- "Anybody can write books, but it takes an artist to make a dry Martini that's dry enough." Madame Arcanti, Blithe Spirit (Noel Coward)
- "Time is the reef upon which all our frail mystic ships are wrecked." Madame Arcanti, Blithe Spirit (Noel Coward)
- "I long ago came to the conclusion that nothing has ever been definitively proved about anything." Madame Arcanti, Blithe Spirit (Noel Coward)
- "Hers is quite a tranquil madness." Monica Reed, Present Laughter (Noel Coward)
- "The only thing that's frustrating me at the moment is a wholesome fear of the gallows." Monica Reed, Present Laughter (Noel Coward)
- "Really, Barbara! You go on as if religion were a pleasant subject. Do have some sense of propriety." Lady Britomart, Major Barbara (Bernard Shaw)
- "A man can't make cannons any the better for being his own cousin instead of his proper self." Lady Britomart, Major Barbara (Bernard Shaw)
- "I can assure you that if you will only take the trouble always to do the perfectly correct thing and say the perfectly correct thing, you can do just what you like." Ariadne Utterwood, Heartbreak House (Bernard Shaw)
- "A good deal of my hair is quite genuine." Ariadne Utterwood, Heartbreak House (Bernard Shaw)
- "Hamlet, thou hast thy father much offended." Queen Gertrude, Hamlet (William Shakespeare)
- "More matter, with less art." Queen Gertrude, Hamlet (William Shakespeare)
- "The lady protests too much, methinks." Queen Gertrude, Hamlet (Wiliam Shakespeare)
- "O, what a rash and bloody deed is this!" Queen Gertrude, Hamlet (William Shakespeare)
- "O Hamlet, speak no more: Thou turn'st mine eyes into my very soul; And there I see such black and grained spots As will not leave their tinct." Queen Gertrude, Hamlet (William Shakespeare)
- "You're all demureness, butter wouldn't melt in your mouth, one would think to look at you." Mme. Pernelle, Tartuffe (Moliere)
- "Most aptly, 'tis the Tower of Babylon, where all, beyond all limit, babble on." Mme. Pernelle, Tartuffe (Molier)
- "Observe me, Sir Anthony. I would by no means wish a daughter of mine to be a progeny of learning; I don’t think so much learning becomes a young woman; for instance, I would never let her meddle with Greek, or Hebrew, or algebra, or simony, or fluxions, or paradoxes, or such inflammatory branches of learning—neither would it be necessary for her to handle any of your mathematical, astronomical, diabolical instruments.—But, Sir Anthony, I would send her, at nine years old, to a boarding-school, in order to learn a little ingenuity and artifice. Then, sir, she should have a supercilious knowledge in accounts;—and as she grew up, I would have her instructed in geometry, that she might know something of the contagious countries;—but above all, Sir Anthony, she should be mistress of orthodoxy, that she might not mis-spell, and mis-pronounce words so shamefully as girls usually do; and likewise that she might reprehend the true meaning of what she is saying. This, Sir Anthony, is what I would have a woman know;—and I don’t think there is a superstitious article in it." Mrs. Malaprop, The Rivals (Richard Sheridan)
- "He is the very pineapple of politeness!" Mrs. Malaprop, The Rivals (Richard Sheridan)
- "Sure, if I reprehend any thing in this world it is the use of my oracular tongue, and a nice derangement of epitaphs!" Mrs. Malaprop, The Rivals (Richard Sheridan)
- "(S)he’s as headstrong as an allegory on the banks of Nile." Mrs. Malaprop, The Rivals (Richard Sheridan)
- "I love the dog!" Yvonne, Sunday in the Park with George (Stephen Sondheim)
- "Daaarrrrrllinnnnggg, don't clutch Mother's hand quite so tightly. Thank you." Yvonne, Sunday in the Park with George (Stephen Sondheim)
- "I was rather fond of George." Yvonne, Sunday in the Park with George (Stephen Sondheim)
- "We got no juice!" Naomi Eisen, Sunday in the Park with George (Stephen Sondheim)
- "And then when you gotta collaborate!" Naomi Eisen, Sunday in the Park with George (Stephen Sondheim)
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