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| A time comes in your life when you |
| finally get it . . . |
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| When in the midst of all your fears and insanity |
| you stop dead in your tracks and somewhere, |
| the voice inside your head cries out - ENOUGH! |
| Enough fighting and crying, or struggling to hold on. |
| And, like a child quieting down after a blind tantrum, |
| your sobs begin to subside, |
| you shudder once or twice, |
| you blink back your tears and through a mantle |
| of wet lashes, you begin to look at the world |
| through new eyes. |
|
| This is your AWAKENING . . . |
|
| You realize that it's time to stop hoping |
| and waiting for something to change, |
| or for happiness, safety and security |
| to come galloping over the next horizon. |
| You come to terms with the fact that the two of you |
| are not Prince Charming and Cinderella |
| and that in the real world, |
| there aren't always fairy tale endings |
| (or beginnings for that matter) |
| and that any guarantee of "happily ever after" |
| must begin with you and in the process, |
| a sense of serenity is born of acceptance. |
|
| You awaken to the fact that you are not perfect |
| and that not everyone will always love, |
| appreciate or approve of who or what you are, |
| and that's OK. (They are entitled to their own views |
| and opinions.) And you learn the importance of loving |
| and championing yourself and in the process, |
| a sense of new found confidence is born of self-approval. |
|
| You stop complaining and blaming other people |
| for the things they did to you (or didn't do for you) |
| and you learn that the only thing |
| you can really count on is the unexpected. |
| You learn that people don't always say what they mean |
| or mean what they say and that not everyone will always |
| be there for you and that it's not always about you. |
| So, you learn to stand on your own |
| and to take care of yourself and in the process, |
| a sense of safety & security is born of self-reliance. |
|
| You stop judging and pointing fingers |
| and you begin to accept people as they are |
| and to overlook their shortcomings and human |
| frailties and in the process, |
| a sense of peace & contentment |
| is born of forgiveness. |
|
| You realize that much of the way you view yourself |
| and the world around you, |
| is a result of all the messages |
| and opinions that have been ingrained |
| into your psyche. You begin to sift through |
| all the junk you've been fed about how you should |
| behave, how you should look and how much you |
| should weigh, what you should wear |
| and where you should shop and what you should drive, |
| how and where you should live and what you should |
| do for a living, who you should marry and what |
| you should expect of a marriage, |
| the importance of having and raising children |
| or what you owe your parents. You learn to open up |
| to new worlds and different points of view. |
| You begin reassessing and redefining who you are |
| and what you really stand for. |
|
| You learn the difference between wanting |
| and needing and you begin to discard the |
| doctrines and values you've outgrown, |
| or should never have bought into to begin with |
| and in the process, you learn to go with your instincts. |
|
| You learn that it is truly in giving that we receive |
| and that there is power and glory in creating |
| and contributing and you stop maneuvering through |
| life merely as a "consumer" looking for your next fix. |
|
| You learn that principles such as honesty |
| and integrity are not the outdated ideals of a bygone era, |
| but the mortar that holds together |
| the foundation upon which you must build a life. |
|
| You learn that you don't know everything; |
| it's not your job to save the world |
| and that you can't teach a pig to sing. |
| You learn to distinguish between guilt |
| and responsibility and the importance of |
| setting boundaries and learning to say NO. |
| You learn that the only cross to bear is the one |
| you choose to carry and that martyrs |
| get burned at the stake. |
|
| Then you learn about love. Romantic love |
| and familial love. How to love, how much |
| to give in love, when to stop giving |
| and when to walk away. You learn not to project |
| your needs or your feelings |
| onto a relationship. You learn |
| that you will not be more beautiful, |
| more intelligent, more lovable or important |
| because of the partner on your arm or the child |
| that bears your name. |
|
| You learn to look at relationships as they really are |
| and not as you would have them be. You stop trying |
| to control people, situations and outcomes. |
| You learn that just as people grow and change, |
| so it is with love; and you learn that you don't |
| have the right to demand love on your terms, |
| just to make you happy. You learn that alone |
| does not mean lonely. |
|
| You also stop working so hard at putting your |
| feelings aside, smoothing things over and |
| ignoring your needs. You learn that feelings of |
| entitlement are perfectly OK and that it is your right, |
| to want things and to ask for the things that |
| you want and that sometimes . . . |
| it is necessary to make demands. |
|
| You come to the realization that you deserve |
| to be treated with love, kindness, sensitivity |
| and respect and you won't settle for less. |
| You allow only the hands of a lover who cherishes you, |
| to glorify you with their touch and in the process, |
| you internalize the meaning of self-respect. |
|
| And you learn that your body really is your temple. |
| And you begin to care for it and treat it with respect. |
| You begin eating a balanced diet, drinking more |
| water and taking more time to exercise. You learn that |
| fatigue diminishes the spirit and can create doubt and fear. |
| So you take more time to rest. Just as food fuels the body, |
| laughter fuels our soul; so you take more time |
| to laugh and to play. |
|
| You learn that for the most part in life, you get |
| what you believe you deserve and that much of life |
| truly is a self-fulfilling prophecy. You learn that |
| anything worth achieving is worth working for and |
| that wishing for something to happen, is different |
| from working toward making it happen. |
|
| More importantly, you learn that in order to achieve |
| success you need direction, discipline and perseverance. |
| You also learn that no one can do it all alone |
| and that it's OK to risk asking for help. |
|
| You learn that the only thing you must truly fear |
| is the great robber baron of all time: FEAR itself. |
| You learn to step right into and through your fears, |
| because you know that whatever happens you can handle |
| it and to give in to fear, is to give away the right |
| to live life on your terms. |
|
| You learn to fight for your life and not to squander it |
| living under a cloud of impending doom. You learn |
| that life isn't always fair, you don't always get |
| what you think you deserve and that sometimes bad |
| things happen to unsuspecting, good people. On these |
| occasions, you learn not to personalize things. You |
| learn that God isn't punishing you or failing to |
| answer your prayers - it's just life happening. |
|
| You learn to deal with evil in its most primal state: |
| the 'ego'. You learn that negative feelings such as anger, |
| envy and resentment must be understood and redirected |
| or they will suffocate the life out of you |
| and poison the universe that surrounds you. |
| You learn to admit when you are wrong and to build |
| bridges instead of walls. |
|
| You learn to be thankful and to take comfort |
| in many of the simple things we take for granted, |
| things that millions of people upon the earth can |
| only dream about: a full refrigerator, clean running water, |
| a soft warm bed, a long hot shower. |
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| Slowly, you begin to take responsibility for yourself, |
| by yourself and you make yourself a promise to never |
| betray yourself and to never ever settle for less than |
| your heart's desire. You hang a wind chime outside your |
| window so you can listen to the wind, and you make it |
| a point to keep smiling, to keep trusting and to stay |
| open to every wonderful possibility. |
|
| Finally, with courage in your heart and with God |
| by your side you take a stand, you take a deep breath |
| and you begin to design the life you want to live |
| as best as you can. |
|
| ~author unknown~ |
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