17 reasons to be a man
1. Phone conversations last 30 seconds flat
2. A five day holiday requires one suitcase
3. Toilet queues are 80% shorter
4. Your ass is never a factor in a job interview
5. You can go to the toilet without a support group
6. When your work is criticised, you don't panic that everyone hates you
7. None of your co-workers have the power to make you cry
8. You don't have to shave below the next
9. Chocolate is just another snack
10. Car mechanics tell you the truth
11. You couldn't give a toss if someone notices your new haircut
12. You can watch tv for hours in silence with your mates without thinking "He must be mad at me"
13. Hot wax never comes near your pubic area
14. One mood, all the time
15. Same work, more pay
16. If someone turns up to a party in the same clothes as you, you might become lifelong friends
17. Your friends can be trusted never to trap you with "So, notice anything different"
Rejection lines given by men :)
1. I think of you as a sister
2. You're too young/old for me
3. I'm not attracted to you in "that" way
4. My life's too complicated at the moment
5. I've got a girlfriend
6. It's not you, it's me
Rejection lines given by women :(
1. I think of you as a brother
2. I've got a boyfriend
3. I'm not attracted to you in "that" way
4. My life's too complicated at the moment
5. It's not you, it's me
6. I'm celibate
7. Let's be friends (which roughly translates as - I want you to stay around so I can tell you in excruciating detail about all the other men I meet and have sex with)
A genuine advert found in a lonely hearts column
Man seeks Woman
a tall well-built women with good
reputation, who can cook frogs
legs, who appreciates a good fuc-
schia garden, classic music and tal-
king without getting too serious.
but please only read lines 1,2,4 and 6
One Liners
Q: What do you say to a woman with no arms and no legs?
A: Nice Tits!
Q: What's the definition of confidence
A: When you're Wife/Girlfriend catches you in bed with another woman and you slap her on the ass and say "you're next"
Q: What's got 90 balls and makes women sweat?
A: Bingo
back to politcal correctness
