Anastasia
Well...um, so you want to hear about me, huh? Either that or you are just so bored you don't
have anything else to do but read about me. Lucky you. Bunny will be so thrilled that I finally
wrote this out. I think she asked me for it months ago. Sorry Bunny, but you know me, I
procrastinante as much as possible. Let's see. I guess I'll start with the basics. On August 8th
1981, in Lelbourn, Georgia, I popped out of my mother before they even got her to the delivery
room. My parents are Candy and John Malaspina. I have one brother, Brian (who's 12), and a
sister, Jennifer (who's 15). Why my parents named me Anastasia of all things, I do not know.
Maybe it was the 60's getting to them or something, who knows. I lived in Cary, Illinois for
most of my life, but ironically, I've grown up the most here in Mississippi in these last four
years. I had white hair for most of the duration of my youth. I grew up mostly climbing
trees,hanging by my shorts, breaking windows, swimming, camping, pelting my enemies with apples
from the tree, and walking into parked cars(there's a story behind that one but I won't go into
that, it's too embarassing and too long). My parents sent me to Catholic school for eight years
of my life, which, I think, accounts for my present abnormalities. Brainwashing can be a nutty
experience. Finally I was released from my dear private school and set loose into the public
school system. The odd thing is that I actually miss my Catholic school sometimes. Only because
of the friendships I made there and the hell we were able to raise. For example, there was a
time where my friend, Emma, and I had done something particularly nasty to agravate our teacher.
Apparently the principle, Sr. Mary Catherine, didn't like it so much either. That day she called
us into her office and told us we were sadists. Interesting, coming from a nun. Lovely woman.
Okay, back to the rest of my life. I attended Cary-Grove Highschool for my freshmen year. That
was when I got my 15 minutes of fame, and then some, that I wish I'd never have gotten. Long
story-short (cuz I know your wondering just when this will end) there was an awful tragedy that
was brutally plastered through the media nationwide and I was dead center in the middle of it. I
lost my boyfriend at the time due to the tragedy. And I managed to punch a reporter in the face
for getting too close to me. I don't like media people. They're like ambulance chasers or thirty
wolves.
Then dear old daddy decides he's going to quite his job in Chicago and move us down to
Mississippi. I wondered if he had suffered a mental breakdown of some sort. For weeks I didn't
believe him. When they started packing up the moving truck, I earl died of shock. Oh, Lord, he's
moving me into the middle of nowhere. He's really going to do it. After one day at Tupelo
Highschool, I returned home to inform my parents that I was moving back to Illinois. I felt like
a rare peice at a museum at that school. People would come up to me just to hear the way I
spoke. While I was trying hard to decipher what in the hell they were saying. I seriously
thought that "y'all" was just something they said in the movies, I didn't really think that
people still used the term - and so easily. It made me cringe. Now I catch myself saying it all
the time.
I went through some tough times when I moved here. I let the way other people looked affect me.
I let the skinny preps at Tupelo bother me because of their slimness. It was nothing like
Chicago, where everyone is who they are and high school kids do not look like toothpicks. The
cliques where also new to me because they were so tightly woven and it depended on who your
daddy was or where you were born. I'm sorry, but I'm a Yankee. Proud of it too. Anyway, I
stopped seeing myself as I wanted to, and tried to conform. This led me down a long road to the
hospital. I was a toothpick and I looked nasty. I can say that now, but I thought I was still
fat at the time. It took away two years of my life. Eventually, with the help of real friends
(doctor's don't do shit), I overcame it. When I overcame it is when I really started to grow up.
You could say I rediscovered myself. Maybe. But, whatever I did, it made me who I am today.
I just want to say to all of you, my friends, thankyou. You will never know how much your
friendship has meant to me. You might not even know it, but a lot of you have helped me through
things just by being my friend and being there to laugh with me. I love y'all.
There are things I did not mention here, but I'm sure you understand, I didn't really want to
write a book here. Well, oops, looks like I did anyways. Sorry about that. Congratulations, if
you've actually made it this far! That's me in a very big fat nutshell.
Email: skibunny@bolt.com
