Last night was bad. Thats ok. I should expect for nights like that to come along more frequently now. I feel bad, though, still, like I just got dumped. I feel like I'm not in a relationship with him anymore, so it hurts to talk to him or to think about him. Oh my God, why can't I just be normal?? If you don't get dumped, don't feel like you got dumped, especially at a time like this. It's seven days before he gets pumped full of drugs that are gonna make him feel like shit *all* the time, and all I can think about is something as stupid as this. I'm just gonna give him back his damn ring. I hate that stupid thing. I wanna drop it out of a plane. That thing's just been a terrible burden to me since yesterday afternoon; a reminder of how everything can go wrong so fast. I want to flush it down the toilet. I want to throw it into a stampede