Alaskan Fire Dragon

A spin-off of “The Angry Dragon”. When a chick is giving you a blowjob, cum in her mouth unexpectedly and plug up her mouth at the same time. Then whisper in her ear something like "I have syphilis" so she spews it out her nose.

Anal Boot

When you take a pitcher of beer, everyone spits in it, someone stirs it with their cock and then the mixture is poured through the crack of a man ass into the waiting mouth of the loser of a bet or Drinking game.

The Angry Dragon

Immediately after you blow your load in a girl's mouth, smack the back of her head and make it come out her nose. When she gets up she'll look like an angry dragon. (CAUTION: Be sure not to smack her head so hard that she will chomp down on your cock!)

Australian Death Grip

The act of grabbing a woman by the haunches/crotch and staring deeply into her eyes until you're slapped or kissed - a recommended tactic for very crowded bars and is another great opportunity for wagering among friends.

Ball Sacking

Stretching of the scrotum over the face of someone sleeping or passed out, having a picture taken and posting it on the Internet

Beef Curtain

The shanked out remains of the labia after being stretched like Play-doh for an hour or so of jimmy-jam (AKA Beef Drapes, Meat Tarp, Piss Flappers, Quim Nuts, Vertical Bacon Sandwich).

The Bizmark

This is easy. Have a girl give you a blowjob and as you're about to cum, pull out and let it go all over her face. The key to this one is that you have to punch her in the nose and make her bleed, so you get the full effect. A Bizmark (donut) has Creme and Jelly.

Blocking the Box

When you and your pal are double-teaming a chick - he's got her from behind, you've got her mouth.  Selfishly, he drops his load in her, thus preventing you from using that input later (AKA Access Denied Error, Road Closed Due to Bad Conditions).

The Blumpkin

You need to find a real tramp to do this right. It involves having her suck you off while you're on the shitter.

The Bronco

Back to reality with this classic.  You start by going doggy style and then just when she is really enjoying it, you grab her tits and or a large lock of hair as tight as possible and yell another girl's name or state "You know, you're by far the ugliest girl I ever fucked".  This gives you the feeling of riding a bronco as she tries to buck you off.

California Chip

Get your nut off and leave it on the girl till the morning so it dries up like a potato chip.

CBBL (Cry Baby Bootie Lock)

A position in which the woman lies on her back legs in the air. The man locks his hands to her ankles and bangs her ferociously. She will scream and cry as you ram her over and over again. If you can get a tight enough grip on her ankles, you may even be able to throw it in her ass a few times, hence the Bootie Lock.

CD (Cum Dumpster)

Refers to a girl who has been around the block quite a few times, hence she is full of cum. (AKA SR = Sperm Receptacle)

The Chili Dog

You take a shit on a girl's tits and then proceed to titty fuck her.

Chocolate Cha-Cha

Simply stated - Anal Sex. Used in a sentence: "John and George danced the chocolate cha-cha all night." (A.K.A. Driving the Hershey Highway, Riding the Dirt Trail, Utilizing the Third Input, Poking the Brown Eye)

The Cleveland Steamer

Mentioned below in The Fountain of You.  After dumping your load on and around her chest--you position your ass just above your own pool of soup and sit in it, full weight, possibly causing her to gasp for breath.  You then pretend to be pulling the whistle cord on a genuine Cleveland steam ship.  As you make the loud noise you slide in your spunk from her chest to her bush smearing a spunk trail on her body in your wake.  This can be done with the male facing either direction.  The more authentic the steam-whistle sound, the better.

Cold Faithful

Blowing your visibly-steaming load outside in the winter-time, like when you get your cock sucked on a ski-lift.

Consolation Prize

When you take a girl home from the bar, thinking you're going to get laid, and from all of the drinks you've been feeding her all night long, she passes out on the bed right before you get your pants off.  To get revenge, you jerk off and spray your load all over her back.  Even though you lost and didn't get laid, the satisfaction you got is almost as good, hence the term consolation prize.

Coyote

This occurs when you wake up in the room of someone nasty and you know you've got to give her the slip.  However, you realize that your arm is wrapped around them.  Therefore you must gnaw off your own arm to get out of the situation.  Caution - this can be very painful.

Cum Guzzling Sperm Burping Bitch

The once in a lifetime act of blowing a hot steamy load down the back of a girl's throat and then proceeding to give her a large cold bottle of your favorite carbonated drink, making her guzzle it down. Then, shake her head vigorously back and forth to create the Cum Guzzling, Sperm Burping effect. A great way to impress your friends.

DAFH (Double Anal Fish Hook)

The chick lies on her back spread eagle waiting to be eaten out. Put two thumbs in her puckered starfish (Double Anal) and two index fingers in her twat (Fish Hook). You will always have the middle finger to diddle her clit, usually with the right hand but lefties may be better with the left (Put it all together it is said, "Double Anal Fish Hook with one to play".)

DDF (Distance Distortion Factor)

Refers to someone who may seem attractive from far away but is ugly upon closer inspection - "good from far, far from good".  Used in a sentence: "Woah, she's hot...  wait a sec. Ugh major DDF!" (AKA "Monet" - like a painting by the artist Monet. You get the point here.)

Dirty Sanchez

A time honored event in which while laying the bone doggy-style, you put your finger into her asshole. You then pull it out and wipe it across her upper lip, leaving a thin shit moustache. This makes her look like a Dirty Mexican named Sanchez. A very popular European variation of this maneuver called "The Hitler" involves a simple shit smudge under her nose, replicating the look of Hitler's mustache. (AKA Dirty Mexican)

Dog in a Bathtub

This is a proper name for when you attempt to insert your nuts into a girl's ass.  It is so named because it can be just as hard as keeping a dog in the tub while giving it a bath.

The Donkey Punch

Banging a girl doggy style and then moments before you cum, you stick your dick in her ass and then punch her in the back of the neck. The blow to the neck will stun the muscles in the female's ass, which will constrict the penis and give you a tremendous orgasmic experience when you ejaculate. But for it to work correctly, the girl must be knocked out so that her asshole tightens up.

Double Fishhook

From the doggy-style position, you hook your pinky fingers in her mouth and pull back to achieve deeper penetration.

The Dutch Oven

Also a well known move. Whenever you fart while humping, pull the covers over her head. Don't let her out until all movement ceases.

The Fat Lip

If you get poison ivy and finger a girl, her labia lips will swell. A la, “The Fat Lip”.

Felching

It occurs after you have been sticking your babe in the can, you bust your nut in there, back up and then pucker your lips up to her rim and suck out your ranch dressing.  (This is also the first step of a very advanced maneuver called the Halmstad Hook). OR Simply licking bung. (AKA "Tossing Salad")

The Fish Eye

From behind, you shove your finger in her ass, thereupon she turns around in a one- eyed winking motion to see what the hell you are doing.  At that point, you have received a "Fish Eye."

Fishhook

A variation of "The Shocker" (an uninvited digit placed in the girl's anus) in which, with the finger still up there, you "hook" back in the direction the pussy.  No real purpose here other than to think to yourself while doing it, "Ah yes the Fishhook..." Another variation called the "New Jersey Meathook" involves sticking your uninvited digit in the girl's anus while fucking her from behind.  You finger is then turned upward toward her back and you pull her entire body toward you over and over while she is sliding on your cock.

The Flaming Amazon

This one's for all you pyromaniacs out there. When you're screwing some chick, right when your about to cum, pull out and quickly grab the nearest lighter and set her pubes on fire, then...extinguish the flames with your jizz!

The Flying Camel

As she is lying on her back and you are hammering her on your knees, you very carefully move forward and prop yourself (without using your arms) on your dick while it is still inserted in her vertical seafood taco. You then proceed to flap your arms and let out a long shrieking howl, much like a flying camel. This is strictly a classy move.

The Fountain of You

While sitting on her face and having her eat your ass, jerk off like a madman.  Build up as much pressure as possible before releasing.  Then spew like a venerable geyser all over her face, neck and tits.  (Better in her bed).  This is also a variation of the first stage of a Cleveland Steamer described earlier.

Fumilingus

When a man (or woman) performs cunnilingus on a woman and she farts directly in his face.

Furr Ball

You're chomping away at some mighty trollop who has a mane between her legs the size of Lionel Ritchie's afro, you don't mind though, that is until a mammoth furr ball gets lodged in your throat and causes you to beat the piss out of her.

Game of Smiles

This game involves men sitting around a circular table and a woman giving random blowjobs underneath the table.  Anyone who "smiles" has to buy a round of beer for the rest.

Gaylord Perry

Going to only one knuckle during an anal probe is for wimps. Make this famous knuckle-ball pitcher proud and use multiple digits on that virgin corn hole. A minimum of 2 knuckles required (either on one finger or on multiple).

Glass Bottom Boat

Putting saran wrap over the skank's face and taking a dump.

Going to the Bullpen

The act of fingering the anus prior to having anal sex.  It kind of "paves the way".

Golden Shower

Any form of pissing on a girl. (AKA watersports)

Goobin

One of the many wives had by an old-style Mormon who is not the main wife.  The setup usually involves having your one "main" wife and the rest of your other wives who are strictly used for procreation.  Hence "Goobin" - a bin for his goo.  Used in a sentence: "Mary's one of John's goobins".

Grand Pappy Smash

To beat your meat so hardcore that it starts to chafe and bleed.

The Halmstad Hook

As mentioned above in Felching.  This is a unique sequence of events named after a town in Sweden, where this apparently happens quite frequently.  After dumping your spunk in her rear, the sauce is sucked out of the anus by the male.  Once the sauce has transferred from her bowls to your mouth--the product that has been created is now known as "Swedish Cheese." The move is completed when the "Swedish Cheese" is transferred to the ladies mouth via a deep tongue kiss.  You can cap this off with a swift stinging slap of her ass to show her how much you care and appreciate all her hard work.

The Havana Omellette

Proceed to nail a chick in any position and then just let loose and blow chunks all over her.

The Homolic Maneuver

Using your cock to dislodge an object blocking a choking victim's windpipe.

The Hoover

Tag a girl from behind on a rug. Then knock her arms out from underneath so her face drops to the rug. Continue to tag her from behind and push her all around on the rug like she cleaning the floor.

A Hot Carl

A simple maneuver where you withdraw your shaft from the bowels of her anus and place it directly into her mouth for a cleaning. Apparently some guy named Carl first tried this.

Hot Lunch

While receiving head from a woman, (her, on her back, you straddle her chest) you proceed to shit on her chest--just for the hell of it.  She then becomes the "Lunch Lady." (AKA The Cleveland Steamer without the whistle)

The Houdini

Going at it doggy-style until you are just about to come, then pull out and spit on her back so she thinks that you have. When she turns around a blast is unleashed into her face and she is left shocked and amazed, wondering how you managed it.

Intoxicourse

Having sexual intercourse whilst piss-drunk.

Insta-gasm

Pre-mature ejaculation at the sight of a beautiful woman. ie: "She was so fine, I had an insta-gasm before I could get her clothes off!"

Jelly Doughnut

A derivation of the Bizmark. All you have to do is punch her in the nose while you are getting head.

Jim Henson

When you fist someone and physically lift him or her off the ground.  (AKA "The Muppet", "Ass Puppet", "Meat Puppet")

The Kangmin

While a girl is reciting bad poetry, you take her from behind.

Kennebunkport Surprise

The act of covertly filling your cheeks with chunky-style New England Chowder, and screaming in disgust as you hurl it between your partners legs while giving oral sex.

Leave-in Conditioner

Dollops of semen strategically left in a woman's hairdo at a public gathering following fellatio.  A good lesson for those who refuse to swallow the evidence

Lucky Pierre

The middle man in a three way buttfuck. (AKA “The French Sandwich”)

Matching Drapes

Reference to whether or not a woman's pubic hair color matches the hair on her head.  Used in a sentence: "Wow what a hot looking redhead, but I wonder if the curtains match the drapes?"

Mung

Two people dig up the corpse of the recently deceased.  One undresses the mungee and places his mouth over the sexual area.  The other backs up and does a running jump onto the corpse's chest.  The second person has to eat everything that enters his mouth.  Insult, seen here in context: "I'm going to mung your grandmother!" OR What runs out the twat of a very pregnant girl who has been beaten on the swollen belly.

New York Style Taco

Anytime when you are so drunk that when you go down, you boot on her box.  All the fixin's. (AKA "A Wet Betsy")

Old Jizm Trail

The stream of semen oozing down the chin and chest of someone who has just finished fellating a senior citizen.

Pasteurize

Once you get her hairy bush past your eyes, you got it licked!

Paying the Rent

A position in which the woman is folded in half, knees above shoulders, while the man holds the back of her calves and bangs her ferociously.

Pearl Necklace

Whenever you cum on the neck area of a girl - it takes on the look of beautiful jewelry

Pegging

Having a skank fuck you in the rear with a strap on.

Pet Shop

Inserting a small rodent such as a mouse or hamster in the anal cavity or if a woman is very stretched, in the vagina and left to roam around.  The name comes from an English pop group

Pencil Sharpener

A chick that gives a rough and toothy blowjob that scrapes your cock up something awful.

Pink Glove

This frequently happens during a marathon session (maybe a second round) when a girl is simply not wet enough.  When you give up and attempt to pull out to give her money or whatever, the inside of her twat sticks to your hog like the inside of a leather glove.  Thus, the pink glove.

Pole Vault

Originated by ancient Romans.  When the female has sucked your pole to the point of ejaculation she swiftly inserts the index finger of her right hand into your anus.  This surprise causes a subtle popping out of the eyes, a natural arch to the lower back and extra propulsion necessary to clear the high bar. Bruce Jenner added this to his warm-up routine after losing to Sergie Bubka in the 1979 Olympics

Purple Mushroom

This occurs when a woman is giving you oral sex and you pull your penis back slightly before poking it back into the inside of her cheek.  It should leave a lasting impression similar to that of a purple mushroom.

The Ram

Again, you're attacking from behind, when you start ramming her head against the wall in a rhythmic motion.  The force of the wall should allow for deeper penetration.  Very handy for those lulls in penile sensitivity.

Ray Bans

Put your nuts over her eye sockets while getting head. (You're can is on her forehead. Yes, it may be anatomically impossible, but it is definitely worth a try.)

Reading the Defense

The concept of a guy making a split second decision when in a situation to score with some chick when out without his girlfriend/wife.  "Reading the Defense" refers to making all of the proper "game time adjustments" not to get caught cheating later on at some point. Having Beer Goggles makes it very hard to Read the Defense.

The Rear Admiral

An absolute blast. When getting a chick from behind (with both partners standing), make sure you don't let her grab onto anything when she is bent over. Then, drive your hips into her backside so that the momentum pushes her forward. The goal is to push her into a wall or table, or have her trip and fall on her face. You attain the status of Admiral when you can push her around the room without crashing into anything and not using your hands to grab onto her hips.

Redwings

One, who has eaten a ragging chic out, has received his redwings.

The Pasadena Mudslide

Have a girl lie on her back and then squat over her while she's giving you head. Proceed to time your wad with a huge diarrhea shit right down the valley between her breasts.

The Rodeo

This takes the help of your friends. Set them up in a closet with flashlights. The next step is to put on a cowboy hat and take your woman to that room and shut the lights off. When your friends start seeing you do her from behind they come out screaming with the flashlights and you see how long you can hold on! Just like a day at the rodeo, remember points for eight seconds or longer. (“The Butt Rodeo” – instead of ramming her mound of muff, try throwing it in her ass with this classic. Remember, eight seconds or longer to get those points!)

Rusty Anchor

After a healthy term of the Stove Piping, the recipient gets to enjoy a good fudgesicle.

The Rusty Trombone

This starts with tagging a girl in her asshole. After you get your dick nice and dirty you tell the girl to lick your ball sack from behind while she jerks you off. And voila, you have the rusty trombone. OR The process by which one person is tossing a guy's salad, and then reaches around and gives them a hand job.

Sandpiper

A stove piping on the local beach, desert, or playground sandbox. (AKA The Sandblast.)

San Diego Surprise

The act of bringing a girl home and while you are fucking her, a friend in waiting enters the room naked in hopes of a consensual threesome. Named by Navy guys stationed in San Diego.  Rumored to work about one third of the time.

SCIF (Slap Cock In Face)

Like I said, Slap Cock In Face. If you have a big enough cock and enough force behind it, you can do the SCIF induced Bizmark.

The Screw-ni-corn

When a dyke puts her strap-on dildo on her forehead and proceeds to go at her partner like a crazed unicorn.

The Shocker

Simply put - two in the pink and one in the stink. Hand gesture needs to be seen for the full effect on this one. Hold hand out horizontal palm facing inward. With your thumb, pull in and hold your ring finger. The index and middle fingers are for the pink and the pinky is for the stink (of course, if the bitch likes it in the ass you can always just shove in the other fist!)

The Six-Pack

Used to get a bitch's attention when munching rug. Put your thumb in her ass and your middle finger in her twat so that you are grabbing her taint. It is kind of like grabbing a six-pack of beer by the plastic holders.

Smoking Pole

Self-Explanatory. Don't use fire.

The Snowmobile

When plugging a girl while she's on all fours reach around and sweep out her arms so she falls on her face.

The Southern Trespass

The Southern Trespass most frequently occurs when an over zealous (drunken) man is involved in intercourse with his lady friend.  Through lack of concentration, lack of coordination, or simply because he wants to do it, the man quickly switches from the woman's vagina to the corn hole, without missing a beat.  If executed properly, this act catches the female by complete surprise, stunning her like a cattle prod to the ass in a rainstorm.  No matter how long the man reaps the benefits of his efforts, he can now be content with the fact that he has committed the coveted Southern Trespass.

Stove Piping

Taking it in the ass, Getting Butt Fucked.

The Stranger

Sitting on your hand until it falls asleep and then jerking off, eliciting the feeling of a hand job from someone else.

Stuf-Fucking

The act of "stuffing in" your limp, helpless member in hopes of getting it up. Potential causes: you're too drunk or she's too Fugly.

Tea Bag

As you are sitting on a girl's face, repeatedly dip your scrotum in and out of her mouth, similar to a tea bag in a cup of hot water OR Swirling a chick's used, bloody tampon into a glass of warm water and gulping it all down. Sweetened of course.

Throwing A Pickle Down A Hallway

When you've just laid the pipe to some chick (usually fat) who has a big loose box.  Used in a sentence: I may as well have just thrown a pickle down the hallway instead of fucking Fat Fanny's loose gash.

Tony Danza

A spin-off of the donkey punch. When you are about to cum while doing a girl from behind, you say "who's the boss?" and stick it in her ass. Before she says anything you shout "TONY DANZA!" and punch her in the back of the head.

Tossing Salad

Licking another's anus (Chowing Starfish). Done in prison as payment for drugs.

Tuna Melt

Lights out, you're down on a chick lapping away at an unusually juicy slab when you discover that it just happens to be the time of the month.  A man of honor, by no means do you stop.  When the whale spews, tartar sauce with a hint of raspberry smothers your face.  (This only work with chicks who REALLY cum hard).

Tupperware Party

When three guys are triple-teaming a chick ...  one with his penis in her mouth, another in her vagina, and the third in her anus.  So named because she is sealed airtight.

Turkey Shoot

When you're coming, come on her face and let it drip off her chin so it looks like that red shit on the turkey's chin.

Twinkler

When you are 69-ing and she gags on your member and you can see her puckered starfish tighten up and “twinkle” like a star.

Times Square Shuttle

You have two girls with you and they are in the 69 position with each other.  You then alternately fuck each of them while they chow each other.  You go from the missionary position on one and run to the other side and work in doggie style on the other one.  Repeat as many times as necessary / possible.  (AKA "Burning the Candle at Both Ends", "Playing Ping Pong", "The Gunga Din")

The Under Dog

After a hard session at the gym, your armpit muscle begins to twitch; thus giving you the ability to jerk a guy off with your armpit muscle.

Valsalva

The act of pinching shut (with thumb and forefinger) a woman's nose while receiving fellatio; most effective when employed just prior to the release point due to the gag reflex and ensuing swallow that the woman is forced to do to continue breathing.  A great first date ploy, as it sets the stage for what the rules of engagement will be ahead.

Vyper, Super Vyper, Hyper Vyper

This move is very similar to The Shocker in that you have some in the pink and some in the stink. Instead of holding your hand palm in, turn it so palm faces the floor. Rotate your thumb downwards and roll pinky and ring finger down into palm. Insert two in the pink and one in the stink. This is the Vyper. Three fingers in the pink is the Super Vyper and all four in the Hyper Vyper.

The Walrus

When she's giving you a blowjob and you cum in her mouth unexpectedly, cover up her mouth and punch her in the stomach.

Western Grip

When jerking off, turn your hand around, so that your thumb is facing towards you. It is the same grip that rodeo folks use; hence, western.

Woody Woodpecker

The all time classic maneuver of tapping your cock on a chick's forehead whilst she is sucking on your balls, and uttering the timeless phrase "Who's your daddy?"

The Zombie Mask

While getting head from your favorite, unsuspecting, trash-barrel whore, tell her you want her to look right up at you with those "pretty little eyes" when you blow your load. Then, just when you're

ready to spew a good weeks worth of goo, blast that hefty load in both eyes. This temporary state of blindness will produce the zombie effect as she stumbles around the room with arms outstretched, and moaning like the walking dead.