How did you get here?!?

My Name Is Mud!

• What? You wanna know my real name??...you didn't ask the right way...and don't be afraid to ask or i'll just pick on you for it. Besides.. you'll probably forget or spell it the wrong anyways! And another thing...you don't just click on my web page like you own the damn thing! Ok.....i guess i'll just spill my guts now. My name is Brian. I live in Florida. I got light brown hair and eyes, I have a nice car, a decent job, and I have a fat pocket. I have a great big.... and ummm..... I play guitar only for people that I think are special. I pick my nose when no ones lookin...oops! You didn't hear that from me. Hmmmm... lets see.. what else... I believe in Santa, my favorite number is 13, I like to eat glue but never with my chicken, I play video game sports, I believe in UFO's, I like to chew on straws and plastic sporks, the only drugs I do is Asprin, but I bet it makes you wonder huh? I wasn't dropped on my head when I was little, I am just naturally weird.

Here's a list of stuff that reallllly pisses me off:
* People that spell my name 'Brain'...I may be smart but I don't look like a fucking brain do I?? Go to school and learn to spell!

* People that drive too slow in front of me...if you don't want me to drag you out of your car and rip you a new asshole...i'd advise you to drive faster please.

* Waitresses at Hooters that have bad attitiudes.



These are some of my favorite quotes... if you don't like them....tough shit!
-Dont drink and drive, you might hit a bump and spill your beer!
-I'm not workin on Sunday so Kiss My Ass!!!!
-For people that spend too much time in the bathroom...cut the log!
-I don't suffer from insanity; I enjoy every minute of it.
-God must love stupid people, he made so many.
-Earth is the insane asylum for the universe.
-Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.
-Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else.
-CAT ~ The Other White Meat!
-I Must Be a Proctologist Because I Work With Assholes!
-A wise man that argues with a fool, is a fool himself.
-Remember My Name ~ You'll Be Screaming It Later.
-I'm not a complete idiot; some parts are missing.
-I used to have a handle on life, but it broke.
-Some people are alive only because it's illegal to kill them.
-I got arrested for sexually assaulting the lawn gnome.
-I do whatever my rice crispies tell me to.
-You think I'm mad now...just wait till I wake up!
-The gene pool could use a little chlorine.
- Welcome To Shit Creek ~ Sorry, We're Out of Paddles!


*MY MOOD TODAY IS - Undecided

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When you get bored click on one of these sites but get back here real fast!

a nude pic of me!!!!
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a nice pic of me!!!!
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