look at me,
i'm standing
the sun begins to climb
and still falls down
on my young face
i'm not a man
but i'm standing
(look at me)
i'm standing strong
on my two feet
just a child
standing alone
-waiting-
for someone to tell me
what i need to do
so young and ignorant
so aged and wise
of all the things i know,
i know nothing best
...and the sun still climbs...
i've sat on thrones of gold
beset with jewels of glass
worn the plastic crown
in charcoal halls
of cities whose streets
are paved with blood
of martyrs
-and the sun now stands high-
i've dined with rats
drinking from a paper cup
lifting with silver tines
the aliment of kings
(and the sun now falls)
i gaze upon the sky
wondering who watches
who looks down on me
as i walk and crawl
while i venture into
the black of nothing
that is my everything
who guides me?
though i walk blindly
through the woods
i hit no trees
i pass beneath
the lake of fire
and come away not burned
and why?
the sun approaches the ground
far on the horizon
*my star*
moves slowly toward the earth
as an estranged wife
seeing alive the husband
she long thought dead
and i'm still standing
~reflecting~
i see behind me the day
i heard my love
speak untruth
the day love became hate
turned snowflakes purest white
to smoldering coals
darkest sickly black
my angel now my demon
my savior now my killer
knock me down again
and yet i stand
~reflecting~
i see behind me the days
i let love pass me by
watch another venus
walk away because
i stood paralyzed
caught in the cold
unyielding
grasp of fear
deathly afraid to hear
no
scared not to fall down
but to struggle back
to my feet
and here i stand
twice the victim
of the broken goddess
i still stand strong
as the sun now hides
its warming face
behind the hills
to the west
i stand beneath
the new twilight
and i welcome the breath
of angels on me
angels that carry me
through my darkness
and set me standing
when i've fallen
i stand alone
and strong
in my twilight
below a million stars
below a million eyes
the gods are watching me
as i stand here
~realizing~
they're human
not one is my angel
not one my venus
none my goddess,
but people
like me they are
flesh (mortal)
like me they fall
and the strong come back
to stand on their feet
-and i'm standing too-
(look)
and i'm thinking
wondering
agonizing
why did it take me so long
for me to realize
they all are human?
it took too long to figure out
there is no right or wrong
black or white
only pain
and lies that hurt
but wounds will heal
for we're all human
and they stand and fall
and stand again
like me
i look up to the moon
and the stars
-my stars-
watch the gods watching me
(not a man)
feel the angels holding me
(just a child)
and as i stand-
eighteenth time
under saturn's hand
i know now where i am
i stand safely cared for
by a presence i can't see
but still i trust
look at me,
i'm standing
(not alone, but) strong