Actually it's Mr. Bo Bob Brown, my pappy's last name was Bob and my sis married my uncle's cousin's next door neice who was previously married to my grammy who had my great uncle who spawned me an my sis an my pappy all at once through some incestuous inveterothingamabobber and then...

...just tell us what you saw.

I saw dem Aldair guys. They was tippin my cows and mowed sumpin in my field. Sumpin bout megadeath. I think they gunna kill me an et me!

Where did they go?

Dey went into da corn fields, eatin all my crops. Dey took my daughter out der too. She gots big buzumbas cause she just bore my grand niece/ step-daughter/ half-sister. I think they gunna get her pregunt agin.

That sounds like Aaron, the drummer.

I have a cousin-grandson-plumber's wife who was a drummer. Plays the spoons too y'all.

You're sure it was ALTAiR?

Yup. Had on these jackets with diagonul zippers an golden insturmints that shot deese floatin musicul notes like in Silverhawks.

We are hot on the trail of ALTAiR. More on this later!