Ten eleven a.m.
You walk with acknowledged expectations flowing through your mind
Your feet take you only so far
Until your mind takes over
You reach your room of learning unexpectedly
You’ve been thinking too much
And you’ve completely lost track of your insights
You sit
Waiting
Waiting?
Waiting for something that will probably physically arrive
But will never attach itself emotionally
You’re aware of this piercing fact, yet, you continue believing
Why?
You don’t know…
Your mind is so clouded with worry and hope it’s hard to tell
Both emotions seem synonymous in this situation
The second hand ticks by on the distant clock
While you…wait
Suddenly
It arrives
Out of the corner of your eye you catch a glimpse
You turn your head slowly and are assured that it is what you expected
This feels good
This builds you
This hurts…
This destroys
Your iris explodes creating a chain reaction which, in turn, bursts your cornea
This sends a needle through your blood stream until it reaches your heart
This hurts…
The needle segways to your stomach and twists it in a thousand binds
The needle morphs to a knife and slices a cavity in your chest
Allowing the black poison to surge into your chest
This hurts…
This hurts…
Why, though?
Why does it hurt?
Why does this continue?
When will this leave?
When will I feel ‘right’ again?
When?!
Your mind demonstrates a vulgar display of power
You anger
You tire
You give up
Never will this leave
Never
This hurts…
- Justin Bellefontaine