Sev and Luc - 2
Harry and Draco - 1
Come on, boys! Catch up!
When we last left off, the dinner party had ended and Sev and Luc had retired to bed. Intending to catch soem sleep, both men drifted off. And then Luc woke up due to Arthur Weasley banging on the door. The two had a chat that did not end in a bloody lip or a book in the eye and peace once again settled on the house.
Until Lucilla came into the bedroom, having charmed herself to look like Tom. She stupified Sev, charmed him to look like a pillow and then woke up Luc.
Lucius, being the sucker that he is for a pretty face, particularly one with long black hair and blazing green eyes, followed Tom through hell. Or through the fireplace, whichever was closer. He was then dumped off with Voldemort.
Meanwhile, Harry started writing in the diary after being warned by Draco that it might be a trap. After all, the Malfoys are rather well known for diaries.
And if that doesn't prove just how gay they are, I don't know what will. Right, moving on!
Lo and behold, up sprang Lily from the pages of the diary. Harry looked at his mother. His mother looked at her son.
And we have...tissue scene, ladies and gentlemen! Yay! Reunion!
*passes around the toaster strudels*
In other news, Lucius got his..ponytail handed to him courtesy of Voldemort and a very sharp dagger. Bloody torture scene to be inserted here. After which, Voldemort gave orders to Lucilla to bring him Harry or Draco. Lucilla agreed and left, knowing that if she couldn't get one of them, ol' stupified Sev would do just as well.
Lessee, quick run down. Zabini and Pettigrew finally show up! Yay! *gets out the AK-47* They're let into Hogwarts courtesy of Lucilla. They offered her some Avon products and a vaccum cleaner. She refused.
She let them in anyway due to Voldie's orders and in they came.
I will give a cookie, a real one, to anyone who can count all of the typos within these pages. Looking back, I'm amazed I didn't catch more of these. Moving on!
So Zabini and Pettigrew went into the dungeons. *insert another torture scene and some rape* Dammit, people! Read the posts! I shouldn't have to cover all of this! Basically, if you can handle these posts, I'm almost positive you can handle just about anything else we throw at you.
While Zabini and Pettigrew were finishing up, Voldie inserted a dementor into the cell. Silly man that he is.
And what is Lucilla doing throughout? She makes her way back to the Manor, now a bit nervous. Understandable really. One could only stomach so much Voldie in one sitting. Personally, I'm amazed she isn't retching already. So, she goes to Harry see, and she says, she says...
"Whazzup?"
Okay, so maybe not. Her and Harry go into a conversation as to what's important and what isn't. He tells her to go back to Voldemort with a deal. El Voldie (much more powerful than El Nino and more wacked out than El Chupacabra) must release Luc fully healed, and in two weeks, he (Harry) would go to Hogwarts and duel Voldie. No seconds, no nada. Just a big ol' battle royale. Lucilla tried to talk him out of it, but Harry would hear none of it.
And so Lucilla buggered back to Voldie and told him of Harry's deal thingie. Voldie didn't much appreciate it and Lucilla got a glimpse within what was left of Lucius.
Think of roadkill without the fur. There ya go!
The sight terrified her and she staggered out. Voldie told her to go back and get either Draco or Harry. What is Severus doing throughout? Imitating a pillow. All soft and comfy.
Lucky Sev.
Lucky, lucky bastard. Hope he's happy. That jerk gets to be a pillow! A bloody pillow for godssake!
I'm better now. Moving on!
As it turns out, Lucilla doesn't have to go back to the Manor. Draco had gone willingly to Hogwarts to recover some lost artifact he had dropped there.
Silly boy.
And we spiral downwards.
Lucilla quickly put Draco into a bubble of sorts, putting the boy to sleep and handing him over to Voldemort. The kid was placed into a cell with a dementor. The dark creature couldn't touch Draco or affect him while the bubble was around him.
Meanwhile Lucius was getting bored of his cell. It was stuffy and his hay fever was acting up. He managed to escape. For full details, READ THE POSTS!
And look! There's Sirius! Tackling Lucius to the ground and soon they're ripping up their clothes and getting it on and..
Wait. That didn't happen.
What did happen was that Sirius tackled Luc to the ground, brought him to Severus' house where they shagged on the bed.
Wait...
You know, I really should start taking more notes on this.
Sirius cleaned Lucius up, healing up most of his injuries. Yay! Go Sirius! The only sane one in this rpg! And that's not saying much for the others.
So, with Luc and Sirius Flooing back to the Manor, they told Lily and Harry what had happened and Harry and Sirius went off to form a rescue mission for Draco.
They Flooed to the Shrieking Shack and started off towards Hogwarts, having been told where Draco was being kept and watching out for Death Eaters.
And now getting back to Severus Snape, the Pillow. And a very fine looking pillow he makes. You know, this kinda makes fun of itself. It really doesn't need any of my help. Bottom line is, gradually the spells started wearing off and Severus was free to stop spitting out down feathers and get up and walk. Go him! Walk, Sevvie, walk!
He met up with Hermione, now filled with rage at being turned into a pillow and hearing that Lucius left the room with 'Black.' Lousy mirrors. Really, what do we pay them for?
Fortunately, Arthur Weasley soon joined them and distracted Hermione away from Snape. Snape is a very scary person when he's pissed. Glower, Sevvie, glower! And so, Snape continued on his merry way.
I think he skipped but I'm not quite sure about that.
Meanwhile, Lucius and Lily talked of Draco, of Harry, of whiskers on kittens and leftover strudel or something like that. Whatever. They might have sang something, I'm not quite sure.
Definitely need to take better notes. Or maybe you people need to start reading the posts.
Lucius soon met up with Severus, giving him back George.
Note on George- George is one of Snape's buttons. He names his buttons. Let us all now point and laugh at Snape and his weird obsessions. Right, well, one day when Lucius and Severus were very, very drunk (not recommended for the kiddies), Lucius ended up, er, eating one of Snape's buttons. Sometimes it is best not to ask of these things. His time with Voldemort made him vomit it up and he kept it safe for Severus.
Just what he needed. A half-digested, bloodied, spewed-on button. How sentimental.
May I just say that this really describes their relationship better than anything else could?
Getting back to the story, Lucius, Sev, and Lily made their way back to the Master Bedroom. Lily slipped into the diary as Sev played Nurse to Luc, including breaking some unspoken of rule when he 'healed' Lucius.
Read the posts. I will not tell you what happened save that Luc and Sev go at it to the best of their abilities. And I don't mean sex. Defenses, wards, and masks are discussed throughout and Severus finds out the consequences of crossing lines.
Needless to say, they made up just in time to hump like rabbits and break the balcony outside to send it crashing into Narcissa's watermelon patch.
While they were on it.
What really sucked was that they were both naked, no wands, and the Manor was warded up tightly.
Enter Karkaroff.
See Karkaroff run. Run, Igor, run! No! Not into the maze! Oh dear, there's Severus jumping Karkaroff and managing to claw him quite a bit! Wait, no Karkaroff made it into the bushes! He's in the shrubbery! He's safe...oh wait..there's Lucius waiting for him. Close your eyes, children.
Welcome home, Karkaroff. For your welcome home present, you get hunted like an animal, nearly ripped apart by two ravenous Death Eaters, and then tied up to a long pole and brought into the Manor like they did in the cartoon version of Peter and the Wolf.
Yes, I am being serious and no, Karkaroff is not too well respected.
Chalk up another to the wild and crazy antics of Luc and Sev.
And pity all the others.
Meanwhile, back with Draco and Voldie and co. Voldie is getting annoyed that Draco isn't responding to the dementor and orders Lucilla to take off the bubble. This she does and the dementor tries to dement with all of its being. Dement, little dementor, dement!
And absolutely nothing happened.
So the dementor reached down and gave lil Draco a nice, big, ol' wet Kiss.
Angst! Angst! Angst alert!
Hey, if I could make fun of Ginny's death, I am certainly well-within my rights to make fun of this.
Lucilla was terrified and Voldie was a bit indifferent. He hadn't meant for *that* to happen but what was done, was done.
Do be do be doo.
Draco was unceremoniously dumped outside of Hogwarts, and was then picked up by Macnair who brought him to Harry. Harry took one look and stormed off to wreak his vengeance upon He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named. Macnair tried talking him out of it and got next to nowhere. Instead, he got a-beatin'.
My money's on Harry.
But in the end, Macnair won out by tossing him a stupify spell and apparating back to the Manor. Sirius, as Padfoot, witnessed this and, transforming back to Sirius, Flooed to the Manor in order to get there ahead of them.
Severus had made the potions for hair and tooth growth, had gone to Gringotts to pick up some cash, and then to Muggle London to pick up something else. While he was gone, Lucius slept.
Yes. He slept. Finally.
He was then woken up by Severus. And proposed to. He broke Sev's heart by jamming the ring up his...
Wait. That would never happen.
But I think Lucius would enjoy it.
As would Sev for that matter.
Lucius accepted just in time for Sirius to come into the Manor and Macnair to start banging on the door. Sirius was bringing bad news. Macnair was bringing gifts.
Lucius headed out to see Sirius, whereupon he was told that his son had been Kissed by a dementor. Severus headed out to open the door, only to have Luc and Sirius beat him out of it. He caught sight of Macnair and quickly retreated to the shadows.
Note on Macnair. Macnair has some strrraaannggee tastes. Least that's what Sev told me.
Moving on! Point is, Macnair dropped the kids off and ran back to Voldie. Harry was unstupified and Draco was huggled by his daddy who now has a lovely case of denial going on.
Enter Pansy Parkinson!
Pansy had been invited by Draco to come spend a week at the Manor. He had been drunk as sin when he had told her that but that's a mere detail! Nothing that a distortion of reality couldn't fix. Only problem was that she found herself trapped in the Malfoy's fireplace which, believe you me, you do not want to be.
Lucius gave Draco to Sev, telling him to put him to bed while he goes and frees Pansy. Sev trots along like a dutiful slave boy...
Dance, slave boy, dance! I wanna see some bouncing!
And he took Harry with him. Lucius let Pansy out of the fireplace telling her that Draco was in his room.
Read the posts already!
Or not now. Bah. Meaningless YahooGroups.
Quick update before we go to Month 4.
Pansy had gone down to see Draco. A brief conversation followed there. Lucius met up with harry in which three things happened.
One: Lucius came out of denial
Two: Harry flew into a rage and had to be subdued
Three: Harry found himself landed in Lucius' bedroom with Lily
Harry, feeling useless, embittered, grief-filled, and really angry, sliced and diced his arms. Bad Luc. Leaving knives around where boys can get at them. Fortunately, he was saved by Lily before the damage got too extensive. The two talked, well, that's putting it rather mildly. They talked/screamed/cried.
Meanwhile Lucius made his way to Draco's room, tried to kill him, could not, left in a daze. Severus followed him and they made their way down to the potions lab, whereupon Luc ingested something vile with the intent of doing himself in. Silly thing to do, really, when Snape (El Potions Master) is right there.
And so, more fun was had and as soon as the world stopped spinning, Lucius and Severus barely spoke, but the posts were long and informative. I say 'were' because the feckin' posts are lost, never to be seen again, and *screams*, and I'm okay now.
Meanwhile, Voldemort has just ingested a potion to restore him to his former glory. Such fun. He and Lucilla are about to go into Diagon Ally to pick up some pretty blonde whores and...wait, wrong rpg.
Well, they're about to go to Diagon Ally to pick up gawd knows what.
Again, last meanwhile, I swear. Hermione and Arthur, sitting in the library, discussing Ginny. In walks Pansy, about to do some reasearch on restoring life unto Draco. Arthur introduces himself to the girl and Hermione, wanting to take Arthur to Ron, asks her if she could get Draco or Lucius' help in research since they're the experts in the overly stuffed Malfoy library.
And this is were Season Two begins. Otherwise known as Storyline Part the Fourth!
I'm not buying today, Mr. Borgin, but selling.
I swear. Lucius acquired the family fortune by selling either Fuller brushes or vacuum cleaners door to door. Can you *not* see this?