Chapter 11

All I wanted was a white knight...


Stopped at a stoplight later that week, Alex checked one last time to be sure that Tana’s gift was perfect. He glanced quickly into the small box at the thin silver necklace. Hanging from the 18” chain was a heart outlined in small rubies. On the back, he had had the jeweler engrave a message. Alex readjusted the pendant one last time before closing the box and placing it back in his pocket.

~**~**~**~**~**~**~

As she waited outside her complex on a bench, Tana clutched Alex’s gift in her hand. She had spent what seemed like years prowling the mall trying to figure out what she could possibly get the man who had everything. Just as she was wearing down, Tana had found the perfect gift. It had been difficult shopping for Alex, but she had eventually settled on 2 gifts, both perfect for him.

~**~**~**~**~**~**~

It was 6:30 by the time Tana and Alex took their seats at a little café in suburban Orlando. They ordered their drinks (Coke for Tana and Iced tea for Alex—no lemon!) and Tana asked, “Should we do gifts now, or…?”

“I’d rather have you come back to my house,” Alex said. “One of my presents, well… part of it’s at home.”

“Okay,” Tana said. She was very confused as to what Alex had up his sleeve.

Soon thereafter, Tana and Alex ordered.

After that, they ate.

Then they left.

They drove to Alex’s house.

Yeah.

~**~**~**~**~**~**~

“You go first,” Alex said after they had settled into the living room with drinks.

Tana first handed Alex and envelope. Inside was a card. It said:

Congratulations! You have just received a subscription to BOP! Magazine! Now you will get monthly updates delivered right to your mailbox. You’ll be the only one at school who’s up on all the latest info on starts like Jessica Simpson, Hanson and (of course) the Backstreet Boys!

“Tan?” Alex asked, looking up with a twisted look on his face. “Did you really buy me a teenybopper subscription?”

“I really did.”

Then Tana handed Alex a small box. He pulled up the velvety top to reveal a ring. I was about a half and inch wide, and it was circle with Chinese symbols. “This one,” Tana said, sliding herself closer to Alex, “means music. This one,” She said, pointing to the next one, “is dreams. And here’s peace, safety and success. So when you’re on the road, you’ll have all these things with you.”

Alex pointed to the 2 Tana had not interpreted. “What are these?”

Tana paused for a minute, then spoke softly. “Love and trust.”

Alex pulled her into his warm embrace. “I’ll wear it always,” he told her, slipping the ring onto his middle finger. “That way I’ll always have a part of you close to me.” He released her from his hold and reached into his pocket. “I have 2 gifts for you. Here’s the first,” he said, handing her a small, unwrapped box.

Tana opened the box and carefully lifted the necklace. She fingered the pendant in complete silence before turning it over to read the inscription, which said If you only knew. “Alex?” she said, looking up at him. “It’s so beautiful, but what’s the inscription mean?”

“Well, that’s the other present.” He reached behind him and grabbed his guitar. “This is a song I wrote. And the title is “If You Only Knew,” the same as the phrase on your necklace.”

Alex played the opening strains of his R&B ballad once before beginning the song again. Tana listened intently as Alex’s raspy voice filled her heart and head with the words of his heart:
I saw your world come crashing down
I know it’s hard to trust
But somehow truer love was found
And, babe, our love’s a must
If only he hadn’t broken your heart
Of only you weren’t afraid to love
If only we’d had an easier start
I’d be better for you than he ever was

If you only saw the face I see
If you only knew what you did to me
If you only felt the love I do
You’d love me, too, if you only knew
(If you only saw, if you only knew, If you only felt, You’d love me too)

I know his heart filled yours with lies
He said he’d never leave
I see the sadness in your eyes
But, babe, he’s not like me
If you’d only tell me what’s on your mind
If you’d only open your heart to me
If you’d only realize I’m not his kind
We’d have a chance if only you’d see

If you only saw the face I see
If you only knew what you did to me
If you only felt the love I do
You’d love me, too, if you only knew
(If you only saw, if you only knew, If you only felt, You’d love me too)

Girl, please, I know it hurts
But I won’t break your heart
I’ll show you how true love works
If you’ll only let me start

By the end of the song, Tana was crying. As Alex played the last chord, he looked deep into Tana’s deep green eyes. “Tana, I mean every word of it. I want us to be free of fear, free of the past and free of-“

Alex’s sentence was cut off by Tana’s lips on his. Tana had moved closer as he spoke, and by the time their lips met, their bodies were just millimeters apart. After his initial shock wore off, Alex closed the small gap between them and returned the kiss whole-heartedly. His fingers found their way into Tana’s thick hair, and her hands rested lightly on his back. Alex took in every detail of the way it all was; its smell, its taste, and its sound. Only when Tana slowly retreated did he open his eyes and take in its sight. He felt as though he was seeing a whole new girl. The fear that had always been a part of Tana had left, and in its place was a young woman, eager to begin a new relationship.

“We’re free,” Tana whispered, leaning into the groove of Alex’s shoulder. She wasn’t sure what had come over her. As Alex had played his song, Tana had felt her fears slipping away. By the time the final chord had died out, she knew she was finally ready to move on.

THE END

If You Only Knew
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"If You Only Knew [story version]"
original by Lizzi & Sammy for Silver Lining
Not for any other use