The Florencia Lozano Homepage - Fan Fiction
| REACHING OUT BY TIMA |
CHAPTER 6 |
PREVIOUSLY:
Todd: And, you did find someone, right? I bet he was a great guy, not at all like that last loser you got hooked up with. Maybe someday, when your heart heals, you'll find the perfect guy for you. You know there are tons of guys out there that want someone just like you, that want the whole thing...house, kids, settling down...
Tea: All but the one man I really wanted that with.
[Todd searches her eyes, trying to figure out if she means what he thinks she means.]
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chapter 6:
[Several uncomfortable minutes pass silently.]
Tea: I should explain.
Todd: You don't owe me any explanations.
Tea: I feel like I do. There was someone.
Todd (standing up): I don't need the details, okay?
Tea: I think you're misunderstanding.
Todd: You didn't jump right into another relationship?
Tea: Maybe you're not misunderstanding.
Todd: Great! That's just great! So, you screw me, screw me over, and then go out and start screwing another guy the next day?
Tea: It wasn't the next day. I did wait. I waited several months before...
[Tea looks away, not wanting to hurt Todd.]
Todd: What were you waiting for? You should have jumped into the sack with loverboy the day you met him. Or, maybe you did.
Tea: Let's not talk about this anymore.
Todd: Why not?
Tea: I don't want to hurt you.
Todd: Since when?
[They both avoid eye contact for several moments.]
Todd: You waited several months?
Tea: Yes.
Todd: Why? What were you waiting for?
Tea: For you. For me.
Todd: You're not making any sense.
Tea: Maybe we really shouldn't talk about this.
Todd: Great. We'll just pretend it never happened.
Tea: I don't want to.
Todd: You loved him that much, huh?
Tea: No...yes...it's complicated.
[Todd returns to sitting on the bench next to Tea's wheelchair.]
Tea: After our relationship ended, I didn't seek another relationship out, or maybe I did, but not really.
Todd: You got any spare pain killers on you, because I think that's the only way I'll survive this conversation.
Tea: It wasn't really... I mean, I didn't really... It wasn't like...
Todd: Well, now everything's clear. Thanks for being so straight with me.
Tea (smiling): Can you do better? Can you explain your relationship with Blair?
Todd: Only if you get me those drugs.
Tea: Maybe none of that has to matter right now.
Todd: It matters to me.
Tea: Because I matter to you?
[Todd looks down, not wanting to look in her eyes right now. Tea's hand shakes as it reaches out and touches Todd's chin, bringing his face up so she can see his eyes again.
Todd can feel himself melting at her touch. He tries to hide it. He tries to prevent his eyes from showing how much he still cares about her.]
Tea: You matter to me, Todd Manning.
[Tea lets go of his chin and looks down for a moment before quickly looking back at his gaze again, a determined look on her face.]
Tea: I'll try to explain it to you.
Todd: We've been out here for a while. You look exhausted. Actually, you've looked exhausted this whole time.
Tea: I have trouble sleeping. I have nightmares.
Todd: I thought I recognized that look in your eyes. I've seen it enough times in the mirror to know what it means. So, that...uh...accident...it plays over and over in your head, right?
Tea: Yes. I don't even have to be asleep.
Todd: But, you're scared to sleep. You're scared of how your dreams will torture you if you let them have complete control over your mind.
[Tea lowers her gaze again. She feels comfort in Todd's presence but also vulnerability that she doesn't feel with the strangers she's met, and been surrounded by, since the plane crash. With everyone else she's had contact with, it was easier. She saw pity in their eyes, but with Todd she sees understanding, and maybe affection. Right now, feeling anything hurts too much. She doesn't want to trust him again and have her heart broken yet again.
Todd stands up and moves behind her wheelchair.]
Todd: Come on. Let's go back to your room. I'll hold your hand while you sleep.
Tea (extremely touched): Todd... You don't have to.
Todd: Yeah, I do. You've held my hand so I could sleep. I owe you. And, I hate owing people. So, let me pay this debt so I don't have to owe you anymore. Okay?
Tea: Okay.
[Todd walks behind Tea, pushing her wheelchair toward her room.
More than an hour later...
Todd returns to the rehabilitation clinic after quickly going to his hotel and changing his clothes. With him he has brought a large amount of food that he bought at the restaurant in his hotel.
As he enters Tea's room, he finds her in bed, looking out the small window that offers her the only distraction from her otherwise bland room.]
Todd: You should do some decorating, if you're going to be here for a while.
[Tea quickly turns her head in his direction, startled by the sound of his voice.]
Todd: You thought I wouldn't come back?
Tea: You do have a history of that.
Todd: I need somebody to help me eat all this junk.
Tea: I'm not really very hungry, but you go ahead.
Todd: You have to help me out with what some of this stuff is and how I'm supposed to eat it.
Tea: You know, there are many fast food restaurants here that are the same as the ones you have back home.
Todd: I thought you might like some of this local stuff.
Tea: I'm really not hungry.
Todd: You have to eat.
Tea: I'm fine.
Todd: I'll keep bugging you until you at least eat some of this stuff so you might as well dig in.
[Todd pulls out two fancy plates and two fancy glasses and sets up their meal. Tea waits until he finishes and settles himself in the chair by her bed before speaking again.]
Tea: No candles?
Todd: They confiscated them. Something about a fire hazard, or something stupid like that. You don't know the trouble I went through just getting this food in here. You better appreciate it.
Tea: It's very sweet, Todd. I just don't think I could handle it.
Todd: They said you can eat this kind of stuff.
Tea: You asked?
Todd: Well, I didn't want you puking because of me. Come on, just try it. I'm willing to risk my stomach. I don't think I should be the only one.
Tea: I'll try.
[Tea pokes at her food, only taking a small amount into her mouth, while Todd devours his. He doesn't explain to Tea that he was so worried about her that he hasn't eaten since he heard that she had been hurt. He isn't certain yet if he should reveal how much she truly means to him.
Minutes later...
As Todd finishes the food on his plate, he notices that Tea has barely eaten anything.]
Todd: You want dessert instead?
Tea: There's more?
Todd: Of course. I wouldn't leave out the best part of the meal.
Tea: I can't eat any more. I'm full.
Todd: You hardly ate anything. You've mostly just pushed everything from one side of the plate to the other.
Tea: I'm just not hungry.
Todd: Do you think they'd want you to do this?
Tea: Who?
Todd: Your grandmother and the love of your life.
Tea: He wasn't...
[Tea stops speaking, her guilt again gripping her.]
Todd: Do you feel lousy because you didn't love him as much as he loved you?
Tea: He did love me. He was a very sweet man. Was... It doesn't feel right talking about them like...
Todd: Like, they died?
[Tea turns her head away. She doesn't want to cry in front of Todd right now.]
Todd: It's not your fault the plane went down, is it?
[Todd pauses, but Tea doesn't respond.]
Todd: Well? Did you cause that plane to crash? Are you the reason all those people died? Are you the reason all those other people got hurt? Are you?
[Tea turns her head back and looks at Todd with anger in her eyes.]
Tea: It was my fault. Are you satisfied now? Leave! Right now!
Todd: You didn't make that plane crash.
Tea: It was my idea to come here. It was because of me that they were on that flight. I wanted to bring my grandmother here. I wanted to...
[Tea wipes at her eyes with the cloth napkin in her hand.]
Todd: And, your...whatever...he came along to learn more about where your family came from?
Tea: No. He was born here.
Todd: So, you had stuff in common?
Tea: Yes.
Todd: A lot of stuff?
Tea: Yes.
Todd: Like what?
Tea: Do you really want to know this?
Todd: No. But, you really need to tell someone. I'm someone. Tell me.
[Tea looks away again for several moments. She hasn't spoken to anyone, at any great length, about this since the plane crash. As she looks back at Todd, she prepares to fill him in on as much as she can, knowing that it's time for her to finally share with someone the guilt that she feels and knowing that Todd is the only person she would really feel comfortable talking with about this.]
Tea: Del was here. He took care of everything with our grandmother. He didn't say anything but I felt like the whole time he was blaming me.
Todd: You just imagined that. Your brother likes you too much to dump on you like that.
Tea: I feel responsible, because I am responsible. It was my idea to bring my grandmother here. She was so happy showing me the places that had meaning to her when she was younger. She showed me where she went to school, and where she met my grandfather, and where they married, and...
Todd: And, your boyfriend was with you both the whole time? Like a part of the family, right? Like I never was?
Tea: You were a part of my family, Todd.
Todd: Not as far as the rest of your family was ever concerned. Except, Roseanne, when she needed something.
Tea: Has my niece been bothering you?
Todd: It doesn't matter. Tell me what else you did.
Tea: We ate a lot, walked a lot, talked a lot.
Todd: So, you had a good time?
Tea: Yes.
Todd: Your grandmother liked your boyfriend, didn't she?
Tea (smiling): She adored him.
[Todd looks away. Tea isn't certain, but she thinks that he may be jealous, not just of her relationship with this other man, but also of her grandmother's affection for him.]
Tea: She never really had a chance to know you, Todd.
Todd: What she did know she didn't like so she didn't want to know anything more. I guess this guy was something special, huh?
Tea: He was special. I cared for him, as much as I could. But, it was never enough. It was never as much as he wanted me to. We did have a lot in common with our careers, our backgrounds, our language. But, there was something missing, at least for me. There was a night that my grandmother insisted that we not spend with her. So, we went for a walk and found a quiet place...very romantic. It should have been romantic, anyway. He told me then that he knew why I was unable to advance our relationship the way that he wanted to. He said that it was impossible for me to give my heart to him because it wasn't available, it still belonged to you.
[Todd had been looking down, staring at the tile on the floor. Suddenly, his head rises until he's gazing into her eyes again.]
Tea: Go home, Todd. Be with your family, with the people that you love. Time is precious. Love is precious. Don't run from it just because it's difficult. Don't use me to hide from what you're feeling. Allow yourself to have happiness. That's what I want for you.
[Tea leans her head back and closes her eyes as tears spill down her cheeks.
Todd watches her for a moment before slowly standing up. He moves the cart, that holds the remains of their meal, out of the way.
He looks at her for another moment, more certain about what he has to do next than he ever has been before.
Moments later, his lips lightly touch hers for a brief moment before his head moves to the side of her head and his upper body presses lightly against hers. He's afraid to grab her and pull her into him the way that he wants to, still not knowing all he needs to know about her injuries, but he knows that he needs to hold her right now and he knows that she needs to be held, not by just anyone, but by him, the man who still possesses her heart, just as she still possesses his.]
to be continued...
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