so that you can stop sending me all that fan mail
Will THE FILM ever be made?
Yes, at some point, when I'm not skinning pop stars for my fall suede purses with fringe and beads, I am going to begin filming THE FILM. Really, it could be done over any four day weekend. Afterall, it's not like my backyard is going anywhere.
Can I know more about that hottie Monica? Is she single?
No, unfortunately Monica is not single, for nearly a year now she has been dating Orlando Bloom and Brandon Boyd. However, keeping them both happy can prove to be a problem, so she may be available in the future. Another little tidbit about the most charismatic star/writer/director/goddess of THE FILM: she has a tendency to compulsively lie.
Is it true that all the stars of THE FILM got tatoos to commorate their experience working on the movie?
No.
I heard that Shakira is better than Britney Spears, is it true?
Yes, it is true that Shakira could kick Britney's bum. And Britney has no chin and a big nose, and she dances like doody, and let's face it, she can breathe really loud, but that's really not singing.
Where in production is THE FILM exactly?
Well, the script is being rewritten to accomodate all those interested in taking part in the filming. It now includes a dance of evil joy. A number of parts need to be added, and I need to find a spare moment to devote to something as important as THE FILM.
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