The Florencia Lozano Homepage - Fan Fiction
LIES FEARS & LOVE
BY TROG |
CHAPTER
55 |
chapter 55
THE PENTHOUSE
Todd spread lotion on Leo’s little belly and legs as Starr giggled standing beside him. Todd had given Leo a bath and Starr insisted on helping out as Todd put a fresh diaper on him as Leo laid on the changing table.
“Boys have funny pee-pees, daddy,” she laughed. “They’re yucky.”
Todd stopped and looked down at his strangely inquisitive daughter.
“Yeah, well I hope you’ll always feel that way, Starr. Why don’t you go in that drawer and get Leo some pajamas,” he said, as he picked Leo up and held him in the air. Leo giggled wildly at his father.
Starr picked out a white, footed sleeper and brought it to her father. She watched as he laid Leo on the sleeper, gently sliding his little arms and legs into the garment and snapping it closed around him. Then he picked him up and walked him over toward the crib.
“There, my man...you’re all cleaned up...now let’s see if you can get to sleep. Give you’re sister a kiss,” he said, holding him as Starr planted a kiss on his cheek and then held him closely, breathing in the fragrant baby lotion mixed with the sweetness of Leo’s skin. Finally Todd put him down. Leo started to cry the moment Todd set him down, so he picked him up again.
“Okay, Leo. You can stay up a little longer. How about you, Starr, did you wash behind your ears?”
“Yes...and I washed my fingernails...they were all dirty from the woods.”
“And you brushed your teeth?”
“Yes,” she said grinning at him.
“Okay, how about you play with Leo for a while...tire him out...while I go check on Tee?”
“Okay....daddy....can I see mommy tomorrow?”
“Starr...we’ll see how she‘s feeling tomorrow. We need to wait a few days...okay?”
Starr nodded sadly. Todd placed Leo on the floor and he scurried away quickly toward the toy shelf as Starr followed him.
He hurried down the hallway into his bedroom and entered the bathroom. The room was warm and steamy as Tea laid back in the tub, her head leaning back against the rim with her eyes closed. Her hair was wet and slicked back and her skin was flushed and wet and he could see her distorted, pink nakedness through the fading bubbles beneath the water. Leaning against the wall beside the tub, he quietly watched her...wanting her. Sensing his presence, Tea opened her eyes and smiled up at him.
“Hi,” she said.
He walked over and knelt beside the tub, rolling up the sleeves of his loose black shirt and grabbing a puffy, green sponge started washing her neck and shoulders delicately.
“You know I just gave Leo a bath...I’m getting really good at this,” he said as his hand broke the warm surface of the soapy water and submerged. Tea laid back and closed her eyes as she felt the sponge’s rough texture circling around her breast.
“Does that feel good,” he whispered.
Tea opened her eyes and with her dripping hands caressed his face, running her wet fingers through his hair and pulling his head into the tub, seeking his mouth. They kissed slowly and moaned softly as Todd’s hand reached into the water and dove under, around her slippery back to pull her closer.
“Querido...are the kids up?” gasped Tea.
Todd sighed deeply and leaned against her.
“Yep.”
“May be we’d better wait.”
Todd stood up.
“Come on...let’s get you out of that tub before you get all pruny,” he said, as he gave her a hand and lifted her up. Tea stepped out of the tub. Todd could see the pain in her face as her battered feet touched the floor and as he wrapped a large towel around her, he took her in his arms and held her quietly against him.
“Are you okay...you’ve been through a lot today,” he said.
She nodded, but her eyes began to mist and before she knew it tears were falling down her face and she was crying against him. Clasping her hands tightly around his back, she pulled him closer to her, wanting to feel that security and strength she always felt in his arms.
“I was so scared, Todd. There was a moment when I thought I’d never see you again...or our babies. But in my soul I knew you’d find me...I just knew it. I just felt you getting closer and closer.”
“I told you...you can count on me, Tea. I’ll never let anything happen to you or those kids in there,” he said, wiping her tears. “Hey sit down,” he said, as Tea sat down on the closed toilet seat.
Todd walked over to the medicine cabinet, took out a first aid kit and sat on the floor in front of her. He put her feet on his lap and started examining them. Her feet. Those delicate, unarmed feet that kept walking up that rugged mountain path, the feet that dug fiercely into the dirt to leave a trail for him, the feet that kept her alive for him. He noted the broken nails, the deep graceful arches, the red gashes and purple bruises staining their creamy skin. Her beautiful, battle-scarred feet. He kissed them adoringly before he began removing assorted tubes and bandages from the kit and proceeded to nurse her feet quietly.
“Carlotta and Vicki called...I told them to come by tomorrow...not tonight. And I called the hospital and talked to Lulu. I‘m picking her up tomorrow morning after we go to the police station to make our stupid statements,” he said as he applied antiseptic ointment to her cuts and scratches. Tearing open different size bandages, he applied them to the small cuts on the balls of her feet. Than he fingered the large gash along the side of her foot, the gash which had left a bloody trail.
“This probably needs stitches, Delgado.”
“No...it’s not that deep,” she said.
“I’ll put some of these neat butterfly things on it,” he said excitedly as he tore open more packages with his teeth and proceeded to make a neat row of butterfly bandages down the length of the gash as Tea smiled down at him.
“And...what about Blair?” Tea asked quietly
Todd stopped, then continued his task without looking up at her.
“Blair’s in jail where she belongs.”
“She won’t be there for long...and Starr’s going to want to see her.”
“Never!” barked Todd, as he used a pair of small scissors to trim her broken jagged toenails.
“Todd...she still Starr’s mother.”
Todd threw everything back into the first aid kit chaotically and stood up quickly. She sensed the simmering anger rising in him, the anger he’d been trying to control for hours since they’d returned.
“She’s noone’s mother...she’s a poisonous viper...she’s the same lying, selfish bitch she’s been her whole scheming life...but don’t tell me she’s a mother...not after this, Tea...not after what she did to her own daughter,” he shouted. “I called Dr. Parker earlier....she told me that Blair told them to...dispose of the baby! Like it was a piece of trash.”
Todd closed his eyes, feeling the pain of a loss he didn’t even understand and Tea let him grieve for his unborn child. A few minutes passed before she spoke again.
“Look, Todd, I have more reason to want her behind bars than you do...she almost killed me....but even I can tell that she’s mentally disturbed...that she’s suffering from some kind of postpartum psychosis. She was completely delusional when we were up on that mountain.”
“An even better reason to keep her away from Starr.”
“Yes...for now...but eventually you’ll have to let Starr see her...for Starr’s sake...not yours.”
He leaned his head up against the wall, looking up at the ceiling, steaming with rage. Tea got up, and walked over to him, putting her arms around his waist and drawing him into her, placing her face against his chest. Enfolding her in his arms, he let his anger drift away from him as she anchored him to her love. A few hours ago he’d been running blindly up a dark mountain path, lost in his despair, thinking he’d never see her again and now here he was in the sanctuary of her arms. Soft. Safe.
“Thanks for fixing my feet, querido...they feel much better.”
“Yeah...well...I did the best I could but...you’re in dire need of a pedicure.”
Tea laughed and smacked him playfully on his chest.
“Get out of here...I need to dry my hair. And you better go and check on those wild children of ours since Lourdes isn’t around to keep them in line while we get...distracted.”
Todd pulled her towel off playfully and pulled her into him, feeling her warm, naked body pressing firmly against him and breathing in her delicious womanly scent.
“Fine...but I’ll be back in a while to collect my fee for all that medical attention...everything has a price, you know,” said Todd before leaving the room.
(LATER)
Tea pulled a white, silk nightgown out of the drawer and quickly slipped it on over her perfumed, naked body. She fingered the delicate, antique lace along the bodice and checked herself in the mirror, wanting to feel warm and soft and feminine after being exposed to the cold, brutal violence of that rough mountain. She brushed her long, dark hair with her silver hairbrush and then placed it back on the dresser in its place, beside Todd’s silver comb. Smiling, she looked down at her mangled feet, remembering how lovingly Todd had cared for them and tears rose up in her eyes. She had never felt so safe and so loved.
As she headed for the door to see Todd and her children, they suddenly appeared there as if by magic. Todd stood there in the doorway with Leo in his arms and Starr was beside him, holding her father’s hand. Todd’s hazel eyes took in her pure, womanly beauty as she stood there smiling at them in her beautiful white gown.
“I was just coming to say goodnight,” said Tea walking over.
“Yeah, well, me and Starr and Leo...we’ve been talking and we wanted to ask you something,” said Todd, with a strange expression on his face.
“What?”
Todd pointed over to the loveseat at the bottom of the bed.
“Why don’t you sit down, Tea...get off your feet, okay?”
Tea looked at them, then went and sat down as he had asked.
Todd sat Leo down in front of her, then he got on his knees and Starr got on her knees beside him. They all stared up at her for a moment when Todd turned to Starr and nodded. Starr pulled a hand from behind her back and handed Tea a small bouquet of peach roses.
“Starr! These are beautiful! Thank you, querida.”
Then Todd picked up Leo and held him up in front of Tea.
“Leo has something for you, but you’ll have to pry it out of his hand.”
Tea reached out for Leo’s hand and opened his little fingers, pulling out the platinum and turquoise ring that she had left on the trail for Todd.
“Oh...I’d forgotten all about my ring! Thank you...mi hijo,” she said putting it back on her finger and planting a little kiss on Leo before Todd sat him back on the floor.
Todd stared up at her. and reaching a hand into his pocket he removed a small, black velvet box and handed it to her with a trembling hand.
“I was saving this for another occasion, but after today...well, it just seemed like the right time,” he said softly as he looked into her eyes which were welling up with tears.
Tea looked down, snapped open the cover to find a platinum ring with one large, round diamond in the center flanked by two smaller, heart-shaped diamonds. Todd and Tea looked at one another and the whole world faded into a soft light around them as their eyes connected at that secret place in the center of their being that know one else could reach.
“Tea Marissa Delgado...will you marry us?” said Todd in a quiet, trembling voice.
Tea stared into his beautiful face, then she looked at Starr who was smiling proudly and at her son who looked around in happy, infantile confusion.
“Yes,” shouted Tea, jumping off the loveseat on top of Todd who fell to the floor with her as Starr looked on laughing and Leo crawled around them trying to play. “Yes...I’ll marry all of you,” she said, as Todd leaned down and kissed her softly, staring into her wet, shiny eyes, then lying beside her, smiling.
“Can I be a flower girl, this time?” asked Starr.
Todd and Tea sat up on the floor. Todd grabbed Leo and held him as Tea pulled Starr onto her lap and kissed her.
“Absolutely, you will be my flower girl, querida.”
Starr hugged her and started to cry, remembering her mother. Tea held her and rocked her slowly.
“Everything is going to be okay, Starr. You’re safe. I’m not your real mother, but I couldn’t love you more if I was. You’re the sweetest, bravest girl I’ve ever known and I’m so honored to be in your life.”
“I love you, Tee. Please don’t leave us,” whimpered Starr.
Todd watched them, his eyes misting with guilt at her words and he could feel her pain inside him. His little girl had suffered so much abandonment in her young life, now she’d lost her mother, but he was determined to make it all up to her.
“Hey, Starr...Tea’s not leaving. And I’m not leaving...never again. When you wake up in the morning, I’m going to be here and so is Tea and Leo. This is forever,” said Todd, reaching out and taking Tea’s hand. “We’re forever.” Starr climbed into her father’s lap and hugged him tightly along with Leo.
They all huddled closely together when Tea noticed the drowsy eyes of her sleepy children.
“Starr, you and Leo look exhausted. I think it’s time for bed,” said Tea getting up and lifting Starr to her feet. Todd got up and they all walked to Starr’s bedroom.
Starr climbed into bed and Todd and Tea kissed her goodnight as she smiled up at them and closed her eyes. They walked with Leo and placed him in his crib. This time he didn’t cry, but laid there for a few minutes as they watched him before his heavy lids finally closed and he went to sleep. Tea grabbed his monitor and she and Todd walked back to their bedroom hand in hand.
As Todd closed their door, Tea went and sat at the foot of their bed, leaning her back against the post. Todd noticed she had become pensive and quiet as she stared at the diamond ring in the palm of her hand, the ring she had not put on her finger yet. He walked over and sat beside her.
“You don’t like it? I mean you can take it back...if it’s not what you want, you know...I won’t mind.”
Tea looked up at him.
“The ring is beautiful, Todd. But....”
“But what....”
“Are you asking me to marry you because that’s what you want, or because you want to give Starr and Leo a family...as I recall you wanted to marry Blair for that same reason.”
Todd looked up with surprise, but he understood her meaning and took her hands in his.
“The truth? Yeah...I asked you for them, not for me. That ring...the whole institution of marriage thing...I could give a flying fuck about those things, Tea! You’re already my wife....and I’m already your husband and a thousand churches and a million courthouses couldn’t make it anymore legitimate or meaningful to me. Rings, licenses, ceremonies, maybe other people need that bullshit...but I don’t. Everything I have is yours....everything I am is yours. My heart...my soul...my body...they all belong to you. I belong to you...isn‘t that what marriage truly is?”
Tea reached out and touched his lips, wanting to feel the place where those beautiful words came out of. She nodded her head.
“Yes...I know, amor. It’s the same for me. I’m a lawyer and I believe in the system and defend it proudly...but it has so little to do with this...with us. We’ll have a wedding for our children and our families, but my soul is already united to yours, my husband. I could never feel more married to you than I do at this moment. And my heart and by soul and my body...they belong to you. I belong to you.”
Todd touched his wife’s face and looking down at her palm, picked up the ring and began sliding it up the finger of her left hand. Getting up and pulling her to her feet , they stood there together--she in her white gown, he in his dark clothing-- facing each other like a shy bride and groom. As his arm slid gently behind her back to draw her closer, her hands slipped around his neck and he brought his face very close, his forehead resting against hers, their bodies shaking with the anticipation of connection and matrimony.
“I love you,” he whispered simply.
“I love you,” she whispered back.
And they kissed slowly, deeply, sealing their union forever.
When they parted, they were both smiling, their eyes glistened with unshed tears. Tea looked up at him and noticed the gray shadows beneath his eyes.
“When was the last time you slept, querido?”
“A couple of days ago...I think.”
She walked over to the wall and dimmed the lights to a soft glow and bending down, she removed his shoes and then, taking her husband’s hand, she lead him to their marriage bed. Laying down softly, she pulled him down beside her and snuggled into his warm and clumsy embrace, smelling his dark, spicy scent and feeling his tight muscles relaxing against her as he let his exhaustion overtake him--allowing himself to be weak and vulnerable in her arms.
Todd heard Tea’s soft, shallow breathing against his chest as her warm body pressed closer to him and she drifted off to sleep. Sleep. Dreamy, peaceful sleep. That once illusive function he could never master or comprehend. His soul’s love was asleep in his arms and his children were in dreamland down the hall. His whole house was in a state of peaceful slumber except for him--he was fighting it. But he wasn’t fighting it out of the fear of waking up from some nightmare that would tear him apart, and he wasn’t fighting it because he was terrified of seeing his father’s face when he closed his eyes, he was fighting sleep because he wanted to savor this new and strange feeling inside him. He was happy. Despite his abused and abusive nature, despite his profound personal suffering, and despite the heavy and omnipresent remorse from the agonizing pain he’d inflicted on others, he was happy. Despite his refusal to believe in the abstract concepts of love and happiness...he was indeed happy.
Todd Manning smiled broadly in the dim light of his bedroom.
“Fuck, man...I’m happy,” he whispered to himself, laughing softly, shaking his head.
Tomorrow when he and Tea woke up, they would start their life together and he knew it would be rough, but that’s how they both liked it. They were each of too fiery and passionate a disposition to live any other way--he loving to instigate, she loving to provoke--but this thing between them, this love that bound them would always prevail and see them through the worst of times. He trusted this love.
Todd Manning closed his eyes and finally fell asleep with a bemused, little smile on his face.
THE END
2002 Copyright by Trog
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