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| ELSEWHERE BY SHADY |
CHAPTER 4 |
She pulls the door slightly ajar...nothing but dark. She closes her eyes, takes a breath....and swings the door open all the way. She opens her eyes as the light falls on the object sitting just inside...a manila envelope, with one word written on it..."Delgado." She squats down to be at eye-level with the locker, and looks toward the back...but there's nothing else. She turns and looks behind her again. No one is watching. Cautiously, she picks up the envelope, stands up and shuts the locker. She stuffs the envelope inside her coat and walks to the ladies' room.
Once in the bathroom, she goes into one of the stalls and latches the door. She takes the envelope out of her coat. She examines it...it hasn't been sealed, just held shut with the clasp. She takes another deep breath and opens it. Peering inside, she sees one small, unusual looking thing. She reaches in, grabs it and pulls it out...
Her eyes widen as she recognizes it...a piece of a picture, mounted on cardboard and cut into a puzzle piece. The empty envelope falls from her hand, and suddenly she feels as if the wind has been knocked out of her. She leans against the wall and slumps down to the floor. She stares at it for a long time, utterly silent. The only indication of emotion is the glassiness in her eyes, as they start to fill up.
She sees herself, and him, back in the cabana. He's pacing behind her, juggling the moon she gave him, as she puts the puzzle together. All the pieces lock, and finally there's only one missing piece of this picture of himself...the center. She looks all around, but can't find it. She looks at him...and he looks back, telling her with no words to figure it out.
Figure WHAT out? After that horrible night, there was nothing to figure. ..or so she thought. She clasps the puzzle piece and puts her head down on her hands, at a loss. She flashes back to that night again...the roller coaster ride of emotions...the big drop of his leaving her at the altar in front of the whole town...the frustration, anger as they argued... the anxiety as they went ahead with it anyway...and then stalled each other in the cabana. Then the leveling out...as they finally got honest enough with each other to admit they were scared...and the closeness, the happiness of the little bit of intimacy they achieved...before the biggest drop of all. Hitting the absolute depths as her dream shattered into a million pieces...the realization that everything he'd ever told her, everything he'd ever done in front of her, was a lie...and that he never loved her. Tears start to stream down her cheeks for the second time that day. She tilts her head back until it touches the wall.
"Oh god..." she whispers. She looks back at the puzzle piece, which seems to contradict everything she thought she learned that night. But why would he even bother sending this to her, unless...
She gets up and comes out of the stall, walking over to the sinks. She turns on the cold water and puts one hand under the tap, holding the piece in the other hand, still staring at it. Cupping her hand, she scoops some of the water up and rubs it into her eyes. She dries her face on her sleeve and shoves the puzzle piece in her pocket, as she looks up and catches her reflection in the mirror.
She looks at herself for a long time, her mind amazingly clear. And after a while, she realizes that she thinks she knows now...knows what he's trying to say. At the very least, she knows for certain that the puzzle, and his giving it to her, was symbolic...that only SHE could take the pieces of him and fit them together. And the center piece...the heart of him that he held back before, now here in her hands. So...what else could it possibly mean...but that he DOES love her. She closes her eyes. It would seem that the ball is in her court now.
She opens her eyes, furrowing her brow, remembering the annulment papers he sent before this.
But an annulment...would cut the ties...would separate them for good.
Then her mind goes back further...to when he told her she could have the divorce she wanted, because of that saying...about letting a bird go, or something...
Oh, yeah...if you love something, set it free. If it comes back to you, it's yours...if it doesn't, then... it never was yours to begin with.
He's doing it all over again...letting her go, to tell her he loves her, and to find out if she feels the same.
She lets out a deep sigh, looking around her at the empty stalls, listening to the muffled, echo-y sounds of the people outside. She smiles, then cracks up, suddenly realizing that she's just gone through all of this life-changing stuff in a public bathroom. She shakes her head, taking a quick glance at her watch...7:45.
"Oh, damn," she curses, remembering that she has to be in court at nine, and still has to look over the case file...not to mention get a shower an= get dressed. She grabs her stuff and heads out.
To be continued...
