vonada

I don't have a picture of Mr.Vonada from our universe,

so I'll have to settle for this unless someone can send me one.

The transition from Mr.Vonada to Alternate Universe Vonada was very obvious to almost

everyone. At first, however, many thought Mr.Vonada was just growing a beard but

the harsh reality soon hit them when they began seeing who they believed to be Mr.Vonada

catching innocent children in his finger controlled tractor beam.

Mr.Vonada was the first to meet Mr.Suspenders when he first arrived and they soon became

good friends. When Mr.Vonada explained that you couldn't get an application for principal by

walking in the office and asking for one, Mr.Suspenders thought he would return the favor by showing

Mr.Vonada his finger tractor beam, making him swear to use it only for good. Mr.Vonada agreed and

went back to what Mr.Moen had asked him to do, let the air out of the tires of cars illegally parked in the

co-op lot.

Mr.Vonada started using the tractor beam for catching students as they stole food from the cafeteria

and as they ran through the hallway, blatantly ignoring his "NO HORSEPLAY" signs.

One afternoon, Mr.Vonada was looking through his telescope, the hubble, and pointed his tractor beam

into a black hole. He was sucked in and a Mr.Vonada from another, more evil, universe was put in his place.

The alternate universe Vonada ran a tight ship. He would pull people over in the hallways when they hadn't

done anything. They were punished "Just for thinking about it". He even used the beam to tackle opponents

at football games and lift women's skirts.

At the same time, in another universe, the real Mr.Vonada was busy trying to figure out why, in that universe,

his wife (she had a goatee, too) didn't have his damn tapioca pudding ready when he went to watch

Sportscenter. He was also thrown off by the fact that he had to use a cat box, but that was more of a

surprise than a disturbance.

The Vonada from our universe's wife discovered something was wrong when she found him urinating

in the cat box and immedeately after, washing himself with his tounge. He had tried the cat box thing

before but the tounge cleaning part threw her off.

She immediately took him to Dog Exorcist she saw on Hard Copy the night before and called NASA.

Since NASA had sold the hubble to Mr.Vonada for some POGS about 6 months earlier, there was

nothing they could do. However, they taped a bunch of binoculars together and pointed it at the hole

and forced him to use the beam.

All returned to normal the next day except Mr.Vonada was stuck on the concept of using a lawn

mower for his daily circumcisions.