By: Phaedra Phelan


Summary: What Remington and Laura said to each other to get themselves married on that fishing boat. It happened on the street in L.A.

Disclaimer: This "Remington Steele" story is not for profit and is for entertainment purposes only. The author and this site do not own the characters and are in no way affiliated with "Remington Steele," the actors, their agents, the producers, MTM Productions, the NBC Television Network or any station or network carrying the show in syndication, or anyone in the industry.


Remington and Laura stood on the street in Los Angeles in bewilderment as to what to do to resolve their predicament. They had reached such an impasse as to this problem.

The car phone rang. It was Clarissa calling from jail. She had been detained because she had propositioned Keyes and he had had her arrested.

"Oh, Clarissa, if 'death takes a holiday,' why can't you?" Remington was totally frustrated with the situation as he hung up the car phone and turned his attention to Laura again. "Clarissa's in the clink."

"So you're going to give up just like that?"

"Laura, will you come and visit me when I get settled? With these excursion fares nowadays you can go practically anywhere in the world for ninety-nine dollars."

Laura stood glaring at the man that had turned her emotional life upside down for the past four years.

"Well, think of something. You're the 'duke of deception.'"

Remington looked at Laura in total frustration. He was truly at his wit's end on this one.

"I don't know, Laura. I fear that I'm at the end of my tether.

"I am so angry with you, Remington Steele. After we seemed to be

coming so close together finally, how could you do this to me? And with a hooker, no less! I didn't even know you were dating."

"I wasn't dating her, Laura. You know that you're the only woman in my life."

"Well, I thought that I was until I saw you kissing Clarissa from the window of the office."

"Laura, I had to make it look convincing in case I was being watched."

"But a 'call girl?' "

I had to find someone that I wasn't emotionally involved with who wouldn't get involved with me. I wasn't going to sleep with Clarissa. It was just a business arrangement to buy me time with the INS. While they would try to determine if the marriage was legal, I could prove my status. Laura, I don't want to be away from you for one moment. But they were about to throw me out! You continue to tell me that you need time to get where we need to be, but I'm out of time at six o'clock this evening."

"You were so sure that I would have said 'No?'"

"I was sure that you would question my motive, my sincerity. I'm still trying to verbalize, to communicate to you how I feel and you are still so scared of this powerful thing between us."

"I don't want to lose you." The words came hard for Laura but the sight of her dashing, tuxedo-clad Mr. Steele was overwhelming.

"And I don't want to lose you either. Why should it be so bloody hard for us to just say it? I don't want my life to change. If it weren't for you, I would have gone long ago, Laura, as much as I like being Remington Steele. Do you realize that?"

"Yes, I realize that."

"Laura, would you-this is not going to come out right, no matter how I say it. I think that you know that I have very passionate feelings for you. We have begun to come together in that special way. When I think of marriage, I only think of you, Laura. When I think of being with a woman, I only think of you. Do you think that you possible could marry me in this circumstance and, give us the opportunity to finish working out our other issues?"

Laura looked into Remington's blue eyes and he was like a little boy, caught with his hand in the cookie jar, pleading for a second chance. Her hears skipped a beat in her chest.

"Okay, okay. I'll do this. I will. But listen, things will not be-like we're married."

"No, if we're married, we will be married, Laura. I will fulfill your passionate needs. You need that and I do as well. Our beginning to come together has been a beautiful thing for both of us. I won't let you do this unless you agree that we will be together physically. I would rather be deported that have to continue to go through the hell you've put me through these past four years." Remington was firm on this point. He had not planned to be but the words were just coming. The ache he had suffered in his loins for so long would not let him make his situation worse by entering an arrangement with Laura that did not include marital relations.

"So I will have to come across with it. You're driving a hard bargain."

"Laura, don't act as if you don't want it too. The few times it's happened for us you enjoyed it as much as I did. You moaned and groaned and got your teeth rattled to satisfaction. Don't even attempt to say otherwise. We are adults who-care for each other, but we are working ourselves past these issues between us." Remington drew Laura close to him.

"I'm a mess. Oh, this is so terrible. Look at me!" Laura was at the point of tears now. The solving of the crime at UNIDAC had been exhausting enough-rolling in the mud with that creep. And then breaking up the wedding between Remington and Clarissa. "I don't feel good, Remington. My head is aching. I think I'm getting a migraine."

"It's probably because you're getting your period. You are due today, you know."

"Oh, God, you're right. I always forget to keep track."

"That's why you need me around, woman. I can't for the life of me figure why a woman as brilliant as you, never remembers when her period is due. Come on, let's get married and then you can go put your feet up and have a good stiff drink. You were really quite hysterical earlier, Laura. I think you have just about worn yourself to a frazzle today." Remington leaned down, pushed her dirty hair out of her face and kissed her lightly on her lips before opening the door of the limosine for her.

Laura looked at Remington and asked, "Do you know when Clarissa gets her period?"

"No, why would I want to know that. I don't care a fig about Clarissa."

Laura just stared at Remington trying to understand him, hating herself for loving him so.

"I behaved like an idiot, didn't I-in that so-called "Little Chapel of Perpetual Happiness?" Laura bowed her head, remembering her performance earlier and was embarrassed.

"You did come rather unhinged, my dear. It was an unbelievable spectacle-both act one, when I had to carry you out kicking and screaming, as well as act two, when you knocked that door down-that I shall remember for the rest of my life."

"I'm sorry. I just couldn't help it. You made me crazy, Mr. Steele."

"I think that you can call me something other than Mr. Steele now, don't you?" Remington Steele smiled ruefully at Laura now. "And I think that we have just enough time to go to a place I know about to get the documents we need." He closed the door after Laura and ran to the driver's side and got into the car.

"I wish I had time to get cleaned up."

"It's already five o'clock, Laura. There's a fellow I know who can do this for us-you won't have to worry about looking-well, like you are looking. We just have time to pick up some documents and get there."

He looked at Laura who sat dejected, the picture of woe-dirty and exhausted-and the most tender emotions welled up in his chest.

"I'm glad you broke up that farce today. I was the one behaving like an idiot. I wouldn't have wanted to marry anyone but you-honestly and truly. I wouldn't have wanted to. Please believe me, Laura. I have imagined marrying you in a room full of flowers with all our friends, and your family around. I've imagined you in a lovely white gown with your beautiful freckled shoulders and décolleté showing and your hair gleaming like new money." He patted her hand and then kissed it.

Laura put her head back against the seat and silent tears slipped down her face as the car pulled away from the curb. The mixture of emotions that she felt at that moment baffled her but she knew one thing. She was not going to lose Remington Steele because of herself. If he left her it would have to be that he just did not want to be with her any longer.