You Know You're Korean If...

In General

1. You are one big racist �ѱ���� (Han Gook Saram)
2. You think you're better than other Asian ethnic groups
3. Your friends think that you have a name tag in front of your undies ... 
4. Your parents compare SAT scores with other Korean parents 
5. You bring someone over of the opposite gender, they think that you're dating him/her
6. You're parents freak out when you're non-Asian friends come over and step on the carpet with their shoes on
7. Your parents think you should start dating at the age of 20
8. When you don't use the fan in the bathroom ... au toilette de DDONG!
9. You automatically associate j for z; p for f; and realize that the w is sometimes silent (as in jazz, frank, and wood)
10. You always find annoying little red kimchi peppers stuck between your teeth
11. You're in korea a lot
12. Your mother has a short-haired, curly perm
13. Your father hikes his pants up to his chin when he gets angry
14. You ask your parents help on one math problem and 2 hours later, they`re still lecturing
15. You have a 50 lb. bag of rice in your pantry
16. Everyone thinks you're CHINESE
17. Your parents enjoy comparing you to their friend's kids friends...(but when you compare them to other parents, they say, "DON`T COMPARE!")
18. Your parents say, "Don't forget your heritage"
19. You drive mostly Japanese cars
20. You've learned to keep bargaining even if the prices are rock bottom
21. You've had to eat parts of animals they don't even put in hot dogs
22. Piles of shoes tend to make it hard to open the front, back and closet doors
23. You hear (your name + ee (optional) +ah!) every time someone calls you.(ex: Jin-ee-ah! or Sae Young-ah!)
24. You have like, NO eyelashes
25. Idiotic white people try to impress you with pathetic imitation Asian languages, like the every-so-popular: ching chong woo bok chi ...
26. Your parents say leaving rice in your bowl is a sin
27. Your parents say, "You want a stereo?!? When I was your age, I didn't even have shoes!"
28. The bio lectures on marine life (seaweed, sea cucumbers, octopus) was last night's dinner
29. At least one family member wears black wire/plastic frame glasses
30. Your parents hover over your tired, caffeine-drugged body at 2AM to say, "In Korea, we studied even more."
31. Your parents expect you'll be friends with any one off the street in any given area as long as they are Korean
32. When an Asian woman comes on campus, people automatically ask, "Is that your mother? Well then, is it your sister?"
33. Your parents say, "Calculus? I took calculus in the 8th grade!"
34. Everyone thinks you're good at math
35. Your aunts and uncles bring you back adorable clothing from Korea, with fuzzy bunnies, vinyl ducks and English words that make no sense!!! In great colors like yellow, pink, magenta, orange, and the ever-so-popular lime green
36. Your parents would kill you if you marry a non-Korean


1. You like H.O.T (high five of teenagers)
2. You Freekin carry a agenda with 500000000000 sticker pics
3. You call people ���/��� (uhnni/oppa) when u want something in that annoying whiney voice .. & they`re only like, ONE hour older than you!
4. You go clubbing in black: black DKNY shirt, black skirt, black thighhighs, black platforms & lastly ... black backpacks w/ cute little Korean characters that make noise pinned 2 them You`re a gold-digger
5. When you were little, you had two acres of bangs
6. Everwhere you go, you look like you`re ready to go clubbing
7. You wear the same exact makeup as all ur friends
8. You wear the same exact clothes as all uour friends
9. You have the same exact hairstyle as all your friends
10. You say "Ya know" and "Right" a lot
11. You make a lot of hand gestures when you talk
12. You refer to all guys at least 1 hour older than u as "��� (oppah)"
13. You have this shrilly whiny voice that goes along with "���ƾƾƾƾƾƾ�~ (oppaaaahhh)"
14. You shave off your eyebrows & just pencil 2 thin lines in
15. You`re computer-illiterate
16. You wear 500 inch heels to compensate for your under 5ft height
17. No matter how skinny you are, you are still on a diet
18. When you go on a date, you NEVER eat (Sometimes you order a Diet Coke 
19. At parties, you always dance in BIG-ASS groups
20. You only go for guys with hella nice cars
21. You own at least 1 pair of the black "Regulation clubbing pants"
22. You`re always at pool halls, even though u can`t even play shit
23. Even when it`s BUTT cold, u still seem to wear very revealing clothes
24. You get that eye surgery thing, even though it makes u look like a fish
25. Your hair is almost yellow
26. When you`re with your friends who look exactly like u, u have to stare down every other Azn girl that walks by
27. You smoke to lose weight 
28. You wear those BIG fluffy balls on your hair
29. You wear dark lipstick (the browner the cooler--no matter if you end up lookin like you stuffed your face in chocolate)
30. To achieve the NATURAL look, apply layers and layers of make-up on ... if it starts to look unnatural (heaven forbid), Just apply another layer
31. You curl your eyelashes till they touch your eyelids
32. Girls must stare at each other more than they do with guys


1. You hate H.O.T (High five Of Teenagers)
2. You're an expert at street fighter 2 and on...
3. You look harsh cocky in sticker pics
4. You have "Fists of Fury" (haha)
5. Your dad gives you beers
6. You`re either a goody-goody Christain boy or a kkangpeh wannabe
7. You`re a chain-smoker always hanging out at clubs, cafes, pool halls, etc.
8. Your homeboys wear the BYC/TRY naningoos, you think you look fresh
9. You`ve had a bowl haircut at one point in your life
10. You think you`re all hard-core if you know how to break dance 
11. You always have to put up with the "20 questions" game when you call a girl & her parents answer ... but if you`re smart, you ask, "Um, hello? Is Bob there?"
12. You see some girl you think is really cute, but when your friends ask you what u think of her, you say, She`s not all that"
13. You have to go to parties in huge groups, but once you get there - you just stand there doing nothing 
14. At parties you live by the credo "DON`T DANCE, CHAIN SMOKE INSTEAD"
15. Instead of jello, you think "There`s always room for soju"
16. You were once part of a "Gang" or a "Crew" in your youth years
17. You never smile in pictures, but give that "Hey look at me, I`m the bomb" look
18. You think the more you drink & smoke, the more attracted girls will be two you
19. You're a master of "Killer Instinct" or "Mortal Kombat III"
20. You NEVER leave the mall w/out at least one set of digits
21. You must wear the choice of: Eternity, Escape, Cool Water
22. You`re racist
23. You never say "Hi" verbally back to a girl ... either lift one eyebrow, nod your chin (very cocky), or wink (the most annoying one)
24. You either think HOT`s ALL that or you think they`re Sah gah ji ups suh (�ΰ��� ���) 
25. You think you`re ALL that when you play b-ball

h1 align="center">80 Ways You Know You're Korean

1. You have a container full of Kim-Chee in your fridge right now.

2. You own a pair of BYC socks.

3. You or your parents start singing when drunk.

4. Your parents are shorter than you.

5. You call a korean older than you “Oppa/Hyung” or “Un Nee/Nuna”

6. Your parents think church is a social event.

7. You know the “San-Toki” song.

8. “No-Rae-Bang” is a common household word.

9. Your main source of income is New Years.

10. Everyone asks if you’re Chinese.

11. Your parents think anything goes with rice.

12. “Glue? Use rice, it’s better!”

13. You or your parents have eaten household pets.

14. Your parents have never kissed you.

15. Your parents have never kissed each other.

16. Your parents still think they can spank you, even when you moved out.

17. Failing a class means finding a new place to live.

18. You have naked baby pictures of you.

19. Your mom rents korean soap operas and watches them daily.

20. You read the labels of everything to see if it was made in Korea.

21. When you were little, relatives used to grab your genitals. Some still try.

22. Sleeping on the floor is nothing new to you.

23. You live or used to live with your “hal-mo-ni”.

24. Your parents yell your korean name REAL loud in public places.

25. No matter how hard they try, your parents will never pronounce “wood” correctly.

26. You think “Ramen” is the fifth food group.

27. You have to translate for your parents when ordering fast food.

28. Your parents are afraid of black people.

29. Your family owns a dry cleaning place, liquor store, or grocery store.

30. You have “Bori’Cha” in your fridge right now.

31. At least one member of your family wears black wire/plastic glasses.

32. You typically cheer for the Asian athletes (ie: Michelle Kwan, Chan Ho Park, Se Ri Park)

33. Your mother has a short haired, curly perm.

34. Your parents still tried to get you into places half-price saying your 12 when your really 14.

35. You ask your parents help on your math homework and 2 hours later they’re still lecturing you about how they knew it in 4th grade.

36. You have a 40 lb. Bag of rice in your pantry.

37. Everyone thinks your “Chinese” no matter what part of Asia your ancestors were from.

38. You’ve had a bowl haircut in one part in your life.

39. Your parents enjoy comparing you to their friends’ kids.

40. When you say something about them, they say, “Don’t compare”.

41. You’ve had to sit through karaoke videos with ugly asian women attempting to dance in a temple, park, etc.

42. Your parents say, “don’t forget your heritage” after they’ve moved to another country 20 years ago.

43. You’ve had to eat parts of animals they don’t even put in hotdogs.

44. Piles of shoes tend to make it hard to open the front, back, and closet doors.

45. You hear (your name + eee (optional) + yah!) every time someone calls you.

46. You have NO eyelashes.

47. Idiot people try to impress you with pathetic imitations of Asian languages.

48. Your parents say leaving rice in the bowl is a sin.

49. The bio lecture on marine life (seaweed, octopus, sea cucumbers) was last night’s dinner.

50. Your ancestors 1000 generations’ back invented the back scratcher.

51. Your parents hover over your tired, caffeine-drugged body at 12 midnight to say, “I took this when I was 13.”

52. Your parents say Calculus? I took that in eighth grade!”

53. Everyone thinks your good at math.

54. Your parents’ vocabulary is filled with “Ai-Yahs and Wahs”

55. You like 1.75 movies.

56. You like 1.50 movies even more.

57. Your aunts and uncles bring you back adorable clothing from Asia with fuzzy bunny T-shirts that doesn’t fit your gender.

58. Your parents insist you marry within your race.

59. You learned about the birds and the bees other than your parents.

60. “You want a stereo! When I was your age, I didn’t even have shoes!”

61. People see a bunch of scribble on chopsticks and ask you to translate.

62. If you don’t get a math problem, your parents take out the wooden stick.

63. At expensive restaurants, you order a delicious glass of water for your beverage.

64. You don’t understand why your parents practically try to fight over the bill.

65. Your parents simply cut off the green/black part off the bread and say “Eat it anyway, it’s good for you.”

66. Your parents have either forced you to play the piano, violin, or both.

67. You get nothing when you do good at school, but crapped on if you don’t.

68. When going to another person’s house, you always have to bring a gift. (usually a fruit that is ripe this season.)

69. Your dad still pulls his socks to his knees, you know, the ones with the blue stripes.

70. You have rocks, sticks, leaves, deer antlers, and other strange smelling substances for medicine.

71. You own a rice cooker or two.

72. You buy soy sauce by the gallon.

73. Your parents tell you about how long it took for them to get to school, how horrifying the snow trip was…..

74. Your parents buy you clothes and shoes many sizes too big so you can “grow into them”.

75. Your parents read about some super nerd who has no life and got in the paper for scoring highest in the SAT’s and says why you can’t be more like him.

76. You don't smile because your eyes will disappear.

77. You prefer to keep your shoes off to let your feet breathe.

78. When your american friends open the fridge, they step back ten feet because of the "Kim-Chee" smell.

79. When you wear a backpack, shorts, sunglasses, some fruity cap, and walk around some famous area, people think you're a tourist.

80. You know what K.P. is.

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