The Florencia Lozano Homepage - Fan Fiction
Chapter 8
“Delgado and Associates.” Todd stared at the sign as he approached Tea’s office in Angel square. It was a small, brick building with a green awning just up the street from the waterfront…unassuming but very respectable. It was an old, converted counting house that was owned by a shipping company back in the day when Llanview owed much of its prosperity to the Llantano River…before the Lords and Buchanans squeezed out the local shipping companies for more lucrative real estate deals that caused record unemployment and economic decline. Angel Square then floundered and deteriorated into a drug infested, crime-filled burrow, but slowly, it was rising from the ashes.
The building still had a lot of its old-world charm with leaded glass windows, heavy oak-paneled doors with brass fixtures and old-fashioned street lamps along the front of its charming brick sidewalks. It was part of a revitalization project in Angel Square and Tea wanted to be a part of it.
It was 5:00 PM and the office was closed, but Tea was still working, her workload increased by Antonio’s lack of experience. These days she barely made it out of the office till well after 7:00 and Todd would often pop in after hours to drag her home.
He stepped in quietly, noticing the receptionist was gone and the place deserted. The office included a small reception area and a long hallway that lead down to a couple of private offices, a conference room and an impressive legal library-a gift from Todd.
Tea’s face was bent over a legal pad, deep in thought, and didn’t notice Todd leaning against the doorframe, watching her. Sitting back in her green, leather chair, polished and professional in a charcoal suit, her brow was knitted in deep concentration as she stared at the ceiling. Then, quickly leaning over the pad again, she crossed out what she had written replacing it with something else.
This was the woman he fell in love with…her lovely face, her beautiful mind, her passionate spirit…an intellectual beauty whose rapture for living and loving had reanimated his life. She was his greatest admirer and his greatest defender…his lover…his wife…and mother to his precious Alma. It still astonished him that such an exceptional woman could love a man like him, and that at some point in his life he was actually willing to settle for a Blair.
“It’s quitting time.”
Tea looked up and flashed him a smile, his heart leaping in response.
“What are you doing here? I thought you were picking Starr up at Blair’s,” she said, looking at her watch.
Todd walked in and sat in a chair across from her desk, pushing back his long hair.
“Yeah…I’m on my way over there now.”
“What’s wrong? You seem…troubled.”
Todd got up and paced around his hands shoved deeply into his pockets.
“I…shouldn’t have let Starr sleep over at her place. It doesn’t feel right.”
Tea got up and walked over to him, stroking the lapel of his brown jacket with her hand, aimlessly.
“I heard you pacing around all night, amor…you didn’t get any sleep. But…I’m sure Starr had a good time with her mother…and Blair’s been wonderful with her. I think she’s earned this time with Starr. But…I agree…it was strange not having Starr at home last night. When I laid Alma down, her little eyes kept darting toward the doorway. She was so adorable, Todd…I think she was waiting for Starr to come and say good-night to her the way she always does.”
Todd stared into her dark, lustrous eyes, recalling Alma’s eyes…so much like her mother’s.
“Tea…I wish…Starr was yours,” he whispered.
Tea sighed, her eyes filling with regret.
“I couldn’t love her anymore if she was my own flesh and blood. Do you think this is easy for me, Todd?” Tea asked, her voice breaking. “Starr and I have become so close and then…suddenly…there’s Blair, supplanting her maternal rights and shoving her biology in my face as if I have no right to love Starr…pushing me aside as if I don’t matter at all…as if I’m nothing,” she said as tears welled up in her eyes and she wiped them away quickly.
“Hey, hey…come on, Tea. Starr loves you. You know that.”
“Yes…I know. But…I’m not her mother…Blair is. And we can’t change that.”
Todd put his arms around her, holding her close and burying his face in her hair.
“I know you’re not her mother…but…you’re the mother she deserves.” Todd touched her face tenderly, his fingertips tracing her delicate bone structure. “Thank you.”
Tea looked up at him, confused.
“For what?”
“For loving Starr. And…for loving me. For making me happier than I ever thought I could be…than I ever deserved to be.”
Tea reached up and kissed him, her soft lips finding his, her tongue melting into the wet warmth of his mouth. He grasped her head to pull her closer, wanting a deeper connection…wanting to dissolve and disappear into their intimacy as his hungry mouth locked against hers…needy…his tongue probing mindlessly, reaching deeply inside her, wanting to find her soul and join it to his, to let the sentient world disappear and escape into a sensual dreamworld where only they existed.
“I can’t breath,” whispered Tea, pulling away slightly. Todd sighed deeply, breathing hard and leaning against her as she held on to his shoulder, aroused and shaken by his desperate and arduous kiss. “You’re kissing me like it’s the last time, amor…what’s wrong?”
He pulled away from her and stared into her eyes, unable to answer.
“Todd? What ‘s wrong? Last night…you had a terrible nightmare. I heard you cry out in your sleep,” she said, taking his hand in hers. “It’s been a long time since that’s happened. What were you dreaming about?”
Todd turned away form her.
“I…don’t really remember. But…it scared the hell out of me, Tea. Something’s wrong…something’s happening and…I can’t control it.”
“What’s happening? I don’t understand?”
“I don’t know. Look…it’s nothing. Just me and my paranoia, that’s all. I need to see Starr…I’m going to Blair’s right now to get her.”
“Okay. Do you want me to go with you?”
“No. I want you to go home. I…want you and Alma to be there when I bring Starr home. That’s what I want, Tea…I want everything the way it was a month ago.”
“Todd…everything is fine. Our life is perfect…isn’t it?”
Todd walked up to her and nodded.
“Yeah…perfect,” he said pulling her into his arms and holding her forcefully, crushing her petite frame against him. A chill ran through her as she felt his heart pounding against her. Pulling away, he suddenly headed for the door, then stopped and turned around.
“I love you, Tea…never forget that,” he said, holding her gaze before turning and walking away.
*****Blair carried a blue, plastic bowl filled with popcorn and headed down the hallway toward Starr’s room, humming happily, casual and relaxed in a yellow sweater and jeans.
Todd had finally let Starr sleep over and they had spent two whole days together. Blair had taken her shopping, to the movies and last night they had stayed up till all hours playing video games and talking like they use to when she was small. It was the first time since she’d left prison that she’d felt like she was home…like she’d gotten a semblance of her life back.
As she entered Starr’s room she noticed her folding a sweater and stuffing it into her backpack.
“Starr? Honey…what are you doing?”
“I’m packing. Daddy called…he’s suppose to pick me at 6:00, remember?”
“But…I made popcorn. I thought…maybe…we could call your daddy and see if you could stay another night. What do you say to that?”
Starr stopped and looked up at her mother, her bright green eyes wide and innocent.
“But…I have soccer practice in the morning”
“Well, I can take you, silly.”
“But…I…I miss Alma…and daddy…and…”
“And Tea?”
Starr looked away, her eyes filled with guilt.
“It’s okay, honey…I understand. I’ve been gone a long time…but…I’m home now. And I think you should live with me, don’t you? I’m your mother, Starr…we’re family…you belong with me.”
Starr sat on her bed and looked down at her feet, wiggling her toes anxiously.
“But…what about daddy? And school? And…I…I like living at Windsor Lake…it’s my home now,” she said, as she struggled with her words, straining to hold back tears.
Blair’s heart sank. In the last few days Blair had tried to recapture their past relationship, the mother and daughter closeness they once shared, but…all Starr did was talk about her “new” life, her “new friends and her “new” family. It was clear that Todd and Tea had seduced her with their suburban domesticity and her mind began to panic as she felt Starr’s love slipping away. Placing the bowl down on the dresser she walked over and sat on the bed beside her.
“Starr…I want you to stay with me. Don’t you want that?”
“Yes…but…I want to be with daddy, too.”
“Well…I know you do…but, you can’t live with both of us, Starr…we’re divorced. And…a daughter belongs with her mother. I guess…I’m asking you to choose, honey.”
Starr looked up at her, tears streaming down her face as she struggled with her feelings, her heart torn, aching with the pain of leaving her family or disappointing her mother.
“I…just want to stay in one place. I…I think I want to stay where I am…with daddy.”
Blair froze. She got up and walked to the window, Starr followed her.
“I’m sorry, mommy…but…I miss being home…and I miss Hedda and my little sister. And I have friends at school now…a best friend named Rosalie…and I want to see them. I can still see you all the time…and sleep over too. But…I want to live with daddy and Tee.”
Blair continued to stare out the window, her back to Starr. She couldn’t speak, choking on the bile that filled her throat as she listened to her own child rejecting her…nullifying her love. Todd and Tea had robbed her…neutralized her greatest weapon, her maternal power…and she needed to get it back. Finally she turned around and faced Starr, and pulling her by the hand she walked her back over to the bed and sat beside her, stroking her long, blond hair with affection.
“Starr…I’m afraid I can’t let you go back to Windsor Lake.”
Starr’s mouth opened with disappointment.
“Why? I want to go home.”
“Honey…I love you more than anything in the world…and no one can ever love you the way I do. And…it’s my job as your mother to protect you. There are reasons why I can’t let you live with your daddy. Good reasons.”
“What reasons?”
She panicked for an instant, her heart faltering, her protective, maternal instincts kicking in…not wanting to cause her child any pain. Suddenly her resolve weakened and she bit her lip to keep from revealing any more, but…Todd had left her no choice. She was out of options. Blair took a deep breath, determined not lose her daughter to Todd…no matter what she had to do. This was the moment.
“Starr. I’m going to tell you why you can’t live with your father. Now that you’re older…I think it’s time you knew the truth about him…about…what he’s capable of…and what sort of man he is.”
Starr looked up at her mother curiously.
“What do you mean?”
Blair reached down and took her small hand in hers and looked into Starr’s lovely, childish eyes.
“Do you know what “rape” means…?”
*****
2003 Copyright by Trog
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