AUTHOR'S NOTE: This takes place during BBB. That would be the upcoming episode
due to air on February 10, 1998. That said, I haven't seen the ep but I'm
creating theories and making guesses and taking all that from just the thirty
second preview.
DISCLAIMER: None of the characters of this fic belong to me. They belong to
Joss "Da Man" Whedon. Any dialogue that appears on the show also belongs to
Joss while any that doesn't belongs to me. No toe-stepping is intended. The
title is taken from an Air Supply song. The quote is taken from the Air Supply
song "Making Love Out Of Nothing At All"
STORY NOTES: This is the first of three plus an epilogue. This one starts at
the beginning of the preview. At this point, all of these stories step out of
the time-stream and exist within mine.
"If you keep doing that, you're gonna sprain your neck," she told him quietly. Absently, her hand drifted downwards to her still full glass of coke and she stirred it with her finger.
"What?" he asked in suprise. He looked back at her and blushed. "You must think I'm nervous and all, right? Well..no..no..." he sighed as he watched her unconvinced face. "I feel like I'm going home to give my parents my report card."
"You worry too much. She'll love it..what girl wouldn't?" Buffy Summers reassured him with the faintest of smiles.
"Right..okay...tell that to my bladder."
Buffy lifted an eyebrow, "I..don't...want to know." She looked away from Xander and out towards the dance floor where her best-friend Willow Rosenberg was dancing with Oz. They looked so perfect..so utterly lost in each others's arms.
"Buffy?"
She watched as Willow laughed at something Oz said and he beamed with pride. He leaned forward and kissed her cheek and then they both just gazed at each other.
"Buffy?"
This was her shy friend. The one she'd had to push and now she was the happy one. Well, that was okay because she deserved happiness. They all did. Didn't they?
"Buff, you're scaring me," Xander said as he moved his stool closer to her. He put his hand on her shoulder and she blinked.
"I'm sorry...I...I...was just...thinking..."
"About Angel," Xander said softly. He tilted her head so that it was on his shoulder, "It will get better. One way or another..it will get better. You have to believe that."
"I just wish I knew if he was totally lost to me," she replied, accepting the warmth and friendship of his semi-embrace. It was getting harder and harder to be the strong one.
"Just keep the faith," Xander responded, not willing to tell her what he suspected. She couldn't deal with that reality yet and he wasn't about to hurt her. The idea that she could never love and be loved by Angel would devastate her.
"Thanks..you're a good friend, Xander." Buffy said with a laugh. She looked up from his shoulder and across the dance floor and then she smiled, "Looks like you're on, Romeo."
"Huh? What? Oh...oh man." Xander swallowed hard. "Do..do I look okay?"
She grinned, "You look great. Go. She won't know what hit her."
He leaned across and kissed her on the cheek, "Thanks. Oh, man...oh man." Taking a deep breath, he started his slow walk across the dance floor to where his girlfriend, Cordelia Chase was standing with her friends. He glanced back at Buffy and she brushed him forward with a wave of her hand. He nodded and continued his slow walk.
"Cordelia..hi..uh..hi," Xander said, suddenly shy. She looked up at him and smiled weakly.
"Xander..hi.." she looked at her friends and sighed, "We..we need to talk." she reached out and grabbed his arm. "Alone."
"Alone, okay..yeah..alone is good with me." He looked back at Buffy and flashed her a huge grin. She gave him a thumbs' up and then he turned and followed Cordelia outside into the cool air.
As soon as he felt the ice of winter sweep across his arms, he leaned forward and pulled Cordelia towards him. Grinning, he kissed her. She murmured her consent and wrapped her arms around his chest. They stood like that for a couple of moments and then she pushed him away. "We need to talk."
"No, we don't," Xander chuckled, leaning forward again. She put a palm flat on his chest and kept him at bay.
"This is serious. It's about us."
"Oh?" Suddenly his eyes snapped open, "Oh! Right..I got.."
"Xander.."
"No..no..I got something for you.." "Xander.."
"It's kind of like a reminder of us, ya know..."
"Xander, there is no us."
"And it's..huh? wait a minute..I must have wax in my ears because I could swear you just said.."
"I did..Xander..this isn't working." Cordelia replied, refusing to make eye contact.
He reached forward and placed a hand under her chin," I don't accept that. I can't.."
She looked up at him and for a moment she allowed her cheek to slide against his palm and then she shook her head, "We should have known better from the start, Xander...this isn't you...this isn't me."
"Is that what your friends told you?"
She looked down at the ground and then looked back up at him, "Please..don't make this harder than it needs to be. God..this just makes more sense. Isn't that a good enough reason?"
"No.."
"Well, it is for me," she whispered, turning to walk away from him. He reached out and grabbed her arm. He looked up at her with such wide and openly hurt eyes that she almost caved.
"Please..just..please." And with that she pushed away from him. He watched for a moment and then shook his head.
"No...no..not good enough." Mustering up both his anger and courage, he followed her into the Bronze. He scanned the room and finally spotted her over by the bar, hands spread wide on the counter as if she were trying to calm herself.
"How long have you been planning this?" Xander asked as he approached. She looked up at him and quickly pulled herself together.
"Xander.."
"Well, you want to know what I've been planning?" He laughed, "Not like it matters now." He reached into his pocket and pulled out a necklace. Hand shaking, he handed it to her.
She took it from him, "It's beautiful."
"It yours."
She stared at the silver heart for a long moment and then shook her head and whispered, "I can't take this."
"Why not..you can use the edges to stab someone else through the heart. If you hit 'em just right, it won't hurt that much."
"That's not fair."
"And this is? Is it them? Can they not handle me?" Xander hissed, pointing dramatically at the small group of cliquers that had gathered a few feet away.
"There are things.." then she closed her eyes and looked up at him. "Look..it's just over. Dont make a big deal of it. It was fun..it's over." She turned away from him and dropped the necklace on to the counter. Then she moved away from him and past her friends who were attempting to tell her that they were sorry but they knew that the romance never had a chance.
"Xand?"
"This isn't happening." He laughed. "What am I talking about..of course it is. I'm the idiot here." He looked at Buffy. "What was I thinking?"
She wrapped her arms around him, "The same thing I was."
