Part 344

The house was shrouded in darkness as Becca crept silently down the stairs, wearing only her plain cotton gown. What a twist. For once, Garrett was sound asleep and here she was, wide awake. Nick was passed out, had been for hours, the covers everywhere but on his body, while Becca watched the minutes roll slowly by. The day had been an adventure from the moment they'd stepped onto the plane the previous night and had just seemed to escalate from there. Grabbing a clean glass from the dishwasher, she filled it with milk, hoping it would calm her down and help her get back to sleep.

The moonlight shining through the patio doors was more than enough to light her way, and she stood at the glass looking out over the desert as small, unidentified nocturnal animals scurried about. Her thoughts turned back to Nick, as they had throughout the day. She'd seen a side of him that few people ever got the chance to see: his vulnerability. On the surface he was the prankster of the group, the baby, the 'cute' one, but it was a cover for so many other feelings that it made her mind reel. Listening to him as he poured out his feelings about Danny's death, Garrett's birth and the million and one other things he'd been holding in had made her ache. She wanted to hold him in her arms forever and shield him from the kind of pain that he'd felt today, but she didn't know how.

How do you save a loved one from reality? How do you take back the injustices of the world? How do you ease their guilt and make them see that it isn't wrong to be blessed while others are less fortunate? Becca wiped a tear from her cheek and sat down at the ebony baby grand piano that decorated the formal living room. How sad that such a beautiful instrument was just another piece of furniture to the owners of the house. At least while Jane and Bob were renting it, it would be used.

Her index finger fell onto the keys and she began to pick at random notes, which quickly became a melody. In the dead of night the sound was much too loud, and so she quickly pressed her bare foot to the 'soft' pedal, the dampers pressing against the strings and muting the sound. Her fingers found the tune and without hesitation, her left hand added the harmony. It was a song that had played endlessly since September 11, and had become an anthem of sorts for the tireless rescue efforts that were being waged at what the media had begun to call 'Ground Zero'. She shuddered at the thought, but began to hum, and then finally, her voice found the words.

She sang softly, the tears spilling over as she thought about Nick, about Danny, and about all the others who would never know the fate of their loved one.

Warm arms wrapped themselves around her as she played, and Nick rested his head against hers. The music faded away, and Becca reached up to hold his arms and pull him closer. She closed her eyes and leaned into his embrace as he gently kissed her hair.

"That was beautiful, Bec," he whispered.

"I didn't mean to wake you."

"I missed you. I reached for you and you weren't there."

Becca heard the residual panic in his voice and instantly regretted leaving. "I'm sorry, Nick. God, I'm so sor--"

"Shh, baby, it's okay." He held her tighter as he recalled how lost she had been in the song. She hadn't even seen him watching her, listening to her sing. "You need to get back to this, Bec."

"Back? To what?"

"Your music, baby. I haven't heard you sing in so long. You miss it, don't you?"

Becca sighed. "I have a different life now, Nick. I have a family, a baby who needs me, a husband-"

"Who wants to see his wife happy."

"I AM happy!" she insisted.

"I know, baby, but your music is a part of you. It always will be. Sweetheart, I've watched you work. I've seen the way you light up when it all falls together and I KNOW that feeling. Baby, I feel it every night of my life that I'm onstage, and if I thought I'd never feel it again, a part of me would die. I know that's you, too. I don't ever want you to feel that way."

"Nick, maybe when Garrett's older…"

Nick wouldn't take 'no' for an answer. "Becca, maybe when we get back to Orlando you'll see about getting back to work part time, I dunno, just a few hours a week. Who knows, maybe you can get some session work and put that voice of yours to use. That way you could still have time with GT. And me," he grinned.

"You really think I could?" she asked brightly.

"Becca, there are going to be lots of times when you can't always travel with us. You can't just sit home with GT and mope. You need something else to do, baby."

"There's the foundation, Nick. I really need to get to work on that, too." Her voice had taken on a new excitement and Nick smiled as he imagined the gears turning in her mind.

"So when you talk to Heidi tomorrow, toss around some ideas, Bec. It'll be good for you. I'll be Mr. Mom and bond with GT while you plot and scheme. And you have a video to produce, too. Aaron's counting on your help."

Becca turned around to face him. "I love you, Nick."

"Baby, I love you, too. You mean everything to me, Bec, and I just want to see you happy."

"I am, Nick, I truly am." She lifted her face for his kiss and melted into his arms.

He kissed her slowly and thoroughly, proving over and over again how much he cared.

They both sighed as the kiss ended, and Nick pulled her to her feet. "Come back to bed, Bec, I need to hold you."

"I'd like that," she smiled, stifling a sudden yawn. As they climbed the stairs together, she decided that milk, music and Nick were just what she'd needed.

Part 345        Index(4)