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| ANOTHER JOURNEY BY TIMA |
CHAPTERS 161 - 165 |
PREVIOUSLY...
Tea: You're drunk, Todd.
Todd: Yeah, I am.
Tea: You're admitting it?
Todd: If it will get you to touch him, I'll admit to anything.
Tea: Not like this, Todd.
Todd: Then tell me how. Tell me what I have to do to get into your pants tonight.
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chapter 161
[Tea tries to keep her gaze on Todd's face but can't help but look down at his penis in his hand, especially when she realizes that he's slowly stroking it.]
Tea: You are not getting into my pants tonight. We are not having sex.
Todd: Because you're scared of my buddy here, right?
Tea: I'm not scared of your...your...
Todd: Penis...dick...cock... I thought you were into spelling things out even if the words make one of us uncomfortable.
Tea: It's late. Put on some underwear and change your shirt so we can go to bed.
Todd: If you weren't scared, you'd prove it to me.
Tea: We are not having sex so I can prove to you that I am not afraid to have sex with you.
Todd: Why not?
Tea: Because this is the wrong time.
Todd: That's garbage.
Tea: Todd, when we make love, that's what I want to be doing. I don't want it to be something that we rush through. I don't want it to be something that one of us won't remember.
Todd: I'll remember. Believe me, I'll remember.
Tea: I don't want to wake up the next day, look into your eyes and see regret.
Todd: Why not? That's what I'll see in your eyes the morning after.
Tea: You won't, Todd. I'm not afraid and I wouldn't regret it.
Todd: Then why won't you let it happen?
Tea: Because...I want it to be special.
Todd: Who are you going to have playing my role?
Tea: You, Todd. I want to be with you. I want to experience that with you.
Todd: You're scared. You're just hiding from the truth.
Tea: This isn't getting us anywhere. Let's go to sleep. Tomorrow you won't have any interest in having sex with me again, and everything will be back to normal...for us, anyway.
Todd: What about your being knocked up? You are knocked up, right?
Tea: I don't know.
Todd: Were you lying earlier just to tick me off?
Tea: No.
Todd: I didn't think you were.
Tea: I am a little...late...but that doesn't mean...
Todd: Sure, it does.
Tea: These things aren't always perfect. Women can be late without being pregnant.
Todd: You've been late before?
Tea: Yes.
Todd: How late?
Tea: A few days.
Todd: So, you might have it tomorrow?
Tea: It's possible.
Todd: Do you feel different?
Tea: No. My body feels the same.
[They're both silent for several moments. Tea sneaks another glance at Todd's penis as he turns his head and looks away from her. He has stopped stroking himself but he still isn't making any attempt to cover himself, either.]
Todd: Delgado?
Tea: Yes?
Todd: There are a bunch of mirrors on the wall. I can see you looking at me. I can see exactly which part of me you're looking at.
Tea: I guess you caught me.
Todd: Do you want to touch him now?
Tea: Todd...
Todd: I'm not asking for me, I'm asking for him.
Tea: Really?
Todd: He's kind of shy and he doesn't show himself to just anyone. Here he is out in the open...exposed...vulnerable...
Tea: And, he would feel better if I touched him?
Todd: He likes you.
[The sound in Todd's voice touches Tea. She doesn't feel that this is just a drunken guy looking for sexual satisfaction in this moment. She believes that he certainly is that, too, but she senses that there's more to Todd's needing her to touch him than just sexual gratification.]
Tea: Ask me tomorrow, Todd, when you're sober. You'll get a different answer.
Todd: It's okay that you're scared to be with him. He's scared to be with you.
Tea: Why?
Todd: He doesn't want to hurt you.
Tea: He wouldn't...you wouldn't, Todd. Making love to me won't hurt me.
Todd: Yeah, it will.
Tea: No...
Todd: It will, Tea, trust me. If it ever happens, I'll do everything I can to keep it from hurting you physically. I'll go slow, I'll be careful, but you're going to hurt like hell, Tea. That's not a threat. That's the truth. You'll hurt. Sex...maybe that hurts you...maybe it doesn't. I don't know. But, making love, that will definitely hurt you. Love hurts. I won't be able to stop it from hurting you.
[Tea sits down next to him and is quiet for several moments. Todd takes off his beer soaked shirt and turns toward her, placing his arm across her stomach as he encourages her to lie down next to him.]
Todd: It's gonna hurt, Tea.
Tea: I know.
Todd: I hate that. I don't want to hurt you.
Tea: You wouldn't be...not in a bad way.
Todd: Hurt is hurt.
Tea: It's not the same thing.
Todd: I'll see it in your eyes. I hate it when your eyes look like that. They should look happy. If I leave you, I hurt you. If I stay I hurt you. This sucks. If you're pregnant, we're screwed. If you're not pregnant, we're screwed. Love is a trap because once you cross that line there's no escaping it. I tried to. It didn't work. I hate this, Delgado. I hate this.
[Todd curls up next to Tea and places his head on her chest. Her hand strokes his hair for several minutes while they silently lay together.]
Tea: Todd?
Todd: No more talk.
Tea: That's fine with me. You need to put some clothes on, though. If you don't, you'll be angry at me in the morning. It will be difficult enough tomorrow without adding to it.
Todd: Do you want out, Tea?
Tea: No.
Todd: You're sure? Even after tonight?
Tea: I'm sure. We need to talk about tonight, about the things that were said and done.
Todd: No, we don't. We'll pretend they never happened.
Tea: We can't do that, Todd. Pretending our problems will go away, won't make any of them go away.
[Todd pulls himself away from Tea's body and sits up. He begins to put on the clothing that Tea had laid out for him earlier.]
Todd: You're right. There's no way we can ignore that mini-R.J. growing inside you.
Tea: I'll get a pregnancy test tomorrow.
[Tea repositions herself so she's on her side of the bed and gets under the covers. Todd turns off all of the light in the room before lying down next to her.
For numerous minutes they both are silent, each lost in their own misery and pain.]
Tea: Todd?
[He doesn't respond.]
Tea: I'm sorry, Todd. I didn't want to break my promise to you by not telling you that my period was late, but I didn't want this to end. I kept hoping that maybe, this one time, things would work out. Maybe this would be the one time that we could figure out how to get it right. Maybe this would be the one time that there wouldn't be anyone, or anything, that kept us from what we both want...what we need. I need you. There have been times that I truly wished that I didn't. It would be so much easier if I didn't need you...if I didn't need your love. I don't regret giving up everything to come on this trip with you. It's only been a couple of weeks but these have been the best weeks of my life. Every moment of it hasn't been great, or easy, but I needed this. There have been so many moments that you've given me during this trip that I needed. You probably wish that we had never started this journey. But, I needed this. I'll never regret falling in love with you. I'll never stop loving you, no matter what happens tomorrow. I know that this is over, Todd. I know that we've traveled as far as we can together. I promise you, I will never regret having come this far with you. That's one promise that I absolutely know I will never break.
[Tea rolls over onto her side, facing away from Todd. He hasn't made any noise for a while now. Tea knows it's possible that he's asleep and hasn't heard anything that she just said to him. He may also be awake but perhaps doesn't want to respond, or doesn't know how. Maybe he wants to wait until tomorrow, until their final moment together, to have this kind of talk.
Tea feels better, though, having said it. Even if she'll have to say it all again tomorrow, she doesn't mind. In fact, she wants to say it again. She wants every chance she may have during what she's certain will be their final time together to tell him how she feels about him and how much she appreciates their time together.
Several minutes later, Tea is still lying awake, finding it difficult to force her mind to stop thinking about how tomorrow will play out. She's startled when Todd rolls over and brings his body against hers, draping his arm around her, holding her body close to his.
She waits, but Todd gives her no sign indicating whether he is awake or asleep.
After several minutes, Tea gives up trying to determine if he's holding her on purpose or not. With the comfort of his arm around her, she finally is able to fall asleep.
Todd soon falls asleep, too.]
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chapter 162:
[The next morning, Tea wakes up early. It's just beginning to get light out as Tea opens her eyes. She smiles at the feeling of Todd's body still pressed against her, his arm still holding her to him.
As she tries to remove herself from his grip to get up, she's surprised how tightly he can hold her in his sleep. At least she assumes that he must still be asleep. She feels certain that with the amount of alcohol he must have consumed the night before, when he awakens, she'll know about it.
Several times, Tea pulls his arm away from his body, only to have him place it again around her just as she's about to get out of bed. Finally, she's able to pull his arm away and slide out of bed before his arm returns to where it previously was, searching for her missing body.]
Todd: Delgado?
Tea: I'm right here. Go back to sleep.
[Todd opens his eyes and watches her as she walks toward the balcony, closing the curtains.]
Todd: It's not morning, is it?
Tea: I'm afraid so.
Todd: Hell! I was hoping I'd sleep a lot later than this. Not waking up until late in the afternoon would have been great.
Tea: Go ahead. Go back to sleep. I'll just get dressed and go into town quickly. I'll be back as soon as I can.
Todd: Why are you going into town?
Tea: I don't know how much you remember about last night.
Todd: I remember everything.
Tea: Do you?
Todd: Yeah...I think.
Tea: You must feel pretty horrible right now.
Todd: About the stuff I did and said?
Tea: Actually, I was referring to the heavy drinking you did last night.
Todd: Oh, that. It's no big deal. I've felt like this on a lot of mornings.
Tea: I could order you some toast before I go.
Todd: Yeah, sure, whatever. Do you have to go right now?
Tea: No. I just thought that it would be a good idea to get that out of the way as soon as possible. I'm sorry I lied to you and I'm sorry that I threw it in your face to hurt you, the way I did.
Todd: You didn't lie. You just didn't tell me. Don't look at me so funny. I've always been an understanding guy, haven't I?
Tea: In some ways...about some things...
Todd: Yeah, but I shouldn't be understanding about this, right? I should be angry and throwing things and scaring the hell out of you.
Tea: I think I like it this way better.
Todd: Then you better get me drunk every time you're going to put me through something like this so I'll feel like hell the next morning and not feel like yelling at you.
Tea: I'll keep that in mind. I'm going to go get ready. Get some more sleep. You'll feel better later.
[Tea takes some clean clothing into the bathroom. When she returns to the bedroom, she finds Todd sitting up on the side of the bed. Even in the dim light she can tell that he looks horrible.]
Tea: I thought you were going back to sleep.
Todd: I tried but someone was making a lot of noise.
Tea: I tried to be quiet.
Todd: There's no such thing as quiet right now.
Tea: I'll order some aspirin to go with your toast.
[Tea goes into the other room to call room service. Todd goes into the bathroom. He takes a hot shower that consists entirely of him standing completely still with the water hitting his head and sliding down his naked body. He doesn't feel up to any movement required for actually washing himself.
When he exits the bathroom more than twenty minutes later, he finds himself alone in their suite. A tray with toast, aspirin and juice is on the nightstand, along with a note from Tea saying that she'll be back shortly.
Todd tries nibbling at the toast but can't bring himself to eat much. He thinks about Tea and what she went to purchase...a pregnancy test. He knows that today could be the day that he has to finally decide what to do if Tea is pregnant. He knows that the obvious answer is to leave, let her go, let her have a chance at the life that she deserves. He hates the idea of going back to being miserable without her, though. If he stayed, though, he'd probably still be miserable and he'd just make Tea and her kid miserable, too. He knows what it's like to grow up feeling hated and unwanted. He could try, for Tea's sake, to accept her child. It would be a part of her, after all, and he does love her...but, the child would also be R.J.'s and he hates his guts for what he did with Tea. It would be hard not to show that hatred to their kid.
Todd is lying on the bed, still thinking through the impossible situation when Tea returns. She quietly enters the bedroom, uncertain if he's awake and finds him lying with his head flat on the bed and a wash cloth covering his eyes.]
Tea: Todd?
Todd: Yeah?
Tea: I wasn't sure if you were awake. Did you take the aspirin?
Todd: Yeah. It hasn't kicked in yet and there's too damn much light in this place. I think it's all the mirrors.
Tea: I'm sure you'll feel better soon. We'll have an answer soon, too.
[Tea goes into the bathroom and closes the door. Todd sits up. He knows what Tea's doing in the bathroom. He knows that everything is about to change. He stands up and begins pacing. He feels miserable and shouldn't be moving around but he can't stay still right now.
Several minutes later, Tea returns to the bedroom.]
Todd: Well?
Tea: I took it.
Todd: Are you?
Tea: I don't know yet. We have to wait for the results.
Todd: So, you thought you'd come out here and be miserable with me?
Tea: Basically. Are you okay with that?
Todd: Well, it's not really a new experience, is it? You've been miserable with me lots of times before.
Tea: I prefer to think about all of the times that I've been happy with you.
Todd: That probably doesn't take you very long since that's only happened three, maybe four, times.
Tea: I've been happy with you a lot, Todd.
Todd: Whatever.
[Tea has been looking at her watch throughout their conversation. Finally, as their wait comes to an end, she looks at him and smiles slightly, trying to reassure him, and herself, that somehow this will be okay.
Tea turns to return to the bathroom. She's almost to the door before Todd calls out to her.]
Todd: Don't do it.
Tea: What?
Todd: Don't go in there.
Tea: I have to if we're going to know the results.
Todd: Just give me a minute to think, okay?
[Todd approaches her. He's nervous. He doesn't know what he's doing. He had an opportunity to get out. He knows the smart thing to do would be to take it. He should let this end, here and now, instead of prolonging his own misery, and hers, deluding themselves any longer that this relationship, that love, could possibly work out.]
Tea: Todd, I have to go in there now. I can't wait any longer. The instructions say that if you wait too long, the results may not be accurate.
Todd: Screw the results.
Tea: What?
Todd: Let's not know.
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chapter 163:
Tea: Todd...
Todd: I mean it, Tea. I've been thinking about it and I think we're being really unfair to your body right now.
Tea: You're not making any sense.
Todd: Look, we had a deal, right? We'd stick with this until your body, you know, did the thing your body's supposed to do.
Tea: But, it didn't.
Todd: We haven't given it enough of a chance yet. It could still come through for us.
Tea: Todd, if I'm not pregnant, we'll find that out now. If I am...
Todd: If you are, I think this is over, Tea.
Tea: We always knew that.
Todd: Yeah...I guess.
Tea: Was there another option? Were you considering...
Todd: I've thought about this a lot. And, there's a part of me that is really screwed up and thinking, what the hell, let's do this, let's be together, no matter what.
Tea (touched): Todd...
Todd: Tea, I hate the idea of going back to the way things were when we were apart. You annoy the hell out of me, you irritate me, you tick me off... I don't want to give that up.
[Tea smiles, amazed that Todd can make her feel loved with such un-romantic words.]
Todd: If it was just you and me, we could put ourselves through hell together, but there'd be a kid, Tea...a kid that isn't mine...a kid that you had in a way that I'm not okay with you having one. I know that you love Starr. I know that it doesn't matter to you that I had her with someone else. That's different, though.
Tea: You had her before we even knew each other.
Todd: Exactly. If this were different, maybe... I don't know. I think I'd still be feeling a lot of the same stuff. Last night...
Tea: Let's stay on this topic, for now. We'll talk about last night later, okay?
Todd: No. Last night, it happened.
Tea: What happened?
Todd: I was my father. I was that sick bastard. I wanted to hurt you. I wanted to make you pay for what you had done. Tell me the truth, Tea. Did you flirt with that guy?
Tea: What guy?
Todd: Any of them. The waiter, or those jerks at the bar...were you coming on to any of them? Did you want to screw any of them?
Tea: No, of course not.
Todd: Maybe it's obvious to you but it isn't to me. What was obvious to me last night was that you were playing games with me. You were using your body against me, to have control over me. I couldn't let you have control. I had to be the one who was in control. I think I knew that you weren't doing anything, that you weren't flirting, but that thing inside of me was just screaming at me. I grew up watching that bastard. I saw the way he treated everyone around him. I swore that I'd never be like him. I'd never treat my wife the way he treated his wife. I'd never treat my kids the way he treated me.
Tea: You haven't. You never hurt Starr the way that he hurt you.
Todd: Yeah, but I've become him. I am him. I was him last night. I saw what he did to my mom. I saw what it did to her. I saw what she lost because of him, what he took from her. She was so out of it before she left...from the booze...from his wearing her down. It got to the point where she was just like a zombie sometimes. He would tell her what to do and she would just do it, going through the motions, not caring what she was doing, no longer really feeling anything. I think that maybe she figured out how to go away in her head, just like I did. I would see her after he finished with her. In the beginning she tried to hide a lot of it from me. At the end, though, she didn't care anymore. After a while, I think the thrill for him was gone, because the thrill had come from hurting her, or humiliating her. When he had finally broken her to the point where she was just that zombie, I think he still got off on hurting her. Not in the same way, though. The thrill became more about seeing that she was in fact gone. Her body was there but her spirit, or whatever you want to call it, wasn't there anymore. But, that thrill wasn't enough for him so he'd leave after he finished with her. He'd force her to have sex with him, not by threatening her anymore, because she did whatever she was told, but she didn't want to be with him and he knew it, but he'd do it anyway, just to know that he could, that he could do whatever he wanted to do to her and she was so far gone, she wouldn't fight him at all. He'd make her say stuff to him. I'd hear all of it. She'd repeat whatever he told her to say, but you could tell that she wasn't even paying attention to the words. He'd take off after he finished with her, probably looking for more of a thrill. He probably went and picked up some girl at a bar who had no idea what was gonna happen to her, and he'd get the bigger thrills he needed from her. I would wait until I heard his car leave and then I'd go and check on her. I'd make sure that she was breathing, make sure that he hadn't killed her. I'd take care of her burns, and cuts, and bruises. I told you last night about learning about girls bleeding, right?
Tea: You mentioned it, but not the details.
Todd: One time I was taking care of her, and bandaging her, and she was bleeding...down there. I didn't know what to do. I was a little kid. I didn't know that girls bleed. They had a private bathroom. I never saw her girl stuff. I saw blood and I didn't know what to do. I didn't think I should use the same bandages I used on the rest of her body. I couldn't ask her what to do because she was so out of it. If I told her to move her arm, she'd move her arm. If I had told her to repeat something I said, she would have repeated it. But, if I asked what to do about her bleeding down there, she couldn't answer me.
[Todd looks away. Tea feels horrible for him, for the little boy who saw too much and still hates himself for not doing enough to help his mother.]
Tea: Todd, it's okay. We don't have to talk about this anymore.
Todd: I didn't know what to do, Tea.
Tea: I know.
[Tea takes a chance and slowly approaches him. She gently touches his back. He jerks away initially and then stands still, allowing her to touch him, to try to comfort him, even though it's not truly possible in this moment.]
Tea: Little boys aren't supposed to know what to do about that. You should never have been in that situation. That should never have been your job, Todd.
Todd: Someone had to do it.
Tea: No. Your father had to stop hurting your mother. That's what had to happen. That's what should have happened.
Todd: He did stop. She got out. She had to leave me behind to do it, but she got out.
[Todd turns toward Tea again, seeking out her eyes.]
Todd: If you are pregnant, you wouldn't want to be with me anymore.
Tea: Yes, I would. Nothing would ever stop me from wanting that.
Todd: If you are, when you hold your kid in your arms, when you look at your kid's face, when it hits you how helpless this tiny person is, when you realize that it's your job to make sure that nothing bad ever happens to this kid, then you'll know that not being with me is the right thing. I would try for you, but I'd probably fail. And, I know what it's like to grow up living with someone who hates you, who hates the very fact that you exist. I wouldn't do it on purpose. I would try. But, you don't want to risk screwing your kid up by having me around. Trust me on that. You don't want your kid growing up like I did.
Tea: Todd...
Todd: You know I'm right, Tea.
Tea: I wish you weren't.
[They both sit down on the end of the bed, allowing silent acceptance to wash over them.]
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chapter 164:
Tea: We could make a deal like in one of those old, sappy movie.
Todd: Huh?
Tea: We could agree to meet again in twenty years. We agree on a place and a date, and if we're both available in twenty years, we meet again and see what happens.
Todd: Twenty years, huh? We won't be too old or decrepit by then, I guess.
Tea: So, we agree?
Todd: No.
[Tea is disappointed for a moment, until Todd turns toward her and lightly touches the hair by the side of her face, moving it out of the way.]
Todd: Nineteen years. The kid would be an adult, probably in college. Unless, you have other kids by then. If you do, we'd have to wait even longer.
Tea: Would you? I'm not saying that I want you to, well, I do want you to, but I don't, but would you?
Todd: Delgado, my brain isn't up to trying to decipher whatever the hell you just said.
Tea: I meant that I don't like the idea of you being with anyone else any more than you like the idea of me being with anyone else. I don't want you to spend so many years alone, though. I want you to be happy and feel loved.
Todd: We could get it on in secret. Sneak around. Meet for a few days, several times a year.
Tea: R.J. probably would want partial custody. I would have some time to myself.
Todd: It would never work, though.
Tea: Probably not. Besides, we don't even know if I am pregnant. We're assuming.
Todd: It's too late to look at that test you took, right?
Tea: I think so. Whatever it might say may, or may not, be accurate at this point.
Todd: Good.
Tea: Good?
Todd: We're going with plan B.
Tea: Which is?
Todd: We hit the road again.
Tea: Running from it won't change anything.
Todd: We won't be running, we'll be driving.
Tea: For how long?
Todd: Four days.
Tea: Why four days?
Todd: Why not? You said last night that it was two days late, right? That makes today the third day. We should give your body at least a week to come through for us before we give up on it and turn to technology for the answer. So, four more days? Five, if you count today.
Tea: Okay. More days with you would be great. And, who knows, maybe my body will surprise both of us and give us a chance at a lifetime together.
Todd: Let's not go crazy. Your girl thing happening isn't going to stop either of us from screwing this up some other way.
Tea: True. But, it would give us another chance. One that I want.
Todd: I must still have a lot of booze me.
Tea: Why?
Todd: I'm sitting here, putting up with all this talk.
Tea: Fine. We'll stop talking. You'll be sleeping again soon, anyway.
Todd: I thought we were hitting the road again?
Tea: We are, but I'm driving.
Todd: No, you're not.
Tea: Todd, you're in no shape...
Todd: I'm still a better driver than you are.
Tea: I disagree.
Todd: You always do.
Tea: Here's the plan...
Todd: I'm the guy, I make the plans.
Tea: Could you just give me a chance?
Todd: Fine. Go ahead.
Tea: I think we should...
Todd: Forget it. That's a stupid idea. We're doing my idea.
Tea: You didn't even hear mine.
Todd: I didn't have to, I know mine's better.
Tea: And, what exactly is your plan?
Todd: Give me a minute.
Tea: That's what I thought. We're doing this my way.
Todd: It's my car.
Tea: It's our car...at least for the next four days, five if you count today. I'll get our things out of the bathroom and then we're leaving.
[Tea stands up and approaches the bathroom.]
Todd: Wait! Don't go in there.
Tea: Do you need to use the bathroom? Do you feel sick?
[Todd stands up and approaches her.]
Todd: If I did, I'd be going out on the balcony. There are probably people down below now and I could at least get some fun out of feeling this lousy. Unless, it's illegal to vomit on people, around here.
Tea: I thought you enjoyed breaking the law?
Todd: I do. But, I have a reason to keep my butt out of jail...at least for the next four days. Five, if you count today.
Tea: Good. I'm glad. I want you to keep your butt...
[Tea is tempted to put her arms around him and place her hands on his butt, but stops herself, uncertain how he would respond in this moment.]
Todd: You want me to keep my butt? That's a weird thing to say. I wasn't planning on giving it away.
Tea: I was going to say more, in fact, I was going to do more, but I wasn't sure if I should.
Todd: Go for it.
Tea: You're sure?
[Todd looks at her with as much sensuality as he can muster in his current state.]
Todd: You know I feel like hell, right?
Tea: That's pretty obvious.
Todd: So, you know how much hell I would have to put myself through to brush my teeth. Any movement right now is hell. But, I would go through hell for you, Tea. I think I should be rewarded for that.
Tea: You brushed your teeth?
Todd: Just for you. I didn't want you kissing any stale puke breath.
Tea: That was very thoughtful.
Todd: So, go for it, Tea.
Tea: You're sure?
Todd: If you don't want to do that kind of stuff with me anymore...
Tea: No. I do. I do, Todd. I do.
Todd: Are you practicing for our next wedding?
Tea: Is that a proposal?
Todd: Not unless you're on your knees asking.
Tea: I'm tempted.
Todd: Really? Are you drunk?
Tea: Of course not.
Todd: That's the only reason that would make any sense, unless you need money.
Tea: I don't need your money. I don't want your money.
Todd: What do you want, Tea?
[Tea brings her hand to his face and touches his cheek tenderly.]
Tea: If I could have whatever I wanted, I would want...
Todd: A sports car?
Tea: No.
Todd: A trip around the world?
Tea: No.
Todd: Jewelry?
Tea: No.
Todd: French toast?
Tea: French toast?
Todd: That's what I want for dinner. I feel too lousy to enjoy it now but I really want French toast.
Tea: Why?
Todd: I don't know. I just want it.
Tea: If we can find a place to stay tonight that has a kitchen, I'll make you French toast tonight.
Todd: You don't have to. We'll just go to one of those places that serves breakfast all the time.
Tea: I want to cook for you.
Todd: You're still mad at me about last night?
Tea: Is my cooking that bad?
Todd: Well...
Tea: You seemed to survive the last time I cooked. Do you remember the last time?
Todd: Hot tub...you showing me yours...
Tea: I could show you again tonight.
Todd: Are you planning to cook without your clothes on?
Tea: Is that the only way my cooking would be bearable for you?
Todd: I wouldn't want you to cook like that.
Tea: It would make dinner less appealing?
Todd: Yeah, actually it would. I wouldn't care about the food. I'd be too distracted.
Tea: Well, I prefer to be dressed when I cook anyway. I don't want to chance burning certain body parts.
Todd: I don't want you to hurt, Tea. If you think you will, you should leave me.
Tea: Leaving you right now would hurt, Todd.
Todd: Yeah?
Tea: Yeah.
Todd: So...we agree that you'll wait to get naked until after dinner, when we both can enjoy it?
Tea: I'll agree to consider wearing less attire at some point during our evening. Will you agree to let me drive today so you can get some more sleep?
Todd: You want me to just close my eyes and trust you like that?
Tea: Can you?
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chapter 165:
Todd: Can I trust you?
Tea: Can you?
Todd: Do you trust me?
Tea: Yes.
Todd: You answered that too fast. It must be a trick.
Tea: I'm not tricking you.
Todd: Why aren't you ticked about last night?
Tea: Let's wait until later to talk about last night, okay?
Todd: You want to wait to talk? You? Tea Delgado? You want to wait to talk?
Tea: Manning.
Todd: What?
Tea: My name is Tea...Delgado...Manning.
Todd: I thought you got rid of the Manning part?
Tea: It's possible that I may have forgotten to change my name officially.
Todd: Really?
Tea: It's a hassle. There's paperwork involved.
Todd: Yeah, lawyers hate paperwork.
Tea: So, should we decide together where we're going next or do you want me to surprise you?
Todd: If I left it up to you, Manning, I'd probably wake up in some girl place.
Tea: You're calling me Manning now?
Todd: That's your name, isn't it?
Tea: I like it when you call me Delgado.
Todd: You don't think it's too impersonal?
Tea: Not the way you say it.
Todd: How do I say it?
[Tea tenderly places her hand on his cheek.]
Tea: Very sweetly.
Todd: You had to go and ruin the mood, didn't you, Del...deliberately...you had to ruin it deliberately.
Tea: Say my name, Todd.
Todd: Why? You'll just insult me again.
Tea: I'll kiss you.
Todd: So, if I don't say your name...?
Tea: I'll still kiss you.
Todd: Delgado...
[Tea leans in to kiss him. He steps back to stop her.]
Todd: Wait, that was an accident.
Tea: You don't want me to kiss you?
Todd: Of course I do. I'm a guy.
Tea: Well, then stand still and pucker up, Mr. Manning.
Todd: Seriously, Tea, you really want to kiss me?
Tea: Yes.
Todd: Even after everything that happened last night?
Tea: Yes.
[Todd shakes his head, not understanding.]
Tea: Todd, I'm not okay with everything that happened last night. I'm not okay with the way that you treated me during parts of the evening. I'm not okay with you purposely trying to inflict emotional pain on me because you're upset, or jealous.
Todd: So, you don't want to kiss me ever again?
Tea: I definitely want to kiss you.
Todd: You need a shrink referral?
Tea: That's something else that we should talk about, Todd.
Todd: What is?
Tea: Last night, you told me...
Todd: Told you what?
Tea: Do you remember?
Todd: Remember what?
Tea: You told me that you're seeing a shrink.
Todd: Yeah, so?
Tea: You remember that?
Todd: I remember everything, Tea. Unfortunately, no blackouts occurred.
Tea: Good.
Todd: You may have had fun last night, but for me...
[Todd steps away from her, the mood getting too serious for him right now.]
Tea: Todd, we agree that we have more time now, right? We don't have to talk about all of this right now. We could spread it out over the next several days, if we want to.
Todd: We could just ignore it all. That's an option.
Tea: Not a good one.
Todd: Maybe not for you.
Tea: I have some things to answer for, too.
Todd: Good. Let's focus on how screwed up you are.
Tea: Let's focus on getting our things packed up and getting back on the road.
Todd: We can't pack all of our things.
Tea: Why not?
Todd: Some of it's in the bathroom.
Tea: So?
Todd: That test you took is in there.
Tea: That's okay.
Todd: We agreed not to look at the results.
Tea: We don't have to.
Todd: We'd be tempted. If neither of us goes in there, we won't know what it says.
Tea: The results may not be accurate anyway since we've waited so long.
Todd: But, we would wonder. It would make it harder to wait. We're not going in there.
Tea: What about our things?
Todd: We don't have anything important in there. It's just clothes and toothbrushes and stuff like that. Think of this as another chance for you to do that shopping thing you love to do so much.
Tea: You're serious?
Todd: Yeah.
Tea: You'd rather go shopping with me than...
Todd: Wait. No. I didn't say anything about you dragging me along while you get your shopping fix.
Tea: I'm am not addicted to shopping.
Todd: I think getting up early in the morning just to go shopping says you have a problem, Tea.
Tea: You know why I went shopping this morning.
Todd: I was trying to forget.
Tea: You really want to abandon whatever we have in the bathroom?
Todd: Sure. It's just stuff, Tea. It's no big deal. I left a lot of stuff behind in Llanview years ago and I don't miss it.
Tea: Yeah, I know. I was one of the things you left behind without missing.
Todd: You know I feel lousy and you have to toss guilt at me right now?
Tea: That's what if felt like, Todd. I was just something that had no value to you...no worth.
[Todd approaches Tea. She tries to step away from him. He stops her by taking her hand in his.]
Todd: Delgado, I left my kid behind.
Tea: I know, Todd. I know that you love her. I never for a minute thought that you left her because you didn't love her.
Todd: But, you thought I left you because of that?
Tea: Yes.
Todd: You were wrong.
Tea: Why did you leave? Why did you stay away so long?
Todd: I thought you wanted to hurry up and get out of here before I change my mind about letting you drive.
Tea: You would rather let me drive than discuss why you left me?
Todd: Yep. Take it or leave it.
Tea: I'll take it, but we're not done discussing this, Todd.
Todd: Oh, yes, we are.
Tea: No, we're not.
Todd: That's it! You're not driving now.
Tea: So, you'll answer my questions?
Todd: No. You're not getting that either.
Tea: Todd...
Todd: Tea, we've already done enough serious talk for now, okay? Let's put the rest of this off. We have time.
Tea: Four days...
Todd: Five, if you count today.
Tea: That's not very long.
Todd: But, we'll be together almost every second so it should feel like an eternity.
Tea: You know, if you didn't look so adorable when you have a hangover...
Todd: Do you want me to get drunk every night so I can look like this in the morning?
Tea: No. No more heavy drinking. No more fighting.
Todd: Get serious, Delgado. You won't even be able to make it to the lobby before you'll start another fight.
Tea: I think I will. I'd rather kiss you right now, Todd, than fight with you.
Todd: Are you sure? You'd probably get more of a thrill out of a fight.
Tea: You give me plenty of thrills, Todd.
[Todd begins to say something but Tea places her finger against his lips to stop him.]
Tea: Don't.
[Tea moves her hand to the back of his head and brings their mouths together for a slow, sensuous kiss.]
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