I think it's something you need. Day doesn't mind at all, and I don't either, and I promise it won't change anything." He smiled. "It's not like I want to marry you! We don't even have to go all the way if you don't want to."

"But..." Summer said a fourth time, feeling lame. "That's just... weird."

"What? Don't tell me you didn't want to sleep with Day when I first met him," Jessamine teased, grinning. "I saw you drooling in corners, you can't fool me. You were just too shy to ask."

The blush upped itself a few degrees. "I don't... I..."

"Well, spit it out. Yes or no?" the older cub-bearer prompted.

Summer sighed and thought about it.

"Alright. When?"

"Okay, now first we have to all get naked. It's not fair otherwise," Jessamine instructed, flopping onto the bed and starting to pull his top off. "Pull the curtains, Day, Summer doesn't want the birds watching."

Smiling in that particularly gentle way of his, Day obeyed, the blond fabric rustling under his hands. Summer sat gingerly down next to Jessamine, tucking himself unconsciously close for a safety that Day, frighteningly male, did not provide. He wasn't exactly scared of Day, but Day was a husband, and it was unsettling to be in a bedroom with him. Even more unsettling was the bubbling excitement raising goosebumps on his skin, the almost childish anticipation of something that could soothe the need he had been carrying for so long now and maybe even give him comfort on the night he finally did find someone. Think of it as schooling, Jess had said. Summer was having trouble thinking of it in any context at all.

"I - You're sure?" he stammered one last time, almost but not quite hopeful that Jessamine would change his mind and let him go home. Jessamine had no such intentions. Nodding firmly, the older cub-bearer slid out of his pants, half-folding them into a heap on the floor, and started into Summer's shirt buttons without so much as a blush. Summer blushed for him.

He wasn't wearing underwear.

Feeling ridiculously self-conscious and trying at the same time not to sneak peeks at the long and rather enviable legs trailing off the bed(not to mention other things far more interesting and certainly more forbidden), Summer was still not distracted enough to miss Day sitting down behind him and starting motions that Summer just knew were his clothes going. He concentrated carefully on the movement of his buttons popping free one by one instead, moved by nimble fingers so familiar and impossibly alien at the same time. How on earth had he gotten into this? Had he finally gone mad? Or maybe it was Jessamine who had gone mad... And what was Jessamine doing with his hands?

"I can do it," Summer squeaked quickly, pulling the zipper of his jeans safely out of Jessamine's reach. He didn't deny that it had felt good, having Jessamine's hands down there, but it was still so weird...

Jessamine, thankfully, didn't laugh, just smiled softly and kissed him on the ear and let him do it himself.

Finished, Summer slid the jeans shyly down his legs and kicked them off, pulling his knees up a little to cover himself. He was grateful when Jessamine tugged him onto the bed without looking, shoving down the covers and shooing Day into the other side. "Spoon against me like this," he instructed, "and Day can face you." He dropped another kiss, this time on Summer's neck. "It's ok to be nervous, Summer, but you don't have to be so scared. We won't do anything you don't want us to, I promise. Alright?"

A deep breath. "Okay. What-where do we start then?"

"Why don't you let Day show you," Jessamine told him, lips curving. "He won't bite."

"Alright," Summer mumbled, blushing again and sending Day an apologetic look from under his eyelashes. A smile creeping into his eyes, Day leaned down and kissed him. Not a soul-searing kiss maybe, but much better than Summer could have managed, he was sure. They explored each other for a very long and pleasing time-Summer tentative, Day firm and decided yet careful of going too far. It was messy at first, Summer flustered and blushing around the edges, but gradually their mouths began to move more in unison, and by that time it had become what Summer was sure he could safely label a very good kiss.

Then Jessamine began playing his fingertips across the sensitive skin on the insides of Summer's thighs and it became lots better than just good. The noise that escaped into Day's mouth was half surprise, half pleasure, and Summer had to break away from Day long enough to drag in a quivery, calming breath. His head drooped against Day's chest as he concentrated on the feelings his friend's touch was causing him.

"You like that," Jessamine murmured against his earlobe, thankfully not making it a question that Summer might have to answer, because Summer wasn't sure that he could talk at all through the strange heat that was stealing the breath from his lungs. Day had moved his hand down too and was now kneading the soft swell around Summer's bellybutton with the heel of it, creating a strangely gratifying tingle that sluiced rapidly downwards to settle in near Jessamine's stroking fingers. Abashed, Summer made an abortive movement with his knees, instinctively trying to hide the new development.

Jessamine tucked his nose in the joint between the other cub-bearer's neck and collarbones, kissing lightly. "There's nothing to be ashamed of," he soothed gently. "This is supposed to be for your enjoyment, so if you're not enjoying it we can stop. Neither of us will mind, really."

Summer shook his head quickly. "I don't want to stop. I am-enjoying it." He blushed harder, but turned into the kisses to prove himself. "I'm just... really nervous. Maybe if we went faster I could get into it a little more."

"You just don't want to have to make decisions," Jessamine teased. Then he paused.

"Hey Summer, would you mind if we tried something... a little unorthodox?"

"Like what?"

"Like taking away a lot of the decisions so you can really concentrate on feeling. I remember that my first time out of season I was a little nervous, because I didn't know a lot of what I was supposed to be doing. If we do this, you wouldn't have to feel like there was something you should be doing when there's not."

"What is it?" Summer asked slowly, a mixture of hesitation and the desire to feel freer fluttering in his throat. Jessamine grinned.

"Tie you up. Look, I'll show you." He slipped off the bed and returned with a length of soft, flat white rope, which he seemed to have dug out of the closet. "It doesn't hurt, and it made me feel a lot better at first. And if we start something you're uncomfortable with, you can just say no and we'll stop right away, I swear."

"Jessamine and I have done it before many times, so we know what to do. But you would have to trust us," Day added, pressing his palm into Summer's bracingly. "Do you want to try? You don't have to, we can go on the way we are now if you would prefer. Only if you want to."

Summer surprised himself by smiling. "A human thing?"

Jessamine smiled back, looking highly relieved. "Hey, humans come up with really good ideas sometimes. We don't give them as much credit as they deserve.

"So, what do you say?"

Summer paused. "Nobody will walk in on us, will they?" he asked meekly after a moment, fidgeting with Day's fingers.

Day made a sound that was almost a snort. "Into our bedroom? Not probably."

"Just making sure." Slowly, he nodded. "Alright, tie me up then."

"You say that like you're offering yourself up for sacrifice," Jessamine teased, taking hold of his best friend's wrists and wrapping them in the surprisingly soft and pliable rope. "It's not that bad. Day, run this down to his ankles please."

Laying a kiss on his husband's lips, Day did so, lacing the end of the rope that was not now binding both of Summer's wrists to the headboard down to wrap his ankles together and draw them back until his knees were bent double, both heels resting snugly against his bottom. The soft, silky pressure of the rope against his skin was actually rather soothing.

Curled comfortably around Summer's body, his breaths a light draft over the younger Kindred's right ear, Jessamine began a slow rhythm, one hand brushing through ivory-white hair and the other making everwidening circles on Summer's bared chest. He was the one to take up the kissing now, his mouth softer and strangely sweeter than Day's had been as well as being far more insistent and daring with his tongue. Summer had never been sure why tongue was supposed to make a kiss better-in theory it had always sounded disgusting.

Theory, it turned out, was one thing, but reality was entirely another.

The ache centered between his thighs grew worse as something wet, presumably Day's mouth, descended on the junction of one thigh and his torso and began to pull with a strong, deliciously stinging suction. Combined with the moist heat of Jessamine's lips and the fingers which had abandoned their circles to alternately tug and roll Summer's tingling nipples, the sensation was almost too much to feel at one time. They were drawing at him from both sides, sparks jolting through his body whenever they changed pace or position, and all at once he realised that he did need it, just like Jessamine had said he did. The liquid heat, the closeness and intimacy of those who loved him were softening that sharp, grating kernel of pain in a way that nothing else had been able to do, and this more than the pleasure was what made him finally relax. His own tongue was drawn into a fight with Jessamine's, a battle which seemed more for the sake of conflict than for any real gain. Teeth scraped and teased his lower lip, making it ache in the same way that other places already did, coaxed by Day's tonguing into a slow throb; the ropes bit wonderfully into his wrists as he moved, trying to get to a place that he couldn't find. All this heat, building and building-it had to go somewhere, didn't it?

Something instinctive was telling him that somewhere was the best place of all. A mountain peak, a height that made everything else seem only a lead in to the real thing.

Smiling, Jessamine pulled lingeringly out of their kiss and moved to drape himself over Summer's body so that his hands moved once again downward, and his mouth came even with the nipple he had been stroking. Once again, wet warmth surrounded him, a soft and acrobatic tongue circling, stroking and suckling the nub until Summer couldn't help arching up into the sensation, rope holding him, keeping him from thrashing as he wanted to. His thighs ached from being held halfway closed for so long, and from the tension caused by Day's ministrations and Jessamine's mixed; his sex ached with a quick pulse that made him want more than anything to get to that peak. Day moved on at last, leaving behind delightfully bruised skin, to nuzzle at the fat, swollen twin balls throbbing in their sac, and Summer let out a cry with the last of his breath.

"Stop," Jessamine ordered in a low voice, and it took Summer a few moments of gasping through his daze to sort out that he was not speaking to him, but to Day. "Not now. Can you get the ring out of the closet and put that on him?" Tender hands rubbed over Summer's face, Jessamine murmuring in his ear, "You need more than this. It's too soon, okay? You want it to last, don't you?"

He wasn't sure that he did, but he certainly didn't want it to end, and the proximity of Jessamine's mouth was distracting him. A slight rustle from across the room brushed his ears, but it wasn't enough to draw his attention away from the memory of the tingle Jessamine's lips had caused. Turning his head, he searched blindly. Jessamine laughed, voice breaking breathily as he folded long thighs up and around Summer's immobilised hips, bringing the hard ridge of bone under the skin there into contact with his own erection.

"You like kissing, huh?"

"Nn. B' quiet," Summer told him hazily, aiming correctly at last and bringing their lips into compressing contact.

"You know, you're a lot better at this once you're all dizzy," Jessamine mumbled around their tongues after a moment, both hands kneading Summer's sides the way Day's had on his stomach.

"Nn," Summer said again without listening at all. The end of the bed creaked slightly as Day returned with something round and strap-thin in his hands.

"Hold still," he said, settling again between Summer's bent knees, yet Summer couldn't help jerking and whining when one hand wrapped firmly around his shaft, the other slipping something that felt like a belt around the base and pulling it evenly tight. Full, even overfull, his balls tensed and throbbed until he was forced away from Jessamine to pant with want.

"Come up here," Jessamine murmured softly, his voice husky against the harsh backdrop of Summer's own breaths. He beckoned to Day with one hand, stroking maddeningly at Summer's sensitised nipples with the other, skimming first over one, then over its partner, until Summer could hardly see beyond the red and green sparks in his vision. He was vaguely aware of Day moving over the mattress to meet Jessamine up at the head, but it wasn't until Jessamine moaned and abruptly cut off his caresses that Summer was able to focus well enough to care.

They were kissing, eyes closed and mouths working wetly with each other, one of Day's hands tucked in between his husband's legs and massaging hard, wringing small sobbing noises out of Jessamine's throat. All Summer could think, laying there, watching them with wide eyes and a chest bursting for air, was that it was beautiful and he wanted that, and he would find it someday, no matter what it took him to do it.

After what felt like ages, Jessamine pulled away and laid his head on his husband's shoulder. "Please, Day," he said unsteadily.

Day nodded and Jessamine moved over to lie between Summer's legs, each whimpering slightly whenever they grazed up against the other. One of the drawers in the nightstand next to the bed whispered outwards, whispered shut again, and then Day was on top of Jessamine, crouched behind him with his hands blocked out by Jessamine's heaving hips. In and out and in again the older cub-bearer's hips pressed, striking up a beat even as he fumbled to slip off the ring that Day had fastened so snugly. His breathing hard and ragged, Summer couldn't help but meet him thrust for thrust. Behind Jessamine, Day did something that made Summer's friend cry out hoarsely, the rhythm stumbling briefly to a halt, and Day himself let out a low noise of pleasure. After that Day was doing most of the thrusting, and gradually Summer started to realise what they were doing. They were mating, and letting him be part of it, and the thought was so amazing that it sent him abuptly into that beautiful somewhere. The rough spasms that wracked him in the wake of it sent Jessamine into orgasm too, and a moment afterwards, Day.

Panting slowly, Summer wrapped his knees around Jessamine's lax legs and squeezed.

"Let me out?"

"Mm," Jessamine agreed, shifting to reach the knots at his wrists as Day slid a hand in to untie the ones holding his legs in place. "Are we squashing you?"

"Nn-uh," Summer mumbled drowsily. "Can we just stay here and sleep a little?"

"Of course we can," Day said softly.

So they did.

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