For the past 2 years my love of *NSYNC has exploded into a full-blown obsession. Every time my English teacher would give us a writing assignment I would take it upon myself to write about the fab five. I know it annoyed my teacher but hey, I write about what interests me and now I'm sharing my literary talent with you.
January 5, 2000
Chris Kirkpatrick and Justin Timberlake are alike in many ways. They are alike in that they are both members of the pop music group *NSYNC, they both live in Orlando, Florida, and like to play basketball. They are different in that Chris is amazingly sexy and Justin isn't all that cute even though the "teenyboppers" love Justin. Chris is originally from Clarion Pennsylvania and Justin is from Memphis Tennessee.
March 6, 2000 I love *NSYNC. They are the best band in the world. They have beautiful voices and are HOTT! It makes me upset when people confuse them with the Backstreet Boys. They are not the freaking Backstreet Boys.
May 9, 2000 My favorite member of *NSYNC is Chris Kirkpatrick. In my opinion (which is the only one that matters) he is one of the sexiest men alive. Second on my list to my Garth. His voice is beautiful, almost angelic. He looked hot with his dreads, but now looks drool-worthy with his newly shorn luscious locks.
The characters in this story are actual people. I am Kim (obviously). My close friend Amanda is Amanda. She is a huge Clay Walker fan. How I feel about *NSYNC is how she feel about Clay Walker. The evil zookeeper is Amanda's brother Philip.
The citizens of Orlando were appalled. The zookeeper's sordid prank had the town in an uproar. Everyone in town had gathered at the city zoo to pay homage to the sacred green polka-dotted elephant with a pink trunk. Suddenly the cage door flew open. Philip, the evil zookeeper, was holding the key, laughing. Spectators recoiled with fright as Billy Bob, the elephant, ran as fast as elephants can down the highway. Out of nowhere, Orlando denizen and sexiest member of the pop group *NSYNC, Chris Kirkpatrick, appeared.
"I must find an insanely gorgeous young woman and her cute but not nearly as beautiful friend to help me find and return the elephant," he said. A vivacious young girl named Kim jumped up. She was all those things! Pulling her friend Amanda through the crowd towards him, Kim thought of ways to get Chris to fall madly in love with her. "Chris, we're the ones for you," Kim said when they reached him. "You certainly are. Now lets not procrastinate, there's work to be done!" he replied. They were preparing to head out in search of Billy Bob when Clay Walker's tour bus pulled up. Clay jumped out and ran to them. "I must help you," he said. Amanda had no argument with that, and greatly appreciated his solicitude. The four of them hopped on two horses. Chris with Kim's arms wrapped tightly around his torso on one and Amanda gripping Clay's masculine abs on the other. They galloped quickly down the road. After about ten minutes they spotted Billy Bob eating peanuts from a roadside stand. They hopped off the horses and quietly snuck up behind him. Unfortunately, Amanda tripped and fell over Clay. Billy Bob's head whipped around. With a growl the elephant ran maliciously towards them. Chris quickly pulled Kim out of the way. Had this not been a dire situation, Kim would have taken this opportunity to put the mack on Chris. Sadly, she had to save the town. As Billy Bob ran past her, Kim grabbed his tail and pulled him slowly to a stop. Billy bob looked back at Kim with an insolent look on his face. Kim yanked on his tail and the look quickly disappeared. Amanda and Clay started petting Billy Bob to comfort him. Kim apologized to him for pulling his tail. Chris climbed on top of Billy Bob and gently pulled Kim up there with him. Clay and Amanda got on one of the horses. They two were juxtaposed nicely on the horse's back. The other horse was killed tragically by being stepped on by Billy Bob. They all were bereaved over the death and Chris gave a heartfelt eulogy. Then they rode off towards town leaving the horse carcass in the care of the peanut stand owner. Just before they reached the town's center square, Chris and Clay asked Kim and Amanda to marry them. They both ecstatically said yes and after they returned Billy Bob Kim and Chris climbed into Chris's limo. Clay and Amanda climbed into Clay's tour bus. They all drove off into the sunset and lived happily ever after.
The Unfortunate Kangaroo Parsley, a large kangaroo on hiatus from her normal Australian lifestyle, was hopping incongruously down the highway. She was headed for the Orlando Arena. There she would see the vivacious pop group *NSYNC. Little did she know in a short hour she would feel the wrath of the malevolent Kim. Parsley arrived at the Arena only a few minutes before Kim. She avariciously bought *NSYNC t-shirts, hats, and posters. She then found her seat in the front row. By this time Kim had made her way to the Arena also. As she sat down in her second row seat she noticed a nondescript kangaroo sitting right in front of her. She thought nothing of it and the show began. "Ladies and gentlement, boys and girls, teenyboppers of all ages: Jive Recording artists, Chris, Joey, JC, Lance, and Justin...*NSYNC!" an announcer said. A scream was let out so loudly that there was no way to quell it. With lithe movement the *NSYNCers ran out on stage, the opening music of "Here We Go" playing. At the sight of Chris Parsley began jumping up and down. "What the heck?" Kim thought to herself. That kangaroo was blocking her view of Chris. With a small scruple Kim tapped Parsley on the back. She turned around with a coy look on her face. Kim enunciated her words carefully. "You are in my way. Because of your fat kangaroo body I cannot see my Chris!" Parsley was undaunted. She kept jumping until Kim's inplacable hate filled her body. Kim reared back and punched Parsley right square in the face. She then jumped on Parsley and repeatedly punched her in the face. Being mean is an inherent part of Kim. Seeing the commotion Chris jumped offstage and pulled Kim off of Parsley. "What's going on here?" he demanded. Kim quickly gave a comprehensive summary of what happened. Chris led Kim outside and as they sat down in the ubiquitous grass Chris spoke in a non-malicious voice. "Kim, this is quite an odd story. It will probably be told to your posterity one day." "Hopefully they will understand what I went through to be able to see you," Kim replied. "That's so sweet. Kimberly, will you join me for the rest of our tour?" he asked. "Sure," Kim replied,"but where would I sleep?" (wink, wink) "I'm sure we can find a place for you." he said with a smile. And so, hand in hand, they two walked back into the Arena.
Brain Starts:Every morning in Mrs. Burnett's class we had to write about whatever she had on the board.
We would get vocabulary lists and we had to write a story using the words. These are my two stories.
Don't worry, there's more from my crazy mixed up mind to come!
https://www.angelfire.com/fl4/smartass/loveyou.html
