Rules And Regulations

It's not all fun and games people! Kurtism is a serious(ly silly) religion and as a Kurtian you are expected to take it seriously (occasionally)So here are a few things you should take into consideration before you call yourself an official Kurtain

#1: Are you eligible to become a Kurtian?

Sadly, it is impossible for some people to become Kurtians because they are unable to do his followings or imitate him perfectly. Of course if you can’t do these things you can still become a Kurtian but you won’t have the satisfaction of freaking your friends out!

Ur not a Kurtian if you:

Like Skipping meals, Diet...EVER!! Are a vegetarian or vegan, are diabetic, can’t fake a German accent, can’t do any types of sport...ever, are allergic to fur, don’t like body hair, don’t like curly (blue) hair (but this doesn’t really matter if you’re only into the evolution Kurt), are afraid of circus people (carnies, I think), don’t like The Beetles or if you simply think romance and chivalry is dead.

(Note about Diabetic, Vegan and vegetarian...um...notes. You CAN become a Kurtian with any of these but I thought maybe I should put those up because they make sense with the eating habits ur supposed to have. I am a vegetarian though and if the founder of Kurtism is one it must be okay!!)

#2: What not to do

Here is a list of things that you really should not say/do to another Kurtian or do/say in the vicinity of another Kurtian (God I love the crap I learn in English).

DO NOT:

1)Go to Iceland and when you come back do nothing but complain about the constant smell of brimstone/sulphur. (I’ve been twice and can honestly say that I am ADDICTED that smell no matter what they constantly say in the X-men!)

2) Go to Europe but decide at the last minute that France is Tres cool while Germany is sehr langwielich (I used to take German)

3) Give up the chance to learn German in School (I, unfortunately, did this and had to say 15 hail Nightcrawler’s to make up for it!)

4) Invite all your friends around to do a group waxing session (I reeeeeally hope I only have to refer to the girls with this one!)

5) Tell any Kurtian that you’re sure The Beetles didn’t write they’re own songs (actually, this doesn’t matter because any true fan will just laugh at you for a long time)

6)Refer to Kurt as “Fuzz butt” it’s blaspheme and conjures up some really, really bad mental images.

7) Refer to Kurt as “The one who needs a shave” the person who said this knows who they are and they also know that I WILL hunt them down someday!

8)(if you write fan fiction)give Kurt the wrong European accent “Just to see what he’d sound like”. Kurt Wagner should not, repeat, should NOT. EVER. say “vive la France”!!!