Every B-Grade Action
Movie...EVER!!!
I wrote this last year in English class. We were supposed to write a story beggining with, "And then" and I prolonged it to about 5 days worth of journal entries, hense the random splits. Let's just say if there's any James Bond movie you haven't seen yet, this is what happens.
Begin, Agent Hero Man
And then... the super ninja spies broke throught the roof ceiling window to foil our overly muscular Hero from pressing the well guarded yet convieniantly placed button that could ruin the entire plan formulated by the random bad-guy with a handicap namesake. ARGH! But then...
...the girl who had a one-night stand withour Hero and has a name like a two dollar stripper showed she is actually a spy from and unknown agency in a very small country that exists soley for the purpose of this movie and saved the day by spewing a horrible pun and using the new and improved gadget that miraculously does exactly what needs to be done. It worked, untill...
...the number one henchman of the Bad-guy, who has the one defining feature that makes him better than every other nameless drone, used his defining feature to stop the girl and become tangled in an epic battle with our Hero untill the one weakness (blatantly obvious to everyone except our Hero) was discovered that made our Hero look really cool and stop the henchman dead in his tracks. However...
...our Hero was captured in a surprise move by the Bad-guy and then placed into an overly elaborate device used specifically for the delayed execution of our Hero in particular. The Bad-guy then took his handicap namesake and divulged his entire plot and exactly how to stop it, while our hero figured out how to escape. He then waited for the Bad-guys weak ego to lure him away, then escaped and...
...pushed the aforementioned button that only those who have seen/read this entirely at least once before remember, and then engaged in a 5 minute vacation montage where he is constantly thanked by diplomats of the pathetic countries he saved, accompanied by the girl. w00t.
The End
