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The Art of Rejection -
There have been a few times
in my life when I can certainly say that I have been a master. I mean, the best.
Grade A, premium quality, top-notch. Pure as gold. I have been so good that
I impress everyone with my skills, even the ones I couldn’t impress at all.
Those were the times I
have been rejected. Or dismissed. Turned down. Rebuffed, rebuked, re.... not
picked. The times where I was an option given to a special girl, and was not
chosen. I would turn to shake the hand of the victor, but much more often than
not, there is no one to shake. Nothing was chosen over me.
That is pretty remarkable,
I would say.
In fact, I’ve honed my
skills so well, mastered my craft to a tee, that I can be rejected even before
the question or issue is even brought up. I have been dismissed in the time
it takes to make eye-contact. I can be shot down in the matter of seconds. A
trip to the mall can prove devastating sometimes.
Sometimes, when I actually
care.
When I’m open to the world,
and the world closes its doors.
When I can see the beauty
that’s kept inside, but will not be let in any closer to.
Rejection only hurts when
you think that the two of you should have been. That if we’re only given so
many people that are meant to be with us, we can’t take anyone for granted.
We’re so desperate to not
be lonely we’ll be crushed like a trampled flower a hundred times if it means
just one person stops and takes the time to look down, pick us up, and admire
who we are.
Sometimes.
Every other time, I just
want to try. If this is life: the art of meeting, the art of evaluating, the
art of rejection, then I’m well on my way to enlightenment, because I’m learning
all sorts of ways our minds can tell us things. Like about people. We can love
and hate the same person, at the same time. Doesn’t that sound crazy? Doesn’t
that sound illogical? Because it is.
But it isn’t so unusual.
No one is actually surprised at that. It’s emotionally reasonable.
Clearly, conflicting sides.
What sort of creatures,
then, are we, to have such divided issues and feelings so common in our lives?
Other animals don’t struggle as we do. There is no creature that, when hungry,
says to itself, “Should I or should I not eat this prey?”. Creatures of instinct
can only be of one state of mind. Their present one. There is no conflict where
there is no choice. To creatures of instinct, nothing is not a choice.
Maybe I should try to date
creatures of instinct.
Maybe I should.
But, in keeping with the
theme, the Art of Rejection is merely the art of unquantified, unneeded, superfluous
thought. There is no need to consider. A choice is made at first scent. We should
live by our wits again, and perhaps our instincts will return, sharpened and
acute. All thought does is leave open the possibility of letting in someone
who we do not want in. Instinct tells us yes or no. Let that be our guide to
life.
Leave the higher thought
to the animals who like to play games.
We can’t love and hate
the same person at the same time. We’re only kidding ourselves. We’re only considering
all the possibilities.
We’re merely disguising
the truth from ourselves.
Instinct tells us the what
is true, as we believe it to be.
That is the only truth
we can really trust.
Leave your brain behind,
leave it at the door.
I’ve had enough with possibilities
today.
It is time to live by truths
again.
By Don Bernal
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