(( The PPV begins as an intro is being played on the screens of millions of viewers at home....the intro begins...))
Announcer: Tonight, five men go for the most coveted prize in our sport...
((a shot of the world title comes on the screen))
Announcer: The HWC World Heavyweight title!!
(( screen cuts to a multishot of the five men involved))
Announcer: A man who wants to purify the federation..
(( Cuts to a shot of Justice giving someone the Judgement Day))
Announcer:...A man who will stop at nothing to save a friend...
(( Cuts to a shot of Dark Twilight attacking Twilight in the boiler room))
Announcer: One man going for the glory...
(( Cuts to Kidd Rock showboating for the crowd))
Announcer: Another man trying to gain respect...
(( Cuts to Tru Soldja giving Brett Bruiser the Soldja Bomb through three tables))
Announcer: ...And a man on the brink of insanity.
(( Cuts to Kash Flagg hitting Deluxe in the head with a shovel ))
Announcer: Two of these Five men will be going for the gold at...BAD MOON RISING!!!!!!
(( The camera cuts to the arena wher HUGE explosions are set off....the crowd is going absolutely nuts as shots of the fans are shown....one older man with a sign that says "Ride the Train..everyone else has!!" is specially shown by the cameras. The cameras cut to Eddie Danniels and Travis Best at the announcer's table. Eddie is in a traditional Tuxedo and Travis is just in jeans and a t-shirt that says "Simply the BEST!!"
Eddie: Welcome fans to our FIRST Pay Per View....Bad Moon Rising!!!!! I am Eddie Daniels and with me at ringside, the fashion statement hinself, Travis Best.
Travis: What is up with the monkey suit??? You trying to get a ring rat to take to the prom or something??
Eddie: Well we can't all be fashion disasters like you. Besides, this is a very special event, for tonight we will crown a NEW HWC World Heavyweight Champion!!
Travis: For once I agree. Not only do we have that, we have the tag titles on the line as the DOD is taking on the Anihlation Nation!!
Eddie: And don't forget the IC match between...
(( The crowd looks up towards the rafters and the figure of Kash Flagg looms over the crowd.))
Travis: Look it's Kash Flagg!!!!!
(( Kash has a mic in his hand as he speaks...))
Kash: ahhhhh..such a pleasant view from up here. It kinda makes all you people down there look like ants....it makes me want to step on you over and over and OVER!!!
(( The crowd boos loudly at Kash...))
Kash: Tonight tonight tonight....one night only....watch the do-gooders and the nay sayers all meet their demise to the man you call insane...I don't think I'm insane...I think I'm the saniest one of all!!!!!
(( The crowd gasps as Kash suddenly hangs on the rafters...then jumps back on the platform..))
Kash: Heights never did scare me....i wonder how high I can fly tonight...(laughs)...enjoy the show children.....I need to give my "friends" a warm reception..
((The lights cut off and then suddenly come back on....Kash is no where to be seen...camera cuts back to the announcers table))
Travis: I wonder what he meant by giving his friends a warm reception??
Eddie: I don't know with that psycho, but let's not waste time and get to our first match!!
(( Camera cuts to the ring announcer inside the ring...))
**Some upbeat dance music and lights and pyro start, and the Superstar
walks out to the ring. He climbs in and dances around and poses, getting
a few cheers.**
Ring Announcer: Introducing first,from Warren Michigan, weighing in at
152 pounds, The Superstar!
Eddie: Well, we don't know much about this guy, but he's going to have his hands full with the monstrous Bulldozer!
Travis: 152 pounds?? This kid is gonna be eaten alive!!
**suddenly, "Falling Away From Me" blares over the PA, and Superstar
stops dancing, looking toward the entranceway, but doesn't see
anybody.**
Ring Announcer: His oponnent, from Rock Hill, South Carolina, weighing
in at 345 pounds, The Bulldozer!!!
**Bulldozer suddenly charges out and slides into the ring, where Superstar is waiting for him**
Eddie: Boy, is Bulldozer ever ready!
Travis: When ya got Lavey backing you up...you should be ready!!!
Eddie: Superstar stomps Dozer in the back, but Dozer is up...Superstar with an Irish whip....no, reversed, Superstar bounces off the ropes, Dozer with a clothesline, but Superstar ducks, and goes for a cross body, but Dozer catches him in mid-air! He just hit him with a BIG back breaker, and Superstar is in trouble here!
Travis: Looks like the superstar needs a superchiropracter.
Eddie: Dozer picks him up by his hair, and hoists him up...BRAINBUSTER!!!
Travis: Don't you have to HAVE a brain to have it called that??
Eddie: Dozer with the cover...
one...
TWO...
....superstar kicks out just in the nick of time.
Travis: Bulldozer seems to be having an easy time with the superdud.
Eddie: That's SUPERSTAR, Travis. Dozer picks him up...Inside cradle by Superstar!
One...
TWO... Dozer just kicked out in time!
Eddie:Superstar picks Dozer up, and drops a leg across Dozer's neck.
Travis: Seem like the small fry is getting the upper hand...
Eddie: Oh my god! Dozer is in trouble now, as the newcomer seems to
have the upper hand...
Travis: Do you even LISTEN when I talk??
Eddie: What did you say Travis?? Anyways Superstar heading for the top rope now...he's going for a moonsault....NOBODY HOME! Dozer moved!
Travis: Mission control...the Superstar has crashed..(laughs)
Eddie: Dozer getting up, shaking off the cobwebs...Superstar trying to get to his feet.Dozer is up first, grabs Superstar, whips him into the ropes and hits with a big time powerslam!
Travis: Looks like the end of superstar dudley.
Eddie: Superstar is in trouble.I beleive Dozer looks like he smells victory. Bulldozer picks Superstar up...Uh oh, could it be? HE HIT THE DEMOLITION! That's gotta be it...
One...
Two...
THREE! It's over!!!
Travis: And the Superstar's debut turns into a box office bomb.
Eddie: Oh and this just disgusts me....Justice has come out here and they are just beating on Superstar. This is just disgusting!!
Travis: That's what you get for messing with the Unholy Alliance.
Eddie: Justice just hit the Judgement Day on Superstar!!!! He's out cold and...WAIT!!! It's Kash!!!
Travis: Kash has a huge piece of wood and he just broke it over Dozer's back!!!!! Lavey and Justice have already jumped out of the ring!!
Eddie: It looks like Lavey has the mic.
(( Camera cuts to Justice holding up Dozer , with Lavey with the mic.
Lavey: Flagg!!!! Tonight, what we did to you a few weeks ago will be NOTHING compared to what we will do to you tonight!! Your Purification is at hand!!!!!!
(( Lavey drops the mic and they help Dozer to the back))
Eddie: And what is shocking here is that Kash is helping Superstar up!!
Travis: This just looks odd...
Eddie: I agree. Kash raises Superstar's hand....OH MY GOD!!! Kash just hit Superstar with some Kold Hard Kash!!
Travis: I Love it!!!!! You gotta love Cpt. Insano there.
Eddie: *shakes head* While we get the ring cleaned up, lets go to Chris Murphy backstage with Brett Bruiser!!
(( Camera cuts to the backstage area near the concession stand. Chris Murphy is standing next to the Limit Breakers))
Chris: Tonight you defend your newly won TV title against the number one contender Deluxe. What is your gameplan??
Brett: Gameplan?? What gameplan do I need from a coward who won't even show himself?? I don't need a gameplan. The only plan I have is to beat that little spell check needing bitch a lesson!!
(( Bruiser shoves Chris out of the way and goes back to the dressing rooms. Chris spots Kidd Rock at the snackbar))
Chris: Kidd!!! Can we get aword from yo..
Kidd: Not right now, I got some buisness to take care of here. Hey cook!!! get your ass here NOW!!
(( Smackdaddy, in a paper hat, comes to the window))
Smackdaddy: What the HELL do you want??
Kidd: These damn nachos are stale!!! I want my money back!!
Smackdaddy: Why don't you shut up biotch!! Just give the nachos to some of your welfare family you cheap ass...
(( Before he could finish, Kidd Rock smashes the nachos in smacks face))
Kidd: (laughing) Thats the best you have ever looked!!! You should keep the look!! (laughs hard)
(( The camera shows Kidd walking off laughing his ass off as Smackdaddy is being held back by all the other employees. The shot goes back to Eddie and Travis ))
Eddie: I don't think it was smart of Kidd to mock Smackdaddy like that.
Travis: (laughing so hard he can barely stop from crying) HAHAHAHAHAHA...did you see....the nacho cheese dripping off him!!!HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAH!!!! (falls off his chair onto the floor laughing)
Eddie: (looking down at Travis..shakes head and looks back up) Folks we will be back as soon as Travis can control his bowel movements here.
(( a commercial begins...a family is sitting at the table. The mother and father are speaking..))
mother: So honey, how was your day??
father: Et wuz heel. Won of the gies called ento werk and eye hadda due his werk two.
mom: Hon..I can't understand a damn word you are saying.
Announcer's voice: Has this happend to you?? Do you have a problem with "talking right?" Do the kids at school call you "spell check sammy?" Well take those blues away and give your love ones the gift they need....
(( cuts to a shot of an weird looking ring))
Announcer's voice: The Deluxe Decoder Ring!!!!!! Now you too can understrand what the hell your loved ones are saying!!
((Camera cuts back to the table where the mother and father are speaking...she has the deluxe decoder ring on))
mother: So honey how was work today?
dad: Et wuzotay. Juz tire frum werkking two herd.
(( The mother presses the button on her decoder ring))
monotone voice: It was okay. Just tired from working too hard.
mother: (smiling) Thank you Deluxe Decoder Ring!!!
father: Yes, thnk ewe. knoe babie, cummer and givme a hog!!
((The couple hug each other as the scene cuts to Deluxe holding up his ring...with a cheesy grin on his face))
Deluxe: Yes, bye the Delux Deecolder Reng today!!! Eye indorse it!!!
(( The camera cuts back to the crowd...all laughing loudly. Cuts to Eddie and Travis back at the announcer's table.))
Eddie: What some people won't do for money anymore.....
Travis: I was talking to that fat woman behind ya Eddie, and she said she'd show ya a good time for 3.50 plus some hot dogs.
Eddie: Travis!!!!!I am a happily married man!!!!
Travis: The larger the lady...the more cushion for pushin...
Eddie: Travis just shut up!! Let's just get to our next match!!
((camera cuts to the announcer in the ring))
Announcer: This is for the HWC TV championship!! (cheers) First from new York New York.....Major Deluxe!!
(( Deluxe walks ot the ring ducking and dodging flying debris from the crowd))
Announcer: And the Champion...from Raliegh North Carolina...Brett Bruiser!!
(( The crowd cheers loudly as The Limit Breakers make it down to the ring. Brett looks at Deluxe and laughs. He motions for Dark Angel to go to the back and he does.))
Eddie: Brett seems confident that he's going to beat Deluxe easily.
Travis: I seem pretty confident too...I mean the guy just plain sucks!!!
Eddie: None of the athletes here have ever sucked.
Travis: How about the Train??
Eddie: Ok he's the exception....anyways it looks like the match has begun and Brett gets the early advantage with some well placed punches to Deluxes head.
Travis: Like that had any effect....
Eddie: Brett throws Deluxe into the turnbuckle...he's going for a flying splash....and he connects!!!
Travis: and deluxe goes down......TIMMMMMMMMBEEEEEEEERRRRRRR!! (laugh)
Eddie: Brett goes to the top...he's waiting for deluxe to get up...and he connects with a top rope bulldog!!!
Travis: He's wasting no time in getting rid of the big dumb piggy.
Eddie: He's going for a bodyslam....but Deluxe falls on him!!! Brett seems to still be suffering from that fall at Warzone!! The ref is counting...
one...
...and Brett easily kicks out.
Travis: i wonder if that fall made him as loopy as Kash??
Eddie: I don't think anyone is as loopy as Kash...Brett gets up...and is met with a thundering clothesline by the pig...I mean the big man!!
Travis: HA!! You almost said piggy!!
Eddie: slip of the toungue...that's all. Deluxe now has Brett in a bearhug!! God that looks like it has to hurt being squeezed in those arms...
Travis: I know...I just asked his girlfriend and she said the same thing.
Eddie: I swear you have a death wish sometimes Best. Back to action, Deluxe still has the bearhug on Brett...but brett pokes deluxe in the eyes!! What a cheap tactic!!
Travis: When in doubt, go for the three stooges method...works everytime.
Eddie: Why I outta...Brett throws Deluxe intot he ropes and hits witha picture perfect spinebuster. Wait..he's motioning for the table outside!!! The people want to see wood!!
Travis: Hey only the ladies can see my wood you perv.
Eddie: Not YOU!!! I'm talking about the table outside, Brett is going for the table!!!! The ref is not allowing the table!!!
Travis: Oh god...here comes Bob Saget!!
Eddie: What is Saget doing?? He is up on the apron and he's arguing with the ref!! Look at Brett!!!!! He has that table set up....he grabs Deluxe....OH MY GOD!!! Bruiser Bomb!!!! Bruiser Bomb through the table!!!
Travis: Deluxe just shattered that table into toothpicks for the whole audience!!
Eddie: Brett is kicking whats left of the table outside and Saget jumps down off the apron. The ref turns around and see Brett making the pin attempt!!
1...
2...
....3!!!!! Brett Bruiser Has succesfully defended his TV Title in impressive fashion!!
Travis: Look That moron Saget is in the ring with Deluxe!!! Deluxe is slowly getting up here..it looks like Saget has the mic.
((camera cuts to Bob Saget with the mic))
Bob: I got a little going away present for you Major Deluxe with cheese.
(( Bob pulls out a see and spell and breaks it over Deluxes head...knocking Deluxe out))
Bob: Learn to spell next time..you...you...WEINER!!!
(( The crowd roars with approval as Bob jumps on the turnbuckle for his fans...he falls off of course))
Eddie: That was the weirdest thing I have ever seen...
Travis: That was GREAT!!! Good riddence I say...worthless no talent wrestler.
Eddie: We will be right back with the tag team title match as the DOD take on the Annihlation Nation!!
(( Camera cuts to the darken rafters as Kash sits alone..rocking back and forths...))
Kash: ...I will fly...I believe I can fly....
Voice: so do I Kash...tonight we will show them...
Kash: If I don't make it out tonight....I pass the torch to you....you will be the true face of evil...
Voice: Don't talk like that Kash...You'll be ok..
Kash: I'll never be ok....something will happen tonight....just be prepared for the worst..
((Kash continues to rock back and forths as you hear the sounds of someone leaving...))
Kash: I can fly...yes..yes I can....
(( The camera cuts to a commercial for the Bruno Von Gotch Sr. Wrestling school....teaching all the old time values without all that disgusting sex and violence stuff. Call 1-888-NO FRILL for details.))
Eddie: We are back and up next is the World Tag Team titles up for grabs as the DOD take on the Annihlation Nation!!
Travis: With Judge being a goody two shoes and Justice totally off his rocker with Lavey...you have to wonder how well this team will perform.
Eddie: I never thought of that...
Travis: Of course not, that's what I'm here for...to inform the simpletons like you. (smiles)
Eddie: *sigh* The office must hate me....let's just get to the ring.
((The camera cuts to the ring...the Annhilation Nation is in the ring))
Announcer: This match is for the HWC tag team championships of the world!!! (loud cheers) First...the opponents, already in the ring, Scorpion and the "Ice Dragon" Jason Reed...the Annilation Nation!!!
(( The crowd boos loudly as the AN makes threats towards the fans))
Announcer: And the Champions....Justice and the Judge...the Destroyers of Darkness!!
(( Justice comes out first with Lavey, which starts off a chorus of boos. Then finally Judge comes out to a HUGE pop from the crowd))
Eddie: I noticed that Judge walked alone there on his way to the ring.
Travis: Maybe because he's too STUPID to realize what a great leader Lavey is.
Eddie: Great leader?? That man is pure evil travis and you know it.
Travis: His ways may be different than mine...but he always picks up the checks.
Eddie: Travis, there is no hope for you. Let's get to the action as Scorpion and Judge are starting off. Scorpion just starts wailing away at Judge...but it seems to have no effect!!!
Travis: I tell ya it's the Judgster!!
Eddie: Not THAT crap again!! Judge pushes Scorpion down and turns towards his partner...who's not even paying attention!!!!
Travis: He's just getting some last minute advice from his mentor.
Eddie: What he's doing is pissing off Judge...but Scorpion comes up behind him and...low blow!! What a cheap way to gain the advantage!!
Travis: And that cheap way seems to have worked, as the Judgster is laying on the mat holding his jewels.
Eddie: Justice FINALLY turns around and sees his partner in pain...wait Jason reed is getting in the ring and they are double teaming Judge!!! Justice is just standing there not even trying to help him!!!
Travis: Well Justice is about being fair and playing by the rules...
Eddie: You are the LAST person to be talking about rules!! Scorpion and Reed have the big man up..and a double suplex onto the mat. These two maniacs are stomping the hell outta Judge, and finally ref Walter Powell gets Reed back out of the ring.
Travis: Oh yeah when the action gets good, dumbass Powell has to ruin it!!
Eddie: Scorpion tags in Reed and Reed instantly goes to work kicking on the much bigger Judge. reed's motioning for the ropes, and he looks like he's going for a flying headbutt....but Judge puts his foot up!!! Reed just jumped into Judge's boot!!!!
Travis: He just got a whole mouthfull of sole there!!! That HAD to hurt!!
Eddie: And you call ME a simpleton!! Judge is crawling back to make the tag and ...I don't beleive this!!! Justice is on the floor talking to Lavey!!! What is up with Justice!!??
Travis: I don't know...but it looks like Judge is screwed!!
Eddie: Reed tags in Scotpion and he hits a leaping axhandle on the crawling Judge...sending him straight to the mat. And now Look at Justice...with his hand out for the tag...this is a joke!!
Travis: If it's a joke, then I don't think Judge is laughing much. These guys are pounding him!!
Eddie: I don't know how much more Judge can take....Powell gets Reed out of the ring and Scorpion hits a perfect bulldog on Judge!! What is Scorpion doing?? He's motioning for the top rope!!
Travis: After watching what happend to Reed, I think this is a mistake...
Eddie: Judge is starting to get up..but he's in a daze...Scorpion is on the top rope..he jumps...INTO JUDGES HAND!!!
Travis: I told you....that only means one thing...
Eddie: CHOKESLAM!! Judge hits tremendous chokeslam to Scorpion, and he's AGAIN heading back to his corner for the tag...Judge has got to be worn out from this brutal beating he's been taking.
Travis: Hell, the beating's so bad, if it wasn't in the ring it would be illegal!!
Eddie: Judge makes it to the corner...and Justice looks like he's adjusting his kneepads!!! Here comes Scorpion and Reed again and Judge is fighting them off!!!
Travis: (singing) i got the eye of the tigerrrrrr...
Eddie: STOP THAT!! Justice is back on the apron..Jusde is punching Scorpion...then Reed...then Scorpion...Judge turns around and sees Justice...and PUNCHES HIM!!!!!! Judge just punched Justice and Justice falls off the mat into Lavey!!
Travis: What is he thinking??!!! He's one half of the tag team champs!!
Eddie: Judge he left the ring!!! He's taking his belt and walking away!!!
Judge just walked away from the match!! Justice gets in the ring and gets double teamed by the AN...wait Lavey is on the apron arguing with the ref...LOOK!!! Klaus Van Hammer !!!
Travis: haven't seen the German Nightmare lately!! He's in the ring and the AN dont know it!!
Eddie: The AN turn around....DOUBLE SPEAR!!!! Klaus just speared BOTH Scorpion and Reed!!! Klaus is back out of the ring...Justice has Scorpion set up...and hits the Judgement Day!!! he goes for the pin..
1....
2....
....3!!!! The DOD has reatained their belts...but there seems to be no more DOD!!!
Travis: Oh great, we have a tag team who can't even stand each other as the world tag champs!!
Eddie: I'm getting word the Chris Murphy is catching up to Judge right now!!!
(( Camera cuts to Chris Murphy backstage...running after Judge.))
Chris: *panting* Jud...Judge...why did you leave in the middle of the match like that??
Judge: You want to know why?? you want to know WHY??? BECAUSE JUSTICE HAS HIS HEAD SO FAR UP LAVEY'S ASS THAT THE SON OF A BITCH DIDN'T HELP ME!!! Today is the day i vow to rid this federation of Cypress Lavey!!
(( Judge throws the mic back to Chris and storms off. Camera cuts back to Eddie and Travis.))
Eddie: This is going to spell bad news for Lavey...I have NEVER seen the big man this angry.
Travis: I'm not a fan of the Judge...but the man is 7'6"!! That's a man you simply don't mess with.
Eddie: We have to pause here for a quick break, but coming up next is the IC title match between Jaguar and the demented Hellraizer!!
(( The camera cuts to a commercial for the Bad Moon Rising shirt...with the matches printed on the back. Only $19.99 plus shipping and handling.))
Eddie: We are back folks and we are only HALFWAY into this great PPV!! We still have the World title tourney semi's to go....but right now we are going to Chris Murphy, who has that diabolical Hellraizer with him now...take it away Chris!!
Travis: Gee thanks for hogging up all the..
(( The cuts from Travis' rant to the backstage area as a very nervous looking Chris stands next to Hellraizer))
Chris: After what went down at Warzone with you causing Brett's fall through the triple cage, what evil plan do you have tonight for Jaguar??
Hellraizer: Ahhhh, what a glorious fall it was wasn't it Chris?? The way his head bounced after going through each one of the cages....ahhh a glorious fall indeed.
Chris: Ummm...well....How do you plan to win against jaguar, who's just come off a vaction and is primed and ready to go??
Hellraizer: You underestimate evil too much Chris...You know when I need a little guidence...I simply just look above and I get guidence...
((Hellraizer simply walks off, as Chris just stands there with a confused look on his face. The camera cuts back to Eddie and Travis, who look just as confused))
Eddie: Guidence from above?? You don't think he means....well you know..the BIG GUY??
Travis: Who else do you think he meant?? My guidence conseler was like only 5'5", and gave me no guidence whatsoever....(muttering) worthless old windbag.
Eddie: Travis, let's stop dealing in childhood trauma and let get to the ring fo the next match!!!
(( The camera cuts to inside the ring as the announcer gets ready to speak))
Announcer: This next bout is for the HWC IC title!! (really loud cheers) First the challenger....from parts unknown...Hellraizer!!!!
(( Hell is Hot plays as Hellraizer comes to the ring among a large chorus of boos. He wears an evil grin on his face))
Travis: Look at this guy!! Lt. Loco here is happy that he's about to get his ass beat!!
Announcer: and his opponent...the current HWC IC champion, from Chicago Il....Jaguar!!!!
(( Break Stuff plays as Jaguar and Jessica come out to a huge pop from the audience ))
Eddie: Hellraizer is wasting no time as he is all over Jaguar!!! Raizer goes to the ropes and Jag catches him and hits a slingshot onto the top rope !!!
Travis: That'll take the winds out of your sails there...
Eddie: Jaguar picks up Hellraizer and throws him into the ropes...Jag tried for a clothsline but Raizer ran under it...Jag turns around and Hellraizer hits a Lou Thesz press on Jag!!!! How the hell did Raizer know how to do a Lou Thesz press??
Travis: A better question is how does he know who Lou Thesz is?? He's like a million years old!!
Eddie: Respect your elders Best. Raizer si back up and getting some vicious kicks to Jaguar's head there.
Travis: It looks like Raizer is playing kick the can with Jag's head (laughs)
Eddie: I swear you are as demented as they are sometimes Travis. Raizer goes for a russian leg sweep, but Jag stops it and gets behind Raizer for a beautiful belly to back suplex. Jaguar runs into the ropes and a dropkick across the back of Raziers head as he just sat there!!!
Travis: Jaguar is playing smart here by staying on Hellraizer...that way he can end the match quicker.
Eddie: So true Travis. Jaguar has Hellraizer in what looks to be a fisherman's suplex, or a perfectplex....He has him up and...drives his head into the mat!!!!
Travis: It looks like Raizer will be picking canvas out of his teeth for some time there.
Eddie: Taizer is in trouble as jaguar goes for the pin...
1...
2...
...and Hellraizer just got his shoulder up!! That was almost a three!!
Travis: Lt. Loco still has some loco juice left in him....
Eddie: Jaguar runs into the ropes and straight at the groggy Raizer...Jaguar is trying for a hurricanrana, but Raizer just turned it into a sit down powerbomb!!! Both men are lying on the mat!!
Travis: NOW'S not the time for napping...someone needs to get up!!!!
Eddie: It looks like it's going to be Hellraizer as he is heading for the ropes!! He is waiting for Jaguar to get up...Jaguar is back on his feet...and Hellraizer jumps and hits a top rope stunner!!!! What a move!!!
Travis: It looks like we may have a new IC champion here..
Eddie: Hellraizer seems to agree as he goes for the cover...
1...
2...
....and Jessica put Jag's foot on the ropes!! Hellraizer is livid!!!
Travis: It shows as he has the bimbo by the hair...I don't condone what she did, but I don't condone what Raizer's evil mind may be thinking to do to her!!
Eddie: I knew you had some morals there Travis!!
Travis: SHHHHHHHHHHH!!! I don't want to get a bad reputation here!!
Eddie: Hellraizer has Jessica on the apron and looks like he's going to hit her!!!!! NO!!!!! Wait!!! Jaguar comes up behind him and a rollup!!!
1...
2...
...3!!! He may have had a handfull of tights but Jaguar successfully defends his IC title....Jaguar is celebrating in the ring...Raizer has slipped outside and is pointing at the ceiling for some odd reason..
Travis: To steal a line from you OH MY GOD!!! Someone is coming down from the rafters...and it sure isn't Sting!!!
Eddie: It's Kash Flagg!!! Flagg was the Guidence!!! and Helrraizer was the voice we heard talking Kash earlier!!! Jaguar doesn't know Flagg is coming down!!! Kash is on the ground and unhooked it seems and they both run into the ring!!!
Travis: Man they are beating Jaguar like a red headed stepchild or Deluxes mom after his father found out what a loser his son is.
Eddie: They got jaguar handcuffed to the ropes...Kash has a case with him what could it....OH GOD NO!!! He has a cattle prod!!! He's about to electrocute Jaguar....wait...who's coming out of the crowd???
Travis: The Anglemaster!!!!! It's Saxon!!!!
Eddie: It is!!!! Steve Saxon is in the ring and cleaning house!!! Kash and Hellraizer are out of the ring...Kash seems to have a look of shock on his face at seeing an old ghost!!! And listen to the ovation for Steve Saxon!!
Travis: What?? I can't hear a damn word you are saying?? Maybe if I get my Deluxe Decoder Ring...
Eddie: Don't bother, we will return after this for the semi finals for the World Heavyweight Title!!
(( Camera cuts to an old style gym...Bruno Von Gotch Jr. is working out in the ring applying a side headlock on an un named jobber. He sees the camera and gets up. He shakes the jobbers hand and goes to the camera...))
Bruno: Now THAT'S real wrestling!! You know I watch wrestling today and it just makes me sick!! All these half naked ladies and people using barbed wire and junk...darn it, it's not REAL wrestling!!!
(( Bruno steps outside the ring and cleans the sweat off himself with a towel..))
Bruno: REAL wrestling is a game of human chess.....move...countermove...not about who can swear 150 times in one interview!!! I watch some of the so called "wrestlers' here and they are nothing more than overglorified maniacs!!! You got Kash Flagg, who's burying people alive and burning things down!! You got You got men like Smackdaddy where every other word is fuc...I can't even say that foul word. That's why I am here.... To place more emphasis on the SPORTS part of sports entertainment....just remember, if I wrestle...they will come..
((Bruno takes a drink of his water..))
Bruno: Cause I'm Bruno Von Gotch Jr. darn it!!!
(( Bruno walks away as the camera cuts back to Eddie and Travis at the announcer's table))
Eddie: It looks like we got ourselves and old school enthusiast here.
Travis: "If i wrestle.....they will sleep.."
Eddie: Travis show some respect for the man!!!
Travis: zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz...
Eddie: Travis I just don't know what to do with you. Anyways, ladies and gentlemen, we'd like to bring you the first of the
semifinal matches in the World Title Tourney. This should be one hell of a matchup.
Travis: These two have been allies but since Kash seems to be a couple
sandwiches short of a picnic, who knows what it's gonna be like.
Eddie: I am just glad that Fantasy has been asked to stay home tonight...I would of hated seeing something bad happen to her. Let's go to the ring for the intros!!!
Announcer: First to the ring, the dark one. The current Heavyweight champion of the world, Dark Twilight...
((Dark Twilight enters the ring with the HWC World title over his shoulder.))
Announcer: Now, here is his opponent. Kash Flagg
(( Spiders plays as Kash seems to be wandering to the ring, walking from left to right as he
makes his way to ringside.))
Travis: Look at this bozo. He's smiling. I really think this guy has lost it. I don't think that elevator goes all the way to the top floor.
Eddie: Let's just hope he hasn't lost his wrestling ability. He has a
huge task at hand. He's facing the current world champion.
Travis: You're right, for a change. And, they used to be allies so Dark
Twilight must know his weaknesses.
Eddie: Here's the bell. DT goes straight for Kash. DT is pummeling Kash and has him against the ropes.
Travis: You aren't going to win a match like that. Look at him. He's taking a beating and is still laughing. What the hell is wrong with this guy?
Eddie: Kash is down. DT has literally beat him to the ground and Kash
hasn't thrown the first punch. DT is shrugging his shoulders in confusion about Kash's lack of offense. It looks like DT is walking away from Kash...
Travis: Look, the outpatient from Bellevue Mental Hospital looks to be getting up. Damn, he's still laughing. This guy is nuts.
Eddie: DT doesn't know he's up. Kash running towards DT and from behind, gives DT a double ax handle. DT falls to the mat.
Travis: Look, he's snapped.
Eddie: Kash has gone crazy. He's all over DT. Kash picks DT up...whips him into the ropes....lariat.
Travis: That loosened up a couple fillings.
Eddie: Kash picks up DT....scoop slam. Kash runs...off the ropes...big leg drop on DT.
Travis: With a leg drop like that, I would think he would be ripping his shirt off and flexing his arms for the camera. Remember kids, take your vitamins and say your prayers...
Eddie: Best, what are you talking about? You've been watching too many old Wrestlemania tapes or something. Kash picks up DT again...whips him into the ropes...tries for another clothesline. DT ducks the clothesline. Both men off the ropes....DT with a swinging neckbreaker. He quickly follows with an elbow drop.
Travis: Good combo. You can tell why he's the champ.
Eddie: You're right, Best. He's really showing he wants to keep this
belt. DT climbs to the top of the ropes. He's waiting for Kash to get up. Kash is slow to get up...missile drop kick off the top ropes from DT!
Travis: OUCH! I think Kash is gonna cough up a lung from that move.
Eddie: DT picks up Kash. DDT! DT is down for the cover....1....2....and
Kash kicks out.
Travis: Oh yeah, this guy has really lost his marbles. I would have just
taken the three count if I knew I was going to get up to this beating...
Eddie: Kash slowly gets to his feet. DT whips Kash into the
ropes....OOOH! another BIG lariat by Kash. DT is down.
Travis: DT gives up a little in size to Kash. That big lariat proved that size has a lot of importance in this sport. DT almost got decapitated by
that clothesline.
Eddie: Kash picks up DT. Knee to the gut...OHHHH!!! Kash gives DT a
short power bomb....Kash is going up....he's at the top of the ropes....BIG SPLASH!!! DT MOVED....DT MOVED!!!!!!
Travis: Damn! That looked like a belly flop on a cement sidewalk. You
remember that lung Kash coughed up after the missile drop kick? Well, I
think that belly flop took care of the other...
Eddie: DT is now going up. He's on the top turnbuckle. Kash slowly gets to his feet. DT from the top....REVERSE! KASH CAUGHT HIM IN MID-AIR FOR A POWER SLAM!!!! WOW! Kash goes for the cover.....1......2.......DT got his left foot up on the ropes. Almost a pinfall...
Travis: These two guys better save some for the world title finals match. They're both beating the hell out of each other. They'll be wheeling themselves to the finals match in wheelchairs if they keep this up.
Eddie: This is the calibre of match you get when you get down to the last five people in the tourney. These guys are the cream of the crop.
Travis: Cream of the crop? ..."It's the Eye of the Tiger, you're the cream of the crop..."
Eddie: Please! You need to watch less TV. OK, back to the action. Both men are slow to get up after DT just broke the pin. They both rise to their feet. DT swings at Kash. Kash ducks...pushes DT into the ropes...DT bounces back.....OHHHH! KOLD HARD KASH!!!! KOLD HARD KASH!!!!! DT'S DOWN! Kash for the cover.....1......2......3!!!!! KASH FLAGG WINS AND ADVANCES TO THE FINALS!!!
Travis: Holy smokes!! He pulled that move out of his ass or something. I
never saw that coming. Look at him. He's laughing again! He's got that
silly grin. What the hell is this guys deal?!
Eddie: I don't know but whatever it is, it's working. Wait...Here come Hellraizer down to the ring!!!! OH MY GOD he has a sledgehammer in his hand!! Kash grabs the sledgehammer....OH GOD!!!! He is smashing DT's leg!!! This is insane!!! His leg is shattered!!!
Travis: Insane?? Look at who you are talking bout....Cpt. Insano and Lt. Loco here.
Eddie: This is horrible!! Maybe retribution will happen as Kash will face the winner of the other semi-final match which will be a triple threat match. He will face either Tru Soulja, Kidd Rock or, his long standing nemesis, Justice.
Travis: Yeah, Justice has a new alliance now. He looks like another that has fallen off the rocker. This next match should be a good one.
Eddie: Well folks, stay tuned. We have the triple threat match coming up after these announcements.
(( The camera cuts to a commercial for the new Justice t-shirt on the front it says Total Purification and on the back it says Judgement Day is at Hand!!! Only 14.99 plus shipping and handling from HWC enterprises.
The camera cuts back to Eddie and Travis at the announcer's booth))
Eddie: We are back folks and what a card we have had so far!!! The return of the Anglemaster Steve Saxon.....The apparent breakup of the tag champs the DOD....just so much has happend!!
Travis: Don't forget about Bob Saget taking out that piece of trash Deluxe with a speak and spell (laughs hard)
Eddie: (laughing also) That was pretty funny...but back to being serious here...we got the second semi final for the World Title and this one will be a doozy!!! Let's not waste any time and get to the ring!!!
(( The camera cuts to the announcer in the ring))
Announcer: This match is the semi final and the winner of this match will face Kash Flagg for the HWC World Heavyweight Title!!!! (huge applause) First.....from Los Angeles California...Tru Soldja!!!!
(( The crowd cheers as Throw Yo Soldja Rag plays and Tru Solja makes his way to the ring))
Announcer: Next up...from Detroit Michigan.....Kidd Rock!!!!
(( Bahwitdabah plays as Kidd Rock comes to the ring to a huge ovation ))
Announcer: And finally...from Raliegh North Carolina...Justice!!!
(( No music plays as Justice runs out ot the ring and instanly attacks Tru Soldja))
Eddie: And Justice is wasting no time in attacking Tru for his salad comments on the HWC website....
Travis: Salad shooter is what he needs (laughs hard)
Eddie: That's gross!!!!!! Tru is just getting hammered here by Justice and Kidd. Kidd turns towards Justice, and is met with the huge hand of Justice. He picks up Kidd and Chokeslam!!! that was vicious!!! Justice turns around and is met with Tru clothsline!!! They are killing each other out there!!!
Travis: It's True It's True!!!
Eddie: Wrong wrestler Best... Tru grabs Kidd and throws him into Justice knocking Justice out of the ring!!! Tru picks up Kidd and..michonoku driver!!!
Travis: That's my main man Tru there!!!! Show those losers how it's done!!!
Eddie: Please ignore the BIASED opinions of Mr. Best here. Tru's going for the pin...
1...
2...
...and Justice pulls Tru outside the ring..They are trading punches left and right...and Justice throws Tru into the ring steps!!!
Travis: Get up TRU!!!!!! I got 5 grand on you to win!!!!!
Eddie That gamblings gonna get you into trouble. Justice picks Tru up, but here comes Kidd flying over the ropes and onto Tru and Justice!!!! What a risk taker!!! Kidd jumps back into the ring and the crowd is going wild for him!!!
Travis: Because he's trailer trash just like all the other rednecks here.
Eddie: That's not true!!! We have wonderful fans here!!! Kidd is up on the ropes showboating...not a smart thing....wait...here comes Smackdaddy!!!! The ref is outside breaking up Tru and Justice to see Smackdaddy run into the ring and Smack just pushed Kidd rock onto the floor!!!
Travis: I guess that's why you should be nice to the people who serve ya food...otherewise you get your ass kicked
Eddie: Smackdaddy is outside pummeling Kidd Rock as Justice and Tru make it back into the ring.. they are both cris crossing each other and...double clothsline!!! Both men are down!!
Travis: (screaming) GET UP!!!!! GET UP TRU DAMN IT!!!
Eddie: Travis settle down!! Tru turns over and lays a hand on Justice...
1...
2...
....and Justice gets his shoulder up!!!
Travis: That was a THREE!!!! Tru should of won!!!! Are you F$%king blind??
Eddie: Watch the language Best. Kidd seems to be getting the better of Smackdaddy out here by the announcers table...and it looks like Tru is the first one up...Tru runs into the ropes...Kidd grabbed Tru's leg!!! Tru is stumbling towards Justice...Justice has him.....JUDGEMENT DAY!!!! He hit the Judgement Day on Tru...and he's going for the pin...
Travis: Smackdaddy is stopping Kidd from getting in the ring...NOOO!!!!
Eddie: He has him pinned...
1...
2...
...3!!!!! Justice wins!!!! It will be Jutice versus Kash Flagg in the finals!!!!
Travis: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!! My money....gone...
Eddie: Are you ok Travis??
Travis: NO I AM NOT!!!!!
(( Travis gets up and runs off sobbing about his lost money ))
Eddie: Get back here!!! Trav....wait fans!!!! It looks like Tru has come out and Smackdaddy and Tru are tearing Kidd apart!!! Tru motions Smackdaddy to do something...wait...he's setting up a table out here on the floor!!!!! Tru isn't going for it is he????Smackdaddy has the table set up and he throws Kidd back into the ring.....Tru picks up Kidd and...NOO!! A Soldja Bomb to the outside!!!!! Tru just dropped Kidd through the table outside...and look at Smackdaddy...he is poring nachos and cheese all over Kidd...This is pay back I guess.
(( Chris Murphy comes the announcers table and sits with Eddie))
Eddie: Joining me now is Chris Murphy. Chris good to see you here.
Chris: Pleasure to be joining you here at ringside Eddie.
Eddie: Justice has been watching all this from the ramp....He seems to be enjoying the...There's Flagg!!!! Flagg just blindsided Justice!!!
Chris: I guess the finals is going to be a hardcore match.
Eddie: Seems like it as the bell rings, but these men don't care...they just want to rip each other limb from limb!!! Flagg has a fire extingisher and hits Justice straight in the face with it!!!
Chris: Talk about facial reconstruction!!!
Eddie: Justice has already been in two matches....I don't know how much punishment he can take here. Kash has a broomstick and..right into Justice's stomach!!! And now he just broke the broomstick over Justice's back!!!
Chris: Justice is out.....Kash can pin him now, but it doesn't seem like he wants to...
Eddie: He's got a table set up on the rampway....he lays Jutice on the table...OH MY GOD!!!! He's starting to climb the HWCtron!!!!
Chris: This is what he meant when he said he wanted to fly!!! This is suicidal!!!
Eddie: Without a doubt....Flagg is getting closer to the top.... Flagg is on top of the HWCtron!!!!
Chris: Wait....he's losing his footing...oh dear god no....
(( Kash Flagg falls off the HWCtron onto the ground below.))
Eddie: OH MY GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!! KASH JUST FELL 30 FEET!!!! HE COULD BE DEAD!!!!!!!!!!
Chris: Justice crawls off the table and covers Kash...
1...
2...
...3!!! Justice is the new champion!!!!!!!
Eddie: Forget that...is Kash ok???
Chris: Look at the top of the HWCtron!!!!
(( Camera cuts to the top of the HWCtron...where Cypress Lavey stands))
Eddie: LAVEY PUSHED HIM!!! THAT SICK EVIL SON OF A BITCH JUST TRIED TO KILL KASH FLAGG!!!!!
Chris: Calm down eddie...he has a mic...
Lavey: Kash....I TOLD you I would make you suffer.....well i just ended your suffering for GOOD!!! People I told you...the Unholy Alliance will rule the HWC.....and NO ONE will stand in our way!!!!
(( Lavey lets out an evil laugh and dissapears....))
Chris: The ambulancea are taking Kash to the hospital...hopefully we will have an update on his condition soon....I hate to leave on this horrible note but we have ran out of time.....for the shaken up Eddie Danniels and myself....be safe and God bless!!
(( The camera fades on a shot of an ambulance quickly leaving the arena heading for the hospital....))
