Do You Drink Too Much Coffee???????

You Know You're Drinking Too Much Coffee When...


You answer the door before people knock
You ski uphill
You get a speeding ticket even when you're parked
You speed walk in your sleep
You haven't blinked since the last lunar eclipse
You sleep with your eyes open
You can jump-start your car without cables
Your only source of nutrition comes from "Sweet & Low."

		You channel surf faster without a remote

People get dizzy just watching you.
You've worn the finish off your coffee table
The Taster's Choice couple wants to adopt you
Your taste buds are so numb you could drink your lava lamp
Starbucks owns the mortgage on your house

You grind your coffee beans in your mouth

You buy * & * by the barrel
You just completed another sweater and you don't know how to knit
You have to watch videos in fast-forward
You lick your coffeepot clean
Your eyes stay open when you sneeze
You can type sixty words per minute... with your feet
You go to AA meetings just for the free coffee
You forget to unwrap candy bars before eating them
You've built a miniature city out of little plastic stirrers
You think being called a "drip" is a compliment

	You have a picture of your coffee mug on your coffee mug

You can outlast the Energizer bunny
You short out motion detectors
You name your cats "Cream" and "Sugar."
You've worn out the handle on your favorite mug
You walk twenty miles on your treadmill before you realize it's not plugged in
You're so wired, you pick up AM radio
People can test their batteries in your ears

Instant coffee takes too long			You don't sweat, you percolate

When someone says. "How are you?", you say, "Good to the last drop."
You want to come back as a coffee mug in your next life
You go to sleep just so you can wake up and smell the coffee
Your three favorite things in life are...coffee before, coffee during and coffee after
You think CPR stands for "Coffee Provides Resuscitation"
You don't get mad, you get steamed


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