Sitting lonely
like a waterfall
will this pain ever end?

Pain running through my body
unrelentless it is
the sun stopped shinning
rain started pouring
gloomly as my mood
as i sit lonely

                                                "Dreams"

I dream of a safe place.
A place to call home.
A place wher i wont be hurt.
Where i wont be tortured by
these memories, these dreams.
I sleep at night only to wake
up in a sweat.
Nightmares...they haunt me
day and night,
following relentlessly.
Never ending.
                                                                        Written 20/1/1998

 

                                                       "Questions"
 

Should i go or should i stay?
Should i work or should i pay?
Should i scream or should i die amoungst the hay?
Should, If, Could, But, Yet..too many
things, too many terms.
It's like what to do, and where to go?
Why should i know?
I didn't plan this, not one single thing
and yet here i am.
Dwelling at one place, trying to prove
myself in another.
Must find myself somewhere in between.
Between what?
Love? Hate? Loathing?
Caring? Revenge? Avenge?
Who knows? Who cares? I do,
i care yert i know know.
I'm lost in an endless, black pit
downing amoungst my shit.

Flying through the sky
Stars whizzing by
Lights below fading
darkness inclosing

Screams closed in tight throat
Tears of blood streaming down
Nails ripping out skin
Heart breaking in decaying body

Want to be 6 feet under
But love keeps us going
No piece of mind can be found
in this misery called life

                                                                          Written 12/2/1999
  

                                       "Remember Me"
 

Remember me.
Don't forget
your promises.
My heart wont.

Remember me.
Let the past rest
the sun will shine
if you let it

Remember me
when i'm dead
head full of lead
Innocense stolen
Heart broken
Sunless days
Cloudy nights
Don't forget me.