Title: It Must Have Been the Mistletoe
Part: 02/03
Author: Calic0cat
Archives: At calic0cat.freeservers.com (my site) and
at Mediaminer.org under Calic0cat. Anyone with archive permission for my other
fics can help themselves; anyone else, please ask.
Notes: See Part 1 for
warnings, pairings,
etc.
#################################################
"They'r
e *what*?" Zechs demanded in disbelief.
"Sleeping," Abdul replied
calmly.
"In the *library*? *All* of them? At 11:30?"
Relena placed
one hand on her brother's arm and smiled up at him. "It's quite the sight to
see," she said. "The first time that they kept me at a safehouse for protection,
it surprised me to walk into the living room in the morning and find Gundam
pilots draped all over each other and the furniture, sleeping quite peacefully.
Rather sweet, really, though I'm sure they'd all object to *that* description.
Unfortunately, that particular time they had a rather rude awakening as I ah -
expressed my dismay somewhat vocally at finding Duo sprawled across Heero's
chest in what I thought was a much too intimate fashion." Reading the odd look
that Zechs shot at her correctly, she corrected his assumption, "No, it's
nothing like that. No group orgies, brother dear. Sometimes the nightmares about
all the death and the killing get really bad and they just all find some relief
from them in being near another person. Some of them need actual physical
contact, while for others merely being in close proximity is enough. I spent a
few rather strange nights on various couches or in chairs myself during the war
and even over the years since then when only one of them happened to be assigned
to watch over me and had trouble sleeping." She broke into laughter at the
disbelieving looks from Zechs and Dorothy both. "Oh come on now, I wasn't *that*
bad *all* the time! I *could* actually be considerate and helpful when
circumstances called for it!"
************
Stirring
slightly, Duo reluctantly decided that perhaps it was time to think about
getting up. Having actually been fed a real meal last night, his stomach
apparently thought it should be entitled to another one and was grumbling rather
insistently. Starting to sit up, he stopped as his braid resisted movement.
'Damn, forgot about that habit of Heero's. Guess some things never change. Never
could figure out what it was with him and hanging onto my braid in his sleep...'
Resigning himself to staying put till Heero woke up, he twisted slightly so that
he could see the others. Wufei looked like a pretzel, all curled up in a chair.
'Shit, 'Fei, you're gonna regret sleeping this long like that... We aren't 15
anymore and that position would have made any of us pretty stiff and sore even
back then...' Getting his first good look at Quatre's face, Duo was unable to
suppress a low whistle, "Damn Quat, have you ever got one hell of a
shiner..."
"Gee, thanks, Duo, that's exactly what I wanted to hear first
thing in the morning," the blond in question retorted sleepily from the
rug.
"Quatre, could you move your head a little? I think I've lost all
feeling in that arm," Trowa spoke up.
As Quatre sat up, Wufei started to
stir in the chair. Incoherent muttering in Mandarin accompanied every move he
made.
"Not exactly 15 any more, are we?" Duo observed as Heero finally
woke up enough to release his braid and allow him to get up.
"Ouch,"
Heero observed, rubbing his back ruefully and glaring at the couch accusingly,
"no, we're not."
Rubbing at his own stiff limbs, Quatre declared, "Not
that this was ever *completely* comfortable even then... All in favour of
turning a spare room into a dorm for us all so we don't have to go through this
again just to have a decent night's sleep, say 'aye'."
An immediate
chorus of "Aye"s rang out.
************
"We're supposed to
*what*?" Wufei asked in surprise.
"Decorate the house for the holidays,"
Quatre answered. "We've spent most of the week so far catching up on sleep, but
I think we've about used that excuse up. I don't know about anyone else, but *I*
don't want Iria, Une, or Sally showing up to take a more direct hand in things
because we're not following their 'schedule'."
"Good plan," muttered
Zechs, digging through the boxes of decorations littering the floor. "My god,
there's enough mistletoe here to carpet the place in it," he exclaimed in
disbelief. "All the boxes marked 'holly' are full of mistletoe instead! And the
couple of boxes marked 'mistletoe' have holly in them..."
"Great! I call
dibs on the mistletoe," Relena said cheerfully. "Dorothy, want to
help?"
"Why my dear Miss Relena, I thought you'd never ask," Dorothy
responded with a sly smirk.
Looking back and forth between the two young
women, Zechs closed his eyes and shook his head slightly. "Not going to ask,
don't want to know, please don't tell me."
Laughing, Relena held a
cluster of mistletoe over her brother's head and gave him a quick peck on the
cheek. "Don't worry about it, bro. I'm a big girl now and my sex life was never
*your* problem to begin with."
Turning red, Zechs hid his face in his
hands, "Too much information, sis! Go on, get out of here you
two!"
Snickering, Dorothy repeated Relena's mistletoe trick before
picking up a stack of boxes and pulling Relena out of the room with
her.
"Anybody want a little sister, cheap?" Zechs muttered.
"No
thank you," Quatre said fervently, "I have more than enough females in my life
as it is."
"Better not let Iria hear you say that," laughed Duo, picking
up a couple of boxes of ornamental candles. "And I don't need one either -
keeping Hilde out of trouble till she got married was bad enough and 'Lena and
Dot *already* act like bratty sisters around us anyway..." With that, he
wandered off, carefully choosing a *different* direction from the two
women.
************
After a full week of relaxing with
nothing more demanding than decorating the house for the holidays to do, all
eight houseguests were beginning to feel much better. Enough better, in fact,
that two particular houseguests had started arguing as they usually did whenever
they were in close proximity.
"Zechs, he wouldn't 'get on your case'
nearly as much if you'd stop getting on his!" Relena declared in a decidedly
frustrated tone. "Okay, so I'll admit the crack about blowing up half the
mountain if you get in a 'pissy mood' was out of line, but then again, *you*
started it with that crack about working for the 'diapered dictator' if he got
bored! And if Maia finds out you called her that, Chang Wufei will be the
*least* of your worries!"
"Behave yourself, Zechs," Dorothy scolded.
"Your sister is supposed to be taking a break from peace-making, not spending
her entire vacation carrying out peace negotiations between two houseguests!
Honestly, you're acting like a couple of high school kids!" Muttering under her
breath, she added in a voice soft enough to only reach Relena's ears, "Ones with
crushes on each other..."
"Now go find somebody else to bother!" Relena
ordered her brother. "And if you run into Wufei again, kiss and make up rather
than picking another fight!"
Stalking down the hall, Zechs muttered under
his breath, "Kiss and make up, she says! As if *that* would make things any
better! No, I'd be more likely to get run through with that damn katana of
his..."
"Talking to yourself now, Merquise? What's wrong, no one else
interested in what you have to say?" came an insolent sneer from the doorway to
the games room.
That did it. With just one thought in his mind, wiping
that insolent look off of Wufei's haughty face, Zechs pointed above Wufei's
head, said succinctly, "Mistletoe," grabbed the Chinese man by the shoulders,
and kissed him forcefully on the lips. By the time Wufei recovered enough to
stop sputtering and start uttering threats, Zechs had beaten a prudent retreat,
borrowing a car to go to town for the rest of the
morning.
************
"What's Wufei so worked up about
this time?" Quatre asked Trowa curiously.
Watching the young man in
question stomp out of the room, Trowa answered, "Don't you mean
'who'?"
"Oh dear," Quatre sighed. "What did Zechs do this
time?"
"That's the interesting part - he wouldn't say. Though if I didn't
know better, I would almost swear he *blushed* when I asked him that
question."
"Chang Wufei *blushing*? Now I'm even *more* curious," the
blond said, moving towards the door to see where Wufei was disappearing off
to.
Looking above Quatre's head, a small smile crept across Trowa's face.
"Mmm, guess I'll have to keep you too busy to be curious," he said, advancing on
the Arabian in a purposeful fashion. "Mistletoe," he explained, pointing
upwards, in response to Quatre's curious look. Pulling his partner towards him,
he murmured softly, "I just can't get used to not having to bend down to kiss
you anymore. How did we let so much time go by?" Not giving Quatre a chance to
answer that question, he leaned forward to bring their mouths together in a
warm, lingering kiss.
As they drew apart again, Quatre offered softly, "I
don't know, but what I *do* know is that I have no intention of letting it
happen again." The puzzle of Wufei's odd behaviour forgotten for the moment, he
drew Trowa towards him for another kiss, murmuring just before their lips met,
"I have to remember to thank Iria for all that
mistletoe..."
************
Walking through the cold but
snowless countryside, Heero stole a sidelong glance at his still-too-subdued
companion. While Duo's eyes would brighten briefly at times, they still remained
too dull and shadowed to suit Heero. Duo's hair had regained its healthy shine
and the dark circles were gone from around his eyes; he had even gained a tiny
bit of weight back. But Duo was still far from his old self. And Heero very much
suspected it was his fault. Oh, not due to things he was doing *now* - those
were the things that would bring that short-lived brightness into those amethyst
eyes - but rather due to his failure to respond in past months to Duo's
tentative attempts to suggest that perhaps it was finally time to begin
exploring that long-delayed relationship they had once both been so eager to
begin. It wasn't like he had *intentionally* ignored Duo's attempts - he had
simply not recognized them for what they were.
Even though a number of
years had passed since the war, Heero realized that he had not gotten any better
at understanding the subtleties of social interaction. Working 16 hour days
seven days a week didn't exactly leave a lot of time for socializing, and Duo
had always been his guide in those matters in the first place. Now, however,
that had resulted in a distinctly unfamiliar situation. While Duo would eagerly
take him up on any offered time together, it was entirely up to Heero to make
that all-important first move. Duo had been disappointed too many times to risk
it again. Heero winced at the realization that, had he caught on sooner to the
real meaning of that sudden spate of notes left on his desk for him to find on
his return from assignments, neither of them would have ended up in sufficiently
rough shape to be forced into a prolonged vacation. He certainly didn't regret
the vacation time together, but he *did* regret the lonely, nightmare-filled
nights and too-long workdays that had led to it. And he was beginning to have an
awful, sneaking suspicion that the real fault on his part lay even further back
than that.
Over the past week, Heero's efforts had been directed at
simply re-establishing his friendship with Duo. They had spent so little time
together outside of work in the past five years that he had expected to find
changes. The degree of change in Duo, however, was disturbing. From happy,
laughing, and full of energy, Duo had become very solemn, quiet, and subdued.
Heero knew that *he* hadn't been around very often to spend time with Duo, but
was shocked to discover that months had frequently passed without Duo seeing
*any* of his closest friends. The other pilots had all been working ridiculous
hours as well and Hilde had gotten married and caught up in her own life. That
left Une and Sally - both too busy to spend more than a brief lunch break with
him occasionally, Dorothy and Relena - also too busy for more than an occasional
vid-phone call, G, and Howard. While Howard *had* dropped by from time to time,
months tended to pass between his visits as well. Which left G. And while G took
a very paternal interest in Duo, he was more likely to challenge Duo to a game
of chess than a game of basketball, more likely to discuss a potential invention
than the hassles of working with someone years your senior who was nevertheless
your junior in rank. And, as Heero himself had discovered, it was virtually
impossible to make even casual friends with the other Preventers. Even Duo had
finally given up in the face of continual resentment and mistrust, both stemming
from the dual causes of his past as a Gundam pilot and his current high-ranking
status as a very, very youthful Preventer.
'No wonder he said he was
tired of being alone... For all intents and purposes, he's been alone since I
suggested putting our relationship "temporarily" on hold five years ago... And
while I've spent the time alone too, I've never craved social interaction the
way that Duo always has... My request five years ago was made with the best of
intentions, but I guess that old saying about the road to hell being paved with
them is right...'
After returning to the house, Heero decided that since
Duo was far too serious lately, he was going to have to do something about that.
And since Duo also seemed to be waiting for him to make the first move towards
advancing their relationship... Patiently, he waited till Duo passed under a
clump of mistletoe. It didn't take long, Relena and Dorothy had put some over
every doorway in the house and numerous other locations besides. Catching Duo by
the shoulders, Heero directed his attention upwards. "Mistletoe," he said simply
with a grin. Duo's eyes drifted shut as Heero leaned forward and - dropped a
light kiss on the tip of his nose. "Mistletoe tag, you're it!" Heero whispered
with a smirk.
"Why, you..." Duo's eyes snapped open and danced with
surprised laughter as Heero took off for another room. Cheat him out of a proper
kiss then make a run for it, huh? Well, two could definitely play at *that*
game. Tearing down the hall in chase of his elusive partner, Duo collided with
Relena. "Oops, sorry, 'Lena," he apologized.
"What on earth are you up
to, Duo?" she inquired.
"Mistletoe tag," he explained with a
grin.
"Mistletoe *what*?"
"Mistletoe tag. Speaking of which..." he
pointed up above their heads, then gave Relena a quick peck on the cheek, "Tag,
you're it!" On that note, he took off for another room.
Laughing, Relena
headed off in search of someone else to pull into the game.
When Zechs
walked into the house half an hour later, he wondered what on earth all the
shrieks and laughter were about. The sound of running feet echoed through the
mansion. Shaking his head and deciding that he'd probably find out soon enough,
he took off his coat and bent over to remove his boots.
Having been quite
literally dragged into the game of mistletoe tag, Wufei was currently stalking
Duo in an attempt at retaliation. Spotting Zechs bending over to take off his
boots, a distinctly evil smirk crossed Wufei's face. Here was the chance to get
back at him for that kiss earlier. Ignoring the part of his mind that was
demanding to know just how kissing Zechs qualified as "getting back at him",
Wufei waited till Zechs started to straighten up, then pounced. He pressed his
lips to Zechs's in a kiss just as forceful as the one Zechs had planted on him
earlier, then pointed above their heads, explained, "Mistletoe tag - you're it!"
and took off running before Zechs had a chance to gather his wits.
Taking
pity on the stupefied form of her brother, Relena reminded him, "You're 'it',
brother dear. Now you have to catch somebody *else* under the mistletoe and give
them a kiss to tag them!" before taking off again
herself.
************
"They spent most of the afternoon
playing *what*?" Iria asked Rashid in disbelief.
"Mistletoe tag," he
repeated patiently, grinning at the memory. "Obviously the type of kiss varies
depending who you catch, but apparently they were all enjoying themselves
considerably judging by the noise level. You wanted them all to act like the
teenagers they never got to be for a while - well, I would say that they were
following orders this afternoon."
"Mistletoe tag," she murmured
thoughtfully, "I don't think there *is* such a game..."
"There is now,"
Rashid advised her. "The rules are very simple. You can't 'tag' the same person
who tagged you, the person has to be underneath a stationary bit of mistletoe -
no carrying mistletoe around with you, in other words - and you have to give
someone a kiss in order to 'tag' them. Oh, and the staff are *not* part of the
game, or we'd never have got anything done this afternoon." Sobering, he told
Iria, "They *are* all doing much better already. Maria and Antoine have been
keeping them well-fed and sleeping in one room has reduced the nightmares down
to manageable levels for the pilots, though they are certainly not entirely
gone. I don't know what the young men will do when the month is over and they
are alone again, however."
"We'll deal with that when the time comes,"
Iria said, sincerely hoping that things would work out so that it would not be
an issue for at least her baby brother and his best friend by then. If all went
well, Trowa would be staying with Quatre when this was all over with. Rashid's
daily reports seemed to indicate that Heero and Duo might finally be working
things out too. Chang Wufei, however... Well, five colonies, five Gundams, five
pilots - there was only so much she could do given the odd numbers she had to
work with. With Dorothy and Relena already paired up, that left only Zechs, and
he and Wufei simply did *not* get along.
************
Eyes
widening in shock, Duo stared in disbelief for several long moments before
quietly backing out of the room. Apparently Zechs had finally found a way to
stop Wufei in mid-rant. And surprisingly enough, Wufei didn't seem to be
objecting... Duo knew that they'd managed to 'tag' each other several times
during the game of Mistletoe Tag earlier that week, but he'd never imagined...
Shaking his head in disbelief, he headed off to try another room. So far, he'd
run into Relena and Dorothy making out in the sunroom, Quatre and Trowa
'practising' (though it looked an awful lot like making out to *him*) in the
music room, and now Wufei and Zechs caught up in a rather heated-looking kiss in
the games room, pool cues forgotten on the table behind them. Whether it was the
Mistletoe Tag or just the mistletoe itself, he didn't know, but it seemed to be
spreading.
Remembering the Mistletoe Tag was enough to bring a faint
trace of a smile to Duo's mouth. He'd never expected Heero to tease him like
that, and when *he'd* impulsively 'tagged' Relena after running into her, he'd
never expected to turn the afternoon into one full of laughter, mischievous
ambushes, increasingly silly kisses from friends (Trowa had handed him a
chocolate kiss at one point and Zechs had gallantly kissed his hand with a bow
and a flourish like a character in a historical movie at another), and
increasingly teasing and finally outright *hot* kisses from Heero. He was almost
ready to believe that Heero really *was* finally interested in taking their
relationship to the next level, moving from friends to lovers and maybe even
more. 'I'd almost given up. The first year wasn't too bad, the second got pretty
lonely, the third was just plain miserable, and by partway through the fourth, I
finally decided I'd have to take a chance and give him a bit of a nudge. When
the fifth year rolled around... I don't even wanna think about it... Maybe my
notes really *were* too subtle a hint for him to pick up on and he *didn't* mean
to indicate that he just wasn't interested anymore... A year of leaving
increasingly frequent notes on his desk with only a handful of actual
get-togethers to show for it is kinda hard to just forget about,
though...'
Finally locating Heero watching a movie in the lounge, Duo
said, "Hey, 'Ro. Whatcha watchin'?" Somewhat cautiously, he waited for an
indication of welcome before moving any further into the room. Heero didn't
waste any time giving him one, rising and striding across the room to pull him
into a deep kiss. "Mmm, nice..." Duo sighed as they drew apart again. "What's
with all the kisses lately?" he asked as Heero tugged him towards the
couch.
"Blame it on the mistletoe," Heero suggested, snickering. "There's
certainly enough of it to take the blame..."
Glancing back at where he
had been standing, Duo pointed out, "But there wasn't any over
there..."
"That's why we moved over *here*," Heero told him, pointing at
the large ball of the stuff hanging directly over the couch. "I think my boring
movie just got a lot more interesting," he whispered in Duo's ear, the tickle of
his breath sending shivers of anticipation through Duo.
"Good," Duo
whispered back, "'cause I'd hate to see you gettin' bored on your vacation." As
he willingly responded to Heero's next kiss, Duo let a little bit more hope
creep in. Maybe it wasn't too late. Maybe they hadn't missed their chance at
happiness.
************
Firelight glinted off mingled
strands of golden brown and platinum blonde. Her head tucked against Dorothy's
shoulder, Relena said softly, "I don't want to pretend you're just my press
secretary anymore, Doro. We've long since passed the point where either of us
was likely to change our minds about this. I'm not ashamed of what we have
together and I don't care what anyone else thinks."
"It could cost you
your political career," Dorothy warned, reluctant to discourage something she
wanted too but too loyal to Relena's best interests to let her ignore the
facts.
"I don't care. The most important laws have already been pushed
through and it would take years and years of challenges to get them repealed.
Same with the existence of the Preventers - they can't be dissolved without a
majority vote from *each* colony's government and *each* regional Earth
government *plus* the United Earth Sphere government. I've done nothing but work
for peace since before I was sixteen. I think I'm entitled to have my own life
while I'm still young enough to enjoy it."
"What about your mother?"
Dorothy asked softly, hesitant to bring up a sore subject but well aware that it
had to be faced.
Straightening away from Dorothy, Relena stared into the
fire, hands clenching into fists and face hardening grimly. "She requested that
I call her *Mrs Darlian*, remember? She made her feelings on the subject of you
and I perfectly clear when she caught us together the last time she visited."
Forcing her hands flat again, Relena said more calmly, "She's made her choice.
Her own petty prejudices have condemned her to a lonely life. If she ever
changes her mind and apologizes to both of us, I'll welcome her back with open
arms. Otherwise - well, the only other people either of us actually care about
have already made their acceptance clear. My brother may not want to hear about
my 'sex life', but he's made it perfectly clear to me that if you make me happy,
that's all that matters to him. The pilots accept us, and I've never heard so
much as an implied criticism from Une or Sally. They're all the family that
we'll ever need."
Shifting so that she was the one leaning against Relena
this time, Dorothy observed casually, "You know, the media would be far more
tolerant of a legally-recognized relationship than an unofficial
one."
"If that's supposed to be a proposal, my dear Miss Catalonia, it's
the most *un*romantic one I think I've ever heard," Relena commented drily. "But
a very small, very private Christmas Eve wedding, complete with horse-drawn
sleigh, *would* be rather nice."
"Christmas Eve?" Dorothy quickly counted
off the days on her fingers to make sure there was enough time to handle the
legalities. "I'll have to see what can be arranged."
"You do that,"
Relena answered, lifting her companion's face to brush a kiss across her lips.
"You just go right ahead and do that."
************
"Hey,
Heero, you in here?" Duo called, peeking around the corner of the library door.
"If you're busy already, it's okay, but I kinda had somethin' I'd like some help
with if you're not..." he said hesitantly as Heero set his book
aside.
"No, I'm just killing some time," Heero answered, extending one
hand in silent invitation.
Duo promptly joined him on the couch, curling
against Heero's side in what was becoming an increasingly familiar manner.
"There's still no snow in the forecast, but it's s'posed to stay well below
freezing right through Christmas, so I was wonderin' if we could try something I
read about one time. Iria's got us all scheduled to go ice skating in a few
days, but I'm not lookin' forward to tryin' that for the first time in public.
There was a book I read that talked about buildin' a frame out of wood, linin'
it with plastic, then coverin' the plastic-lined bottom with water. Once the
water freezes, you add more, and keep repeatin' the process till you've got a
good few inches deep of ice. Voila, a private skating rink! The lawn's pretty
level at the end of the house that's protected from the prevailing
winds..."
Intrigued by the idea - as well as grateful to have Duo showing
enough confidence in him to ask *him* to take part in an activity together for
once instead of the other way around - Heero asked, "Have you spoken to Rashid
yet? We'll probably have to go to town to get some supplies to build it with,
but he'll be able to tell us whether there's anything here that we can use or
not..."
"Then you'll help?" Duo asked, amethyst eyes sparkling with
delight.
Firmly quashing the desire to cheer at finally seeing something
approaching Duo's old joy in life displayed on that expressive face, Heero said,
"Of course! It sounds interesting to try even if it doesn't work perfectly. And
I'm not too thrilled about learning to skate in public either."
Stopping
in the midst of tugging Heero to his feet, Duo exclaimed, "Oh shit! I wonder if
*any* of us know how to skate?! And I guess we'll kinda have to *have* skates,
won't we?"
"Bet Iria never even thought of that," Heero smirked. "Guess
we have a *number* of things to pick up in
town..."
************
Duo was delighted to discover that
the private skating rink trick actually worked quite well. The lack of snow
meant that they didn't even have to worry about clearing the ice prior to
re-flooding it, and they had ended up with a reasonably smooth, even ice
surface. In the end, it had turned out that Relena, Dorothy, and Zechs could all
skate quite well. Quatre was passable and Trowa - well, to someone used to
walking tightropes, picking up ice skating was a breeze. Duo had roller-bladed
with borrowed equipment a few times at schools back during the war and, after a
few false starts, found that the skills transferred over reasonably well. With
the benefit of his martial arts training to help with balance, Heero had picked
up the knack extremely quickly as well. Which made Wufei's apparent difficulty
and tendency to cling to Zechs for support decidedly suspicious.
"How
much longer till they admit what's going on?" Quatre asked Duo, shaking his head
in disbelief as Wufei 'tripped' and fell into Zechs's arms yet
again.
"Don't ask me, I find the whole idea of those two together so
incredibly *bizarre* that I don't even wanna *think* about it."
"How are
things going for you and Heero?" Quatre asked, checking first to be sure that
Heero was still concentrating on the quick lesson in stopping safely that Relena
was giving him.
Duo hesitated, almost afraid to put his hopes into words
for fear of jinxing them. "Okay, I guess," he admitted, "but I'm tryin' not to
get my hopes up too high. We're about back to the point we were at five years
ago." His very real fear that, having reached that point, Heero would back off
again was left unspoken. Quatre had enough worries about his own slowly
deepening relationship with Trowa without taking on Duo's as well.
"How
'bout you, Q? Tro comin' along nicely?"
Quatre gave Duo a beautiful
smile, "Oh yes. Which reminds me, I think that pretty soon we're going to have
to work out some sort of schedule for the shared sleeping quarters so we don't
all desert Wufei at once."
"Uh - yeah, I guess so," Duo responded. He
wasn't too sure that would be necessary too quickly. Heero hadn't really even
hinted at taking things that far yet and he was too afraid of ruining what they
had now to bring the subject up himself. This was beginning to remind him
ominously of the days leading up to Heero's "request" five years ago. 'If he
decides to back off again, I don't know *what* I'll do. If I give him an
ultimatum, I might lose him for good. But if he doesn't follow through this
time, I don't know if I can stand to go back to bein' alone again for *another*
five years...'