Your Mama Jokes

• Your mama is so fat when her beeper goes off, people thought she was backing up.
• Your mama is so fat her nickname is "DAM"
• Your mama is so fat she eats Wheat Thicks.
• Your mama is so fat were in her right now.
• Your mama is so fat people jog around her for exercise.
• Your mama is so fat she went to the movies and sat next to everyone.
• Your mama is so fat she has been declared a natural habitat for Condors.
• Your mamma so fat you have to roll over twice to get off her.
• Your mama is so fat she was floating in the ocean and Spain claimed her for the New World.
• Your mama is so fat she lay on the beach and people run around yelling Free Willy.
• Your mama is so fat when you get on top of her your ears pop!
• Your mama is so fat when she has sex; she has to give directions!
• Your mama is so fat she goes to a restaurant, looks at the menu and says "okay!"
• Your mama is so fat when she wears a yellow raincoat, people said, "Taxi!"
• Your mama is so fat she had to go to Sea World to get baptized.
• Your mama is so fat she got to iron her pants on the driveway.
• Your mama is so fat she put on her lipstick with a paint-roller.
• Your mama is so fat she got to pull down her pants to get into her pockets.
• Your mama is so fat when she tripped over on 4th Ave. she landed on 12th.
• Your mama is so fat when she bungee jumps, she brings down the bridge too.
• Your mama is so fat the highway patrol made her wear "Caution! Wide Turn".
• Your mama is so fat when she sits around the house, she SITS AROUND THE HOUSE!
• Your mama is so fat when she steps on a scale, it read "one at a time, please".
• Your mama is so fat when she sits on my face I can't hear the stereo.
• Your mama is so fat she fell in love and broke it.
• Your mama is so fat when she gets on the scale it says to be continued.
• Your mama is so fat when she gets on the scale it says we don't do livestock.
• Your mama is so fat her neck looks like a pair of hot dogs!
• Your mama is so fat she's got her own area code!
• Your mama is so fat she looks like she's smuggling a Volkswagon!
• Your mama is so fat God couldn't light Earth till she moved!
• Your mama is so fat NASA has to orbit a satellite around her!
• Your mama is so fat whenever she goes to the beach the tide comes in!
• Your mama is so fat when she plays hopscotch, she goes New York, L.A., Chicago...
• Your mama is so fat she's got Amtrak written on her leg.
• Your mama is so fat even Bill Gates couldn't pay for her liposuction!
• Your mama is so fat her legs is like spoiled milk - white & chunky!
• Your mama is so fat I had to take a train and two buses just to get on the bitch's good side!
• Your mama is so fat she wakes up in sections!
• Your mama is so fat when she goes to an amusement park, people try to ride HER!
• Your mama is so fat she sat on a quarter and a booger shot out of George Washington's nose.
• Your mama is so fat she was mistaken for God's bowling ball!
• Your mama is so fat when she lies on the beach no one else gets sun!
• Your mama is so fat when she bungee jumps she goes straight to hell!
• Your mama is so fat when she jumps up in the air she gets stuck!
• Your mama is so fat she's got more Chins than a Hong Kong phone book!
• Your mama is so fat that her senior pictures had to be arial views!
• Your mama is so fat she's on both sides of the family!
• Your mama is so fat everytime she walks in high heels, she strikes oil!
• Your mama is so fat she fell and made the Grand Canyon!
• Your mama is so fat she sat on the beach and Greenpeace threw her in!
• Your mama is so fat that when she hauls ass, she has to make two trips!
• Your mama is so fat even her clothes have stretch marks!
• Your mama is so fat she has a wooden leg with a kickstand!
• Your mama is so fat she has to use a VCR as a beeper!
• Your mama is so fat she broke her leg, and gravy poured out!
• Your mama is so fat when she rides in a hot air balloon, it looks like she's wearing tights!
• Your mama is so fat she got hit by a parked car!
• Your mama is so fat they have to grease the bathtub to get her out!
• Your mama is so fat she has a run in her blue jeans!
• Your mama is so fat when she gets on the scale it says to be continued.
• Your mama is so fat they use the elastic in her underwear for bungee jumping
• Your mama is so fat when they used her underwear elastic for bungee jumping, they hit the ground.
• Your mama is so fat when she backs up she beeps.
• Your mama is so fat she has to buy two airline tickets.
• Your mama is so fat when she fell over she rocked her self-asleep trying to get up again.
• Your mama is so fat she influences the tides.
• Your mama is so fat that when I tried to drive around her I ran out of gas.
• Your mama is so fat she broke her leg and gravy fell out.
• Your mama is so fat the animals at the zoo feed her.
• Your mama is so fat she was baptized at Marine World.
• Your mama is so fat when she dances at a concert the whole band skips.
• Your mama is so fat the Aids quilt wouldn't cover her
• Your mama is so fat she stands in two time zones.
• Your mama is so fat it takes her two trips to haul ass
• Your mama is so fat you have to grease the door frame and hold a twinkie on the other side just to get her through
• Your mama is so fat when the bitch goes to an all you can eat buffet, they have to install speed bumps.
• Your mama is so fat that she can't tie her own shoes.
• Your mama is so fat sets off car alarms when she runs.
• Your mama is so fat she can't reach her back pocket.
• Your mama is so fat when she wears a Malcomn X T-shirt, helicopters try to land on her back! Your mama is so fat she lays on the beach and greenpeace tried to push her back in the water
• Your mama is so fat she uses redwoods to pick her teeth
• Your mama is so fat the only pictures you have of her are satellite pictures
• Your mama is so fat she put on some BVD's and by the time they reached her waist they spelled out boulevard.
• Your mama is so fat she stepped on a rainbow and made Skittles.
• Your mama is so fat she uses a mattress for a tampon.
• Your mama is so fat that when she sits on the beach, Greenpeace shows up and tries to tow her back into the ocean....
• Your mama is so fat that she would have been in E.T., but when she rode the bike across the moon, the bitch caused an eclipse.
• Your mama is so fat she hoola-hooped the super bowl.
• Your mama is so fat she was baptized in the ocean.
• Your mama is so fat they tie a rope around her shoulders and drag her through a tunnel when they want to clean it.
• Your mama is so fat when she got hit by a bus, she said, "Who threw that rock?"
• Your mama is so fat when she stands in a left-turn lane it gives her the green arrow!
• Your mama is so fat that when she was born, she gave the hospital stretch marks.
• Your mama is so fat the National Weather Agency has to assign names to her farts!!!
• Your mama is so fat we went to the drive-in and didn't have to pay because we dressed her as a Chevrolet.
• Your mama is so fat she was Miss Arizona -- class Battleship
• Your mama is so fat she accidentally got a 747 caught in her teeth
• Your mama is so fat to her "light food" means less than 4 Tons
• Your mama is so fat The Himalayas are practices runs to prepare for her
• Your mama is so fat she went on a date with high heels on and came back with sandals!
• Your mama is so fat she stepped on a talking scale and it told her to get off!
• Your mama is so fat and stupid, her waist size is larger than her IQ!
• Your mama is so fat she was zoned for commercial development
• Your mama is so fat she won "Miss Bessie the Cow 99"
• Your mama is so fat she has her own brand of jeans: FA - FatAss Jeans
• Your mama is so fat she has more rolls than a Mary Jane truck

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• Your momma is so hairy you almost died of rug-burn at birth!
• Your momma is so hairy she's got Afros on her nipples!
• Your momma is so hairy she look like she got Buckwheat in a headlock.
• Your momma is so hairy Bigfoot is taking her picture!
• Your momma is so hairy she wears a Nike tag on her weave so now everybody calls her Hair Jordan.
• Your momma is so hairy she looks like a Chia Pet with an Afro!
• Your momma is so hairy she shaves with a weedwhacker

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• Your momma is so nasty when she goes to a hair salon, she told the stylist to cut her hair and she opened up her shirt
• Your momma is so nasty She gotta put ice down her drawers to keep the crabs fresh!
• Your momma is so nasty she made speed stick slow down.
• Your momma is so nasty she brings crabs to the beach
• Your momma is so nasty she made right guard turn left.
• Your momma is so nasty she has to creep up on bathwater.
• Your momma is so nasty Ozzie Ozbourne refused to bite her head off
• Your momma is so nasty I called her for phone sex and she gave me an ear infection.
• Your momma is so nasty lice consider her a great vacation place
• Your momma is so nasty she was declared quarantine since before she was born
• Your momma is so nasty her teeth look like she got jumped by the Cavity Creeps!!!
• Your momma is so nasty she went swimming and now we have the dead sea
• Your momma is so nasty skunks run from her

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• Your Ma'ma is so short you can see her feet on her driver's license!
• Your Ma'ma is so short she has to use a ladder to pick up a dime.
• Your Ma'ma is so short she can play handball on the curb.
• Your Ma'ma is so short she does backflips under the bed.
• Your Ma'ma is so short she models for trophy's.
• Your Ma'ma is so short she is the original Q-tip
• Your Ma'ma is so short she poll vaults with a toothpick
• Your Ma'ma is so short she has to take off her socks to see

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