Chapter 25

Cuddled in AJ’s lap as they watched Lady and the Tramp, Jesse yawned.  Howie looked over from where he had Sarah cuddled in his lap to see that her eyelids were heavy with sleep.  He glanced at his watch and realized that he’d let her stay up way past her bedtime.

“’Princess, it’s time for you to go to bed.  Give your mother and Uncle AJ a kiss goodnight and let’s go.”

“I want Uncle AJ to….”she yawned…”put me to bed.”

“Are you sure?  I’m not gonna be here when you get up in the morning.”

Tilting her head to the side, she asked curiously, “Where you goin’, Daddy?”

“Kevin and I have some business in Huntsville tomorrow.”

“Where’s THAT?”

Howie laughed, “It’s in Alabama and we’re flying out very early.”

“I’ll show you where it is on a map tomorrow, ‘Little One’,” offered AJ.

“If YOU can find it,” mumbled Sarah.

“I’ll have you know, I was pretty good at geography when I was in school,” replied AJ.

“Daddy, how long are you gonna be gone?”

“I should be back in time for dinner.”

“Shouldn’t be going at all.”

“Come on, Jess. I’ll put you to bed and your daddy can come kiss you goodnight in a few minutes,” said AJ seeing the scowl on Howie’s face.  “Go give your mom a kiss.”

Jesse scooted off AJ’s lap and went to Sarah but before she gave her mother a kiss, she placed her tiny hands on Sarah’s belly and kissed it twice.  “Good night, little ones.”

It was part of Jesse’s nightly ritual but tonight, it hit Sarah hard and tears spilled over.

Jesse moved one tiny hand to Sarah’s cheek as she looked up.  “Good night, Mommy.  I love you and don’t worry, Daddy won’t be gone THAT long.”

Tearfully, Sarah put her hand on Jesse’s, “I love you too, baby.  Sweet dreams.”

They watched as AJ scooped Jesse up in his arms and carried the sleepy little girl down the hall to her room.

“Okay, I’ve had ENOUGH of it, Sarah,” said Howie sternly.  “You have snapped at EVERYONE tonight with the exception of Jesse and I have done everything I know to make it up to you today for being out of town tomorrow. NOTHING is working. What more do you want me to do?”

“Keep your ass at home…where it belongs!” shot Sarah angrily.

“NO!!  We’ve been through this and I explained that I can’t get out of it.  You’ve NEVER had a problem with me doing this before and I KNOW you understand.  WHY are you being like this?”

Shrinking away from him, his anger set off her tears and she curled up in a ball leaning against the back of the couch.  Her whole body shook as she cried helplessly. 

“Shit!” he swore under his breath.  Moving to her, he whispered, “Sarah, come on.  Talk to me.  Tell me what has you like this.”

Her vision was blurry as she looked at him.  Sniffling, “I’m scared, Howie.  I’m scared something’s gonna happen and you’re not going to be here to be with me.”

“Oh, ‘Angel’,” soothed Howie as he brushed her cheek.  “I’m just a phone call away.  Kevin knows that if you call, I’m on the first plane out of there.”

“But what if you can’t get here, Howie?  I can’t do this alone.”

“You’re not going to have to do this alone, ‘Angel’.  Why do you think I asked AJ to take you?”

“I don’t know,” she whimpered.

“Because I know that if anything DOES happen, he’ll take good care of you, ‘Angel’,” whispered Howie as he played with her hair.  “He’ll hold your hand and he’ll keep all the bad things away.  He won’t leave your side until I get there.”

Sarah looked into Howie’s eyes.  “You always know how to chase my ‘nightmares’ away.”

Howie smiled.  “That’s because I love you, Sarah.  You, Jesse, these little bundles….are my life and I will do whatever it takes to protect all of you.  How about I get you a warm glass of milk and then we go to bed?”

“So you can hold me?” she pleaded pitifully.

“Of course.  Wait here while I get your milk and then I’ll go kiss Jesse goodnight.”

Giving her a kiss on the forehead, Howie pulled a blanket around her before going to the kitchen where he met AJ. 

As Howie got the glass of milk, AJ asked, “Is she going to be okay?”

“I didn’t realize just how scared she is, AJ.  She’s terrified something’s going to happen tomorrow and that I’m not going to be able to get back to her in time.”

“Is she okay with me going with her?”

“Yeah, she is.  I told her that I got you because you would take good care of her.  Look in that cabinet over the sink and hand me the medicine bottle.”

AJ did as he asked and looked at what it was before handing it to Howie.  “Is that smart?”

“Yeah.  I’ve been doing this for the last two weeks on Dr. Johnson’s suggestion.  It’s the only way she’ll get any sleep.  I put it in her milk and in a matter of half an hour, she’s asleep.”

“But not to tell her?”

“I have to do it, AJ.  She’d NEVER take them on her on and she needs her rest,” Howie defended himself.

AJ shook his head.  “I guess you know what’s best for her.  I’m gonna go crash in your guest room.  What time are you leaving?”

“Around three.  I’m gonna get her to bed and set my alarm for two so I can get to the airport in time.  Do me a favor…sleep on the couch so if she wakes up after I’ve gone, you can hear her.”

“Okay,” smiled AJ.  “Does this mean I get to snuggle with her if she wakes up?”

Shaking his head, “YES!!  You can snuggle with her IF she wakes up.”

Not long after Sarah had finished her milk, she began to get drowsy and Howie helped her to their room after saying goodnight to AJ and Jesse.  He helped her into her nightshirt, tucked her into bed, and then undressed.  Sliding into the bed, he put his arm over her and she moved closer to him.  Lovingly, he caressed her stomach and listened for the signs that she was asleep.  It didn’t take long and he relaxed to get some sleep as well. 

Before dropping off, Howie said softly, “God, please just get us through the next four weeks.”

Chapter 26                    Index