My mind..senses..body..all tingling.
What was happening to me, why was I feeling such things?
Seconds, minutes, hours, days, weeks had past..most of my time spent with..Andie. My legs would continue to guide me to her bar, and, when my mind was telling me to turn around, a beat deep within forced me to keep going on.
Always, I would stand across the street of her bar, hands in my pocket, debating to myself..
Should I go..?
Should I turn around..?
The answer was always the same, involving my legs taking long strides across the street, the movment blowing my coat open and exposing the bareness of my chest.
Finally, I would find myself in front of the door, my left hand reaching out and firmly grasping the knob..twisting it, awaiting the familiar click of the latch.
And, so the door would give way..my right hand pushing against it. The thought of running was always there, a constant reminder of how afriad I was. Afraid of being rejected from her..or maybe it was being accepted..
Thalassa was behind me now. Nowhere else to go. Screw them. All just stuck up rich assholes. They told me I wouldn't get noticed when I left..but they would be proven wrong.
Gently, the door was closed behind me..

Foggy gray orbs were instantly locked on Andie, starring up into the ceiling..with a tear rolling down her face every now and then.
Each salty liquid would crystalize, falling onto the wooden counter where she laid. I was not a man enough to let her know I noticed she was crying..it was none of my buisness. Standing there a moment, it seemed as if her dragon friend 'Dude' alerted Andie of my prescence.
I will admit..I was a bit hurt when she sat up slightly to glance at me, then closed her eyes and looked back to the ceiling.
Feelings weren't allowed to be shown, even when I wanted them to be.
I stood there a few moments longer, until a sound of curiousity escaped my mouth. It was then, Andie told me..about the night before.
Apparently, Seifer had been there, and Andie kicked him out. There was no need to ask for a reason..but my blood did begin to boil. Not even had I met the man, and I already wanted his blood to be sprayed across the walls, and have his lifeless corpse lie at my feet.
A few more words were exchanged..which she seemed to take the wrong way. I stood, silently, still, thinking of what to do, what to say.
It was then, Andie hopped from the counter, walking over to me..starring directly into my eyes. My heart could have melted right then in there. She only came to my chest, for I was much taller than her.
The question which was asked next was a shock..a question I always feared she would ask.
'Why do you keep comming back?'
I was stunned, speachless. I couldn't tell her the truth..I couldn't reveal my newly obtained feelings. Instead I lied. The worst lie that I ever told in my life.
'I..Don't know.'
As soon as the words slipped form my mouth, I hung my head..looking at the floor. Andie seemed to explode at my reply. She yelled for a moment, asking me questions. Her words are still burned freshly in my mind.
'How can someone not know?! I mean, what, are you trying to hide from someone in your stupid kingdom? Or are you a spy or.. or.. a person learning about the new world or are you some amniesiactic freak who is just looking for something to familiarize with? What?!'
She was shaking, I didn't know if it was out of anger..or..or something else, but I came back with a reply..one neither of us expected.
'What if I am running from the kingdom huh?! What does it matter?! What if I am a spy, or a man who forgets?! I have you to thank for all of this Andie. YOU! It is because of you that my feelings were re-opened, feeling as if someone was pooring salt into a freshly slit wound. I..I care about you Andie.'
Where those words came from..I still don't know. Wait, yes..I do know. They were from the heart. The problem was, then I couldn't recognize it...
Andie looked as if she was in disbelief..her gaze shifting to the floor..and a simple '..I' hanging in the air as she spoke.
It was then, I told her about my plans. My plans to get away..from emotions, feelings, the kingdom..everything. The only problem is I would be leaving the one of my obsession behind..
This seemed to raise a question..and she dared ask it.
'Why... why do you always leave?'
Her voice was so quiet..I don't know how I heard. She wasn't done, however..as she continued.
'Do you always run from your problems? And leave before I get to speak otherwise, like so many times you've done before...?'
Still..disbelief. I didn't know what responding would do..but I did anyways.
'Would you have said anything otherwise? Does it surprise you that I have more feelings than I let others see? Does it surprise you that I speak more fequently when I have something to say? Well? It was just easier to leave like that..so I didnt have to wait for a response and you didnt have to give one.'
I couldn't believe I was saying this..letting her know how I actually felt. That was how strong I cared for her..telling her my..feelings
More words were spoken..ending in my hand around the handle of the door..like so many other times. There was nothing else to say..nothing else to do. My hand jerked, pulling the door open slightly, revealing a crack of light.
Her voice was choked, quiet..
'Please... don't leave again... I... I don't want to be alone...'
That was one of the first moments..I felt like crying. My body had other ideas, however..as my hand was dropped from the door handle..and words were spoken that didn't feel as if they should have.
'I..I..will see you around Andie.'
Turning, I left the bar..daring not to look back..cursing myself deep down. There was an alley nearby..and I went into it.
And cried


~Giad