Disclaimer: All previous apologizes apply to Matsushita-sensei, and new ones to Minekura Kazuya-sensei. Don't own any of it except the writing.

Tatsumi: Not again....

Quit complaining.

Gojyo: Wait a minute. You're not possibly proposing that...

Sanzo: Temee o korosu!

Now now, Sanzo...no shooting the author with your exorcism gun. And just you try hitting me with the harisen. I'll make you regret it.

Sanzo: Grrrr.

Watari: Wow. I never knew my potions actually worked that well!

They don't...that's one of the benefits of fiction.

Tatsumi: -_-'

Watari: Ouch. I'm sorry I said anything. ;_;

Get ready, Genso Maden Saiyuki! Huh....kind of weird to think of Seki Toshihiko being both Watari and Sanzo.... ^.^ I don't know where this one came from. Other than the idea of Gojyo tryig to get Sanzo laid...

Tatsumi buried his face in his hands. "Again? Watari-san, didn't we go through this before?"

Watari tried to look sheepish, but was too proud of himself. "C'mon, Tatsumi, what harm can it do?"

The question boggled the kagetsukai's mind. "What harm...you..." He sighed. "All right. We'll just keep an eye on them. I thought I told you not to use that one after you tried it with those Valentine's day chocolates."

Watari beamed. "But it works so well! Besides, I spilled the one guy's drink. I had to make sure he and his friend were compensated."

Tatsumi blanched. If that was what Watari considered comepensation...

Gojyo slowly opened his eyes, staring at the ceiling. There was a conspicuous absence of a female form at his side, but he was used to that. Sometimes they'd leave in the middle of the night, and he'd tell himself he didn't care. It was usually true.

"Shit," he said out loud, covering his eyes with his arm. He rolled over in an attempt to get out of bed, but found his legs tangled in something and fell ignominiously on the floor. "Stupid blanket."

It took him a moment to realize that what was restricting his lower limb movement was not, in fact, a blanket. It was, rather, a kimono.

Huh...that's weird. I don't remember putting on a kimono last night. Of course, I don't remember much of anything...I must've gotten totally wasted. There was that one guy...some blonde...something about him seemed really familiar...

Gojyo shook his head and staggered to his feet. His head began to pound in time to his heartbeat. He cautiously made his way to the sink in the corner of the room, scooping up a double handful of water and splashing it on his face. Also kind of weird...his forehead was itching. And the back of his neck seemed unusually chilly. He rubbed the water from his eyes and lifted his head, glancing into the mirror above the sink.

Next door, Hakkai sat up abruptly as a scream tore through the inn's quiet. He was in the hallway a moment later, a small ball of chi cupped in one hand, prepared for anything. The door across from him banged open and Sanzo stumbled out into the hallway, his face abnormally pale.

"Sanzo! What's the matter?" Hakkai asked.

Sanzo just stared at him.

A split second later there was another scream, this time from Gojyo's room. Then there was a woman's scream. Then Gojyo screaming some more. Then a half-naked and very shocked woman ran out into the hall and disappeared down the stairs. Gojyo came staggering into the hallway, his crimson eyes wide, naked as the day he was born.

For a moment, Sanzo and Gojyo stared at each other, each ignoring Hakkai, who was all at once a little nervous and kind of curious what was going on. Then the monk and the half-breed both said, "What the hell is going on here?"

"Maa, maa!" said Hakkai peacably, stepping in between them. "What seems to be the problem?"

Sanzo pointed at Gojyo. "He fucken stole my body, that's what the problem is!" he said. "Goddammit! I'm stuck in this stupid droopy-eyed baldy monk's body!"

"Urusai!" said Gojyo. "Give me back my body! I didn't want to wake up in your stupid manwhore body with some naked chick!"

"Ano....do you mean to tell me that you're really Sanzo...and you're really Gojyo?" inquired Hakkai. "This is most peculiar...."

Gojyo-in-Sanzo pushed blonde hair from his eyes. "This is ridiculous. How do you wear this shirt, anyway? It's cutting off the circulation to my head."

Sanzo-in-Gojyo glared at him. Hakkai diplomatically hid a smile as he tiptoed away. This was going to confuse Goku, no doubt about it. When Hakkai was gone, Sanzo folded his arms over his chest and tried to sort out in his mind what exactly had happened.

"Will you stop staring at me?" he said curtly.

Gojyo grinned. "Sorry, but I'm a handsome bastard," he said. "You better put on some pants, though. I don't want you getting me kicked out of this inn."

Sanzo grunted and went back into Gojyo's room, slipping into a pair of pants. Gojyo followed absently, rubbing at his forehead. "What exactly do you think happened?" he asked. Sanzo glared at him. It was kind of peculiar, thought Gojyo as he sat down in a chair, to see himself staring back when he looked at what should have been Sanzo.

"Obviously there was some kind of spell," Sanzo said shortly, picking up Gojyo's cigarettes and lighting one. "Something that made us switch consciousnesses. Do you remember what happened last night?"

Gojyo searched his memory. "There was that strange blonde guy who bumped into you," he said. "There was something oddly familiar about him, don't you think?"

Sanzo shook his head impatiently. "Do you think he did it? He looked harmless."

Gojyo shrugged. "He was nice enough to buy us drinks."

"And probably nice enough to feed us some kind of potion that switched our bodies," snapped Sanzo. He leaned back. "I didn't feel anything evil from him, though. He seemed like a nice guy." Sanzo's eyes twitched in irritation, and he glared at Gojyo. "How you do live with these stupid antennae on your head? I feel like I'm going to fall over!"

"Shut up! I told you they're not antennae!" Gojyo snapped. A thumping began behind his eyes. "Fuck...you're a lousy drunk who can't handle his liquor! I'm so hung over!"

Before Sanzo could retort, the door slammed open and Son Goku stood on the threshold. "Sanzoooooo!" he said, flinging himself at Gojyo-in-Sanzo. "Haraheta!"

Gojyo patted Goku on the head and smirked. "I have a remedy for that," he said, reaching into the sleeve of his (Sanzo's?) kimono and pulling out a gold credit card.

Sanzo's eyes widened. "Kisama!" he snarled. "Don't you dare!" He reached without thought into the non existent sleeve of the kimono he was not wearing for his harisen.

Gojyo's smirk widened and he produced the large paper fan with a flourish. "I always wondered how you did that," he said.

Goku looked confused.

Sanzo-in-Gojyo was seething. "You think you've won?" he demanded, spreading the fingers of his hand with a flourish. The air rushed to his palm and Gojyo's moon-blade topped staff and chain appeared.

"Shit!" Gojyo grabbed Goku and scrambled out of the room just ahead of the razor-sharp blade, the end of which punctured through to the outside of the door as Gojyo slammed it shut. "Phew! Come on, Goku, let's go get some breakfast."

Luckily for Gojyo, Hakkai was there when Sanzo emerged to restrain the monk-in-youkai from going after the other two. Perhaps it was Hakkai's good sense that managed to calm Sanzo down. Or maybe it was Sanzo petty revenge in saying, when a girl approached him, that he was only interested in men. Or maybe it was the alcohol.

When Gojyo and Goku returned, the boy was laden with packages of food. Gojyo sent Goku to his room and surveyed the people (half of them, anyway) in the inn. Luckily for him, Hakkai had bundled a moderately drunk Sanzo upstairs before they arrived. "Time to have a little fun," he said out loud, going to the bar and ordering a drink. He pulled the gold card out from his sleeve, noting that it still smoked a little bit...

"Hey there, handsome," said a female voice. He turned and surveyed the woman who draped herself against the bar next to him.

"Hello yourself," he replied. He didn't know if he would be back in his own body in the morning or not, but it would probably be worth it just to hear Sanzo when he woke up to a strange woman...and in his own body.

"So you're a monk, are you?" she said, leaning forward to show him her cleavage.

He appraised her with a smile. "Oh, I'm a very bad monk," he said with a smirk.

She leaned even closer. "Is that so?"

He stood, wrapping an arm around her shoulders. "It is," he said. "You can call me Sanzo-sama." They were halfway to the stairs when inspiration struck. "Do you have any friends around here?" he asked.

She laughed. "My, you are a naughty monk..."

It should have been a peaceful morning. Hakkai was rudely awakened by the sound of many screams coming from the room across the hall. He bolted into the hallway in time to see half a dozen girls running out of Sanzo's room. He stared after them as Sanzo staggered out into the hallway, pulling his jeans on, exorcism gun held in one hand, veins popping out all over his head.

"GET OUT HERE, YOU BASTARD!" he yelled, pounding on Gojyo's door. "WHAT THE HELL DID YOU DO IN MY BODY?"

"Maa, Sanzo--it isSanzo again, ne?" Hakkai said.

Sanzo ignored Hakkai. "Gojyo! Kisama o korosu!" he kicked down Gojyo's door.

Goku came into the hallway sleepily, rubbing his eyes. "What's going on?"

Hakkai tilted his head, hearing the sounds of Sanzo firing the exorcism gun, and Gojyo (hopefully) dodging while both of them cursed. "Sanzo and Gojyo are having a disagreement," he said.

Goku peered into Gojyo's room. "Oh good! They're back to normal!" he said.

Hakkai blinked. "You--knew?" he asked.

"Of course!" the little youkai said. "Sanzo would never have actually let me buy all that food." He sighed mournfully. "It was tasty, though."

Hakkai considered the matter. "I believe you're right, Goku," he said.

The fight spread into the hallway as Gojyo, half-dressed, rolled away from one of Sanzo's shots. Scrambling to his feet and laughing hysterically, he escaped down the stairs as the irate monk emerged.

"Gojyo! Get back here so I can kill you!" Sanzo yelled, chasing after the half-demon.

Goku and Hakkai eschanged a look. "I'll just go pay the bill," Hakkai said cheerfully.

Goku perked up. "Ne, can we have breakfast too?"

Watari beamed. "See? It wasn't so bad."

Tatsumi rubbed the back of his neck. "You know, that monk looked awfully familiar," he said.

Watari tilted his head. "Really? I didn't notice..."

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