Gene Hill: "Whoever said you can't buy happiness forgot about little puppies."
(Unknown): "In dog years I'm dead"
Dave Barry: "Dogs feel very strongly that they should always go with you in the car, in case the need should arise for them to bark violently at nothing right in your ear."
Penny Ward Moser: "I wonder what goes through his mind when he sees us peeing in his water bowl."
(Danish Proverb): "The dog's kennel is not the place to keep a sausage."
Groucho Marx: "Outside of a dog, a book is probably man's best friend, and inside of a dog, it's too dark to read."
Michael Friedman: "The scientific name for an animal that doesn't either run from or fight its enemies is lunch."
Aldous Huxley: "To his dog, every man is Napoleon; hence the constant popularity of dogs."
Robert Benchley: "A dog teaches a boy fidelity, perseverance, and to turn around three times before lying down."
Sue Murphy: "Did you ever walk into a room and forget why you walked in? I think that is how dogs spend their lives."
(Unknown):"Did you hear about the dyslexic agnostic insomniac who stays up all night wondering if there really is a Dog?"
(Unknown): "I think animal testing is a terrible idea; they get all nervous and give the wrong answers."
A. Strindberg: "I loathe people who keep dogs. They are cowards who haven't got the guts to bite people themselves."
Fran Lebowitz: "No animal should ever jump up on the dining-room furniture unless absolutely certain that he can hold his own in the conversation."
Anne Tyler: "Ever consider what they must think of us? I mean, here we come back from a grocery store with the most amazing haul- chicken, pork, half cow. They must think we're the greatest hunters on earth!"
Rita Rudner: "I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult."
J. Weinstein: "My dog is worried about the economy because Alpo is 99 cents a can. That's almost $7.00 in dog money."
(Unknown): "Some days you're the dog, some days you're the hydrant."
James Thruber: "If I have any beliefs about immortality, it is that certain dogs I have known will go to heaven, and very, very few persons."
Nora Ephron: "You enter into a certain amount of madness when you marry a person with pets."
Ann Landers: "Don't accept your dog's admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful."
Robert A. Heinlein: "Women and cats will do as they please and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea."
Dereke: "In order to keep a true perspective of one's importance, everyone should have a dog that will worship him and a cat that will ignore him."
Ben Williams: "There is no psychiatrist in the world like a puppy licking your face."
Edward Abbey: "When a man's best friend is his dog, that dog has a problem."
(Unknown): "Cat's Motto: No matter what you've done wrong, always try to make it look like the dog did it."
(Unknown): "Money will buy you a pretty good dog, but it won't buy the wag of his tail..."
Christopher Morley: "No one appreciates the very special genius of your conversation as the dog does."
Josh Billings: "A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than he loves himself."
Holbrook Jackson: "Man is a dog's idea of what God should be."
Andy Rooney: "The average dog is a nicer person than the average person."
(Unknown): "He is your friend, your partner, your defender, your dog. You are his life, his love, his leader. He will be yours, faithful and true, to the last beat of his heart. You owe it to him to be worthy of such devotion"
Mark Twain: "Heaven goes by favour. If it went by merit, you would stay out and your dog would go in."
Abraham Lincoln: "I care not for a man's religion whose dog and cat are not the better for it."
(Unknown): "If there are no dogs in Heaven, then when I die I want to go where they went."
Mark Twain: "If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you; that is the principal difference between a dog and a man."
Smiley Blanton: "Things that upset a terrier may pass virtually unnoticed by a Great Dane."
John Steinbeck: "I've seen a look in dogs' eyes, a quickly vanishing look of amazed contempt, and I am convinced that basically dogs think humans are nuts."
Rita Rudner: "My husband and I are either going to buy a dog or have a child. We can't decide whether to ruin our carpets or ruin our lives."
Back to Mind Scrap *D*.
