Blowtorch Noogie Day

Ah, Blowtorch Noogie Day. The ultimate childhood retribution has been brought back into main-stream society, with a special JELLO twist...
You see, this is the day upon which you choose your victim, and give him the harshest noogie imaginable, without causing any actual harm. No quarters, no brass knuckles, no corndogs, no ice cream, and certainly, no blowtorches. Why do we call it Blowtorch Noogie Day if you aren't allowed to employ a blowtorch? It's quite simple, actually. Because I wouldn't trust any JELLO Brother with the gift of fire...Fire can destroy, burn (obviously), crackle, obliterate, and make you warm. Isn't that reason enough?