“Get it yourself Jeff, I’m busy.”
Jeff rose from his place on the recliner, “What are you doing that’s so fucking important that you can’t get me a goddamn beer?!”
Julie didn’t answer, concentrating on rolling her joint instead. Jeff walked across the room to the chair Julie was sitting in a slapped her, “I don’t hear an answer bitch! What’s so important?”
The little girl scrunched further into the corner of the couch.
I hate it when my mommy and daddy fought, it makes me want to cry when mommy starts crying.
Jeff pulled Julie off the floor by her hair, “Get me a beer bitch!”
He flung Julie across the room, towards the kitchen door. Her shoulder made a loud cracking noise, and her face hit the doorframe. The little girl sitting on the couch began to cry quietly.
If I cry louder, he’ll start hitting me. She thought, My arm still hurts from the last time he hit me.
Julie lay there for a minute, absorbing the shock of the fall and trying to collect her dizzy thoughts.
“Get the fuck up and get me a beer!” Jeff roared, and stalked back to his chair.
Julie slowly pulled herself off the floor and moved to the fridge. She opened the door and peered inside.
“Shit,” she mumbled, “JEFF! THERE’S NO MORE BEER!”
Jeff was out of his chair and in the kitchen in an instant, “What do you mean there’s no more beer? Did you drink it all again you whore?”
Julie prepared herself for another beating, “No Jeff, you drank it today, remember?”
He pulled his hand back and slapped her, sending her across the kitchen. She curled up into a ball, waiting for the kicking to start. Slowly, she counted to 10 in her mind. When she reached 10, she looked up to find that Jeff had left in search of more alcohol. Julie pulled herself off the floor and walked back into the living room.
The little girl was curled up behind the couch, where she usually hid during her parents fights.
“Get up Jaclyn, he’s gone,” Julie said.
Jaclyn slowly stood up, “Is it safe?”
Julie sat back down in her chair and finished rolling the joint she’d now laced with cocaine, “He’s gone. He had to get some more beer. Watch TV.”
Jaclyn sat in front of the TV and stared, not really seeing the images on the screen. Tears had blurred her vision more than once, and she didn’t really care what was going on in TV Land.
Jaclyn heard the door to her father’s car slam and she leaped behind the couch again. Julie prepared herself for another argument by taking a long drag from the joint still held in her hand.
The front door slammed and Jeff stormed inside, “WHERE ARE YOU BITCH?”
Julie, not feeling very much due to the drugs, answered, “In the living room.”
Jeff stomped into the room; “I thought I’d find you here, you useless bitch.”
Jeff pulled Julie from the chair by her hair for the second time that night and began to beat her. She shouted back at him now and then, bur for the most part, stayed silent. She’d learned long ago that by being quiet, he’d quit sooner.
But Jeff didn’t quit this time. He pulled at her blouse, ripping it from her body and started working on her pants. Tears formed in her eyes as he entered her. She didn’t want Jaclyn to witness her father’s brutality. As he raped her, she wept silently, and never calling to her daughter to leave the room. Although she didn’t want Jaclyn to see any of this, she also didn’t want Jeff to see her there and start hitting her as well.
When Jeff was finished, he allowed Julie to get up and out some clothes on. He didn’t bother getting redressed, and walked over to the kitchen and pulled a gun from the drawer. As Julie walked back into the living room to try and mute her pain with more drugs, Jeff made his way towards her. She didn’t see the gun in his hand, but heard it go off. Julie crumpled to the floor, never making a sound. She breathed her last breath an instant later.
Jeff slowly turned the gun on himself. He knew that there was something he was forgetting, but he didn’t care anymore. He pulled the trigger as Jaclyn screamed.
Concerned neighbors had called the police when they heard the gunshots. The police arrived shortly, and found Jaclyn still curled up behind the couch, wailing. They took her to a foster home while they tried to find some family to take her in. Both Jeff and Julie’s parents had died years before, and they were only children. Jaclyn had no one.
The social workers tried to find her a home but no one seemed to want a little girl who rarely ever spoke.
One day while Jaclyn was playing, a man and a woman came with the social worker to see her. The man was somewhat short, with brownish blond hair, and the woman was slightly taller, with long blond hair. “Jaclyn,” the social worker said, “This is Brian and Leighanne. They’d like to take you home with them.”
Jaclyn didn’t say anything, and she didn’t understand why the people wanted to take her home. Seeing the questions in her eyes, Brian kneeled down to look her in the eye.
“Jaclyn, Leighanne and I want to take you home because we want you to live with us,” Brian explained.
“Will you be my new mommy and daddy?” she whispered.
“We’ll try to be, if you want us to,” he answered.
That night, Jaclyn nestled into bed knowing that someone wanted her. She slept peacefully for the first time since her parents died.
When all the paperwork was finished, Jaclyn moved in with Brian and Leighanne. At first, she thought there was something wrong with them, because they were constantly telling her that they loved her and giving her kisses and hugs. With her real parents, the word “love” was never mentioned, and the only contact she’d had with her parents was minimal at best.
Her first Sunday with the Littrells was stranger than any day yet. They woke her up early and told her they were going to a place called church. At first, she was frightened because she thought they were taking her back to the foster home because they didn’t want her anymore. Brian smiled and explained what church was.
Jaclyn walked into the Sunday school room and sat down in the back. The other children had already come in and were talking. She felt like an outsider because all these children were friends and she was the new girl. The door opened and a tall pretty lady walked in. Jaclyn’s eyes moved to the picture by the door. She smiled when she saw it.
“Hello Jaclyn,” the teacher said, “My name is Ms. Godfrey. I’m your Sunday school teacher.”
She saw that Jaclyn was still staring at the picture by the door, “What’s wrong dear?”
“Nothing’s wrong,” she said, “I was just thinking about the man in the picture. I know Him. Well, sort of. I don’t know His name, or why He’s on that cross. I know He got off though.”
“How do you know that sweetie?”
“Because He was with me at my old house, and held me close to Him, saying that He didn’t want me to get hurt.”
“When was this Jaclyn?”
“The night my real parents died.”