"What?" Kevin blinked, not quite sure he'd heard correctly.
Sarah blushed, trying to turn away.
He held her face in his hands. "How long?"
"I ... I don't know. The dreams started a couple of months ago. I guess right around then."
"Both of us?" AJ asked, "or just-"
"No, both of you." Sarah pulled away, rising once again to pace the balcony. "The first time it happened I was so afraid you'd know, that you could see it on my face. I stayed away for the longest time, but then Howie... oh, god, Howie." She took a deep breath and continued. "He began to get suspicious, asking why I refused to go to group gatherings and stuff. I couldn't tell him. God, what was I supposed to say? *Gee, Howie, I've been having these amazing sexual dreams about two of your best friends, so I think I'd better stay home.*?"
"Go on." Kevin kept his distance, knowing she needed to tell them this, to free herself.
"I would see you, both of you, and I'd flash back to the dreams." Sarah closed her eyes against the memories. "I could feel your hands on my body, your mouth against mine ... I remember waking up feeling like I'd had the best sex of my life, but then I'd look over and see Howie asleep beside me. And I'd know that he'd never even played a part." She shuddered.
"Sarah-"
"I felt so guilty; so dirty, Kevin, like I'd been cheating on him and he doesn't deserve that. He's so good to me."
"Yeah. So good that he set you up with those two *best friends*? Give me a fucking break." AJ paced angrily, his anger at Howie growing by the second.
"Alex, stop it. Please," she implored.
Damn, she'd called him *Alex*. He knew when to back off.
"I knew he'd find out one day, I just didn't know how or when."
"What happened?" Kevin asked.
"It was amazing. You... we..." Sarah blushed furiously. "God, I can't do this." She covered her face with her hand.
AJ took her other hand. "How did he find out, Sarah?"
"Last night ... last night I had the dream again. But this time, it was more ..." she took a deep breath, "more detailed. I remember calling out your name, Kevin."
"God."
"I was really into it, I guess, and Howie began to make love to me. I think he thought I was awake by then-"
"But you weren't." AJ had a bad feeling about this.
Sarah continued, her voice small. "No, I wasn't. It felt so good, so right. And then ... I ..." she blushed again. "I had ..."
"You came ..."
"Yes," she groaned, looking at AJ. "But I called out *your* name."
AJ was speechless.
"What about-"
She interrupted Kevin's obvious question. "What about Howie? I honestly don't know. I didn't know any of this until tonight, just after you left. He did it out of love, you know. I think he thought he was helping fulfill a fantasy of mine. God, did he ever."
"And this is a bad thing why--?" AJ asked, grinning.
"Because it only made it worse. I want you more than I ever did when you just a part of my dreams. Now I've felt the reality and tonight wasn't enough. I need you. I need you both, and God help me, I'm not the least bit sorry."
"What are you saying, Sarah?"
"Kevin-" She was standing before him, her palms flat against his chest.
"I need to hear it," he said raggedly. "What do you want?"
"Make love with me."