The Official MIKE SCHULTZ Webpage
Real Ultimate Power
Hi, this site is all about MIKE SCHULTZ, REAL MIKE SCHULTZ. This site is awesome. My name is Josh and I can't stop thinking about MIKE SCHULTZ. This guy is cool; and by cool, I mean totally sweet.
Facts:
1. Mike Schultz is a mammal.
2. Mike Schultz stocks dairy ALL the time.
3. The purpose of Mike Schultz is to flip out and stock dairy
Weapons and gear:
Box Cutter Milk Crates
Wooden Pallet
Testimonial:
Mike Schultz can kill anyone that he wants! Mike Schultz stocks dairy ALL the time and doesn't even think twice about it. This guy is so crazy and awesome that he flips out ALL the time. I heard that there was this customer shopping in his isle. The customer asked where milk was and Mike Schultz flipped out and killed everyone in Catskill. My friend Jason said that he saw Mike Schultz totally nutshot some customer just because the customer opened a yogurt container.
And that's what I call REAL Ultimate Power!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
If you don't believe that Mike Schultz has REAL Ultimate Power you better get a life right now or he'll kick your ass!!! It's an easy choice, if you ask me.
Mike Schultz is sooooooooooo sweet that I want to crap my pants. I can't believe it sometimes, but I feel it inside my heart. This guy is totally awesome and that's a fact. Mike Schultz is fast, smooth, cool, strong, powerful, and sweet. I can't wait to start working at Price Chopper next year. I love Mike Schultz with all of my body (including my pee pee).
Q and A:.
Q: Why is everyone so obsessed about Mike Schultz?
A: Mike Schultz is the ultimate paradox. On the one hand he doesn't give a crap, but on the other hand, Mike Schultz is very careful and precise.
Q: I heard that Mike Schultz is always cruel or mean. What's his problem?
A: Whoever told you that is a total liar. Just like other mammals, Mike Schultz can be mean OR totally awesome.
Q: What does Mike Schultz do when he's not stocking dairy or flipping out?
A: Most of his free time is spent flying, but sometimes he stabs. (Ask Jason if you don't believe me.)
here is an artistic rendition of Mike Schultz.
This picture was drawn by Jason Smith, he's older than me and is almost done with puberty
which is bragable.
