I awoke with a start. There was obviously something very wrong. Oh no! It was the aftermath of Y22K. All the computer systems had shut down overnight and the station had stop spinning, leaving my explosive flatulence to propel me somewhere out into the hallway, where a crowd had gathered to watch me slumber in midair. Twenty millenia without a crash and the computers had to lose it on Bean Burrito Night.
I was able to push off the wall and float into my room and escape humiliation until work started. I was in charge of the trillions of nanorobots that roamed our station looking for things to fix or patch up. It was a small station two kilometers in diameter. I inhabited the zone one kilometer from the hub with the other humans. The station spun at more than 1 rpm so we lived in a 1 g environment. Having achieved transcendence centuries ago, we communicated telepathically and had no more use for ears, especially those pesky inner ears. Our ears had slowly evolved into antennae to pick up electrical signals. The outer edge was inhabited by the giant bat-slugs of Jupiter who were accustomed to the increased gravity. The inner portion was devoted to the icicle people of Pluto who needed little gravity or heat. In fact, we made them stick to the side of the large hub column, where they were close to our water supply. Occasionally, when I let my guard down, the helpful nanorobots would mistake them for real icicles and melt them. Today was one such occasion.
The computer crash had caused the little buggers to malfunction and they had already turned half the Plutonians to puddles. I got to my office and by that time the central computer was back up. My assistants were so wrapped up they hadn't even heard about my sleep-floating episode. They were working feverishly clicking and typing trying to stop the holocaust and had been doing so for hours. They were having no luck controlling the robots, so I took charge. I thought, " Everybody depends on computers too much nowadays." Then I pulled down the "auto-don't-melt-the-ice-people" lever and they stopped melting and I saved the day.
