Dark Cloud

PS2

2001

My wife actually bought this game, and on one bored evening I decided to pick it up myself. I have played worse. This is not a bad game, but over all it is a pretty blasé dungeon crawler, But not without a few glimmers of originality.

An evil king goes and summons an evil Genie, (which could be easily mistaken for Ma Gin Boo’s Brother). This Genie then goes and wreaks havoc on the countryside, because that is what evil monsters do. The main character is a country boy who lives in said countryside. I’m sure we can all figure out what happens next. He survives the attack uninjured and are confronted by a Fairy King (insert ‘gay’ joke here) who tells you that your town has not been destroyed, but put into magic balls (insert ‘ball’ joke here) and amazingly all the balls were flung into the local dungeon. The Fairy King (hehe, I said “fairy”) then gives you a magic jewel that unlocks the magic balls ([sigh], insert ‘gay ball’ joke), and lets you go on your merry way.

Now here is the original part. The balls (that’s it no more!) can contain buildings, people, or pieces of buildings. Once you retrieve parts of your village it is up to you to decide were it goes. When you start a new “village” you have nothing but an empty field. So if you want an item shop you have to find the shop, the door, the awning, the porch light, and the shopkeeper before you can buy items, and then place it were ever you want it. Also everyone in the town usually wants their house in a certain way. Some might want to be close to the water, or away from an annoying neighbor. And once everyone has all their houses finished and where they want it, you get a bonus. This is the part of the game I enjoyed the most, developing the town and moving around houses to make everyone happy.

The level-upping system is different as well. Your characters only level up through uncommon items usually given out in completed houses. Weapons however level-up based on use. Weapons also have materia-like jewel slots, however once the weapon levels up the jewel and the bonus it gave get absorbed into the weapon and become permanent. At level 5 you can “status break” your weapon and turn it into a jewel itself that can them be used in newer, better weapon.

While rearranging the town is fun, trudging through the dungeons to get pieces isn’t. After the first 15 to 20 floors, you don’t really see anything new. After the beginning of the game there is little additional plot. Each new town comes with an obligatory party member, but other than getting them into the party they do almost nothing for the plot.

With the limited power-ups, you really only use the other characters to pass certain obstacles. For example, one character and jump over ravines, and another hits buttons with his hammer to open a door. You would be able to forget about them, except there are “limit” floors were you are forced, among other things, to use only one character. These can be game enders. You really can’t go back and level up, because it only really affects your weapon and it takes a lot of leveling up to make weapon useful. So you must keep your other characters powered up for the one time you actually will need them while making sure your main character is still powerful enough to handle the rest of the baddies. And if you can’t get the balance right, not even the reset button can save you.

I think I was a bit too old for this game. Even with it’s Teen rating it seem to be meant more for the younger, casual gamer. Which might explain why my wife got it in the first place. This is the kind of game that you should get if you don’t care too much about the plot and don’t like complex battle systems, but you do want some plain old dungeon crawling, with a bit of city building thrown in.

One more thing. One character you can get is a good genie named Ruby. I renamed her Bouncy. I swear her boobs are made of super balls! When she sits still they jiggle! There should be armor for her called “Sport Bra”. I guess what I’m tiring to say is, her breasts tend to move around a lot.

What liked: Town building, the town building screen, and finishing up a house and making the owner happy with it’s location.

What disliked: Boring dungeons, useless party members, a DBZ reject bad guy, and the pair of elastic boobs. (Yes that’s right! I didn’t like them! You know why? Because no women ever, EVER, will have boobs like that! It is physically impossible, unnecessary and demeaning!)

What to expect: Your typical dungeon hunt RPG, with a little town building added for flavor.

What not to expect: Deep Involving plot, large party, Blood and gore.

What's so different from this and other games of it's genre: Shoot, I need more beard, hmmm lets see, Door…check, Bob the store clerk…Check…

Ratings on:

Control: 6 – They are simple enough to use, although changing party members and weapons screens takes a while. And some baddies tend to knock you down and then, knock you down again before you can get up.

Graphics: 8 – The graphics are well done, even though the main character is a little too surprised a little too often. And the previously mentioned magic beasts.

Sound: 5 - Nothing new, or really interesting, in fact some of the in-town music is down right shrill.

Style: 5 - It was a good idea but it doesn’t really go anywhere, You go through the dungeon until you get all the pieces, then on to the next town. Repeat five times and you have the game.

1st hour: My town is coming around nicely.

5th hour: woo hoo, all done, now on to the next town!

3rd day: Ok, another empty town and a dungeon, yea.

1st week: Wow, yet another empty town and dungeon. Yea.

#1 reason why I hate this game: Turning my serious game review into a discussion about the over-animation of the female figure with Bevis and Butthead-isk humor.