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CHAPTER 3: Tommy

a year later

No one except Taylor's sister knew who Tommy's daddy was. All anyone knew was that she had developed an intense interest for the Backstreet Boys and announced that she was pregnant a month after the concert. She wouldn't reveal the mystery father to her parents, friends, or even Jenny until a few months into her pregnancy.

She was sitting at her kitchen table and Jenny was over for the day. They both had been watching TRL for the last hour, waiting for the surprise Backstreet Boys news that was being announced at the end of the show. Jenny was thrilled to share her passion with her sister, who had become increasingly interested in the Boys. She now not only owned all their CD's, imports, and videos, she also had a Brian pinup taped to her wall in her bedroom. She had just about cried when she saw it in Jenny's room and begged for it.

The last video finished and Carson Daily smiled into the camera. "Now what you all have been waiting for... we have a surprise guest on today's show. Everybody welcome Mr. Brian Littrell.." The girls in the audience and Times Square shrieked with delight. So did Taylor.

Jenny watched her sister, giving her a strange look. Taylor almost loved Brian more than Jenny loved Nick. Taylor didn't know any personal information about him, and refused to learn it. She believed the man should have his privacy. Jenny knew Nick's height, weight, and shoe size. Taylor knew Brian's voice.

Brian looked in the camera and gave one of his goofy smiles. Taylor's breath caught in her throat.

When the girls stopped screaming Carson began to talk to Brian. "Hey man whatís up in Backstreet World?"

"Nothing much... we've been doing some writing... you know.... winding down from the tour. We're taking a little break." The girls in the audience let out a collective "awwwww"

"How's everything with you?" Carson asked politely, patiently waiting for the news to come out. This was going to be a big scoop for MTV.

"Well you know... about the same as it's been before. I'm alright. I'm looking for a new house in the Orlando or Tampa area." he said in his adorable southern drawl. Taylor's eyes widened. She lived in Tampa...

"Why the new house so soon? You and Leighanne just recently bought a place in Atlanta." A girl in the audience booed when she heard Leighanne's name.

Taylor stiffened. Who was Leighanne?

Brian looked around uncomfortably and for the first time Taylor noticed the pain etched in his face. The baby kicked and she rubbed her belly.

"Well actually thatís what I wanted to talk about. Leighanne and I have decided to separate. Our marriage wasn't working out." The girls in the audience cheered and screamed. Brian made a weak attempt at a smile.

Taylor spun around and looked Jenny in the eye. "You didn't tell me he was married!"

Jenny shrugged. "You didn't wanna know."

"Can you give us any indication of what happened? You guys have only been married a year." Carson asked, sympathetically. Taylor's eyes started to fill. When he had been with her he was married? He had used her...

"It just wasn't working out. We both had our careers and we were two entirely different people." Brian paused and looked straight into the camera. "A friend helped me realize the mistake I was making. She didn't know it then. But I want to thank her." he said softly.

Taylor knew it was her. She could tell by the look on his face.. the tone of his voice. He didn't use her... she helped him. He still remembered her.

Carson went on asking very personal questions, questions Brian wasn't very comfortable answering. He needed desperately to get away. Away from the screaming girls, away from the cameras. Taylor could see the new pain in his eyes. She could almost feel it herself. Her eyes filled with tears again and this time she couldn't stop them from pouring down her face.

"Carson needs to stop." she choked out and Jenny looked at her sister in shock. "He doesnít know what Brian's feeling right now. He doesnít know what he's been through..."

"Tay.... neither do you." Jenny's words were meant to comfort, but Taylor sobbed harder.

"I know more than damn Carson Daily thatís for sure." She slowly walked to her bedroom and collapsed on her bed, crying into her pillow. She knew Brian needed someone. She knew that she could take the pain away. She had tried to contact him when she learned of the baby, but of course, contacting the Backstreet Boys was about as impossible as raising Elvis. He would have to come to her although she knew if he was going to, he probably would already. She cried harder.

Jenny came in and wheeled herself next to the bed. With advanced maturity for her eleven years she simply asked "Why are you so into Brian?" When Taylor didn't answer, Jenny's voice cracked as she asked again. "Tay please tell me. I tell you everything..."

Taylor looked at her sister for a second. Maybe she should tell her. "You can't tell a soul.." she sniffled.

Jenny nodded.

"Swear to God?"

Jenny nodded again.

"I'm in love with him." That was the first time she had even admitted it to herself, never mind said it aloud. She realized it was true and said it again. "I'm in love with Brian Littrell."

Jenny looked at her oddly. "But I'm in love with Nick Carter..."

Taylor sighed, exasperated. "What I mean to say is... he's my baby's father."

Jenny's eyes grew wide and her jaw dropped. "You.. and Brian... I didn't even know you met him.... are you the reason he broke up with Leighanne?" she asked, breathlessly.

"No. He broke up with Leighanne because things weren't working out with her."

"Is he your boyfriend?"

"No, sweetie, he's not my boyfriend. I never heard from him after the concert..."

Ignoring the last remark, Jenny grinned. "Do you know what this means?"


"I'm related to the Backstreet Boys!"

Thomas "Tommy" Kyndal Littrell came into the world on Christmas morning at three oíclock. He weighed 7 lbs, 4 oz and kept his mommy in labor for 18 hours. His daddy was still unaware, although Taylor gave him Brian's last name. He was an exact replica of his father. He had his eyes, his curly hair, his mouth, his love for music. For the next few years, Taylor watched him grow into a healthy, bouncy, three year old.

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