Warning! The Following Story Is Rated PG13

Ever since he was a boy of 10, Victor Omfg has never fit in, he ate vasaline on toast, and thought picking at his ass would get girls. Then he turned to books. His new name at school became "Dumb Ass Book Nerd". Not very original,but it got the job done. Victor planned to turn all the students into cow assholes, but his machine exploded, and radiated him (kinda stupid, but hey). Anyways, with his new radioactive brain, he became Dr. Omfg, evil dude that does stuff.

"Now, I will create an army of robots to do my evil bidding", said Dr. Omfg. Working late into the night, (We're going to call him Doctor for now on) Doctor created his first robot prototype. But, sadly it turned on him and attempted to rip out his jugular vein. He attempted once more, but failed again. This one didn't go for his jugular vein, but tried to steal the peach (wink, wink).

"Well, robots havn't been working out, now it is time to clone a minion", he said. He collected DNA from all of the vile things on the earth; Lions, Tigers, and Bears (Oh, My!) and last of all.. ..Lawyers.
He succeded in cloning a new breed of pigs, which he later called 'Evil Piggies'. With a huge army evil piggies under his command, he soon took over Afghanastan, and used Osama bin Laden's turban as a toilet. He hid in the caves and developed weapons of mass destruction which usually backfired, causing mass casualties.