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| ANOTHER JOURNEY BY TIMA |
CHAPTERS 106 - 110 |
PREVIOUSLY...
Tea: Tell me what I said during my nightmare.
Todd: It's no big deal.
[Todd pauses for a moment and looks into Tea's eyes with an expression on his face that gives no hint to Tea about what he's feeling.]
Todd: You just said that you love me but you don't believe that I ever loved you.
[Todd immediately stands up and walks out of the truck stop.]
***** ***** ***** ***** ***** ***** ***** ***** ***** ***** ***** ***** ***** *****
chapter 106:
[Tea quickly follows Todd out of the truck stop. She opens the car door on the passenger side and places the duffel bag with her belongings in it on the seat.]
Tea: Todd...
Todd: Hurry up and toss your stuff in the trunk. We need to get back on the road.
Tea: I'm going to get something to eat first, okay? I just wanted you to know so you wouldn't think something else and leave without me.
Todd: Fine. Get your grub. Be quick about it.
Tea: Could you put this in the trunk for me? It would be faster.
Todd: I always have to do everything.
[Tea rushes back into the truck stop as Todd puts her things back in the trunk. They both spend the next few minutes thinking about all that has happened, and been said, so far this morning. Todd hopes that there will be no more discussions about any of it. Tea knows they need to talk about all of it.
When Tea returns to the car, she has two large bags with her.]
Todd: You must really be hungry.
Tea: I bought some snacks and beverages for later. That way, we won't have to stop, except for bathroom breaks and gasoline.
Todd: You in a hurry to get where we're going for some reason?
Tea: I guess I am.
Todd: Why is that?
Tea: Do you really want me to answer that question?
Todd: No.
[More than a minute passes silently as Tea eats her breakfast and Todd begins driving again.]
Todd: What exactly are you expecting tonight?
Tea: Exactly? Well, I suppose I'm expecting...let's see... Kissing. Some hugging. I'll remove your shirt. You'll remove mine. You'll remove my bra.
Todd: Wait. Isn't that taking things a little fast?
Tea: I thought we agreed that tonight was the night I would sleep in your arms topless.
Todd: I don't remember agreeing to that.
Tea: Well, you have a few hours to think about it.
Todd: So, if I decide not to...?
Tea: I don't want you to do anything that you don't want to do.
Todd: So, this conversation is over?
Tea: Don't you think we should agree on this in advance?
Todd: This isn't one of those lawyer deals, you know? We don't have to spell everything out in detail.
Tea: I just thought it might make it less awkward if we agreed in advance how far we'll be going tonight. There also would be less chance for any misunderstandings or disappointments from anyone having expectations that are too high.
Todd: Since when? It doesn't matter what we agree to, you always push it further.
Tea: Me?
Todd: Yeah, you. You're always jumping me and pressing body parts against me.
Tea: Well, you've pressed your body part against me.
[There's an awkward silence for several moments.]
Tea: This is what I was trying to avoid with this discussion.
Todd (sarcastically): Well, look what a great job you did.
Tea: Fine. We don't have to verbally spell everything out. Maybe we could set up some sort of signal.
Todd: A signal?
Tea: Yes. Either a signal that lets the other person know that it's okay for them to go further or a signal that makes it clear that they need to stop.
Todd: I thought just yelling, "Get the hell off of me," would work fine.
Tea: That was your plan?
Todd: I'd stop.
Tea: I thought you meant you were planning to say that to me.
Todd: Well, if I need to.
Tea: You seemed to be okay with what we did last night and this morning...before I pushed it too far.
Todd: Yeah, so?
Tea: So, I just want to know if it's okay if I continue to do that to you.
Todd: You're really going to make us spell this all out, aren't you?
Tea: No. I just want to know what you like, Todd...what you want...what you need.
Todd: I need you to stop talking about this stuff. We're almost there. Can't you be quiet until we get there?
Tea: I thought you said it would be four or five hours.
Todd: And, your point is?
Tea: My point is...
[Tea pauses for a moment. Todd hopes she's giving up on conversing with him right now but he knows Tea better than that.]
Tea: I guess my point is that I do love you, Todd.
[Tea turns her head away from him and looks out the side window as she speaks softly.]
Tea: I wish I didn't.
[Todd knows that if he just keeps his mouth shut right now, the talking will stop, at least for a while.]
Todd: You don't want that?
[Tea looks back at Todd, who has his eyes plastered to the road in front of him. He's glad he's driving right now. This conversation would be even worse if he had to look at her eyes during it.]
Tea: It isn't that I don't...
[Tea pauses again, trying to make sense out of her own thoughts.]
Tea: Truthfully, I don't want that, Todd. I don't even understand it. I just know that it hurts. I know that I'll be alone in the end. I know that you don't, or can't, feel that way about me. I wish I didn't feel it either. I wish it would stop. I know how much more it will hurt when this ends. When any of my other relationships ended it wasn't like it was while you were gone. With anyone else, I might have missed them a little but I think most of the time it wasn't really that person, or that relationship, that I missed. I just missed having someone there...anyone. All I had to do to get over it was find someone else to be there. It didn't matter who. When you were gone, I missed you. I wasn't missing having just anyone around. I was missing having you in my life. I was missing living with you...debating with you...trying with you. I missed showing you that I loved you. There were times that I knew you wouldn't accept overt displays of that love so I tried to show you in small ways that you probably didn't even notice.
[Tea stops talking and looks out the window at the passing scenery again. She feels lousy. She feels like she can physically feel all the love inside her and it just feels painful.]
Todd (quietly): I noticed.
[Tea quickly looks back at him, not believing what he said and uncertain what it means.]
chapter 107:
[Todd and Tea are both silent for a long time as they continue to drive through Montana. They listen to the radio as they each try to comprehend their own emotions and those of the other person.
This time it's Todd who finally breaks the silence.]
Todd: You're sure you don't want to go to that Yellowstone place? We're not passed it yet. We could still turn and go down there.
Tea: I think where we're going is fine.
Todd: You've always dreamed of going to Butte, Montana?
Tea: I have a feeling that I'll have some wonderful memories of Butte after tonight.
Todd: Oh, really?
Tea: I have wonderful memories of so many places now because of you.
Todd: Oh, yeah, those wonderful memories of you picking fights and ditching me from one side of the country to the other.
Tea: Wonderful memories of making love to you. At least now you know that's what it's been for me.
[Tea is surprised when Todd suddenly exits the freeway they're on.]
Todd: Don't say a word.
Tea: Todd...
Todd: Don't say anymore words.
Tea: I don't understand.
Todd: Just let this happen.
Tea: What?
Todd: Fine. Forget it. I'll just turn around and get back on that damn freeway. This was a stupid idea, anyway.
Tea: What was?
[Todd sighs in a manner that lets Tea know she's irritating him.]
Tea: I'm through talking. Just do whatever you wanted to do.
[Tea sits with her arms crossing her chest, trying to keep herself from speaking again since she wants to know what Todd is planning.
Todd drives until he finds a secluded area. He turns off the road they're on and drives a short distance. He parks the car and quickly gets out. Tea watches him walk away from the car, uncertain if he expects her to follow him.
When Todd realizes that Tea hasn't gotten out of the car yet, he turns toward her.]
Todd (raising his voice so she'll hear him): You want to do this or not?
[Tea opens the car door and gets out.]
Tea: Do what, Todd?
Todd: Get over here and find out.
[Todd continues walking. Tea follows him. Eventually the path they're on ends at the edge of a small river or stream. He stops. Tea soon catches up to him.]
Tea: You didn't say we would be hiking today.
Todd: You said you wanted exercise.
Tea: I'm just glad I wore comfortable shoes.
[Tea takes a moment to look at the area around them.]
Tea: Why are we here, Todd?
Todd: I don't know.
[Tea studies his face, trying to understand what he's thinking...what he's feeling.]
Todd: So, what do you think this is? A river? Stream? Creek? What's that other one? Brook?
Tea: I really don't care.
[Todd is silent for several minutes as he stares at the water. Tea continues to watch him carefully.]
Tea: Todd, what is it?
[Todd doesn't respond.]
Tea: Is it what I said? Is it that you don't believe it?
Todd (laughing nervously): Of course I don't believe it. It's a lie.
Tea: I swear it isn't.
Todd: Yeah, it is. You don't even know what the hell it is so how can you know if that's what you feel?
Tea: Maybe I don't. Maybe I don't understand it. I feel something. Tell me what love feels like.
Todd: It feels...
[Todd stops speaking, wishing he didn't know what it felt like. For a moment, Tea is certain she can see Todd's eyes filling with liquid. His facial expression quickly changes, though, and any tears that may have been forming in his eyes seem to immediately evaporate.]
Todd: Let's go back to the car.
Tea: Wait.
[Tea places her hand on his arm to stop him. He doesn't look at her but he doesn't move away from her touch either.]
Todd: We should forget this whole thing. It was a stupid idea.
Tea: What was? This walk? This trip? These feelings?
Todd: You're knocked up.
Tea: And, if I'm not?
Todd: You are.
Tea: What if I'm not, Todd? What if there is nothing preventing us from being together?
Todd: There's plenty preventing us from that.
Tea: What?
Todd: Everything.
Tea: Todd, right now, in this moment, there's just you and me.
Todd: And, the kid you got knocked up with, don't forget.
Tea: How could I forget? You never stop bringing it up. Why did you bring me out here? Just to remind me yet again how you'll never forgive me for having a life while you were gone for more than a year?
[Todd doesn't respond.]
Tea: Why are we here?
[Todd starts to respond but stops himself.]
Tea: What is it, Todd? What do you want to tell me?
Todd: That... Just that we should get back to the car.
Tea: I want you to believe that I love you. I want you to feel it, even if it doesn't mean anything to you.
Todd: You want me to feel that, Delgado?
Tea: Yes.
Todd: You hate me that much?
Tea: No.
Todd: But, you want me to feel that kind of pain. Don't you get it, Delgado? Last night you were in agony because you were stupid enough to feel something. You want me to put myself through that?
Tea: I want to love you so much that you won't hurt anymore.
Todd: You're dreaming. There's no such thing. If you feel, you hurt. That's how it is.
Tea: Does it have to be that way?
Todd: Yes.
Tea: What if I choose the pain, Todd?
Todd: You'll run. I know you will. People think they can take it. They think they can handle it, but they all run.
Tea: I won't.
Todd: Yeah, you will.
Tea: I promise...
Todd: Don't. Just don't, okay? Promises are lies. Love is a lie. Happiness is worse than a lie, it's a joke. You have to be an idiot to believe in any of that junk.
Tea: Then, let's be idiots. We're all alone. No one will know that we took a chance. We could try.
Todd: We'd just fail...again. Look how many times we tried before. We screwed it up every time.
Tea: This time could be different.
Todd: There's no chance.
[For several minutes they don't speak as they each turn their gazes back to the water.]
Tea: Todd?
Todd: What?
Tea: We'll know the answer soon.
Todd: How soon?
Tea: Very soon.
Todd: Is it already time?
Tea: Not quite.
Todd: But, almost?
Tea: Yes.
Todd: Why are you telling me this?
Tea: I want to continue what we've been doing. We agreed to continue this journey together until nature gave us that answer. It hasn't yet, but it will very soon. When it does, then we'll find a way to sabotage this. Until then, let's forget about everything else and just do what we both want to do.
Todd: Which is?
Tea: We'll finish our drive for the day, check into a nice hotel, find something to do to occupy our time like we did last night.
Todd: You're going to start another fight?
Tea: You started the fight last night.
Todd: I don't remember it that way. So, are you planning to steal my car again, too?
Tea: I don't know yet. I'll have to see how much you end up ticking me off tonight.
Todd: Me, ticking you off?
Tea: If we do fight then we'll have fun making up...and making out.
Todd: Yeah?
Tea: Yeah.
Todd: So, no more of this feeling stuff?
Tea: I'll continue feeling it, but we don't have to talk about it.
Todd: Good.
Tea: Before we end this, maybe you could tell me if you ever felt anything, even a little bit. Until then, let's just do what we've been doing. Let's enjoy this for as long as we can.
Todd: So, we both agree this is doomed?
Tea: It's never worked out for me in the past.
Todd: Me either...not for very long.
Tea: So, we'll just do this until it ends. We'll enjoy each other, and experience each other, as much as we can until we run out of time.
Todd: How long before then?
Tea: I'll tell you when I get my period.
Todd: Or, when you don't.
Tea: If I don't.
Todd: When you don't.
Tea: Could you do me a favor?
Todd: Depends on what it is.
Tea: For the rest of the day, could you think positively about this?
Todd: You're asking for too much, just like you always do.
Tea: Fine. Could you at least not make any more references to my being knocked up?
Todd: Just for today?
Tea: I'd prefer longer, but I'll accept a reprieve for the rest of the day and night.
Todd: You're pushing again.
Tea: I enjoy making out with you more when you're not upsetting me. Okay?
Todd: Well, I have to put up with making out with you while I'm upset about your being knocked up. Why should you get special treatment?
Tea: Could you just try it?
Todd: I could try. Do you need me to carry you back to the car since you're knocked up? Oops! I guess I'll have to try harder.
Tea: You know, I am kind of tired from the hike to get here. I think you will have to carry me back in your muscular arms.
Todd: We can stay here for a while and rest.
Tea: I wouldn't mind that, either. I always have wanted to make out by a river, creek, brook...whatever.
chapter 108:
Todd: You want to do that making out thing here?
Tea: It is beautiful here.
Todd: It is?
Tea: And, we are alone.
Todd: Are you sure about that? There could be someone spying on us.
Tea: Well, that could happen with a two-way mirror in a motel room, too.
Todd: You're right.
Tea: So, what, now we'll have to make out only in the dark?
Todd: No.
Tea: Good. I like looking at your body.
Todd: I meant that they could see us in the dark, too, if they're using the right equipment.
Tea: Forget I said anything, okay?
Todd: Too late.
Tea: You're really determined to not make love to me anymore, is that it?
Todd: I didn't say that.
Tea: But your paranoia will conveniently prevent anything further from happening between us.
Todd: You want to make out with the whole world watching?
Tea: I want to make out with you, Todd. I don't think anyone will see us here but if they did, it wouldn't bother me all that much since I know it won't be going too far. I know no body parts will be exposed.
Todd: So, you didn't want to get naked and do it right here on the ground?
Tea: No...for that, we'd go back to the car.
[Todd grimaces as Tea laughs.
Several minutes pass. Todd picks up several pieces of debris nearby and tosses them as far as he can. He finally stops when Tea comes up behind him and places her arms around his body, pressing her own body against his from behind. She rests her head against his shoulder and closes her eyes, enjoying the sensation of their bodies pressed together.]
Todd: What are you doing, Delgado?
Tea: Enjoying myself.
Todd: I can tell.
Tea: Let me, Todd. Maybe you could even enjoy it, too.
Todd: You expect me to enjoy this?
Tea: Yes.
Todd: Having your body pressed against me like this?
Tea: Do you enjoy it?
Todd: It's not as bad as being lit on fire.
Tea: So, there is a worse fate?
Todd: I suppose.
Tea: We could change places.
Todd: Why would we want to do that?
Tea: I just thought that if you had any kind of urge to hold me...
Todd: You think I have those kinds of urges?
Tea: Do you?
Todd: You don't want to know about my urges.
Tea: Maybe I do.
Todd: Maybe you just think you do.
Tea: Maybe I want to know everything about you, Todd. Your thoughts. Your feelings.
Todd: I thought we weren't talking about feelings anymore.
Tea: You don't have to tell me how it feels emotionally.
Todd: Good.
Tea: Tell me how it feels physically.
Todd: It feels like you're squeezing me.
Tea: Do you enjoy it?
Todd: What's with all the questions?
Tea: Fine. No more questions. We'll just stand here quietly while I hold you.
[Todd allows her to embrace him for several minutes.]
Todd: Tea?
[She doesn't respond.]
Todd: Did you fall asleep back there?
Tea: No.
Todd: Are we done with the hugging yet?
[Tea reluctantly lets go of Todd's body and steps slightly away from him.]
Tea: Thank you.
Todd: For what?
Tea: For letting me hold you for a few minutes.
Todd: It felt more like an hour. You probably screwed up our schedule. We should get out of here and back on the road.
Tea: Could we share a kiss first?
Todd: Isn't it kind of cold for that?
Tea: I feel fine.
Todd: Maybe I should check that out for myself.
Tea: What?
Todd: How you feel.
Tea: Maybe you should.
[Todd steps closer to Tea. The look on her face unnerves him.]
Todd: Do you have to smile like that?
Tea: Like what?
Todd: Like you're happy you just tricked me into something. Or, you're about to trick me into something.
Tea: No tricks, I promise.
Todd: So, I could take you in my arms and hold you really tight and you wouldn't try anything?
Tea: Well...
Todd: Right. It was a stupid idea. Let's go.
Tea: Todd, you know, I wouldn't have to try anything if you tried something first.
Todd: You want me to try something?
Tea: Yes.
Todd: Anything?
Tea: I trust you completely.
Todd: So, you've lost your mind completely. That explains what you're doing with me.
Tea: I'm with you because I want to be with you, because there is no place else that I'd rather be in this moment or in this lifetime.
Todd: Tea?
Tea: Yes?
Todd: I'm only doing this because I want you to shut up.
[Todd quickly steps into her personal space and kisses her while his arms encircle her body and pull her tightly against his own body.
After several minutes of passionately kissing, Todd pulls slightly away but keeps her in his arms.]
Todd: Tea?
Tea: Yes?
Todd: Do you want me to touch you?
Tea: Yes.
[Todd quickly opens the jacket she's wearing and places his hand over her breast, through her shirt.
They kiss again for several moments while he continues to feel her up.]
Todd: Do you want me to go further?
Tea: Yes.
[Todd's hand moves down between their bodies and pulls her shirt out of the pants she's wearing. His hand quickly burrows under the bottom of her shirt and again finds her breast. His hand caresses her breast through her bra for several moments while they stare intently at each other.]
Todd: Further?
Tea: Yes.
[Todd's thumb plays with her nipple as he carefully watches her eyes.]
Todd: You're sure?
Tea: I want you to touch me.
Todd: We could wait.
Tea: We could.
Todd: Do you want to?
Tea: No. Do you?
[Todd's hand pauses as he considers his options. He finds it difficult to think clearly, though, with his hand against her breast.
When he finally speaks, his voice is a whisper.]
Todd: Delgado...
[Todd brings his lips to hers and kisses her gently. He still feels intense passion towards her but he wants her to know that it's more than physical.
When Todd ends their kiss, Tea looks in his eyes. She knows he's nervous and wants to eliminate his concerns.]
Tea: I trust you, Todd.
Todd: You shouldn't.
Tea: I do. I want you to touch me.
Todd: My hand's probably cold.
Tea: It's been inside my shirt for a while now. I know it's warm. I know it will feel good.
Todd: No, you don't.
Tea: Yes, I do. Touch me, Todd.
chapter 109:
[They both feel awkward as they stand close to each other while Todd's hand is under her shirt pressing against her breast through her bra. Neither speaks as Todd decides whether to go further.
Finally, Todd kisses her again. Tea tries to focus fully on his kiss and ignore the uncertainty of what his hand under her shirt will do. When she feels his hand move and his thumb touch her skin between her breasts, though, she can't prevent a moan from escaping. As his thumb moves underneath her bra, advancing toward the nipple he had previously been caressing through her bra, her breathing increases.
The anticipation rises to a peak and explodes as his flesh touches her nipple for the first time. They both moan as they continue to kiss, their tongues more active than ever before.
Soon, Todd has her bra pushed up and out of the way as his hand cups her breast.
Tea is surprised when he suddenly stops kissing her. He stares at her eyes as his hand moves against her breast. He can't believe that he's standing in front of Tea, his hand under her shirt, his fingers caressing her erect nipple. She isn't pulling away from him. She wants him to touch her. She trust him. She loves him.]
Todd (whispering): Delgado...
[Tea is disappointed for a moment as she feels his hand leave her breast. She's certain that he'll pull away and retreat, regretting that they went so far. She's stunned when he doesn't pull his hand out from under her shirt but instead places his arms around her and pulls her tightly against him. Tea quickly returns his embrace.
For several minutes, they hold each other. Each savors the moment. The more time that passes, though, without Todd moving, or speaking, the more concerned Tea becomes.]
Tea: Todd?
[He doesn't respond.]
Tea: Todd? Are you okay?
[Todd's body stiffens. He immediately pulls away. His hand under her shirt gets caught for a moment but he quickly disentangles it and steps away from her, refusing her eye contact.]
Tea: Todd...
Todd: It's no big deal. I felt up a lot of chicks before you and there will be a lot more after you.
Tea: I imagine there will be. I've been felt up before, too. It did feel different this time, though.
Todd: Let's get the hell out of here.
Tea: The way you kissed me and the way you held me, it felt different.
Todd: That's the way I've always done it.
Tea: I thought that maybe...
[Tea pauses for a moment as tears come to her eyes that she refuses to let fall.]
Tea: Right. That's your routine. It wasn't anything special.
[Tea turns and walks back towards their car. Todd knows that she caught him caring about her. She let him off the hook, though. He knows immediately that she didn't do it for him. She believed that he felt something beyond her body. She allowed herself to feel loved, or at least cared for, and now she's shutting down and convincing herself that it wasn't real, that she just imagined it. He knows that it's his fault. He got spooked by his own feelings and he needed to distance himself. He knows that he hurt her by trying to protect himself. Now, watching her protect herself is hurting him. He hates this.
Todd slowly follows the path back to the car, needing extra time to deal with what happened. When he finally reaches the car, he finds Tea already seated in the front passenger seat.
As he settles himself into the driver's seat, he quickly starts the car, prepared to speed away and return to the monotony of the freeway.
As they continue to stay there for several minutes with the motor running but Todd not leaving their parking spot, Tea becomes more and more uncomfortable. She wants to return to silently driving, too. Any other possibility is too much for her right now.
Finally, Todd turns off the car. He sits completely still, though, not moving or speaking. Tea becomes nervous.]
Tea: We should be getting back on the road, shouldn't we? You wanted to take the car to a mechanic and if we don't get where we're going early enough, you might not find a mechanic to look at the car tonight. That would throw our schedule off and we don't want that, right?
[Todd doesn't respond. Tea becomes even more uncomfortable.]
Tea: Fine. I'll drive.
Todd: Get out of the car.
Tea: You're letting me drive?
Todd: No.
[Tea realizes that he must have decided to end their trip now, because of what just happened between them.]
Tea: You're leaving me here? This is the middle of nowhere, Todd. Couldn't you at least have the decency to drive me to a town? We don't even have to speak to each other while we drive.
Todd: I hate it when you do this to me.
Tea: Well, I don't exactly enjoy being felt up and then dumped in the middle of nowhere. But, don't think you're special because you're certainly not the only person to ever do this to me.
[Tea gets out of the car and slams the door. She immediately begins briskly walking towards the road they had been on earlier.
She hears Todd slam his car door and utter a few words of profanity, followed by the sound of his footsteps quickly descending upon her.
Tea begins running, not wanting to face any more pain, or play any more games with Todd.
Despite her attempts to outrun him, Todd quickly catches up to her. She looks at him with disbelief as he runs alongside her for a moment before speaking.]
Todd: Nice day for a jog, huh?
[Tea stops running. Todd quickly realizes she stopped and turns back toward her. He jogs in place as she tries to figure out what he's up to this time.]
Todd: You want to run back to the car or do you want to walk?
Tea: I want out of this, Todd. I'm tired.
Todd: That's probably because you're knocked up.
Tea: Shut up, Todd!
Todd: This is why I won't exercise with you. You get so testy when you find out I'm better at something than you are.
Tea: I can't do this anymore.
[Todd stops jogging in place.]
Todd: Okay. We'll just walk back.
Tea: No.
Todd: You're still angling for me to carry you?
[Tea doesn't respond.]
Todd: Okay, you win. I'll carry you.
[Todd steps into Tea's personal space and prepares to pick her up but she takes several steps away from him.]
Tea: What are you doing?
Todd: I'm starting to get ticked of. Make up your mind. What do you want from me?
Tea: Me? What about you?
Todd: I've carried you before. You're not that heavy. I think I can handle carrying you back to the car.
Tea: You know what I mean.
Todd: Yeah, I do. But, you took off on me before I could tell you back at the car...before I could show you, too.
Tea: Tell me what? Show me what?
Todd: Not out here in front of people.
Tea: What people? There's no one out here.
[A moment later a car speeds passed them on the road they're standing alongside. Tea can't help but smile slightly at Todd's slight smirk.]
Tea: Why did you tell me to get out of the car?
Todd: Can't we do this back at the car?
Tea: I need to know. Were you planning on leaving me there?
Todd: Of course not. I never said anything like that. You assumed, like you always do, that I meant something bad. You never have any faith in me.
[Tea considers her options for a moment. As she steps into his personal space, he gives her a questioning look.]
Tea: You're carrying me.
Todd: I am, am I?
Tea: You made a promise. I'm not letting you out of it.
[Tea notices a slight smile on Todd's lips as he leans over in front of her and places his arm around her leg.]
Tea: What are you doing?
Todd: I'm going to fling you over my shoulder.
Tea: No, you're not.
[Todd stands up and faces her again.]
Todd: I agreed to carrying you. This is one way of doing it.
Tea: Well, it's not the way we'll be doing it.
Todd: You think I'd drop you?
Tea: Carry me the way you carried me before.
Todd: I thought that was just for threshold crossings.
Tea: It's either that or I sit on your shoulders.
Todd: You're a ruthless negotiator.
Tea: Don't you ever forget it.
[Tea places her arms around his neck as he gently picks her up in his arms and begins to walk back towards their car.]
chapter 110:
[Todd and Tea are halfway to the car as Todd carries her in his arms.]
Todd: You're a lot heavier than I remember you being, Delgado.
Tea: The last time you didn't carry me as far.
Todd: Or, maybe you've gained weight.
Tea: We have been eating a lot of fast food.
Todd: Or...
Tea: Don't start, Todd.
Todd: I'm not the one who started it. But, fine. No more mentioning the unmentionable for the rest of the day.
Tea: Thank you.
Todd: I think you should give me something in return.
Tea: Oh, I'll give you something tonight, if that's what you want.
[Todd suddenly stops walking.]
Tea: I was kidding, Todd. What would you like in return?
Todd: You can't take off on me again for the rest of the night.
Tea: I think I can agree to that as long as you...
Todd: No way. I don't get any outs so neither do you.
Tea: Todd, I won't put up with just any kind of treatment. You have to at least treat me with some respect.
Todd: Just some?
Tea: Allow me to be more specific...complete and utter respect.
Todd: Maybe we should argue about this in the car while we're driving because you really are starting to feel heavy.
Tea: You can put me down now.
Todd: We had a deal. I don't renege on deals.
Tea: Since when?
[Todd starts walking towards the car again.]
Todd: Shouldn't that respect go both ways? Shouldn't you be banned from trying to tick me off for the rest of the day?
Tea: I think we will tick each other off. I think we will argue.
Todd: Yeah. I guess the only way we can guarantee we don't do that is if we're not together.
Tea: Well, I don't want that.
Todd: Neither do I.
Tea: Todd...
Todd: Let it go.
Tea: Okay.
[The rest of the way to the car is spent silently. When they finally reach the car, Todd sets her down.
He places his hands on her sides and gently holds her against the side of the car.]
Tea: Are you going to tell me, or show me, what you were planning to earlier before I misunderstood?
Todd: Before you assumed the worst, like you always do.
[Tea places her arms around his body and encourages him to bring his body even closer to hers.]
Tea: You know why I assume that, don't you?
Todd: Yeah.
Tea: It's easier for me to believe...
Todd (finishing her thought for her): ... that everything's gonna work out lousy. I know.
Tea: It will, won't it?
Todd: Yeah.
Tea: Do you like that?
Todd: You think that turns me on?
Tea: I meant, does knowing it won't work out make it easier for you now?
Todd: I don't know. I suppose...in some ways.
Tea: What ways?
Todd: Do you have to over-analyze everything?
Tea: I'm curious.
Todd: You're nosy. And, you're pushy. And, you're...
Tea: Maybe you should stop before...
Todd: Before, you take off running again?
Tea: I am sorry about that. I thought you were leaving me here. I thought that what we had done had been too much for you.
Todd: Maybe it was.
Tea: Why?
Todd: You're doing it again.
Tea: How can I understand if we don't talk about it?
Todd: You don't need to understand.
Tea: I feel like I do.
Todd: We both agreed that we're in this until you get your answer.
Tea: But, we both have tried to walk away since then.
Todd: Actually, you tried running away. And, last night, you tried driving away. Remember stealing my car?
Tea: I did not steal it. It's my car, too.
Todd: Well, then you owe me thousands of dollars for your half of the car.
Tea: I'll pay for the mechanic tonight. I seem to have amassed quite a lot of cash during this trip.
Todd: Is that the real reason you came? For the money?
Tea: I don't want your money, Todd. I want a lot more than that.
Todd: It would be easier if you wanted the money.
Tea: What fun would easy be?
Todd: True. I didn't get hooked up with you looking for easy.
[They both are comfortably silent for several moments.]
Todd: So, we should get going, right?
Tea: I thought you wanted to tell me something.
Todd: I'd rather show you.
[Todd leans toward Tea and kisses her gently. As their lips part, they keep their bodies close as they gaze at each other.]
Tea: So, what you're trying to tell me is...
Todd: I'm trying to tell you -- I like kissing you, Tea.
Tea: You do? You like it?
Todd: Well, I don't hate it.
Tea (nervously): Do you love it?
Todd: Do I love kissing you?
Tea: Do you, Todd? Do you...love...
Todd: Do I love?
Tea: Kissing...me?
Todd: Knowing the answer to that is important to you?
Tea: I want to know how you feel about me...about kissing me.
Todd: You want to know if I love...your kissing?
Tea: Do you?
Todd: Maybe you should give me another sample.
[They kiss again, very tenderly. As the kiss ends, Todd buries his face in her neck and kisses her skin as he speaks.]
Todd: I...love...kissing...you, Delgado.
[His arms move around her, pulling her into him as he kisses behind her ear for several moment before kissing her neck...chin...cheek...lips.
When he finally stops kissing her, he looks deeply into her eyes as his words spill out, uncontrolled.]
Todd: I love touching you. I love holding you. Tea, I love...I love... Aw, hell! I love...
Tea: You love kissing me?
Todd: I love kissing you, Tea. For a long time, I've loved kissing you. I'll probably love kissing you for the rest of my life.
Tea: I love kissing you, too.
[Their lips instantly collide again, each enjoying the delicious contact. They both know that they just expressed their love for each other and that the other person understands that. They also know that those feelings will continue to be doubted by each of them. Neither has ever felt like love could ever really last for them. It has to be a mistake or a temporary illusion. It can't be real. It can't last.
Neither is allowing their doubts or insecurities to invade this moment, though. Later, their minds will try to talk them out of believing that love could ever have a lasting place in their life. Right now, they each are kissing someone who loves kissing them and they have no intention of stopping until their lips, and tongues, are too exhausted to continue.]
to be continued...
