<Intro Voice>
And now, somewhere in New York . . .
Hang on, “Suers”? Is that a real word? Well I think it matters.
It doesn’t?
Well,okay.
Anyway, somewhere in New York . . .
<End Intro Voice>
Hello, are you the man who attempted to sue McDonalds because eating large amounts of their food made you fat?
They
didn’t just make me fat, those things gave me multiple health problems.
Like high cholesterol, diabetes and all that?
Yeah, they did this to me.
And you hold absolutely no responsibility whatsoever for your condition.
Well, they made the stuff.
And you ate it.
So?
Do you have no self-control whatsoever?
How am I supposed to resist ready-made food that tastes good?
Find healthier ready-made food that tastes good maybe? Not eat this blatantly unhealthy food for every meal, every day? Make your own food perhaps?
What blatantly unhealthy food? I’ve never seen McDonalds, KFC or anyone else ever state the ingredients in their products.
A burger has meat bits, buns, lettuce, tomato, pickles, onions and cheese. If you don’t know what’s in your food you shouldn’t put it in your mouth.
But
I didn’t know what they’d added to it? And besides, there’s all the chemical
additives that get thrown in there, who knows what they do to a persons health.
Which is another law suite waiting to happen?
Hey, yeah, that’s right! Thanks for the idea!
No I – Urgh, I suppose that one is my fault. What do these chemicals have to do with your current law suite?
Nothing. That’s based upon something else. All the fat and stuff they put into it.
You didn’t know that KFC, a product where the “F” stands for “Fried” might have been cooked in, near or around fat? You didn’t know that a food named “Fries” might be fried, which requires some degree of fat? You didn’t notice the large vats of liquefied fat sitting off to the side of the counter where they pull said “Fries” from?
But that was behind the counter, I’m not supposed to see what’s behind the counter.
Like it’s not there?
Yeah.
Even though it is there, within sight
and you see what’s being done to it?
That area is for employees only.
And that prevents you from seeing what goes on there how?
Uh, well, uh, that is, er, I mean, uh, well, eh, I, er, uh, it does. It just does, okay.
You don’t know what’s in the food and you put it in your mouth anyway?
No, no. No. Uh, it’s the way it’s cooked, yeah, the way they cook it is bad, but all that’s behind the slots and you can’t see everything they do to it. And then there’s the way it’s all prepared in their factories. We don’t even know what goes into the food there.
So you’re saying that there are all sorts of bad things done to the food, making it incredibly unhealthy and it’s all kept quiet.
And knowing all that you still eat the stuff.
You don’t understand.
Really, how so?
Well, all this has been done deliberately. These fast food companies are monsters for doing this. They make this unhealthy food and don’t tell anyone what’s in it.
And yet you still eat there.
You’re
not getting it. The companies deliberately market these foods knowing that they
are harmful. Look at Happy Meals. They offer cheap pieces of plastic trash to
encourage children to eat at their places. And now look, we’ve got obese
children! 200-pound teenagers!
So you’re trying to tell me that it’s the fault of the companies that parents cannot control what their children eat?
Yeah – Wait, I mean, uh, that, uh, it’s the fault of the companies because, uh, well they, uh, . . . They put the food out there and deliberately tempt the children!
Which doesn’t change the fact that parents should be more involved in their children’s decisions on what to eat.
Yeah, but, uh, the corporations, uh . . . They’re the ones responsible.
Not the parents?
Yeah.
Why?
Because it’s the corporations that put the food out there, make it available. The ads, the prices, the free giveaways, all make it easier to buy this food rather than going for the healthier alternatives.
Have you ever bought a healthier alternative?
Well, no, but that’s because it’s too hard to resist the advertising campaign. Those signs and logos are everywhere, they’re too hard to ignore.
So you’re saying that it’s the fault of the companies that weak willed people buy their products?
Hey, I’m not week willed.
Did you ever consider making your own food with ingredients you bought and prepared yourself? Have you ever considered perhaps growing your own food? Did you even consider for a moment that maybe there was an alternative to having someone else prepare your food for you? Has it ever entered you mind that you could cook your own food, or are you too stupid to comprehend that it doesn’t take a corporation to do everything for you?
Look, stop calling me weak willed and stupid.
Then why didn’t you resist the temptation?
Uh, well, er, because, I’m not that strong willed.
That explains why you’re suing.
Hey! Stop saying mean things!
Oh no, I’m not going to stop now. You’re
fat, too lazy to get out and exercise, too weak willed to stop eating this
junk, and unwilling to accept responsibility f or your actions. You’re so
unimaginative and irresponsible that your only response is to sue someone for
causing your problems.
That’s no it at all. I want the companies to accept responsibility. Just like cigarette companies.
Don’t worry, I’ll get to both sides of that one soon enough.
Oh. Uh, so, uh, are you here to help?
Yes. Yes I am.
<THWACK>
<Intro Voice>
And so Grey marches off into the sunset, swinging The Mighty Trout high and sure to encounter stupidity again!
I still don’t think suers is a proper word.
No I don’t have a better idea. And I don’t have a thesaurus. I don’t have a dictionary either, but I’m pretty sure that suers is not a real word?
No I don’t really like my job that much, I’d rather sing.
Yes I do like being paid for – Oh. Okay then, I’ll shut up now.
<End Intro Voice>
